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help i need advise

help i need advise

Old Aug 10th 2005, 9:24 pm
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Default help i need advise

i am back in england for a while and need to sort my shit out while im hear.

i went to america to marry my fiance who is american we met on the internet on a chat room i thoughyt i new him but now im not so sure he is a compleatly different person to what i though he was.

i am visiting my parents he thinks for 2 weeks but i dont want to go back ever but he dosent now that. i am pregnant too with his child so i want to now if he has any rights if i stay hear and dont go back can he force me to go back with his kid.

i need help and advise please.
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Old Aug 10th 2005, 9:29 pm
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Default Re: help i need advise

Originally Posted by Sumner
so i want to now if he has any rights if i stay hear and dont go back can he force me to go back with his kid.

i need help and advise please.
Does he know you're pregnant?
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Old Aug 10th 2005, 9:30 pm
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Default Re: help i need advise

Originally Posted by fatbrit
Does he know you're pregnant?
Yes
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Old Aug 10th 2005, 9:35 pm
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Default Re: help i need advise

Originally Posted by Sumner
Yes
And what does he want to do?
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Old Aug 10th 2005, 9:37 pm
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Default Re: help i need advise

Originally Posted by fatbrit
And what does he want to do?
seems like all he wants to do is sit on his fat ass and watch telly all day he dosent now im thinking of not going back but he must now things arent right all we do is argue all day every day
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Old Aug 10th 2005, 9:42 pm
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Default Re: help i need advise

Originally Posted by Sumner
seems like all he wants to do is sit on his fat ass and watch telly all day he dosent now im thinking of not going back but he must now things arent right all we do is argue all day every day
Can I ask how old you guys are and did you come over as a regular tourist or do you have visa?
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Old Aug 10th 2005, 9:43 pm
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Default Re: help i need advise

Originally Posted by LeedsGirl
Can I ask how old you guys are and did you come over as a regular tourist or do you have visa?

Actually I reread your statement, you are already in England. I would stay put and give birth to bambino in England, not sure of his legal rights but I don't think he's got a cat's chance of taking the baby out of England.
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Old Aug 10th 2005, 9:43 pm
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Default Re: help i need advise

Originally Posted by Sumner
seems like all he wants to do is sit on his fat ass and watch telly all day he dosent now im thinking of not going back but he must now things arent right all we do is argue all day every day

So, don't go back! You don't have to. Would get legal advice about what to put on the birth certificate and future problems that may arise. I always found the Citizen Advice Bureau to be a worthwhile trip in the UK. Give 'em a go!
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Old Aug 10th 2005, 9:45 pm
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Post Re: help i need advise

I'm trying to decide if you are a troll or not. The writing style reminds me of someone called 'Guinevere' and possibly 'Sparkster'.

In the event that you're not a troll, then the answer is plain and simple.

Do not return to the US (you probably don't even have medical insurance to cover pregnancy and birth in the US anyway?). I assume you intend to keep the child and not have an abortion or have the child adopted?

If you deliver a child in the UK and the father's name is not on the birth certificate, the father has no rights whatsoever. There is nothing the father can do to make you return with the baby to the US.

What does your family in the UK have to say about the situation?

(A warning to all men impregnating British women resident in the UK; unless you are prepared to financially (and hopefully emotionally) support a child until it reaches the age of 18 and take a full part in that child's life, then legally it is in your best interest to either marry the mother or at the very least have your name listed as the father on the birth certificate - but having your name on the birth certificate is entirely at the mother's discretion. Otherwise you will have all the financial obligations - you may be ordered by the courts to provide a DNA sample and pay maintainance - but in law you will have absolutely no parental rights and the mother calls all the shots re; access etc. Best to use a condom if you don't want the responsibility!)

Last edited by Englishmum; Aug 10th 2005 at 9:54 pm.
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Old Aug 10th 2005, 9:47 pm
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Default Re: help i need advise

Originally Posted by Englishmum
I'm trying to decide if you are a troll or not. The writing style reminds me of someone called 'Guinevere' and possibly 'Sparkster'.
That was my first thought.
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Old Aug 10th 2005, 9:48 pm
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Default Re: help i need advise

Originally Posted by fatbrit
So, don't go back! You don't have to. Would get legal advice about what to put on the birth certificate and future problems that may arise. I always found the Citizen Advice Bureau to be a worthwhile trip in the UK. Give 'em a go!
Thank you thats what i wanted to hear. i will try the cab hadnt thought of them. i just dont now if theirs anything in american law that says he has rights even though the kid isnt born yet. will the csa be a problem
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Old Aug 10th 2005, 9:52 pm
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Default Re: help i need advise

Originally Posted by Sumner
Thank you thats what i wanted to hear. i will try the cab hadnt thought of them. i just dont now if theirs anything in american law that says he has rights even though the kid isnt born yet. will the csa be a problem
He may well have rights under American law. But if you're in the UK, you come under UK law, so there's nothing to worry about there. Wouldn't make a trip to the US though until you've sorted it all out.
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Old Aug 10th 2005, 9:56 pm
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Default Re: help i need advise

Originally Posted by Sumner
Thank you thats what i wanted to hear. i will try the cab hadnt thought of them. i just dont now if theirs anything in american law that says he has rights even though the kid isnt born yet. will the csa be a problem
I should imagine that the CSA can't order an American citizen living in the USA to pay maintainance.....and even if it did, it can't enforce it unless he chooses to live in the UK. Do a google search for the CSA.
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Old Aug 10th 2005, 9:57 pm
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Default Re: help i need advise

Originally Posted by Englishmum
I'm trying to decide if you are a troll or not. The writing style reminds me of someone called 'Guinevere' and possibly 'Sparkster'.

In the event that you're not a troll, then the answer is plain and simple.

Do not return to the US (you probably don't even have medical insurance to cover pregnancy and birth in the US anyway?). I assume you intend to keep the child and not have an abortion or have the child adopted?

If you deliver a child in the UK and the father's name is not on the birth certificate, the father has no rights whatsoever. There is nothing the father can do to make you return with the baby to the US.

What does your family in the UK have to say about the situation?


Unless for some reason down the road, the child would want to claim US citizenship. This is an issue that has already made the rounds of the US Supreme Court.
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Old Aug 10th 2005, 10:06 pm
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Default Re: help i need advise

Of course if the fathers name isnt on the birth cert then proving dual citizenship later on would be difficult.
 

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