candy wy.

it seems to be very rare in the uk to loose your life to domestic violence.
in america it seems to be pretty common.

englishnurse

i know over here you may get a bit of hassle ie your suits cut up or prawns behind your sofa
over there they shoot you!
ah well....

candy wy.

a bullet is cheaper then a divorce i guess

elfman

is this from personal experience?

snowbunny

Stella ain't called wife-beating beer for nothing.

On the other hand, there seems to be far, far less machoism about affairs and divorces. I've seen some pretty bitter and vengeful actions, but no murders. Yet on the OTHER hand, handguns are much, much harder to get and it takes much more planning to carry out such a deed.

In fact, premeditation is considered key in sentencing for murders in the US. Let's say the murderer claimed he was provoked by the boyfriend, and happened to be legally carrying a gun. It would have been his word against a dead man's, and so long as the murderer had owned and carried the gun for some period of time, it would not have been considered premeditated.

Go figure.

What's really horrifying is that this shit happens to *women* all the time -- they're usually the ones the ex-spouse/boyfriend goes after -- and no one seems to care nearly as much. But let a man go after a woman, or God forbid, a woman do a Lorena Bobbitt and it's front page news. Why?

James Box

Must applaud the court system for that one. Well played.

snowbunny

If someone wants you dead, there's no restraining order that's worth the paper it's printed on. Full riot gear and an automatic machine gun is the only thing that works -- ask the military.

candy wy.

restraining orders give people a false sense of security.

AlisonPA

Anyone who thinks that it doesn't happen in the UK is very naive indeed.
Apparently 2 women a week die in the UK as a result of domestic violence. Stabbing seems to be the method in a lot of cases.

DOMESTIC VIOLENCE

Pulaski

Uh? Why on earth not? I always lock the door, at least the "twist lock" on the handle, whether I am inside, or if I am going far enough away from the door (outside) that I can't see it for more than, say, one minute. If I am going out to work in the yard (mow, tend the vegetables, etc) then I lock the dead-bolt too. Where do I live? .... leafy suburbia.

Er, why haven't you changed the locks? American locks all seem to be interchangeable - all you need to buy is the handle and key mechanism, then switch it out leaving the bolt mechaism and end plates in place. It will cost you as little as $30, and, so log as you know the right end of a screw driver, take you about fifteen minutes.

doctor scrumpy

America is a more violent society than the UK, whether you like that fact or not, guns are widespread over here and whilst I agree guns don't kill people, people kill people etc... Sadly the wrong people seem to get guns.

dbark

I'm living in a small town (c.10K people). I know things can happen, I just don't want to live in fear all the time. I lived in inner London for 24 years and have relaxed back on some of the measures I used to use there, such as not leaving my car unlocked for a moment to pop back into my house for something, and always holding my handbag tightly to my body when in shops, streets etc. I was the victim of crimes there - mostly car crime. However, here things are somewhat different. Here I can leave planters on my porch and not have them stolen. The landscapers working in my yard leave their machinery by the road overnight and it's still there in the morning. Here I have not had my car forced open to steal my radio. I'm not saying it can't happen, I'm saying I'm not going to live every minute of every day in fear. Neither do I believe I've pissed anyone off enough to be in fear of attack.

Good point, Pulaski. If I was in the situation these people were in, changing the locks would be something I would do.

Steff

He was shot on the porch the first time though, then dragged inside and shot again

NC Penguin

What I'd like to know is if the ex-husband had the firearm legally and if that was the case why he was "allowed" to retain the weapon after "violating a domestic violence protective order" (taken from the BBC article)?

This is one of the problems about firearms ownership in the US. At the time of purchase, the individual may be an upstanding citizen but what about keeping check on his/her behaviors and propensity for violence (excluding life threatening self defence) after legally obtaining a deadly weapon?




NC Penguin

Just Jenney

My point is that the Brownin's comment implies that ALL Americans are as violent as this murderer, and I object to that generalization.

What if instead of saying, "Thats just crazy... Americans!" Brownin had instead said, "Thats just crazy... Men!" or "Thats just crazy... Hispanics!" (By his surname I'm assuming the murderer was Hispanic.)

Men are prone to violence more than women, but not ALL men are violent. A significant number of murders are done by Hispanics, but not ALL Hispanics are murderers. Do you see where I'm going with this?

As I said before, the first part of the comment -- "That's just crazy" -- is totally fine; in fact, I agree. It's the second part I object to. I don't appreciate being lumped into a gross generalization about murderers just because of my nationality, thank you very much.

~ Jenney