Did you marry for love?
Jan 27th 2005, 7:13 pm
#1
Senior Moment
Thread Starter
Joined: Nov 2003
Location: NYC
Posts: 5,008
Did you marry for love?
Hi
Last night I had a long conversation with one of my male friends from the UK. He is the same age as me, 28, and is getting married this June.
He's not in love with the girl he's going to marry. My friend was born and raised a muslim but decided pretty early on in his 20's that he thought it was all a load of bollocks and stopped practising, his family aren't that serious about islam and are very liberal so it was no big deal. Point being, there is no pressure from religion or family to marry.
He's found another girl who was also born and raised muslim but is non-practising also. He says that he likes spending time with her, she makes him laugh and he hopes that one day in the future his feelings for her will grow into more than just fondness.
I think he's making a huge mistake, marriage is hard enough when you're crazy in love with your spouse but when you think they're just okay???
I told him I thought he deserved to find someone he loves and can't be without. I don't want him to settle for 2nd best, I want him to be happy and I don't think he will be happy in a marriage like this.
I married Jeff because I couldn't be without him, because he was the first thing I thought about when I woke up, because when I went to work at whatever boring job I had at the time in the UK I did it happily because I knew I was working towards another visit, towards being with him permanently. Sorry to be a total mush here but I love my husband more than I've ever loved anyone and would move mountains to be with him, he's the absolute love of my life and I can't get enough of him.
When I talk to my friend in the UK he says, "I know Sarah, but not everyone gets that, not everyone finds love, so you have to think about who you'd like to grow old with." I felt crestfallen, I know what he says is true, not everyone manages to find someone they are crazy about and who is equally as in love back but I guess I've never been faced with the reality of it before with someone I care about.
I feel so sad for my mate. Did you marry because you were totally and completely head over heels like I was? Or did you marry because you thought you might as well do it now and the person you met you're fond of?
It seems crazy to me, I will be supportive but can't help thinking this will end badly. Any thoughts?
Last night I had a long conversation with one of my male friends from the UK. He is the same age as me, 28, and is getting married this June.
He's not in love with the girl he's going to marry. My friend was born and raised a muslim but decided pretty early on in his 20's that he thought it was all a load of bollocks and stopped practising, his family aren't that serious about islam and are very liberal so it was no big deal. Point being, there is no pressure from religion or family to marry.
He's found another girl who was also born and raised muslim but is non-practising also. He says that he likes spending time with her, she makes him laugh and he hopes that one day in the future his feelings for her will grow into more than just fondness.
I think he's making a huge mistake, marriage is hard enough when you're crazy in love with your spouse but when you think they're just okay???
I told him I thought he deserved to find someone he loves and can't be without. I don't want him to settle for 2nd best, I want him to be happy and I don't think he will be happy in a marriage like this.
I married Jeff because I couldn't be without him, because he was the first thing I thought about when I woke up, because when I went to work at whatever boring job I had at the time in the UK I did it happily because I knew I was working towards another visit, towards being with him permanently. Sorry to be a total mush here but I love my husband more than I've ever loved anyone and would move mountains to be with him, he's the absolute love of my life and I can't get enough of him.
When I talk to my friend in the UK he says, "I know Sarah, but not everyone gets that, not everyone finds love, so you have to think about who you'd like to grow old with." I felt crestfallen, I know what he says is true, not everyone manages to find someone they are crazy about and who is equally as in love back but I guess I've never been faced with the reality of it before with someone I care about.
I feel so sad for my mate. Did you marry because you were totally and completely head over heels like I was? Or did you marry because you thought you might as well do it now and the person you met you're fond of?
It seems crazy to me, I will be supportive but can't help thinking this will end badly. Any thoughts?
Last edited by SarahUK; Jan 27th 2005 at 8:43 pm. Reason: bad spelling
Jan 27th 2005, 7:18 pm
#2
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Nov 2004
Location: SC
Posts: 4,153
Re: Did you marry for love?
Originally Posted by SarahUK
Hi
Last night I had a long conversation with one of my male friends from the UK. We used to work together and he's one of the best guy friends I've ever had. He is the same age as me, 28, and is getting married this June.
There is just one thing about that ,that is bothering me. He's not in love with the girl he's going to marry. My mate was born and raised a muslim but decided pretty early on in his 20's that he thought it was all a load of bollocks and stopped practising, his family aren't that serious about islam and are very liberal so it was no big deal. Point being, there is no pressure from religion or family to marry. He's found another girl who was also born and raised muslim but is non-practising also. He says that he likes spending time with her, she makes him laugh and he hopes that one day in the future his feelings for her will grow into more than just fondness. She is totally head over heels for my friend.
I have to say I flipped out a little on my mate when he told me all this. I think he's making a huge mistake, marriage is hard enough when you're crazy in love with your spouse but when you think they're just okay???
I love my mate, he's ace and I told him I thought he should wait until he meets someone he falls in love with and can't be without. I don't want him to settle for 2nd best, I want him to be happy and I don't think he will be happy in a marriage like this - do you?
I married Jeff because I couldn't be without him, because he was the first thing I thought about when I woke up, because when I went to work at whatever boring job I had at the time in the UK I did it happily because I knew I was working towards another visit, towards being with him permanently. Sorry to be a total mush here but I love my husband more than I've ever loved anyone and would move mountains to be with him, he's the absolute love of my life and I can't get enough of him.
But when I told my mate in the UK this he said, "I know Sarah, but not everyone gets that, not everyone finds true love, so you have to think about who you'd like to grow old with." I felt crestfallen, I know what he says is true, not everyone manages to find someone they are crazy about and who is equally as in love back but I guess I've never been faced with the reality of it before with someone I care about. I feel so sad for my mate. What do you think? Did you marry because you were totally and completely head over heels like I was? Or did you marry becasue you thought you might as well do it now and the person you met you're fond of? It seems crazy to me, I don't know what to say to my mate, I want to be supportive but can't help thinking this will end badly. Argh! What do I do?
Last night I had a long conversation with one of my male friends from the UK. We used to work together and he's one of the best guy friends I've ever had. He is the same age as me, 28, and is getting married this June.
There is just one thing about that ,that is bothering me. He's not in love with the girl he's going to marry. My mate was born and raised a muslim but decided pretty early on in his 20's that he thought it was all a load of bollocks and stopped practising, his family aren't that serious about islam and are very liberal so it was no big deal. Point being, there is no pressure from religion or family to marry. He's found another girl who was also born and raised muslim but is non-practising also. He says that he likes spending time with her, she makes him laugh and he hopes that one day in the future his feelings for her will grow into more than just fondness. She is totally head over heels for my friend.
I have to say I flipped out a little on my mate when he told me all this. I think he's making a huge mistake, marriage is hard enough when you're crazy in love with your spouse but when you think they're just okay???
I love my mate, he's ace and I told him I thought he should wait until he meets someone he falls in love with and can't be without. I don't want him to settle for 2nd best, I want him to be happy and I don't think he will be happy in a marriage like this - do you?
I married Jeff because I couldn't be without him, because he was the first thing I thought about when I woke up, because when I went to work at whatever boring job I had at the time in the UK I did it happily because I knew I was working towards another visit, towards being with him permanently. Sorry to be a total mush here but I love my husband more than I've ever loved anyone and would move mountains to be with him, he's the absolute love of my life and I can't get enough of him.
But when I told my mate in the UK this he said, "I know Sarah, but not everyone gets that, not everyone finds true love, so you have to think about who you'd like to grow old with." I felt crestfallen, I know what he says is true, not everyone manages to find someone they are crazy about and who is equally as in love back but I guess I've never been faced with the reality of it before with someone I care about. I feel so sad for my mate. What do you think? Did you marry because you were totally and completely head over heels like I was? Or did you marry becasue you thought you might as well do it now and the person you met you're fond of? It seems crazy to me, I don't know what to say to my mate, I want to be supportive but can't help thinking this will end badly. Argh! What do I do?
Jan 27th 2005, 7:28 pm
#3
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Joined: Nov 2004
Location: the land of make believe
Posts: 10,528
Re: Did you marry for love?
i was with my partner 9 years when we gor married...things were tense between us as we had just had a child.....we ended up splitting for a while....we have since got back together and have fallen head over heels in love again...what i'm saying is....love doesn't have to be blinding when you get married...not always...your mate might wake up one day and look at the person asleep beside them and think wow...it happened to me 
Jan 27th 2005, 7:35 pm
#4
Back Again
Joined: Aug 2004
Location: Virtual Reality
Posts: 10,831
Re: Did you marry for love?
Originally Posted by SarahUK
I want to be supportive but can't help thinking this will end badly. Argh! What do I do?
your friend knows what he's doing...many relationships were both were head over heals in love can also end in disaster... it's his life, his choice....be a friend be there for him , not everyone gets love dovey mushy ...i didn't . if he didn't love her he wouldn't even be contemplating life with her, just because your friend doesn't express love like an infatuated teenager doesn't mean it's not there....
i married my husband because i fell pregnant...i was scared an unsure and felt like ..no way i can't be in love with this guy!!!...but why did having his children feel so right? I love him more now than i ever would have admitted to myself then......we've been together 10 years and i've never so muched as fancied another guy...
don't judge your friend just be there good or bad, isn't that what being a good pal is all about?
Jan 27th 2005, 7:49 pm
#5
Senior Moment
Thread Starter
Joined: Nov 2003
Location: NYC
Posts: 5,008
Re: Did you marry for love?
Originally Posted by Celtic_Angel
Well be supportive then your friend knows what he's doing...many relationships were both were head over heals in love can also end in disaster...
it's his life, his choice....be a friend be there for him , not everyone gets love dovey mushy ...i didn't . if he didn't love her he wouldn't even be contemplating life with her, just because your friend doesn't express love like an infatuated teenager doesn't mean it's not there....
i married my husband because i fell pregnant...i was scared an unsure and felt like ..no way i can't be in love with this guy!!!...but why did having his children feel so right? I love him more now than i ever would have admitted to myself then......we've been together 10 years and i've never so muched as fancied another guy...
don't judge your friend just be there good or bad, isn't that what being a good pal is all about?
your friend knows what he's doing...many relationships were both were head over heals in love can also end in disaster... it's his life, his choice....be a friend be there for him , not everyone gets love dovey mushy ...i didn't . if he didn't love her he wouldn't even be contemplating life with her, just because your friend doesn't express love like an infatuated teenager doesn't mean it's not there....
i married my husband because i fell pregnant...i was scared an unsure and felt like ..no way i can't be in love with this guy!!!...but why did having his children feel so right? I love him more now than i ever would have admitted to myself then......we've been together 10 years and i've never so muched as fancied another guy...
don't judge your friend just be there good or bad, isn't that what being a good pal is all about?
So you didn't marry for love, you married cause you were preggers. Its different to marrying someone cause you love them, even if you do dismiss it as feeling like "an infatuated teenager"
Yep totally intend to be as supportive as possible. Not going to judge him, just want him to have the best in life.
Jan 27th 2005, 7:51 pm
#6
~~~
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 1,849
Re: Did you marry for love?
Originally Posted by SarahUK
Hi
Last night I had a long conversation with one of my male friends from the UK. We used to work together and he's one of the best guy friends I've ever had. He is the same age as me, 28, and is getting married this June.
There is just one thing about that ,that is bothering me. He's not in love with the girl he's going to marry. My mate was born and raised a muslim but decided pretty early on in his 20's that he thought it was all a load of bollocks and stopped practising, his family aren't that serious about islam and are very liberal so it was no big deal. Point being, there is no pressure from religion or family to marry. He's found another girl who was also born and raised muslim but is non-practising also. He says that he likes spending time with her, she makes him laugh and he hopes that one day in the future his feelings for her will grow into more than just fondness. She is totally head over heels for my friend.
I have to say I flipped out a little on my mate when he told me all this. I think he's making a huge mistake, marriage is hard enough when you're crazy in love with your spouse but when you think they're just okay???
I love my mate, he's ace and I told him I thought he should wait until he meets someone he falls in love with and can't be without. I don't want him to settle for 2nd best, I want him to be happy and I don't think he will be happy in a marriage like this - do you?
I married Jeff because I couldn't be without him, because he was the first thing I thought about when I woke up, because when I went to work at whatever boring job I had at the time in the UK I did it happily because I knew I was working towards another visit, towards being with him permanently. Sorry to be a total mush here but I love my husband more than I've ever loved anyone and would move mountains to be with him, he's the absolute love of my life and I can't get enough of him.
But when I told my mate in the UK this he said, "I know Sarah, but not everyone gets that, not everyone finds true love, so you have to think about who you'd like to grow old with." I felt crestfallen, I know what he says is true, not everyone manages to find someone they are crazy about and who is equally as in love back but I guess I've never been faced with the reality of it before with someone I care about. I feel so sad for my mate. What do you think? Did you marry because you were totally and completely head over heels like I was? Or did you marry becasue you thought you might as well do it now and the person you met you're fond of? It seems crazy to me, I don't know what to say to my mate, I want to be supportive but can't help thinking this will end badly. Argh! What do I do?
Last night I had a long conversation with one of my male friends from the UK. We used to work together and he's one of the best guy friends I've ever had. He is the same age as me, 28, and is getting married this June.
There is just one thing about that ,that is bothering me. He's not in love with the girl he's going to marry. My mate was born and raised a muslim but decided pretty early on in his 20's that he thought it was all a load of bollocks and stopped practising, his family aren't that serious about islam and are very liberal so it was no big deal. Point being, there is no pressure from religion or family to marry. He's found another girl who was also born and raised muslim but is non-practising also. He says that he likes spending time with her, she makes him laugh and he hopes that one day in the future his feelings for her will grow into more than just fondness. She is totally head over heels for my friend.
I have to say I flipped out a little on my mate when he told me all this. I think he's making a huge mistake, marriage is hard enough when you're crazy in love with your spouse but when you think they're just okay???
I love my mate, he's ace and I told him I thought he should wait until he meets someone he falls in love with and can't be without. I don't want him to settle for 2nd best, I want him to be happy and I don't think he will be happy in a marriage like this - do you?
I married Jeff because I couldn't be without him, because he was the first thing I thought about when I woke up, because when I went to work at whatever boring job I had at the time in the UK I did it happily because I knew I was working towards another visit, towards being with him permanently. Sorry to be a total mush here but I love my husband more than I've ever loved anyone and would move mountains to be with him, he's the absolute love of my life and I can't get enough of him.
But when I told my mate in the UK this he said, "I know Sarah, but not everyone gets that, not everyone finds true love, so you have to think about who you'd like to grow old with." I felt crestfallen, I know what he says is true, not everyone manages to find someone they are crazy about and who is equally as in love back but I guess I've never been faced with the reality of it before with someone I care about. I feel so sad for my mate. What do you think? Did you marry because you were totally and completely head over heels like I was? Or did you marry becasue you thought you might as well do it now and the person you met you're fond of? It seems crazy to me, I don't know what to say to my mate, I want to be supportive but can't help thinking this will end badly. Argh! What do I do?
I felt useless, I had to stand and watch her make the biggest mistake of her life and was powerless to do anything about it. The thing is it took her two years to pluck up the courage to divorce him. She is now with a wonderful bloke who she really does love and is very very happy.
All you can do for your friend now is let him walk his own path, it may work out or it may not but friends are their for the support they give not the voicing of I told you so's if things fail. You are very lucky as I have been in the fact that we both have found great blokes but this still doesnt guarentee that its forever ...... I know a few people who married thinking they were so in love and 10 years and two kids later have just completed a very messy divorce.
I hope your friend is one of the lucky ones whose love blossoms through friendship as from what ive seen these types go the distance.
Sel x
Jan 27th 2005, 8:10 pm
#7
Back Again
Joined: Aug 2004
Location: Virtual Reality
Posts: 10,831
Re: Did you marry for love?
Originally Posted by SarahUK
So you didn't marry for love, you married cause you were preggers. Its different to marrying someone cause you love them, even if you do dismiss it as feeling like "an infatuated teenager"
Yep totally intend to be as supportive as possible. Not going to judge him, just want him to have the best in life.
Yep totally intend to be as supportive as possible. Not going to judge him, just want him to have the best in life.
don't you think if i hadn't of been in love with the guy i wouldn't have gotten married had two more kids and still be in love 10 years later
My point was not every body goes around feeling like a teenager on cloud nine freely admitting their love...for me it was surprising and difficult to openly admit to myself how i felt about this person, obviously the pregnancy speeded things along....your friend must obviously be of a similar sort....i can't imagine for one second that he would even consider marriage unless...deep down he wasn't in love with this gal
you presume you married for a better reason than I cos you waltz around like a love sick puppy.....gimmie a break!!!
Jan 27th 2005, 8:17 pm
#8
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Jan 2005
Location: the wrong place
Posts: 892
Re: Did you marry for love?
I married for money.....my wife owed less than me
Jan 27th 2005, 8:19 pm
#9
Senior Moment
Thread Starter
Joined: Nov 2003
Location: NYC
Posts: 5,008
Re: Did you marry for love?
Originally Posted by Celtic_Angel
what are you on about dear?
don't you think if i hadn't of been in love with the guy i wouldn't have gotten married had two more kids and still be in love 10 years later
My point was not every body goes around feeling like a teenager on cloud nine freely admitting their love...for me it was surprising and difficult to openly admit to myself how i felt about this person, obviously the pregnancy speeded things along....your friend must obviously be of a similar sort....i can't imagine for one second that he would even consider marriage unless...deep down he wasn't in love with this gal
you presume you married for a better reason than I cos you waltz around like a love sick puppy.....gimmie a break!!!
don't you think if i hadn't of been in love with the guy i wouldn't have gotten married had two more kids and still be in love 10 years later
My point was not every body goes around feeling like a teenager on cloud nine freely admitting their love...for me it was surprising and difficult to openly admit to myself how i felt about this person, obviously the pregnancy speeded things along....your friend must obviously be of a similar sort....i can't imagine for one second that he would even consider marriage unless...deep down he wasn't in love with this gal
you presume you married for a better reason than I cos you waltz around like a love sick puppy.....gimmie a break!!!
I openly admit that I married my husband because I loved him. You said "i married my husband because i fell pregnant...i was scared an unsure and felt like ..no way i can't be in love with this guy" So erm I guess from that statement I assumed you married him because you fell pregnant and not because you loved him. If you're wondering where I got that idea, go back and read your own post.And no my friend does not love this girl. As I said in my post he is marrying her because he is fond of her and because he's reached the age where he wants to get married. He is not in love with her and doesn't love her. Nevermind
Jan 27th 2005, 8:34 pm
#10
Banned
Joined: Oct 2004
Location: Santa Monica,CA from Birmingham, UK
Posts: 18,402
Re: Did you marry for love?
Originally Posted by SarahUK
Hi
Last night I had a long conversation with one of my male friends from the UK. We used to work together and he's one of the best guy friends I've ever had. He is the same age as me, 28, and is getting married this June.
There is just one thing about that ,that is bothering me. He's not in love with the girl he's going to marry. My mate was born and raised a muslim but decided pretty early on in his 20's that he thought it was all a load of bollocks and stopped practising, his family aren't that serious about islam and are very liberal so it was no big deal. Point being, there is no pressure from religion or family to marry. He's found another girl who was also born and raised muslim but is non-practising also. He says that he likes spending time with her, she makes him laugh and he hopes that one day in the future his feelings for her will grow into more than just fondness. She is totally head over heels for my friend.
I have to say I flipped out a little on my mate when he told me all this. I think he's making a huge mistake, marriage is hard enough when you're crazy in love with your spouse but when you think they're just okay???
I love my mate, he's ace and I told him I thought he should wait until he meets someone he falls in love with and can't be without. I don't want him to settle for 2nd best, I want him to be happy and I don't think he will be happy in a marriage like this - do you?
I married Jeff because I couldn't be without him, because he was the first thing I thought about when I woke up, because when I went to work at whatever boring job I had at the time in the UK I did it happily because I knew I was working towards another visit, towards being with him permanently. Sorry to be a total mush here but I love my husband more than I've ever loved anyone and would move mountains to be with him, he's the absolute love of my life and I can't get enough of him.
But when I told my mate in the UK this he said, "I know Sarah, but not everyone gets that, not everyone finds true love, so you have to think about who you'd like to grow old with." I felt crestfallen, I know what he says is true, not everyone manages to find someone they are crazy about and who is equally as in love back but I guess I've never been faced with the reality of it before with someone I care about. I feel so sad for my mate. What do you think? Did you marry because you were totally and completely head over heels like I was? Or did you marry becasue you thought you might as well do it now and the person you met you're fond of? It seems crazy to me, I don't know what to say to my mate, I want to be supportive but can't help thinking this will end badly. Argh! What do I do?
Last night I had a long conversation with one of my male friends from the UK. We used to work together and he's one of the best guy friends I've ever had. He is the same age as me, 28, and is getting married this June.
There is just one thing about that ,that is bothering me. He's not in love with the girl he's going to marry. My mate was born and raised a muslim but decided pretty early on in his 20's that he thought it was all a load of bollocks and stopped practising, his family aren't that serious about islam and are very liberal so it was no big deal. Point being, there is no pressure from religion or family to marry. He's found another girl who was also born and raised muslim but is non-practising also. He says that he likes spending time with her, she makes him laugh and he hopes that one day in the future his feelings for her will grow into more than just fondness. She is totally head over heels for my friend.
I have to say I flipped out a little on my mate when he told me all this. I think he's making a huge mistake, marriage is hard enough when you're crazy in love with your spouse but when you think they're just okay???
I love my mate, he's ace and I told him I thought he should wait until he meets someone he falls in love with and can't be without. I don't want him to settle for 2nd best, I want him to be happy and I don't think he will be happy in a marriage like this - do you?
I married Jeff because I couldn't be without him, because he was the first thing I thought about when I woke up, because when I went to work at whatever boring job I had at the time in the UK I did it happily because I knew I was working towards another visit, towards being with him permanently. Sorry to be a total mush here but I love my husband more than I've ever loved anyone and would move mountains to be with him, he's the absolute love of my life and I can't get enough of him.
But when I told my mate in the UK this he said, "I know Sarah, but not everyone gets that, not everyone finds true love, so you have to think about who you'd like to grow old with." I felt crestfallen, I know what he says is true, not everyone manages to find someone they are crazy about and who is equally as in love back but I guess I've never been faced with the reality of it before with someone I care about. I feel so sad for my mate. What do you think? Did you marry because you were totally and completely head over heels like I was? Or did you marry becasue you thought you might as well do it now and the person you met you're fond of? It seems crazy to me, I don't know what to say to my mate, I want to be supportive but can't help thinking this will end badly. Argh! What do I do?
Jan 27th 2005, 8:38 pm
#11
Senior Moment
Thread Starter
Joined: Nov 2003
Location: NYC
Posts: 5,008
Re: Did you marry for love?
Originally Posted by tomelina
You almost sound a little jealous. In my opinion a platonic relationship between a man and woman is practically none existant, are you sure you don't have a secret penchant towards this man? In my experience most men really want to ' nail ' that 'special' woman freind.
Jan 27th 2005, 8:40 pm
#12
Banned
Joined: Oct 2004
Location: Santa Monica,CA from Birmingham, UK
Posts: 18,402
Re: Did you marry for love?
Originally Posted by SarahUK
Nail him to the floor maybe! No he's a lovely bloke but he's about 5'2" and I'm nearly 6' little men not only are a huge turn off but are also hard to reach.
Jan 27th 2005, 8:42 pm
#13
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 22,105
Re: Did you marry for love?
I think at 28 you probably have a few more light years left in you and don't have to automatically start looking around for a life partner....but at 28 (fastly approaching that awfully old age of 30) it might seem a very important step.
I married very very young the first time around. I was pregnant as well, shotgun wedding is what I called it, only his parents were holding the shotgun.... Anyway, I tried to convince myself over the years that I was in love with him, but I wasn't and I tried very hard for the kids that we had. I felt adamant that we should stay together for our family. However, he was a prat and a first class one at that. One day I met my second husband, my soulmate and then I really found love. And I mean love! I feel as strongly about our relationship now (8 years later) as the first time we met.
I understand the mushy stuff and everything else you're describing. Whether everyone feels that way, I don't know. All I can say on that subject is that I'm sorry they don't. I hope your friend thinks twice about what he's doing....I think he might very well be in a bad situation....especially if he comes across someone he really loves one day and he very well may. He's still young enough to wait and that's probably the advice I'd be giving him.
I married very very young the first time around. I was pregnant as well, shotgun wedding is what I called it, only his parents were holding the shotgun....
Anyway, I tried to convince myself over the years that I was in love with him, but I wasn't and I tried very hard for the kids that we had. I felt adamant that we should stay together for our family. However, he was a prat and a first class one at that. One day I met my second husband, my soulmate and then I really found love. And I mean love! I feel as strongly about our relationship now (8 years later) as the first time we met. I understand the mushy stuff and everything else you're describing. Whether everyone feels that way, I don't know. All I can say on that subject is that I'm sorry they don't. I hope your friend thinks twice about what he's doing....I think he might very well be in a bad situation....especially if he comes across someone he really loves one day and he very well may. He's still young enough to wait and that's probably the advice I'd be giving him.
Jan 27th 2005, 8:53 pm
#14
Banned
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 966
Re: Did you marry for love?
No! Money only. Love might come later.
Jan 27th 2005, 9:21 pm
#15
Back Again
Joined: Aug 2004
Location: Virtual Reality
Posts: 10,831
Re: Did you marry for love?
Originally Posted by SarahUK
Err no I do not presume to be better than you. I openly admit that I married my husband because I loved him. You said "i married my husband because i fell pregnant...i was scared an unsure and felt like ..no way i can't be in love with this guy" So erm I guess from that statement I assumed you married him because you fell pregnant and not because you loved him. If you're wondering where I got that idea, go back and read your own post.
And no my friend does not love this girl. As I said in my post he is marrying her because he is fond of her and because he's reached the age where he wants to get married. He is not in love with her and doesn't love her. Nevermind
I openly admit that I married my husband because I loved him. You said "i married my husband because i fell pregnant...i was scared an unsure and felt like ..no way i can't be in love with this guy" So erm I guess from that statement I assumed you married him because you fell pregnant and not because you loved him. If you're wondering where I got that idea, go back and read your own post.And no my friend does not love this girl. As I said in my post he is marrying her because he is fond of her and because he's reached the age where he wants to get married. He is not in love with her and doesn't love her. Nevermind
I was trying to be positive reminding you that not everyone wears there heart on their sleves, and even if they are in love...admit it?! no way!!!
sounds like your friend is in love with this girl and just doesn't know it yet, why else would he decide to spend the rest of his life with her