Originally Posted by Colorado Ski Girl

You know, it's more of a way of trying to find something in common. A person could just as easily come up to you and ask you if you like Italian food instead. We try to find commonalities to begin a conversation, and sometimes our jobs are what we love to do. Not exclusively, but a good number of us enjoy our jobs or we find something else to do. So we may ask about your job or about your favorite pasta, then the conversation goes anywhere from there. We're just trying to get to know you.

Originally Posted by Colorado Ski Girl

I just thought of something - how is speaking randomly at the pub or on the subway/train be any different than speaking randomly on the street? I wouldn't know you either way. But I would be trying to get to know you either way. Isn't it still the same thing, abeit different locations?

Originally Posted by dlake02

That's easy.

Street - you are walking to get somewhere and are probably moving quite fast. This is personal time and you are occupied. Not in a mood to socialise or talk.

Train.

The train breaks-down, is delayed, and you sigh. The person opposite you will say something like "yes I know, annoying isn't it." You will strike up a conversation based on that shared experience. Not a friendship, a conversation.

Pub.

Not an expert here, but again, probably shared experiences like a football match, quiz night, etc. Or something stupid like spilling a drink, but be careful, because you may just get sworn at....

Originally Posted by Ethelred_the_Unready

Southern hospitality. I've experienced it, I know it's not fake at all. Even though culturally and politically I would be so out of place anywhere in the south, I always appreciate the good manners and hospitality. I guess that's why you complimented me and I get it. I respect that's how you were raised, I hope you also understand how such things (aside from routine politeness) would be quite alien in my home culture.

We do have a common language, but living here for so long has made me realise that when push comes to shove, us British people have more in common with say a Swede, a Dane or a Dutch person than an American. Gasp, maybe even the French. I took a holiday to Paris 2 years ago and aside from the beauty of the city, what hit me the most was a sense of being "home" (and I'd never been to Paris itself before). I am not bashing your country in any way, but as I have always said, I am a square peg trying to fit into a round hole. It just doesn't work. Even your own outlook is so radically different from mine - I don't see life as a competition and yes, I do want to be "friends" with at least a couple of my co-workers as it's beneficial to me and beneficial to the company.

One last thing, don't ever lose your southern accent

Originally Posted by Colorado Ski Girl

This is how true friendships start for us. You guys want to find long-lasting friendships with us and we want the same with you. We just have to realize that we as two different people from different cultures are just that - different. We should respect that seperate and cultural need for connection and find a way to accomplish it. Americans are generally friendly and want to get to know you, but we achieve it in the only way that we know how - to just coe up to you and talk to you. That, to us, is the best way to say 'Hello - I'd like to get to know you better'. It isn't perfect, but it's all that we know. When you see American movies and the girl just walks up to the guy at the grocery store checkout line and starts a conversation, it's true to life. We like to chat as a way to get to interact with each other.

So I am curious - what would I need to do to get to know you better? How do you make friends if you don't talk to someone directly? I'm being serious here.

Originally Posted by Sally Redux

Get your coat Ethelred, you've pulled

Originally Posted by Colorado Ski Girl

We don't have to have everything in common, do we? And actually, our outlooks aren't so different. We all want to have true friends. We all want to be liked for who we are. Square pegs don't have to fit round holes.

Americans are competitive but not with friends, at least not with anything other than friendly competition, such as "I hope that the Florida Gators beat Auburn in football this weekend!!". It isn't as cutthroat as you think.

I like Paris, too. I was there this past September. I t was a sunny day, which I herad was rare there. And I met a lot of interesting and friendly people. Then again, I can speak very, very basic French, at least enough to locate the restrooms. That's actually important, depending on what you had for lunch. And making friends with coworkers is great! If you find that they want to be friends with you, go for it. Absolutely nothing wrong with that. Remember that people that you don't work with will still want to be friends with you if you give them half a chance.

Originally Posted by AmerLisa

I hope he doesn't hand over his phone number or address!

Originally Posted by AmerLisa

Here's a live one for you Colorado! Perhaps you could help his cause by being a true friend and getting him over here!

http://britishexpats.com/forum/showthread.php?t=777690

Originally Posted by Colorado Ski Girl

Why are you being so hateful??

Originally Posted by AmerLisa

I cannot believe you're still spouting off your crap! I can only hope that whomever you're interacting with, will truly understand that you're feeding them a bunch of bull!

As someone said earlier, I guess it makes for interesting fictional reading!

Originally Posted by Colorado Ski Girl

We don't have to have everything in common, do we? And actually, our outlooks aren't so different. We all want to have true friends. We all want to be liked for who we are. Square pegs don't have to fit round holes.

Americans are competitive but not with friends, at least not with anything other than friendly competition, such as "I hope that the Florida Gators beat Auburn in football this weekend!!". It isn't as cutthroat as you think.

I like Paris, too. I was there this past September. I t was a sunny day, which I herad was rare there. And I met a lot of interesting and friendly people. Then again, I can speak very, very basic French, at least enough to locate the restrooms. That's actually important, depending on what you had for lunch. And making friends with coworkers is great! If you find that they want to be friends with you, go for it. Absolutely nothing wrong with that. Remember that people that you don't work with will still want to be friends with you if you give them half a chance.

Originally Posted by Colorado Ski Girl

And now I see why you have no friends. Being kind to others is something that you seem not to understand. I don't NEED anyone to take care of me as I have a good job. I do, however, want to understand why you seem to be so full of hate.

Originally Posted by Colorado Ski Girl

And now I see why you have no friends. Being kind to others is something that you seem not to understand. I don't NEED anyone to take care of me as I have a good job. I do, however, want to understand why you seem to be so full of hate.