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Is employment here more traditionally sexist?

Is employment here more traditionally sexist?

Old Mar 13th 2006, 7:42 pm
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Default Is employment here more traditionally sexist?

I'm wondering how many of you have come across difficulties in the workplace that you wouldn't have encountered in the UK.
So far, my employment experience in the USA has been a less than wonderful.

As for being female, I wonder that as gender roles in the USA are more traditionally defined than they are in Britain, does this lead to more sexism in the workplace?

In my two years in the USA I've had five different jobs, as I temped for a while when I first moved here.
I've had regular comments on my appearence, been told it's nice and enjoyable "when I wear a skirt" been told to, "speak properly, or go and learn real English" (when talking to another Brit I pronouced tuna - 'choona')

In my first job I was regularly kissed good morning by my boss when no one was around, (who assured me, that as he was from an American-Italian family this was standard practice) and had someone regularly put his hand on my thigh when he would lean over my desk to help me with a computer problem and again whenever we were alone travelling to a meeting together.

Then this morning, in our usual morning meeting, my boss, in front of the all-male staff proceeded to comment on how my face looked!

Is it because I'm tall and they're intimidated? Is it because I have an accent? Is it because I'm younger than they are? I just dont' get it.

When I worked in England, I never had any of this sort of treatment, all the men I worked with have been, by and large, really good blokes and always completely professional.
Is it just my bad luck, or are things worse over here for women in the workplace than they are in Britain?
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Old Mar 13th 2006, 7:44 pm
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Default Re: Is employment here more traditionally sexist?

Originally Posted by Sarah
I'm wondering how many of you have come across difficulties in the workplace that you wouldn't have encountered in the UK.
So far, my employment experience in the USA has been a less than wonderful.

As for being female, I wonder that as gender roles in the USA are more traditionally defined than they are in Britain, does this lead to more sexism in the workplace?

In my two years in the USA I've had five different jobs, as I temped for a while when I first moved here.
I've had regular comments on my appearence, been told it's nice and enjoyable "when I wear a skirt" been told to, "speak properly, or go and learn real English" (when talking to another Brit I pronouced tuna - 'choona')

In my first job I was regularly kissed good morning by my boss when no one was around, (who assured me, that as he was from an American-Italian family this was standard practice) and had someone regularly put his hand on my thigh when he would lean over my desk to help me with a computer problem and again whenever we were alone travelling to a meeting together.

Then this morning, in our usual morning meeting, my boss, in front of the all-male staff proceeded to comment on how my face looked!

Is it because I'm tall and they're intimidated? Is it because I have an accent? Is it because I'm younger than they are? I just dont' get it.

When I worked in England, I never had any of this sort of treatment, all the men I worked with have been, by and large, really good blokes and always completely professional.
Is it just my bad luck, or are things worse over here for women in the workplace than they are in Britain?
If it makes you feel any better my experiences of the American workplace so far are not good ones either - and I'm a bloke.

Still, at least I can call people wanker to their face
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Old Mar 13th 2006, 7:45 pm
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Default Re: Is employment here more traditionally sexist?

Originally Posted by Sarah
I'm wondering how many of you have come across difficulties in the workplace that you wouldn't have encountered in the UK.
So far, my employment experience in the USA has been a less than wonderful.

As for being female, I wonder that as gender roles in the USA are more traditionally defined than they are in Britain, does this lead to more sexism in the workplace?

In my two years in the USA I've had five different jobs, as I temped for a while when I first moved here.
I've had regular comments on my appearence, been told it's nice and enjoyable "when I wear a skirt" been told to, "speak properly, or go and learn real English" (when talking to another Brit I pronouced tuna - 'choona')

In my first job I was regularly kissed good morning by my boss when no one was around, (who assured me, that as he was from an American-Italian family this was standard practice) and had someone regularly put his hand on my thigh when he would lean over my desk to help me with a computer problem and again whenever we were alone travelling to a meeting together.

Then this morning, in our usual morning meeting, my boss, in front of the all-male staff proceeded to comment on how my face looked!

Is it because I'm tall and they're intimidated? Is it because I have an accent? Is it because I'm younger than they are? I just dont' get it.

When I worked in England, I never had any of this sort of treatment, all the men I worked with have been, by and large, really good blokes and always completely professional.
Is it just my bad luck, or are things worse over here for women in the workplace than they are in Britain?
of course its not, sexy bum.
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Old Mar 13th 2006, 7:47 pm
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Default Re: Is employment here more traditionally sexist?

Originally Posted by Sarah
Is it because I'm tall and they're intimidated? Is it because I have an accent? Is it because I'm younger than they are? I just dont' get it.
I think it's cos there all a bunch of [email protected] your work, not all blokes in the US, that is
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Old Mar 13th 2006, 7:48 pm
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Default Re: Is employment here more traditionally sexist?

Can't speak to England, but.....

If this sort of thing pops up in a mostly-male environment, you're pretty well doomed to live with it or leave.

It's technically against the law, but to get the law enforced means calling in the feds and causing the company a huge amount of hassle. And that's why many places won't hire females (though they aren't supposed to discriminate in hiring) because they believe that "friction" between coworkers won't be as great.

If there are other females, you can enquire as to whether or not they've felt uncomfortable and see what they decided to do about it.

If you want to stay, you can defend yourself, but watch out -- defend yourself in public. Otherwise Mr Perv will badmouth you to his coworkers, if they didn't see the original confrontation.

I find, "Oh, so can my husband feel up your wife?" very effective if you just have to defend yourself.

Note to men: please don't do this in the workplace. Don't take it personally if a woman doesn't want to hear dirty jokes or get spanked on the ass as you walk by. You wouldn't want this for your wife or mother or daughter or sister.
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Old Mar 13th 2006, 7:58 pm
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Default Re: Is employment here more traditionally sexist?

Or of course use you feminine wiles to your advantage ....
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Old Mar 13th 2006, 8:01 pm
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Default Re: Is employment here more traditionally sexist?

Sweeping generalisation and tin hat on here............

America is the most sexist country I've lived and worked in.

I'm ready to be slated for that remark now,but I found it that way.
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Old Mar 13th 2006, 8:03 pm
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Default Re: Is employment here more traditionally sexist?

Originally Posted by cupranod
Sweeping generalisation and tin hat on here............

America is the most sexist country I've lived and worked in.

I'm ready to be slated for that remark now,but I found it that way.
You might be surprised...
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Old Mar 13th 2006, 8:04 pm
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Default Re: Is employment here more traditionally sexist?

Originally Posted by Sarah
I'm wondering how many of you have come across difficulties in the workplace that you wouldn't have encountered in the UK.
So far, my employment experience in the USA has been a less than wonderful.

As for being female, I wonder that as gender roles in the USA are more traditionally defined than they are in Britain, does this lead to more sexism in the workplace?

In my two years in the USA I've had five different jobs, as I temped for a while when I first moved here.
I've had regular comments on my appearence, been told it's nice and enjoyable "when I wear a skirt" been told to, "speak properly, or go and learn real English" (when talking to another Brit I pronouced tuna - 'choona')

In my first job I was regularly kissed good morning by my boss when no one was around, (who assured me, that as he was from an American-Italian family this was standard practice) and had someone regularly put his hand on my thigh when he would lean over my desk to help me with a computer problem and again whenever we were alone travelling to a meeting together.

Then this morning, in our usual morning meeting, my boss, in front of the all-male staff proceeded to comment on how my face looked!

Is it because I'm tall and they're intimidated? Is it because I have an accent? Is it because I'm younger than they are? I just dont' get it.

When I worked in England, I never had any of this sort of treatment, all the men I worked with have been, by and large, really good blokes and always completely professional.
Is it just my bad luck, or are things worse over here for women in the workplace than they are in Britain?
I would be surprised if it was more sexist... what with all the litigation the goes on.

My company settled out of court with a woman for a good few thousand dollars because a male colleague mentioned how nice her boobs were.
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Old Mar 13th 2006, 8:07 pm
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Default Re: Is employment here more traditionally sexist?

I work in Commercial Real Estate and the men in this business are the biggest load of tossers I have ever met in my life, cannot wait to get out of this business which will hopefully be sometime this year! You are not alone Sarah.
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Old Mar 13th 2006, 8:11 pm
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Default Re: Is employment here more traditionally sexist?

My company has "Integrity Hotline" posters in the office, which is serviced by a third party, so if anyone misbehaves, they can be reported.
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Old Mar 13th 2006, 8:35 pm
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Default Re: Is employment here more traditionally sexist?

Originally Posted by Elsie The Maid
My company has "Integrity Hotline" posters in the office, which is serviced by a third party, so if anyone misbehaves, they can be reported.
It can be down to politics, though.... if manager ABC is politically well connected, a big corporation will manage to transfer or rid itself of someone who "doesn't fit in." Remember, their legal budget is huge -- much bigger than an indvidual's, and these sorts of cases aren't usually taken on a contigency basis.

It's all down to the company leadership. I've heard and seen some things that I thought would certainly either get someone fired or an EEOC action taken.... nope. Unless it's just blatant, so blatant that the company would want to rid itself of a loose cannon anyway, it's a tough road for a woman to file and win a lawsuit.
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Old Mar 13th 2006, 9:00 pm
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Default Re: Is employment here more traditionally sexist?

Originally Posted by snowbunny
It can be down to politics, though.... if manager ABC is politically well connected, a big corporation will manage to transfer or rid itself of someone who "doesn't fit in." Remember, their legal budget is huge -- much bigger than an indvidual's, and these sorts of cases aren't usually taken on a contigency basis.

It's all down to the company leadership. I've heard and seen some things that I thought would certainly either get someone fired or an EEOC action taken.... nope. Unless it's just blatant, so blatant that the company would want to rid itself of a loose cannon anyway, it's a tough road for a woman to file and win a lawsuit.

Btw...it's an anonymous hotline!
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Old Mar 13th 2006, 9:07 pm
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Default Re: Is employment here more traditionally sexist?

Originally Posted by Sarah
I'm wondering how many of you have come across difficulties in the workplace that you wouldn't have encountered in the UK.
So far, my employment experience in the USA has been a less than wonderful.

As for being female, I wonder that as gender roles in the USA are more traditionally defined than they are in Britain, does this lead to more sexism in the workplace?

In my two years in the USA I've had five different jobs, as I temped for a while when I first moved here.
I've had regular comments on my appearence, been told it's nice and enjoyable "when I wear a skirt" been told to, "speak properly, or go and learn real English" (when talking to another Brit I pronouced tuna - 'choona')

In my first job I was regularly kissed good morning by my boss when no one was around, (who assured me, that as he was from an American-Italian family this was standard practice) and had someone regularly put his hand on my thigh when he would lean over my desk to help me with a computer problem and again whenever we were alone travelling to a meeting together.

Then this morning, in our usual morning meeting, my boss, in front of the all-male staff proceeded to comment on how my face looked!

Is it because I'm tall and they're intimidated? Is it because I have an accent? Is it because I'm younger than they are? I just dont' get it.

When I worked in England, I never had any of this sort of treatment, all the men I worked with have been, by and large, really good blokes and always completely professional.
Is it just my bad luck, or are things worse over here for women in the workplace than they are in Britain?
Depends on how you've been dealing with the harrassment/attention. If the man is not given a clear message that you don't "appreciate" the attention/harrassment, then he'll continue.

Maybe the words, "I'll report you for sexual harrassment" might do the trick or some such similar statement.

Some would say a quick kick in the balls might do the trick but I'm not going to suggest that...
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Old Mar 13th 2006, 9:21 pm
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Default Re: Is employment here more traditionally sexist?

Originally Posted by Celsius
Depends on how you've been dealing with the harrassment/attention. If the man is not given a clear message that you don't "appreciate" the attention/harrassment, then he'll continue.

Maybe the words, "I'll report you for sexual harrassment" might do the trick or some such similar statement.

Some would say a quick kick in the balls might do the trick but I'm not going to suggest that...
Right now I'm not in the job where I experience sexual harrassment, just sly digs about my facial expressions eg, "You look bored/tired/worried/lost etc." when I'll just be doing something like filing a report, sitting in a meeting, or looking at my mail.

Also I'll be asked to sit in on meetings for other departments, that are for projects that have nothing to do with me and no relevance to my job.
My boss will then ask me what I have to contribute, knowing full well I have nothing to say because I don't understand what they're talking about (uranium mining, pyrite deposits in hillsides etc) when I say I don't have a contribution he'll make another crack, stare at me and shake his head.

Obviously the aim of his behaviour is to humiliate, undermine and upset. How are you supposed to deal with this, when its the person who can fire you, is the one behaving like a jackass?

The one saving grace is that this guy works elsewhere and only comes to our office once a month or so.
I imagine grin and bear it is my only real option.
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