Want to move from UK to USA to live with my Girlfriend
Nov 9th 2009, 10:30 pm
#31
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Nov 9th 2009, 10:39 pm
#33
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Thread Starter
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 34
Re: Want to move from UK to USA to live with my Girlfriend
Thank you have done now just have to wait said it could not determine it straight away so have to wait up to 72hrs *fingers crossed* so once it is determined what do i need to do next? Am sorry I am very new to all this and you have been extremely helpful.
Nov 9th 2009, 10:51 pm
#34
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Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 5
Re: Want to move from UK to USA to live with my Girlfriend
Great attitude "Girl Friend". If you bothered to actually read what people were taking the time to advise here, you would understand there is heart-felt sympathy *and* caution. That's all. To tell people to "shut your mouth" is very offensive (for Brits).
Anyway, the point is that 10's of 1000's of people just like you two FALL in love over the Internet, having never met. That's what people were trying to say, you are NOT alone. HOWEVER, to get married and plan to spend a life together after you haven't even met and think the advice is shit is pathetic. I was married 15 years to the wife I love when we moved here and even that WAS TOUGH. We made it, and have been married for over 25 years now. A change of life, culture, no work (10% + unemployment) will test even the die hard married for years couple!!! People whom have been married for YEARS, IN LOVE, are struggling. So, people are just trying to CAUTION you. If you are not going this without a GOOD deal of caution then shame on you. I wish you EVERY bit of success and hope you are the rare ones that make it BUT make no mistake, I don't care how much in LOVE you are now, do not think for one second and be NIAVE to think this is going to be a walk in the park.
That all said. Don't criticize, just absorb, listen, learn and succeed. We all succeed by learning, from ourselves or from others.
Anyway, the point is that 10's of 1000's of people just like you two FALL in love over the Internet, having never met. That's what people were trying to say, you are NOT alone. HOWEVER, to get married and plan to spend a life together after you haven't even met and think the advice is shit is pathetic. I was married 15 years to the wife I love when we moved here and even that WAS TOUGH. We made it, and have been married for over 25 years now. A change of life, culture, no work (10% + unemployment) will test even the die hard married for years couple!!! People whom have been married for YEARS, IN LOVE, are struggling. So, people are just trying to CAUTION you. If you are not going this without a GOOD deal of caution then shame on you. I wish you EVERY bit of success and hope you are the rare ones that make it BUT make no mistake, I don't care how much in LOVE you are now, do not think for one second and be NIAVE to think this is going to be a walk in the park.
That all said. Don't criticize, just absorb, listen, learn and succeed. We all succeed by learning, from ourselves or from others.
And yes I know it seems how people talk about falling in love so randomly and so lightly now, for us, that is not the case. Nothing between us has been taken lightly and things have already not been a walk in the park for us, nor do we ever expect it to be. We've actually been through quite a lot together and ONLY ever come out stronger in the end. We know this is the right thing for us, and we KNOW we will be one of the lucky ones that make it all the way, and I completely respect and appreciate everyone's SINCERE concerns.
I was not criticizing or speaking at ALL to the people who merely did mention some concern about "being cautious" but was purely speaking to those who seemed to be critizing us themselves. I never said giving sincere advice "is shit" as you say. I appreciate it, which is why I stated thank yous to the people who had helped us out.
And that's all I can say really. I truly am sorry you've misunderstood me. But hopefully that is all cleared up now.
And grats on you + your wife. Can't wait until we get that far
Nov 9th 2009, 10:54 pm
#35
Joined: Apr 2002
Posts: 35,082
Re: Want to move from UK to USA to live with my Girlfriend
There is no immediate hurry for marriage..
At the same time, marriage IS wanted on both parts. There is no rush, but it will be happening in due time. Because we are very much in love. And yes it might sound strange to most people considering technically we haven't met yet in person, but please when some of you have negative things to say about it, or tend to feel the need to belittle it, just because it doesn't make sense to you, please just keep your mouth shut about it. Just because you don't understand it, or just because it doesn't work for you, doesn't mean it doesn't work for us. There's a long story and a LOT of history behind the two of us, and yes we are very close and in love, and I'd be willing to bet very highly even more so than most people who ARE face to face. If you can't understand that, well I'm sorry. But putting your two cents in about how ridiculous it seems to you, is neither necessary or wanted, so please keep those comments to yourself.. thank you.
At the same time, marriage IS wanted on both parts. There is no rush, but it will be happening in due time. Because we are very much in love. And yes it might sound strange to most people considering technically we haven't met yet in person, but please when some of you have negative things to say about it, or tend to feel the need to belittle it, just because it doesn't make sense to you, please just keep your mouth shut about it. Just because you don't understand it, or just because it doesn't work for you, doesn't mean it doesn't work for us. There's a long story and a LOT of history behind the two of us, and yes we are very close and in love, and I'd be willing to bet very highly even more so than most people who ARE face to face. If you can't understand that, well I'm sorry. But putting your two cents in about how ridiculous it seems to you, is neither necessary or wanted, so please keep those comments to yourself.. thank you.
The only way your BF will be able to move to the US is through his family relationship with you. Therefore, marriage is definitely a part of it.
50%+ of the people replying to you here (quite generously with their knowledge, I'd add) are in culture-blended marriages. We happen to know a thing or two about it (and we're familiar with the internet). Many of us had long distance relationships for extended periods of time. Blowing people off from the get-go isn't a great way to get to your end goal.
Sticking 'thank you' on the end of bossing people around doesn't make it any softer.
I'm moving your thread to the Immigration forum where visa questions belong. There's a recent thread from another couple, which might be of interest to you here: http://britishexpats.com/forum/showthread.php?t=639575
Because it hasn't been spelled out clearly, and for both of you: It is illegal to come to the US as a visitor with the intention of staying, by marriage or other means. The consequences go as far as a lifetime ban from the US.
Please plan your visits sensibly and with an eye on the big picture. If it's as serious as you both say, it will all hold together.
Nov 9th 2009, 11:04 pm
#36
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Joined: Apr 2003
Location: Phoenix, Arizona
Posts: 58,679
Re: Want to move from UK to USA to live with my Girlfriend
Rene
Nov 9th 2009, 11:08 pm
#37
Forum Regular
Thread Starter
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 34
Re: Want to move from UK to USA to live with my Girlfriend
You've missed the point by a mile.
The only way your BF will be able to move to the US is through his family relationship with you. Therefore, marriage is definitely a part of it.
50%+ of the people replying to you here (quite generously with their knowledge, I'd add) are in culture-blended marriages. We happen to know a thing or two about it (and we're familiar with the internet). Many of us had long distance relationships for extended periods of time. Blowing people off from the get-go isn't a great way to get to your end goal.
Sticking 'thank you' on the end of bossing people around doesn't make it any softer.
I'm moving your thread to the Immigration forum where visa questions belong. There's a recent thread from another couple, which might be of interest to you here: http://britishexpats.com/forum/showthread.php?t=639575
Because it hasn't been spelled out clearly, and for both of you: It is illegal to come to the US as a visitor with the intention of staying, by marriage or other means. The consequences go as far as a lifetime ban from the US.
Please plan your visits sensibly and with an eye on the big picture. If it's as serious as you both say, it will all hold together.
The only way your BF will be able to move to the US is through his family relationship with you. Therefore, marriage is definitely a part of it.
50%+ of the people replying to you here (quite generously with their knowledge, I'd add) are in culture-blended marriages. We happen to know a thing or two about it (and we're familiar with the internet). Many of us had long distance relationships for extended periods of time. Blowing people off from the get-go isn't a great way to get to your end goal.
Sticking 'thank you' on the end of bossing people around doesn't make it any softer.
I'm moving your thread to the Immigration forum where visa questions belong. There's a recent thread from another couple, which might be of interest to you here: http://britishexpats.com/forum/showthread.php?t=639575
Because it hasn't been spelled out clearly, and for both of you: It is illegal to come to the US as a visitor with the intention of staying, by marriage or other means. The consequences go as far as a lifetime ban from the US.
Please plan your visits sensibly and with an eye on the big picture. If it's as serious as you both say, it will all hold together.
Nov 9th 2009, 11:14 pm
#38
Joined: Apr 2002
Posts: 35,082
Re: Want to move from UK to USA to live with my Girlfriend
Yes, go visit and meet in person (get proof of being in person together then.. photo in front of a newspaper is effective, if ugly)
Once you have met in person, the K-1 Fiance visa process can start; the USC partner initiates that (see the wiki entries here).
When step one is approved, you can apply for the visa. When the visa is approved and issued, then you can move to the US.
Everyone has to be divorced and free to move before you can start.
US citizen needs to be earning sufficient income to show she can support you.
UKC needs to pass a medical for physical/mental health and declare all arrests/convictions/cautions etc.
It seems very complex at first which is why everyone recommends taking it one step at a time first.
Meet the first requirement: meet in person. Start reading about the K-1 visa now so that you'll be comfortable with the new terminology when the time comes.
Not complex, just very involved and something most of us have only done the one time, so the benefit of others' experiences is very powerful.
Once you have met in person, the K-1 Fiance visa process can start; the USC partner initiates that (see the wiki entries here).
When step one is approved, you can apply for the visa. When the visa is approved and issued, then you can move to the US.
Everyone has to be divorced and free to move before you can start.
US citizen needs to be earning sufficient income to show she can support you.
UKC needs to pass a medical for physical/mental health and declare all arrests/convictions/cautions etc.
It seems very complex at first which is why everyone recommends taking it one step at a time first.
Meet the first requirement: meet in person. Start reading about the K-1 visa now so that you'll be comfortable with the new terminology when the time comes.
Not complex, just very involved and something most of us have only done the one time, so the benefit of others' experiences is very powerful.
Nov 9th 2009, 11:18 pm
#39
Just Joined
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 5
Re: Want to move from UK to USA to live with my Girlfriend
You've missed the point by a mile.
The only way your BF will be able to move to the US is through his family relationship with you. Therefore, marriage is definitely a part of it.
50%+ of the people replying to you here (quite generously with their knowledge, I'd add) are in culture-blended marriages. We happen to know a thing or two about it (and we're familiar with the internet). Many of us had long distance relationships for extended periods of time. Blowing people off from the get-go isn't a great way to get to your end goal.
Sticking 'thank you' on the end of bossing people around doesn't make it any softer.
I'm moving your thread to the Immigration forum where visa questions belong. There's a recent thread from another couple, which might be of interest to you here: http://britishexpats.com/forum/showthread.php?t=639575
Because it hasn't been spelled out clearly, and for both of you: It is illegal to come to the US as a visitor with the intention of staying, by marriage or other means. The consequences go as far as a lifetime ban from the US.
Please plan your visits sensibly and with an eye on the big picture. If it's as serious as you both say, it will all hold together.
The only way your BF will be able to move to the US is through his family relationship with you. Therefore, marriage is definitely a part of it.
50%+ of the people replying to you here (quite generously with their knowledge, I'd add) are in culture-blended marriages. We happen to know a thing or two about it (and we're familiar with the internet). Many of us had long distance relationships for extended periods of time. Blowing people off from the get-go isn't a great way to get to your end goal.
Sticking 'thank you' on the end of bossing people around doesn't make it any softer.
I'm moving your thread to the Immigration forum where visa questions belong. There's a recent thread from another couple, which might be of interest to you here: http://britishexpats.com/forum/showthread.php?t=639575
Because it hasn't been spelled out clearly, and for both of you: It is illegal to come to the US as a visitor with the intention of staying, by marriage or other means. The consequences go as far as a lifetime ban from the US.
Please plan your visits sensibly and with an eye on the big picture. If it's as serious as you both say, it will all hold together.
And I am aware that these people know what they're talking about, which is why I am, sincerely might I add, thaking them for it numerous times. And as you said, the only way he will be able to move here is through marrying me, which is what I'm trying to explain, we were not sure if that was the only/quickest way or not. We were unaware if there were other options. Noorah had asked why the rush to be married, and I was simply explaining to her there was no rush exactly, just that we were trying to see if there was an easier way for him to come here, and stay. Does that make sense? Of COURSE I want to marry him. She was just questioning why get married why not visit first etc. then proceed to get married if you still so wish. And I was just stating I was trying to see if there was another easier alternative. Her along with a few others have cleared up for me that there in fact is not, so that's that, and it helped loads. Thus, why I thanked them.
And yes, I was aware about it being illegal and possibly could end up causing a lifetime ban, which is why we decided to come on here and ask the question.. We just wanted to see if there were other options, perhaps easier and/or quicker than him having to visit, then go back, then starting the process, then coming back etc. Now that we've been informed a great deal, we've already started in the process for what we're going to do. Thanks.
Thanks again to everyone who has taken the time and given us helpful information. It means a lot to us!
Nov 9th 2009, 11:22 pm
#40
Just Joined
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 5
Re: Want to move from UK to USA to live with my Girlfriend
Yes, go visit and meet in person (get proof of being in person together then.. photo in front of a newspaper is effective, if ugly)
Once you have met in person, the K-1 Fiance visa process can start; the USC partner initiates that (see the wiki entries here).
When step one is approved, you can apply for the visa. When the visa is approved and issued, then you can move to the US.
Everyone has to be divorced and free to move before you can start.
US citizen needs to be earning sufficient income to show she can support you.
UKC needs to pass a medical for physical/mental health and declare all arrests/convictions/cautions etc.
It seems very complex at first which is why everyone recommends taking it one step at a time first.
Meet the first requirement: meet in person. Start reading about the K-1 visa now so that you'll be comfortable with the new terminology when the time comes.
Not complex, just very involved and something most of us have only done the one time, so the benefit of others' experiences is very powerful.
Once you have met in person, the K-1 Fiance visa process can start; the USC partner initiates that (see the wiki entries here).
When step one is approved, you can apply for the visa. When the visa is approved and issued, then you can move to the US.
Everyone has to be divorced and free to move before you can start.
US citizen needs to be earning sufficient income to show she can support you.
UKC needs to pass a medical for physical/mental health and declare all arrests/convictions/cautions etc.
It seems very complex at first which is why everyone recommends taking it one step at a time first.
Meet the first requirement: meet in person. Start reading about the K-1 visa now so that you'll be comfortable with the new terminology when the time comes.
Not complex, just very involved and something most of us have only done the one time, so the benefit of others' experiences is very powerful.
Nov 9th 2009, 11:30 pm
#41
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Mar 2007
Posts: 4,059
Re: Want to move from UK to USA to live with my Girlfriend
Au contraire... the reason many of us are urging patience and caution is precisely because marriage IS in your immediate future. If the two of you want to be together forever ASAP, that means getting married quickly and applying for an immigrant visa, or it means meeting soon and applying for a fiance visa. Once the K1 visa holder enters the US, he will have 90 days to get married. That is not really consistent with "no hurry, no rush, in due time". We all want you both to think very carefully before you start doing things that are difficult to undo. Good luck to both of you.
Nov 9th 2009, 11:33 pm
#42
Forum Regular
Thread Starter
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 34
Re: Want to move from UK to USA to live with my Girlfriend
Au contraire... the reason many of us are urging patience and caution is precisely because marriage IS in your immediate future. If the two of you want to be together forever ASAP, that means getting married quickly and applying for an immigrant visa, or it means meeting soon and applying for a fiance visa. Once the K1 visa holder enters the US, he will have 90 days to get married. That is not really consistent with "no hurry, no rush, in due time". We all want you both to think very carefully before you start doing things that are difficult to undo. Good luck to both of you.
Nov 9th 2009, 11:39 pm
#43
Just Joined
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 5
Re: Want to move from UK to USA to live with my Girlfriend
Au contraire... the reason many of us are urging patience and caution is precisely because marriage IS in your immediate future. If the two of you want to be together forever ASAP, that means getting married quickly and applying for an immigrant visa, or it means meeting soon and applying for a fiance visa. Once the K1 visa holder enters the US, he will have 90 days to get married. That is not really consistent with "no hurry, no rush, in due time". We all want you both to think very carefully before you start doing things that are difficult to undo. Good luck to both of you.
Nov 9th 2009, 11:48 pm
#44
Joined: Apr 2002
Posts: 35,082
Re: Want to move from UK to USA to live with my Girlfriend
Yes, give or take either way. That's from the first step (petition I-129f) to visa in hand.
Currently, cases are completing in closer to 6 months, details depending. It's always best to plan for the longer date, Murphy's (Sod's) Law & all...
Looks like I should have put this straight into the marriage based visa forum afterall. Buckle your seatbelts everyone....
Currently, cases are completing in closer to 6 months, details depending. It's always best to plan for the longer date, Murphy's (Sod's) Law & all...
Looks like I should have put this straight into the marriage based visa forum afterall. Buckle your seatbelts everyone....
Nov 10th 2009, 12:29 am
#45
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Joined: Nov 2008
Location: Quebec, Canada
Posts: 976
Re: Want to move from UK to USA to live with my Girlfriend
Are you prepared to move to the UK to be with him if he is denied a visa? The answer to that question is a good indication on how strong your relationship is. You do not have to answer the question publicly, but you do need to give yourself an honest answer.
Good luck to you both!
Good luck to you both!