Found: "Why Americans Should Never Be Allowed To Travel"
Dec 29th 2005, 6:33 pm
#1
Through the square window
Thread Starter
Joined: Apr 2002
Posts: 2,723
Found: "Why Americans Should Never Be Allowed To Travel"
Seems to be a bit of a quiet day on here, so here's something to fill.. 30 seconds of your time.
The following are actual stories provided by travel agents:
Find all of them here:
http://www.strangeplaces.net/weirdthings/travel.html
Finally one from my own memory:
Many years ago I was working at a hotel in the Lake District.
They used to bus in loads of Americans on a package tour.
One lady got of the coach and said: "My, how blue that lake is. Do you put dye in it ?"
The following are actual stories provided by travel agents:
" A client called in inquiring about a package to Hawaii. After going over all the cost info, she asked, "Would it be cheaper to fly to California and then take the train to Hawaii?"
" I got a call from a woman who wanted to go to Capetown. I started to explain the length of the flight and the passport information when she interrupted me with "I'm not trying to make you look stupid, but Capetown is in Massachusetts. "Without trying to make her look like the stupid one, I calmly explained, "Capecod is in Massachusetts, Capetown is in Africa." Her response ... click."
" I got a call from a man who asked, "Is it possible to see England from Canada?" I said, "No." He said "But they look so close on the map."
http://www.strangeplaces.net/weirdthings/travel.html
Finally one from my own memory:
Many years ago I was working at a hotel in the Lake District.
They used to bus in loads of Americans on a package tour.
One lady got of the coach and said: "My, how blue that lake is. Do you put dye in it ?"
Dec 29th 2005, 6:38 pm
#2
Account Closed
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 15,019
Re: Found: "Why Americans Should Never Be Allowed To Travel"
LOL I dunno these Americans make me laugh....I can well believe the stories as I was a flight attendant for many yrs until 4 yrs ago. You've gotta laugh at them 
Dec 29th 2005, 6:46 pm
#3
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Joined: Aug 2005
Location: Melbourne, Oz to Banbury, England to El Mirage, AZ & now back to England!
Posts: 5,989
Re: Found: "Why Americans Should Never Be Allowed To Travel"
Hill-hairy-arse!
Dec 29th 2005, 6:55 pm
#4
Through the square window
Thread Starter
Joined: Apr 2002
Posts: 2,723
Re: Found: "Why Americans Should Never Be Allowed To Travel"
There's a whole load more at the index:
http://www.strangeplaces.net/weirdthings/index.html
Example:
Laws of the U.S (These are real standing laws from around the United States of America.)
Link: http://www.strangeplaces.net/weirdthings/laws.html
http://www.strangeplaces.net/weirdthings/index.html
Example:
Laws of the U.S (These are real standing laws from around the United States of America.)
"Alabama:
1. It is illegal for a driver to be blindfolded while operating a vehicle.
1. It is illegal for a driver to be blindfolded while operating a vehicle.
"California:
1. Community leaders passed an ordinance that makes it illegal for anyone to try and stop a child from playfully jumping over puddles of water."
1. Community leaders passed an ordinance that makes it illegal for anyone to try and stop a child from playfully jumping over puddles of water."
Connecticut:
1. You can be stopped by the police for biking over 65 miles per hour.
2. You are not allowed to walk across a street on your hands.
1. You can be stopped by the police for biking over 65 miles per hour.
2. You are not allowed to walk across a street on your hands.
Dec 29th 2005, 6:58 pm
#5
@matthewb76
Joined: Jul 2003
Location: Missouri
Posts: 21,886
Re: Found: "Why Americans Should Never Be Allowed To Travel"
"Alabama:
1. It is illegal for a driver to be blindfolded while operating a vehicle.
1. It is illegal for a driver to be blindfolded while operating a vehicle.
Dec 29th 2005, 7:07 pm
#6
Account Closed
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 15,019
Re: Found: "Why Americans Should Never Be Allowed To Travel"
Originally Posted by Manc
I have to ask.................was it such a big problem that they needed to pass a law against it?
LOL
seems pretty elementary to keep the blindfold off ...LOL tks for your post Manc...it made me
Dec 29th 2005, 7:10 pm
#7
Captain Caaaaaaveeemaaaan
Joined: Mar 2005
Location: Nash Vegas ! ! !
Posts: 750
Re: Found: "Why Americans Should Never Be Allowed To Travel"
After we'd moved here, our neighbor's daughter asked me where I was from.... I told her I was British. She then asked me how come I spoke such good English for only being here for a few months. I reminded her that British mean English - and in England we speak English.... she felt rather stupid. It wouldn't have been so bad, but she is 18 and had jsut graduated high school ! 
Dec 29th 2005, 7:15 pm
#8
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Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 15,019
Re: Found: "Why Americans Should Never Be Allowed To Travel"
Texas:
1. A city ordinance states that a person cannot go barefoot without first obtaining a special five-dollar permit.
2. It is illegal to take more than three sips of beer at a time while standing.
LOL another law here in TX is that you cannot walk down the street with a pair of pliers in your pocket but LOL you can carry a gun...
I'm sure us Brits have some crazy old laws but these are a bit OTT
1. A city ordinance states that a person cannot go barefoot without first obtaining a special five-dollar permit.
2. It is illegal to take more than three sips of beer at a time while standing.
LOL another law here in TX is that you cannot walk down the street with a pair of pliers in your pocket but LOL you can carry a gun...
I'm sure us Brits have some crazy old laws but these are a bit OTT
Dec 29th 2005, 7:16 pm
#9
Account Closed
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 15,019
Re: Found: "Why Americans Should Never Be Allowed To Travel"
Originally Posted by TN-Dave
After we'd moved here, our neighbor's daughter asked me where I was from.... I told her I was British. She then asked me how come I spoke such good English for only being here for a few months. I reminded her that British mean English - and in England we speak English.... she felt rather stupid. It wouldn't have been so bad, but she is 18 and had jsut graduated high school !
shame, poor thing and that's the American's future generation...
Dec 29th 2005, 7:19 pm
#10
CA to TX to Jamaica
Joined: Jun 2003
Location: Location, Location.
Posts: 4,887
Re: Found: "Why Americans Should Never Be Allowed To Travel"
Originally Posted by TN-Dave
After we'd moved here, our neighbor's daughter asked me where I was from.... I told her I was British. She then asked me how come I spoke such good English for only being here for a few months. I reminded her that British mean English - and in England we speak English.... she felt rather stupid. It wouldn't have been so bad, but she is 18 and had jsut graduated high school !
"Shut up, you can't even speak English properly!!!!"
Dec 29th 2005, 7:23 pm
#11
Captain Caaaaaaveeemaaaan
Joined: Mar 2005
Location: Nash Vegas ! ! !
Posts: 750
Re: Found: "Why Americans Should Never Be Allowed To Travel"
Originally Posted by CaliforniaBride
A woman decided to slam on her brakes in front of me and let her friend waddle to Toy's R Us. The corn syrup and saturated fat diet had immobilised her. Driving past I shouted "the car park is over there!" (well it was boxing day, I was a little frazzled). To which she replied:
"Shut up, you can't even speak English properly!!!!"
"Shut up, you can't even speak English properly!!!!"
LMAO !!!!!!!!!!!
Dec 29th 2005, 7:24 pm
#12
Captain Caaaaaaveeemaaaan
Joined: Mar 2005
Location: Nash Vegas ! ! !
Posts: 750
Re: Found: "Why Americans Should Never Be Allowed To Travel"
Originally Posted by Manc
In Michigan it is illegal to serenade your wife.
I was gutted when I found out.
I was gutted when I found out.
Dec 29th 2005, 7:37 pm
#13
Back where I belong!
Joined: Aug 2005
Location: Melbourne, Oz to Banbury, England to El Mirage, AZ & now back to England!
Posts: 5,989
Re: Found: "Why Americans Should Never Be Allowed To Travel"
Originally Posted by CaliforniaBride
A woman decided to slam on her brakes in front of me and let her friend waddle to Toy's R Us. The corn syrup and saturated fat diet had immobilised her. Driving past I shouted "the car park is over there!" (well it was boxing day, I was a little frazzled). To which she replied:
"Shut up, you can't even speak English properly!!!!"
"Shut up, you can't even speak English properly!!!!"
Dec 29th 2005, 8:02 pm
#14
CA to TX to Jamaica
Joined: Jun 2003
Location: Location, Location.
Posts: 4,887
Re: Found: "Why Americans Should Never Be Allowed To Travel"
Originally Posted by Partystar
I find a "I am English, B*tch!" reply would've worked nicely!
Dec 29th 2005, 8:04 pm
#15
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Joined: Dec 2002
Location: Ft Lauderdale, FL
Posts: 4,792
Re: Found: "Why Americans Should Never Be Allowed To Travel"
Originally Posted by Webbie
Seems to be a bit of a quiet day on here, so here's something to fill.. 30 seconds of your time.
The following are actual stories provided by travel agents:
Find all of them here:
http://www.strangeplaces.net/weirdthings/travel.html
Finally one from my own memory:
Many years ago I was working at a hotel in the Lake District.
They used to bus in loads of Americans on a package tour.
One lady got of the coach and said: "My, how blue that lake is. Do you put dye in it ?"
The following are actual stories provided by travel agents:
Find all of them here:
http://www.strangeplaces.net/weirdthings/travel.html
Finally one from my own memory:
Many years ago I was working at a hotel in the Lake District.
They used to bus in loads of Americans on a package tour.
One lady got of the coach and said: "My, how blue that lake is. Do you put dye in it ?"
Reg. Frank R.