emailrob

We're finally on track and plan to move on June 19th.

We're going to Irvine / Mission / RSM areas of Orange County, CA.

I'm looking for tips and advice to help settle my wife in. We've two kids (3 and 6) but they'll be with her all summer until our eldest goes to school.

She's started looking at mom's meets, and other kids groups, but any other advice or experience (from the one who stays at home or goes to work!) would be great thanks

Rob

lisa67

Expect to be "home sick"..it will happen in some way or another, just be prepared. Try and get out of the house as much as possible (especially with 2 young kids and the long summer holiday ahead of you) Maybe join the local YMCA as they will probably have classes that the kids can join in and maybe a creche where she can leave the kids for an hour or so and have some time to herself. Buy some sort of satellite navigation system so she can program "home", go off exploring and get back without too much hassle.
Check your city's local rec. dept. for cheap family activities.
Be breave and send notes out to your neighbors and have a "here we are" BBQ to make friends, find babysitters, etc. etc.
I'm sure others will be along with other tips, but these are the things I could think of..hope they help !

Ray

She will moan whatever you do ..its inbred in them ...

lisa67

Morning Ray...glad to see you're your usual cheery self...got out of bed the wrong side ??

Ray

Just saying it.... as it is ......

lisa67

EnglishRose84

Hi Rob,

I've just moved to that area in Orange County two weeks ago and I'm settling in fine. There are quite a few of us BE trailing wives in that area - I've already met up with two last week who were so welcoming and friendly and have invited me to other meet ups etc so she can join us and will be fine! (if she wants someone to contact then PM me) I'm sure sambapink and runningbird will have plenty of great advice for her too!

I'm trying to keep myself busy, started driving yesterday - and now there is no stopping me! There is plenty to do in those areas and very family oriented places, so I have no doubt she will love it!

penguinsix

Driving is important. She should make sure she has her license and if not, work toward getting one as soon as possible. You might also want to budget for two cars if you are going to take one most of the day, trapping her in the house for the remainder.

dbj1000

Excellent advice, and probably the most important tip you'll get in this thread. Nothing else matters (book clubs, toddler groups, Tupperware parties and all those other 1950s-type suggestions you'll get from well-meaning strangers) if your wife can't actually get around.

sambapink

Hiya Rob.. It certainly can be difficult for 'the wife' thats staying at home... It can be hard to meet people.... But never fear... because as Englishrose said that are a few of us now in the area (we are in Mission Viejo).. Please give me a PM... I would be more than happy to have a chat with your wife about what to expect, and maybe arrange a meet with a few of us girlies after you arrive. You have to remember that your wife will feel very isolated and without her normal support network around her it can very very hard indeed. It does take some time.. but going into a move like this with a positive, upbeat attitiude makes things somewhat easier. Good Luck

Mandana

The first thing I'd suggest is make sure she is mobile - as someone else mentioned. Don't know what it's going to be like where you're moving, but if I hadn't had wheels from day 1, I would have been totally stuck.

Another thing I'd suggest is don't land on a Sunday night, arrive where you're staying, then go to work on the Monday morning and leave her with an empty kitchen, car keys, and no idea where to get provisions! On the other hand, I HAD to get out and find my way about, so it might be good to throw her in at the deep end!

Another thing is to ensure you all have great access to both the internet, and ability to phone home cheaply. We have a Tesco phone, Vonage and something else (which we've acquired here, and is free after a monthly fee). I can't ask what it is as he is on to his parents as we speak! Before that, he was on to his daughter for an hour - free of charge. We don't have a webcam (God forbid), but lots of people have said it's a life-saver being able to see family for real, rather than just in pictures.

Sat Nav is another thing that helped me enormously. Trying to read a map, driving on the wrong side of the road, in a country I didn't know with mad, crazy drivers would have been terrifying. At least I felt safe knowing I could always get home after exploring.

HTH

emailrob

Thanks for all the great replies.

We do plan to get two cars (I get a rental car for 60 days but she'll be taking me to work each day, so will have the freedom of the car). We've got a sat nav and CA maps on it, and thankfully my wife has been to the area three times already. So I guess we are fairly familar, but as mentioned above we expect to get homesick. I have my work network of people but during the day she'll have none of that.

We have a corporate appartment (basically a large hotel room with small kitchen and lounge) until our furniture arrives 6-8 weeks later.

Exciting times, nervous ones, but I think we're ready to do it at this time of our lives. We're both fairly young (32) and the kids are old enough to adjust. What's the worse that could happen

MsElui

we made the move to the us (ohio) in october and are in a similar situation (except kids just 1 and 3). We are having a great time and the advice above is great! Its exciting and overwhelming but an adventure at the same time!

JEM3110

My advise to you both would be to try and maintain a sense of humour! Get out there and meet as many Americans as you can, embrace this exciting, wonderful opportunity you have and make the most of it. Good luck with the move!

scrubbedexpat099

Give her money to go shopping.

Usually works.