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-   -   British Mother with dual nationality child custody rights if in the USA? (https://britishexpats.com/forum/usa-57/british-mother-dual-nationality-child-custody-rights-if-usa-406524/)

loopsta29 Nov 7th 2006 1:03 am

British Mother with dual nationality child custody rights if in the USA?
 
Hi, I am a British US Resident living in the states, I am trying to find out my rights, my US born citizen husband and I are no longer getting along, we have been married for 3 years and after his recent indiscretions I can no longer live with him, let alone in this country, however I have no family here and he has a lot so I am afraid he will try and take my child away from me, either through a lawyer as I am only a resident or his family will just take my child.

Please if anyone has any advice about my rights I would be ever so grateful. :(

sambuc Nov 7th 2006 1:10 am

Re: British Mother with dual nationality child custody rights if in the USA?
 

Originally Posted by loopsta29
Hi, I am a British US Resident living in the states, I am trying to find out my rights, my US born citizen husband and I are no longer getting along, we have been married for 3 years and after his recent indiscretions I can no longer live with him, let alone in this country, however I have no family here and he has a lot so I am afraid he will try and take my child away from me, either through a lawyer as I am only a resident or his family will just take my child.

Please if anyone has any advice about my rights I would be ever so grateful. :(



Oh dear sounds like a horrible situation. Poor you.

No expert on this, and would suggest you go see a lawyer.

Is the child both of yours? Was the child born in the US? The way you word it, it sounds as if its only yours. If that is the case then he cannot take your child away as he would have no parental rights.

If the child is both of yours then you will definitely need to talk to a lawyer as I believe that you would be unable to take the child abroad without his concent.

Elvira Nov 7th 2006 1:11 am

Re: British Mother with dual nationality child custody rights if in the USA?
 

Originally Posted by loopsta29
Hi, I am a British US Resident living in the states, I am trying to find out my rights, my US born citizen husband and I are no longer getting along, we have been married for 3 years and after his recent indiscretions I can no longer live with him, let alone in this country, however I have no family here and he has a lot so I am afraid he will try and take my child away from me, either through a lawyer as I am only a resident or his family will just take my child.

Please if anyone has any advice about my rights I would be ever so grateful. :(


You are confusing me: do you have dual nationality, or are you merely a lawful resident? If the latter, is your residency conditional or permanent?

If the latter, and you get divorced, you can file for removal of conditions on your own.

I do not think that you being British in itself will affect the custody decision. However, it is probably highly unlikely that you would be allowed to take the child out of the country.

Probably time to see an experienced divorce/family attorney.

loopsta29 Nov 7th 2006 1:13 am

Re: British Mother with dual nationality child custody rights if in the USA?
 

Originally Posted by sambuc
Oh dear sounds like a horrible situation. Poor you.

No expert on this, and would suggest you go see a lawyer.

Is the child both of yours? Was the child born in the US? The way you word it, it sounds as if its only yours. If that is the case then he cannot take your child away as he would have no parental rights.

If the child is both of yours then you will definitely need to talk to a lawyer as I believe that you would be unable to take the child abroad without his concent.

Hi, yes the child is both of ours and he is getting VERY possessive (which is understandable) but it is his doing with regard to the break up.

I'm at my wits end with worry, trying to work to pay bills, but at the same time wondering if my son will still be there when I'm done, do you know of any good lawyers who specialize in this?

loopsta29 Nov 7th 2006 1:15 am

Re: British Mother with dual nationality child custody rights if in the USA?
 

Originally Posted by Elvira
You are confusing me: do you have dual nationality, or are you merely a lawful resident? If the latter, is your residency conditional or permanent?

If the latter, and you get divorced, you can file for removal of conditions on your own.

I do not think that you being British in itself will affect the custody decision. However, it is probably highly unlikely that you would be allowed to take the child out of the country.

Probably time to see an experienced divorce/family attorney.

I'm a lawful permanent resident, that is very worrying I would never see my british family again!

sambuc Nov 7th 2006 1:19 am

Re: British Mother with dual nationality child custody rights if in the USA?
 

Originally Posted by loopsta29
I'm a lawful permanent resident, that is very worrying I would never see my british family again!


You really do need to see an attorney, and the sooner the better. At least then you would know where you stand.

Sitting worrying about it isn't gonna help you or your son.

Where abouts in Phoenix are you??

Elvira Nov 7th 2006 1:20 am

Re: British Mother with dual nationality child custody rights if in the USA?
 

Originally Posted by loopsta29
I'm a lawful permanent resident, that is very worrying I would never see my british family again!


Why? There's nothing stopping you or them from visiting. However, you'll probably have to resign yourself to living in the US until your child is 16.

However, you really won't know what your options are until you have seen an attorney. Do you not have any friends who could recommend someone? Are there any charities in your state that might be able to help provide some initial information and advice?

(NB: protect your assets!)

loopsta29 Nov 7th 2006 1:24 am

Re: British Mother with dual nationality child custody rights if in the USA?
 

Originally Posted by Elvira
Why? There's nothing stopping you or them from visiting. However, you'll probably have to resign yourself to living in the US until your child is 16.

However, you really won't know what your options are until you have seen an attorney. Do you not have any friends who could recommend someone? Are there any charities in your state that might be able to help provide some initial information and advice?

(NB: protect your assets!)

Hi, thats a good question, no I don't have any friends another reason for separating, haven't been allowed any!

When you say protect your assets do you mean bank account and home?

Elvira Nov 7th 2006 1:27 am

Re: British Mother with dual nationality child custody rights if in the USA?
 

Originally Posted by loopsta29
Hi, thats a good question, no I don't have any friends another reason for separating, haven't been allowed any!

When you say protect your assets do you mean bank account and home?


Anything that's yours that he could get his hands on.

As for protecting joint assets, this is outside my realm, I'm afraid. But if you speak to your bank, they might be able to advise (I imagine your situation is not uncommon). I trust the house is in joint names?

But speak to a lawyer tomorrow. Most will provide an initial phone consultation for free.

There must be some woman's organization in your locality that could point you in the right direction.

Sally Nov 7th 2006 1:38 am

Re: British Mother with dual nationality child custody rights if in the USA?
 
It would be good if some family/friends from Britain could visit to give you that extra support.

loopsta29 Nov 7th 2006 1:39 am

Re: British Mother with dual nationality child custody rights if in the USA?
 

Originally Posted by Sally
It would be good if some family/friends from Britain could visit to give you that extra support.

I know, I asked they cant afford it!

Englishmum Nov 7th 2006 1:42 am

Re: British Mother with dual nationality child custody rights if in the USA?
 
You need to read up the information on the following link about international child custody disputes. It's the website of the British charity 'Reunite'.

It will show you what your rights and responsibilities are.

The US and the UK are both signatories to the Hague Convention. This means for example, that if you took your child to the UK without your husband's permission, the UK courts have to make an order to return the child back to the place where he/she is settled. In general terms, this means the place where the child resided in the previous 6-12 months or longer prior to being removed overseas.

My Aussie friend who lives here in NJ went through a nightmare this time last year when she split up with her ex; he returned to Oz, the children were visiting their maternal grandparents in Sydney and on the day their gran was checking in at the airport to fly back with them to Newark, they were detained by the Australian Federal Police and the immigration service. The ex had gone to a magistrate in Brisbane (on a Sunday morning!) to get an order to detain the children in Australia. She found an attorney listed on the 'Reunite' website practising in Brisbane, flew to Oz and managed to bring her children back to the States.

I urge you to thoroughly check out the website so you know what your rights and obligations are. Unfortunately in many States you are not even allowed to move to another US State if you want full or part-custody of your child.....

Have you kept a diary or made notes of your husband's behaviour? Perhaps it may help you in some way. Obviously if he's abusive you should go to a women's shelter.
I wish you all the best

http://www.reunite.org

loopsta29 Nov 7th 2006 2:27 am

Re: British Mother with dual nationality child custody rights if in the USA?
 

Originally Posted by Englishmum
You need to read up the information on the following link about international child custody disputes. It's the website of the British charity 'Reunite'.

It will show you what your rights and responsibilities are.

The US and the UK are both signatories to the Hague Convention. This means for example, that if you took your child to the UK without your husband's permission, the UK courts have to make an order to return the child back to the place where he/she is settled. In general terms, this means the place where the child resided in the previous 6-12 months or longer prior to being removed overseas.

My Aussie friend who lives here in NJ went through a nightmare this time last year when she split up with her ex; he returned to Oz, the children were visiting their maternal grandparents in Sydney and on the day their gran was checking in at the airport to fly back with them to Newark, they were detained by the Australian Federal Police and the immigration service. The ex had gone to a magistrate in Brisbane (on a Sunday morning!) to get an order to detain the children in Australia. She found an attorney listed on the 'Reunite' website practising in Brisbane, flew to Oz and managed to bring her children back to the States.

I urge you to thoroughly check out the website so you know what your rights and obligations are. Unfortunately in many States you are not even allowed to move to another US State if you want full or part-custody of your child.....

Have you kept a diary or made notes of your husband's behaviour? Perhaps it may help you in some way. Obviously if he's abusive you should go to a women's shelter.
I wish you all the best

http://www.reunite.org

Thank you so much for the information, that has answered a lot of my questions, I think the best bet is to keep it as amicable as possible and get his permission to take our son back to the UK to live.

Ray Nov 7th 2006 2:38 am

Re: British Mother with dual nationality child custody rights if in the USA?
 
Remember.. he signed a Form I-864, Affidavit of Support which will stay in effect until and if you leave permanently

Bob Nov 7th 2006 2:47 am

Re: British Mother with dual nationality child custody rights if in the USA?
 

Originally Posted by Ray
Remember.. he signed a Form I-864, Affidavit of Support which will stay in effect until and if you leave permanently

or become a US citizen, or die....so you can always fleece the bugger by claiming every benefit under the sun until he caves :D


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