Englishman43

My family all live on Jersey so I was there - I'd forgotten what an easy life it is there - something I didn't like when I was younger , I wanted to get out in to the "real" world. Now that fact, that it's such an easy life there, is very appealing: low income tax, low sales tax, low gas prices & no dreaded health insurance !!

SultanOfSwing

Once or twice. Never really gets anywhere, or ends up in a row. Fun, eh?

heartofengland

I have to jump in here, usoruk. I also have a 13-year-old, along with 3 younger ones, and I'm in the same boat as you. Last night I went along to his high school orientation. The experience solidified it for me that the US is not where I want to be. Looking around I saw all the other parents with their13-year old children. Good grief, teenagers are so immature, aren't they? I didn't realize quite how immature they were until I saw them in a large group - backtalking their parents, texting during the speeches, giggling with their neighbors. My son also "mouths off" alot, hence the reason he currently has no cell phone, ipod, etc! I came to the realization that it's ludicrous to let him influence our decision to move over.

Also, the high school courses they were talking about were not so different from UK high school courses, apart from the huge emphasis on sports, of course. I think our kids will do well wherever they are, as long as we support them. Anyway, just my two cents.

SultanOfSwing

YES, a thousand times, yes. My son mouths off to me like I'm a piece of shit sometimes (doesn't help that I'm not his real father, of course) and then gets all taken back and acts all shit on when I put him up to the wall for it

I coach footie at U14, and I'm astounded at the level of immaturity of some boys in that 12-14 age range. Of course, I am lucky enough that most of the real immature players are on the other team in the region - for the most part the boys on my team are a delight, and score hat tricks left and right ...

I'm sure I was a right wee scote myself at that age, but I have trouble thinking I was that childish, but I suppose when the video games of the day take 15 minutes to load from a cassette tape, you do develop stronger concentration skills, and greater patience

SadInStates

Well yes, but more in terms of what's important to them at their current age...ie more school holidays throughout the year (instead of it all being saved up for 3 months of boredom), more freedom to go places by themselves/with friends without needing a ride, more options for higher education (college isn't necessarily the only/expected option as it seems to be here), more choices of courses/more depth of course content (compared to the Mickey Mouse course my eldest wants to do), more job options (compared to where we are in the states), and the big one..being able to drink at 18 as opposed to 21!!!!

But I'm preaching to the choir here!

Fish n Chips 56

You are preaching to the Choir for sure, I hope others are paying attention to the benefits that you have mentioned cos they are for real...

I'm constantly bothered as I have been for many years that most Americans want or expect their kids to go to college, I know a degree can get your child a nice career and lifestyle, but I think the cost is too far too high for many, to leave college being many thousands in debt and at the bottom of the ladder seems crazy to me...

I think trade schools are by far a smarter choice, you learn and focus on a real skill, for men electrical or plumbing for instance and make a great wage, you don't have near the expense that a college graduate has...

I think the cost of college is just another way to bleed parents, Id sooner give the kids that want to get into the medical field that chance at tax payers expense, with an agreement to work in the USA for 10-20 years...

This is just my opinion, I know others will disagree with me.

sallysimmons

This is a tough one for me. I definitely agree with you that college is too expensive for many families. OTOH, thanks to the old grant system in the UK, i was the only person in my family to go to college and it transformed my life. None of my cousins had the same opportunities as I had. I didn't gain a practical skill - I studied literature and art! - but my life has been so much better because of what I learned in those 3 years.

The unemployment rate among college graduates right now is below 4% - way lower than the national average. If every kid had that opportunity, our economy would be much better off.

But Fish, I'm also in agreement that college is out of reach for so many families. That's a crying shame.

Fish n Chips 56

Let me clarify, I don't dislike the idea of college, far from it, I'm all for education, I just hate that it costs so much money in this country and that means many kids cant attend, I think we are wasting talent because of that, kids that could do well may never get the opportunity...

Grants are great, sounds perfect to me, I hate that people leave college and have massive debt, we need and incentive to educate versus the heavy debt...

I see other countries investing highly in their education system and people, India comes to mind...

I like trade schools because they focus on a trade and that can make for a good life for some people...

sallysimmons

Amen! And Cameron is trying to take Britain the same way. If it had cost £9,000 a year when I was 18, I never would have gone to college.

usoruk

I totally agree with all of you all on everything!! I feel all I do is keep trying to convince my famaily the best things about the UK...my every other word seems to be "England"!! Sometimes I have to stop myself and live in reality, is it really better over there for the kids? Thanks Fish for your great insight as always...

English...yes there are lots for kids to do back home...just hope the Yankee kids want to do all those things!!!
My 13 yr old can't wait to move out and find a "shed"! for himself, away from his 3 younger siblings and the "worst parents in the world"!! and get a job at Game Stop to support himself!

His latest thing is, that he should be allowed to stay up til whatever hours and watch whatever and play on that bloomin! Xbox for forever!! because his friends' "cool American" parents allow them to!
We went into his school yesterday to talk to the principal on how to get him more assimilated into the school...his main friends are all in the other teams...I just could not believe, firstly the clothes the kids wear (off the shoulder numbers) and makeup and the pile of heavy folders the kids lug around. I remember a few text/exercise books back in my day, if only uniforms were in style! And once I had to visit the high school and the kids were pretty big..is that the American diet, but they all look like American footballers!!! No wonder my 13 yr old feels awkward he is tallish but quite slim!

Gab..can we really take the Xbox and all those awful war games to the UK because that would be a big deciding factor for my son! would they work over there?
I am walking on egg shells with him...and my hubby thinks it would be better to send him back to AZ and stay with my very well off sister in law, who he adores, for atleast 6 months..to get away from NJ, and the school and us I suppose, for a break. However, I do feel that he will just get more materialistic as his aunt does like to spoil her nieces and nephews..afterall she did start all this tech thing by buying my kids the gameboy, then the Wii plus all those games. But we gave in with the Xbox as he said all the rich kids had it in school and he could only fit in if he had one...But he is still the same!

I am just worried if we move back...will he get worse...are there more opportunities for kids to get in trouble back home, get in with the bad crowd etc as things are more streetwise there than over here. After all you really don't see gangs of hoodies in the 'burbs!

It does offer hope that there are so many of us who are going through the terrible teen stage or have been through it already and the advise is really uplifting.

Gabgoeshome

Hello...I wanted to send you a PM but can't?

usoruk

Gab...I don't know what PM is or how to set it up..not very technical!!!!! My 6 yr old is teaching me how to use my new phone!!!

Englishmum

There is a thread running in the USA forum about grocery shopping in the USA. I've made a few posts on it......


http://britishexpats.com/forum/showthread.php?t=745920

On page 4 of the thread I posted about the scary natural and artificial growth hormones and antibiotics being fed to poultry, cattle and added to milk (with links as to why these things in our food are dangerous).

These growth hormones and antibiotics are *banned* in Canada, Australia, New Zealand and all the EU countries and for milk treated with rBST - the USA is the only developed nation in the world which allows it

Sadly - all these hormones and antibiotics are in the cheapest food items in the US - no wonder you see so many obese people, and the poorest people on food stamps can only afford to buy this food - eventually making them sick. It's outrageous

usoruk

Not to mention all the GMO food here, I read somewhere that over 96% of US food is Genetically modified, especially soy and corn which is in everything...this all explains, the obesity levels starting so young...but govt. pharm. companies seem to allow all this.

I am pretty strict when it comes to what I buy and where I buy it, but difficult as the family is following the American route...thanks to my hubby enjoying the typical US foods, which I can't stand and very difficult as we live with the inlaws so if they make chicken by purdue/tyson then my kids and hubby eat it etc....

I miss so much of the food back home and the options. I loved going to the local farms to get eggs, lamb, quails etc...with my dad when I was younger....farmers markets here are expensive and does'nt it seem backward that there is not much natural/organics in mainstream supermarkets, except rip off whole foods. Alot more price competition in the UK shops in the organic range which keeps prices reasonable, I think...

SadInStates

So much of your post sounds familiar to me! One of my sons is 14 and lives for his x-box, and tries to stay up half the night playing it.

From what I can tell (being completely clueless about these sorts of things!) is that if you take the machine over, only games brought with him or purchased from the US will work on it. games bought in the UK won't be compatible.

As my eldest wants to keep the x-box here with him I've told mine it's probably easier to replace it with a newer one there, so he's happy!
What I haven't mentioned is how long it'll take to be able to afford to do that, or that we'll only be owning one family TV in the living room, as opposed to the dedicated x-box TV they share in the basement!