AmerLisa

By wording your post in the manner you did, you know darn well you were judging her......why else would you have wrote what you did?

Regardless if she was in the wrong forum or not - would it had made a difference to what you wrote?

violator_dm

Once again. Please, read every word carefully: do not assume things.

AmerLisa

What part of this:

The UK taxpayer must be happy with your position regarding working and paying taxes.

is not a classical snotty sentence? Tell me, were you attempting to be nice with that one sentence? Were you trying to help? Please explain, because if I've got it a$$ backwards, I really want to know!

violator_dm

Here is a sentence:

The UK taxpayer must be happy with your position regarding working and paying taxes.

What's backwards is that you can't read a sentence for what it is. Don't read between the lines. Everything you need to know is in that sentence. You don't need to look for hidden clues because whatever I wanted to say is in it. It's simple.

AmerLisa

Trying to back out of making a cutting remark? Well ok, if that's how you want to play it. I think we both know what you were trying to accomplish with making that remark - you were rude and if you want to try and weasel out of it, whatever.........

violator_dm

You can roll your eyes all you want. But I wasn't the one changing my story. I said what I said. And I have maintained it. Yet you assumed things and don't want to admit it. This conversation is pointless when you're driven by emotions and don't even see the argument in front of you.

AmerLisa

You are seriously making me laugh now.....you were rude and pointless and you just can't admit it.

violator_dm

I am glad to know you can laugh. For a moment there I thought... nevermind

Just Jenney

It seems to me that you and/or your fiance have got to make a compromise somewhere. You're asking for permission to take your daughter to another country to live with you and your soon-to-be husband. You don't have a job or substantial income and live on state benefits. The courts need some kind of reassurance that there will be financial support for your daughter once she's out of the UK, so they're asking your fiance -- her soon-to-be stepfather, the person she'll be living with and who will be her financial sponsor anyway -- to provide this evidence.

Frankly, I think it is every bit the interest of the court that your fiance be able to provide this evidence. Assuming you and your daughter make it to the States, you won't be living on your own or making your own way -- you'll be living with your fiance (and eventual husband), and his income will be paying for both of your expenses because you won't be able to work right away anyway. If that were my child, I'd definitely want to make sure that the man who was becoming her stepfather in another country would be financially stable enough to provide for her. The obvious alternative is for your fiance to move to the UK.

~ Jenney

BritGuyTN

It was rude and pointless in your mind, but can you conceive that the poster was offended him/herself by the attitude of the OP?

Many people I know are annoyed and pissed off by people who have a sense of entitlement and live off the state if they are quite capable, but too lazy to work

The OP personally pissed me off with her statement. in my mind its her being rude and offensive to people who work hard and pay taxes

AmerLisa

I must reiterate, again, you don't know what circumstances she's in. I didn't take it that she was flounting around and living her life in extreme luxury. I think she is doing what is best. And yes I've heard that working, especially at a low paying job, with a child to support can be more detrimental than living off of benefits. Does that make her a bad person? I don't know, but certainly we don't have the right to judge her.

BritGuyTN

all i'm going on is this:

AmerLisa

That tells me that she's better off receiving benefits than going out to work - it does happen.

BritGuyTN

it clearly says she would be no better off - not worse off?

worse I can understand, but if someone could pretty much break even then they need to be working and not being a lazy sponger

believe me, I know enough of them - I've called out my brother in law and his white trash girlfriend for being perfectly health and being a lazy SOB's who won't get off their arse's and get a job.

Social security benefits are designed to be a saftey net to help with short term issues and for more long term issues like disabilities - they are not designed for people who just can't be bothered to work. I would have thought that most people who work for a living and pay income and SS tax would resent this attitude of entitlement and laziness.

AmerLisa

I do resent the people who sponge off of benefits. However, we don't know her whole story - really, do we? You, nor I, know her circumstances. You do know your brother and his girlfriend - bit of a different case there.