UK Citizen Needing Some AOS/Amnesty/Marriage Advice
Aug 27th 2003, 1:26 am
#1
Guest
Posts: n/a
UK Citizen Needing Some AOS/Amnesty/Marriage Advice
Hi Well this is my first time posting to this group and hopefully
there are people that will be able to offer me good solid advise.
I am a british citizen who came to the US 6 years ago in order to
visit the father of my then two children. I came on a visa waiver and
to cut a long story short I never went back to the UK. Had a third
child within 9 months of stepping in the country and split up with the
american father in 2000. He never married me legally and this was
never on the table.
I didnt go back because I know that the children would never see their
father again if I did. He wanted me to leave the kids and leave but I
knew that a 10 ban would be activated and the thought of not being
able to see my children for at least ten years was too much to bear.
So I overstayed. I was fortunate enough to find people that took pity
on me(So to speak) and sent me money in order to help me live. I never
worked under the table albeit some cleaning jobs because I was scared
to mess up any potential opportunity to rectify my situation. I missed
the last amnesty and here I am out of status in the US with three
dependant children. My childrens father knows the situation ..he gives
me $200 in child support for the three children and he does see them.
We live about 10 minutes away from eachother.
Now I have met someone who wants to marry me. He wanted to marry me
from the start. I didnt want to play any games so I told him about my
situation. He is willing to marry me and file for me. I have a pretty
good grip on how it is all done but still I hesitate. Having been in
a relationship with childrens father for 7 yrs from the age of 19..I
know that relationships can break down. My fear is t hat I marry this
guy, file my papers become known to the immigration and then it all
falls to pieces.He gets mad at me when I say this but I think I am
being realistic. I dont want 6 yrs of living here undercover to be
ruined by marrying someone and then that failing then BCIS deport me
for whatever reason. I wanted to hold out for an amnesty program from
the government but that does not seem like its going to happen.
I am getting to the point of all of this if you hang on
The other thing is I live in Chicago and he lives in Rochester, NY. I
want to move to NYC(I have people I can stay with) Will I be able to
marry him and file my papers with us living in two separate places?
The plan is for him to eventually be in NYC too. He lives with his
parents after a messy divorce left him penniless.
Where would we file? NYC or Albany?
If it took longer than we thought and I was in NYC for a year before
he could join me would that affect us with the AOS interview when that
occured?
If our marriage failed...would I be able to self petition? Would that
make it harder for me by not living in the same place initially?
Would I be able to file as as a spouse and then drop that application
to self file if an amnesty came up?
The reason I ask is that he says if we did split up then he would
divorce me and not allow the process to continue. I feel that there is
a risk there. I know that a relationship may fail but the AOL process
rolls on. I feel that to marry someone who loves me but wont let my
s*** continue is a stupid thing to do. Maybe the whole situation is
unnatural.
I really need some serious advise from people who may have gone
through this and those who have had sponsering spouses drop their
applications.
I am really confused as to what I should do. Really I wish I could
just see him and live with him without marrying him to avoid all of
this but he doesnt make enough money to support the both of us. I
would need to be working when with him in any event and I dont have an
EAD or SSN#
Please Help Someone!!
there are people that will be able to offer me good solid advise.
I am a british citizen who came to the US 6 years ago in order to
visit the father of my then two children. I came on a visa waiver and
to cut a long story short I never went back to the UK. Had a third
child within 9 months of stepping in the country and split up with the
american father in 2000. He never married me legally and this was
never on the table.
I didnt go back because I know that the children would never see their
father again if I did. He wanted me to leave the kids and leave but I
knew that a 10 ban would be activated and the thought of not being
able to see my children for at least ten years was too much to bear.
So I overstayed. I was fortunate enough to find people that took pity
on me(So to speak) and sent me money in order to help me live. I never
worked under the table albeit some cleaning jobs because I was scared
to mess up any potential opportunity to rectify my situation. I missed
the last amnesty and here I am out of status in the US with three
dependant children. My childrens father knows the situation ..he gives
me $200 in child support for the three children and he does see them.
We live about 10 minutes away from eachother.
Now I have met someone who wants to marry me. He wanted to marry me
from the start. I didnt want to play any games so I told him about my
situation. He is willing to marry me and file for me. I have a pretty
good grip on how it is all done but still I hesitate. Having been in
a relationship with childrens father for 7 yrs from the age of 19..I
know that relationships can break down. My fear is t hat I marry this
guy, file my papers become known to the immigration and then it all
falls to pieces.He gets mad at me when I say this but I think I am
being realistic. I dont want 6 yrs of living here undercover to be
ruined by marrying someone and then that failing then BCIS deport me
for whatever reason. I wanted to hold out for an amnesty program from
the government but that does not seem like its going to happen.
I am getting to the point of all of this if you hang on
The other thing is I live in Chicago and he lives in Rochester, NY. I
want to move to NYC(I have people I can stay with) Will I be able to
marry him and file my papers with us living in two separate places?
The plan is for him to eventually be in NYC too. He lives with his
parents after a messy divorce left him penniless.
Where would we file? NYC or Albany?
If it took longer than we thought and I was in NYC for a year before
he could join me would that affect us with the AOS interview when that
occured?
If our marriage failed...would I be able to self petition? Would that
make it harder for me by not living in the same place initially?
Would I be able to file as as a spouse and then drop that application
to self file if an amnesty came up?
The reason I ask is that he says if we did split up then he would
divorce me and not allow the process to continue. I feel that there is
a risk there. I know that a relationship may fail but the AOL process
rolls on. I feel that to marry someone who loves me but wont let my
s*** continue is a stupid thing to do. Maybe the whole situation is
unnatural.
I really need some serious advise from people who may have gone
through this and those who have had sponsering spouses drop their
applications.
I am really confused as to what I should do. Really I wish I could
just see him and live with him without marrying him to avoid all of
this but he doesnt make enough money to support the both of us. I
would need to be working when with him in any event and I dont have an
EAD or SSN#
Please Help Someone!!
Aug 27th 2003, 1:37 am
#2
Concierge
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 46,473
Re: UK Citizen Needing Some AOS/Amnesty/Marriage Advice
Yes you can marry and file for AOS. The overstay will not be an issue, IMHO, unless you leave the US which you know not to do.
One very loud piece of advice, move to Rochester and deal with the BCIS in Albany. DO NOT USE THE NYC BCIS. The wait time for the adjustment of status for NYC is over two years. If you use the Albany BCIS, you can file in person, walk out the same day with the EAD (employment authorization card), and be finished with adjustment within 6 to 8 months. Stay in the Rochester area until the final interview. Believe me, you do not want to have to deal with the long wait and inefficiency of the NYC BCIS when you can do it quickly and almost painlessly.
You can get an overview of what to file at www.k1.exit.com. Accept the disclaimer and go to tourist adjustment.
Rete
One very loud piece of advice, move to Rochester and deal with the BCIS in Albany. DO NOT USE THE NYC BCIS. The wait time for the adjustment of status for NYC is over two years. If you use the Albany BCIS, you can file in person, walk out the same day with the EAD (employment authorization card), and be finished with adjustment within 6 to 8 months. Stay in the Rochester area until the final interview. Believe me, you do not want to have to deal with the long wait and inefficiency of the NYC BCIS when you can do it quickly and almost painlessly.
You can get an overview of what to file at www.k1.exit.com. Accept the disclaimer and go to tourist adjustment.
Rete
Originally posted by Mystikal Lady
Hi Well this is my first time posting to this group and hopefully
there are people that will be able to offer me good solid advise.
I am a british citizen who came to the US 6 years ago in order to
visit the father of my then two children. I came on a visa waiver and
to cut a long story short I never went back to the UK. Had a third
child within 9 months of stepping in the country and split up with the
american father in 2000. He never married me legally and this was
never on the table.
I didnt go back because I know that the children would never see their
father again if I did. He wanted me to leave the kids and leave but I
knew that a 10 ban would be activated and the thought of not being
able to see my children for at least ten years was too much to bear.
So I overstayed. I was fortunate enough to find people that took pity
on me(So to speak) and sent me money in order to help me live. I never
worked under the table albeit some cleaning jobs because I was scared
to mess up any potential opportunity to rectify my situation. I missed
the last amnesty and here I am out of status in the US with three
dependant children. My childrens father knows the situation ..he gives
me $200 in child support for the three children and he does see them.
We live about 10 minutes away from eachother.
Now I have met someone who wants to marry me. He wanted to marry me
from the start. I didnt want to play any games so I told him about my
situation. He is willing to marry me and file for me. I have a pretty
good grip on how it is all done but still I hesitate. Having been in
a relationship with childrens father for 7 yrs from the age of 19..I
know that relationships can break down. My fear is t hat I marry this
guy, file my papers become known to the immigration and then it all
falls to pieces.He gets mad at me when I say this but I think I am
being realistic. I dont want 6 yrs of living here undercover to be
ruined by marrying someone and then that failing then BCIS deport me
for whatever reason. I wanted to hold out for an amnesty program from
the government but that does not seem like its going to happen.
I am getting to the point of all of this if you hang on
The other thing is I live in Chicago and he lives in Rochester, NY. I
want to move to NYC(I have people I can stay with) Will I be able to
marry him and file my papers with us living in two separate places?
The plan is for him to eventually be in NYC too. He lives with his
parents after a messy divorce left him penniless.
Where would we file? NYC or Albany?
If it took longer than we thought and I was in NYC for a year before
he could join me would that affect us with the AOS interview when that
occured?
If our marriage failed...would I be able to self petition? Would that
make it harder for me by not living in the same place initially?
Would I be able to file as as a spouse and then drop that application
to self file if an amnesty came up?
The reason I ask is that he says if we did split up then he would
divorce me and not allow the process to continue. I feel that there is
a risk there. I know that a relationship may fail but the AOL process
rolls on. I feel that to marry someone who loves me but wont let my
s*** continue is a stupid thing to do. Maybe the whole situation is
unnatural.
I really need some serious advise from people who may have gone
through this and those who have had sponsering spouses drop their
applications.
I am really confused as to what I should do. Really I wish I could
just see him and live with him without marrying him to avoid all of
this but he doesnt make enough money to support the both of us. I
would need to be working when with him in any event and I dont have an
EAD or SSN#
Please Help Someone!!
Hi Well this is my first time posting to this group and hopefully
there are people that will be able to offer me good solid advise.
I am a british citizen who came to the US 6 years ago in order to
visit the father of my then two children. I came on a visa waiver and
to cut a long story short I never went back to the UK. Had a third
child within 9 months of stepping in the country and split up with the
american father in 2000. He never married me legally and this was
never on the table.
I didnt go back because I know that the children would never see their
father again if I did. He wanted me to leave the kids and leave but I
knew that a 10 ban would be activated and the thought of not being
able to see my children for at least ten years was too much to bear.
So I overstayed. I was fortunate enough to find people that took pity
on me(So to speak) and sent me money in order to help me live. I never
worked under the table albeit some cleaning jobs because I was scared
to mess up any potential opportunity to rectify my situation. I missed
the last amnesty and here I am out of status in the US with three
dependant children. My childrens father knows the situation ..he gives
me $200 in child support for the three children and he does see them.
We live about 10 minutes away from eachother.
Now I have met someone who wants to marry me. He wanted to marry me
from the start. I didnt want to play any games so I told him about my
situation. He is willing to marry me and file for me. I have a pretty
good grip on how it is all done but still I hesitate. Having been in
a relationship with childrens father for 7 yrs from the age of 19..I
know that relationships can break down. My fear is t hat I marry this
guy, file my papers become known to the immigration and then it all
falls to pieces.He gets mad at me when I say this but I think I am
being realistic. I dont want 6 yrs of living here undercover to be
ruined by marrying someone and then that failing then BCIS deport me
for whatever reason. I wanted to hold out for an amnesty program from
the government but that does not seem like its going to happen.
I am getting to the point of all of this if you hang on
The other thing is I live in Chicago and he lives in Rochester, NY. I
want to move to NYC(I have people I can stay with) Will I be able to
marry him and file my papers with us living in two separate places?
The plan is for him to eventually be in NYC too. He lives with his
parents after a messy divorce left him penniless.
Where would we file? NYC or Albany?
If it took longer than we thought and I was in NYC for a year before
he could join me would that affect us with the AOS interview when that
occured?
If our marriage failed...would I be able to self petition? Would that
make it harder for me by not living in the same place initially?
Would I be able to file as as a spouse and then drop that application
to self file if an amnesty came up?
The reason I ask is that he says if we did split up then he would
divorce me and not allow the process to continue. I feel that there is
a risk there. I know that a relationship may fail but the AOL process
rolls on. I feel that to marry someone who loves me but wont let my
s*** continue is a stupid thing to do. Maybe the whole situation is
unnatural.
I really need some serious advise from people who may have gone
through this and those who have had sponsering spouses drop their
applications.
I am really confused as to what I should do. Really I wish I could
just see him and live with him without marrying him to avoid all of
this but he doesnt make enough money to support the both of us. I
would need to be working when with him in any event and I dont have an
EAD or SSN#
Please Help Someone!!
Aug 27th 2003, 1:56 am
#3
former Rochesterian
Joined: Apr 2003
Location: Maryland / husband originally from England
Posts: 179
Re: UK Citizen Needing Some AOS/Amnesty/Marriage Advice
Originally posted by Rete
One very loud piece of advice, move to Rochester and deal with the BCIS in Albany. DO NOT USE THE NYC BCIS. The wait time for the adjustment of status for NYC is over two years. If you use
One very loud piece of advice, move to Rochester and deal with the BCIS in Albany. DO NOT USE THE NYC BCIS. The wait time for the adjustment of status for NYC is over two years. If you use
edited to add: Yes, just found it on the BCIS site. It says Buffalo is for:
"All of New York State with the exception of the following counties: Bronx, Kings (Brooklyn), New York City (Manhattan), Queens, Staten Island, Richmond, Nassau, Suffolk, Dutchess, Orange, Putnam, Rockland, Sullivan, Ulster, and Westchester."
(Rochester is in Monroe County.)
Last edited by katina; Aug 27th 2003 at 1:58 am.
Aug 27th 2003, 2:44 am
#4
Concierge
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 46,473
Re: UK Citizen Needing Some AOS/Amnesty/Marriage Advice
Originally posted by katina
I used to live in Rochester and I believe the office for that is Buffalo? (which sounds like a great office, btw)
edited to add: Yes, just found it on the BCIS site. It says Buffalo is for:
"All of New York State with the exception of the following counties: Bronx, Kings (Brooklyn), New York City (Manhattan), Queens, Staten Island, Richmond, Nassau, Suffolk, Dutchess, Orange, Putnam, Rockland, Sullivan, Ulster, and Westchester."
(Rochester is in Monroe County.)
I used to live in Rochester and I believe the office for that is Buffalo? (which sounds like a great office, btw)
edited to add: Yes, just found it on the BCIS site. It says Buffalo is for:
"All of New York State with the exception of the following counties: Bronx, Kings (Brooklyn), New York City (Manhattan), Queens, Staten Island, Richmond, Nassau, Suffolk, Dutchess, Orange, Putnam, Rockland, Sullivan, Ulster, and Westchester."
(Rochester is in Monroe County.)
LOL You are correct. However, how can it be all of NYS with the exception of those few counties? There is still Albany which does have jurisdiction over some counties in NYS.
From the BCIS website: Albany governs the following counties:
Service Area:
The Albany Sub Office serves the following counties in New York State: Albany, Broome, Chenango, Clinton, Columbia, Delaware, Essex, Franklin, Fulton, Greene, Hamilton, Herkimer, Madison, Montgomery, Oneida, Otsego, Rensselaer, Saint Lawrence, Saratoga, Schenectady, Schoharie, Tioga, Warren, and Washington
The area you quoted is under the jurisdiction of NYC BCIS ;-) I know this because I live in one of those counties.
Shall we start over for this lady?
She should file anywhere in NY State other than NYC. Buffalo is as good as Albany is, if not better. Same criteria there. File in person, walk out that day with an EAD, and if not, then you will be called to pick it up within 6 weeks. Total timeline for adjustment of status in either Buffalo or Albany is six to eight months. NYC still remains at over 2 years.
Rete
Aug 27th 2003, 4:34 am
#5
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Aug 2003
Location: Nevada b4 California b4 Colorado b4 Valley of plastic and sand, b4 London
Posts: 2,025
Re: UK Citizen Needing Some AOS/Amnesty/Marriage Advice
Originally posted by katina
I used to live in Rochester and I believe the office for that is Buffalo? (which sounds like a great office, btw)
edited to add: Yes, just found it on the BCIS site. It says Buffalo is for:
"All of New York State with the exception of the following counties: Bronx, Kings (Brooklyn), New York City (Manhattan), Queens, Staten Island, Richmond, Nassau, Suffolk, Dutchess, Orange, Putnam, Rockland, Sullivan, Ulster, and Westchester."
(Rochester is in Monroe County.)
I used to live in Rochester and I believe the office for that is Buffalo? (which sounds like a great office, btw)
edited to add: Yes, just found it on the BCIS site. It says Buffalo is for:
"All of New York State with the exception of the following counties: Bronx, Kings (Brooklyn), New York City (Manhattan), Queens, Staten Island, Richmond, Nassau, Suffolk, Dutchess, Orange, Putnam, Rockland, Sullivan, Ulster, and Westchester."
(Rochester is in Monroe County.)
Aug 27th 2003, 5:57 am
#6
former Rochesterian
Joined: Apr 2003
Location: Maryland / husband originally from England
Posts: 179
Re: UK Citizen Needing Some AOS/Amnesty/Marriage Advice
Originally posted by veryfunny
I just read your timeline and thanks for sharing it because I am being worn out by waiting for us to be approved by the INS.
I just read your timeline and thanks for sharing it because I am being worn out by waiting for us to be approved by the INS.
Aug 27th 2003, 6:01 am
#7
former Rochesterian
Joined: Apr 2003
Location: Maryland / husband originally from England
Posts: 179
Re: UK Citizen Needing Some AOS/Amnesty/Marriage Advice
Originally posted by Rete
LOL You are correct. However, how can it be all of NYS with the exception of those few counties? There is still Albany which does have jurisdiction over some counties in NYS.
From the BCIS website: Albany governs the following counties:
Service Area:
The Albany Sub Office serves the following counties in New York State: Albany, Broome, Chenango, Clinton, Columbia, Delaware, Essex, Franklin, Fulton, Greene, Hamilton, Herkimer, Madison, Montgomery, Oneida, Otsego, Rensselaer, Saint Lawrence, Saratoga, Schenectady, Schoharie, Tioga, Warren, and Washington
The area you quoted is under the jurisdiction of NYC BCIS ;-) I know this because I live in one of those counties.
Shall we start over for this lady?
She should file anywhere in NY State other than NYC. Buffalo is as good as Albany is, if not better. Same criteria there. File in person, walk out that day with an EAD, and if not, then you will be called to pick it up within 6 weeks. Total timeline for adjustment of status in either Buffalo or Albany is six to eight months. NYC still remains at over 2 years.
Rete
LOL You are correct. However, how can it be all of NYS with the exception of those few counties? There is still Albany which does have jurisdiction over some counties in NYS.
From the BCIS website: Albany governs the following counties:
Service Area:
The Albany Sub Office serves the following counties in New York State: Albany, Broome, Chenango, Clinton, Columbia, Delaware, Essex, Franklin, Fulton, Greene, Hamilton, Herkimer, Madison, Montgomery, Oneida, Otsego, Rensselaer, Saint Lawrence, Saratoga, Schenectady, Schoharie, Tioga, Warren, and Washington
The area you quoted is under the jurisdiction of NYC BCIS ;-) I know this because I live in one of those counties.
Shall we start over for this lady?
She should file anywhere in NY State other than NYC. Buffalo is as good as Albany is, if not better. Same criteria there. File in person, walk out that day with an EAD, and if not, then you will be called to pick it up within 6 weeks. Total timeline for adjustment of status in either Buffalo or Albany is six to eight months. NYC still remains at over 2 years.
Rete
Unless I'm just missing something!
Aug 27th 2003, 11:03 am
#8
Guest
Posts: n/a
Re: UK Citizen Needing Some AOS/Amnesty/Marriage Advice
For USC men who will not marry the mother of their children, there does not
seem to be any way to avoid the type of dilemma that you are in.
There are quite a few people on this list who have gotten married to a USC
and were then allowed to adjust status with few problems even with
overstays. However, there is no guarantee that this will work. I don't know
if anyone but a lawyer for your service area would feel comfortable giving
advice about something that would have such a major impact. (My Canadian
husband was given a "voluntary departure" notice a few days after we got
married, and he has not been allowed back in the country while they are
processing his visa (separation time is now 17 months with probably another
4 to go.(We had not filed for the adjustment immediately after the
marriage.))
It sounds like you may have an additional problem. It sounds as if your
current boyfriend cannot be your economic sponsor. Also, technically, once
you file for your K-3 visa you may still have a 9 month wait before you are
allowed to work. Do you have someone who can be your economic sponsor?
It sounds like you have 100% custody of the kids and would be allowed to
take them with you if you did have to leave the country. It seems to me that
the father should be bearing the consequences of a separation from the kids,
as it was his unwillingness to marry you and sponsor you that caused this
problem.
I don't know the details of the personalities, and current marriage status
of the father, but families have often been kept together "only for the
kids." The father has been a major cause of this problem, and perhaps he
should now be part of solving it if he wants to continue to see his
children. Does he have the funds to at least be your economic sponsor?
Madelon
"Mystikal Lady" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
> Hi Well this is my first time posting to this group and hopefully
> there are people that will be able to offer me good solid advise.
> I am a british citizen who came to the US 6 years ago in order to
> visit the father of my then two children. I came on a visa waiver and
> to cut a long story short I never went back to the UK. Had a third
> child within 9 months of stepping in the country and split up with the
> american father in 2000. He never married me legally and this was
> never on the table.
> I didnt go back because I know that the children would never see their
> father again if I did. He wanted me to leave the kids and leave but I
> knew that a 10 ban would be activated and the thought of not being
> able to see my children for at least ten years was too much to bear.
> So I overstayed. I was fortunate enough to find people that took pity
> on me(So to speak) and sent me money in order to help me live. I never
> worked under the table albeit some cleaning jobs because I was scared
> to mess up any potential opportunity to rectify my situation. I missed
> the last amnesty and here I am out of status in the US with three
> dependant children. My childrens father knows the situation ..he gives
> me $200 in child support for the three children and he does see them.
> We live about 10 minutes away from eachother.
> Now I have met someone who wants to marry me. He wanted to marry me
> from the start. I didnt want to play any games so I told him about my
> situation. He is willing to marry me and file for me. I have a pretty
> good grip on how it is all done but still I hesitate. Having been in
> a relationship with childrens father for 7 yrs from the age of 19..I
> know that relationships can break down. My fear is t hat I marry this
> guy, file my papers become known to the immigration and then it all
> falls to pieces.He gets mad at me when I say this but I think I am
> being realistic. I dont want 6 yrs of living here undercover to be
> ruined by marrying someone and then that failing then BCIS deport me
> for whatever reason. I wanted to hold out for an amnesty program from
> the government but that does not seem like its going to happen.
> I am getting to the point of all of this if you hang on
> The other thing is I live in Chicago and he lives in Rochester, NY. I
> want to move to NYC(I have people I can stay with) Will I be able to
> marry him and file my papers with us living in two separate places?
> The plan is for him to eventually be in NYC too. He lives with his
> parents after a messy divorce left him penniless.
> Where would we file? NYC or Albany?
> If it took longer than we thought and I was in NYC for a year before
> he could join me would that affect us with the AOS interview when that
> occured?
> If our marriage failed...would I be able to self petition? Would that
> make it harder for me by not living in the same place initially?
> Would I be able to file as as a spouse and then drop that application
> to self file if an amnesty came up?
> The reason I ask is that he says if we did split up then he would
> divorce me and not allow the process to continue. I feel that there is
> a risk there. I know that a relationship may fail but the AOL process
> rolls on. I feel that to marry someone who loves me but wont let my
> s*** continue is a stupid thing to do. Maybe the whole situation is
> unnatural.
> I really need some serious advise from people who may have gone
> through this and those who have had sponsering spouses drop their
> applications.
> I am really confused as to what I should do. Really I wish I could
> just see him and live with him without marrying him to avoid all of
> this but he doesnt make enough money to support the both of us. I
> would need to be working when with him in any event and I dont have an
> EAD or SSN#
> Please Help Someone!!
seem to be any way to avoid the type of dilemma that you are in.
There are quite a few people on this list who have gotten married to a USC
and were then allowed to adjust status with few problems even with
overstays. However, there is no guarantee that this will work. I don't know
if anyone but a lawyer for your service area would feel comfortable giving
advice about something that would have such a major impact. (My Canadian
husband was given a "voluntary departure" notice a few days after we got
married, and he has not been allowed back in the country while they are
processing his visa (separation time is now 17 months with probably another
4 to go.(We had not filed for the adjustment immediately after the
marriage.))
It sounds like you may have an additional problem. It sounds as if your
current boyfriend cannot be your economic sponsor. Also, technically, once
you file for your K-3 visa you may still have a 9 month wait before you are
allowed to work. Do you have someone who can be your economic sponsor?
It sounds like you have 100% custody of the kids and would be allowed to
take them with you if you did have to leave the country. It seems to me that
the father should be bearing the consequences of a separation from the kids,
as it was his unwillingness to marry you and sponsor you that caused this
problem.
I don't know the details of the personalities, and current marriage status
of the father, but families have often been kept together "only for the
kids." The father has been a major cause of this problem, and perhaps he
should now be part of solving it if he wants to continue to see his
children. Does he have the funds to at least be your economic sponsor?
Madelon
"Mystikal Lady" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
> Hi Well this is my first time posting to this group and hopefully
> there are people that will be able to offer me good solid advise.
> I am a british citizen who came to the US 6 years ago in order to
> visit the father of my then two children. I came on a visa waiver and
> to cut a long story short I never went back to the UK. Had a third
> child within 9 months of stepping in the country and split up with the
> american father in 2000. He never married me legally and this was
> never on the table.
> I didnt go back because I know that the children would never see their
> father again if I did. He wanted me to leave the kids and leave but I
> knew that a 10 ban would be activated and the thought of not being
> able to see my children for at least ten years was too much to bear.
> So I overstayed. I was fortunate enough to find people that took pity
> on me(So to speak) and sent me money in order to help me live. I never
> worked under the table albeit some cleaning jobs because I was scared
> to mess up any potential opportunity to rectify my situation. I missed
> the last amnesty and here I am out of status in the US with three
> dependant children. My childrens father knows the situation ..he gives
> me $200 in child support for the three children and he does see them.
> We live about 10 minutes away from eachother.
> Now I have met someone who wants to marry me. He wanted to marry me
> from the start. I didnt want to play any games so I told him about my
> situation. He is willing to marry me and file for me. I have a pretty
> good grip on how it is all done but still I hesitate. Having been in
> a relationship with childrens father for 7 yrs from the age of 19..I
> know that relationships can break down. My fear is t hat I marry this
> guy, file my papers become known to the immigration and then it all
> falls to pieces.He gets mad at me when I say this but I think I am
> being realistic. I dont want 6 yrs of living here undercover to be
> ruined by marrying someone and then that failing then BCIS deport me
> for whatever reason. I wanted to hold out for an amnesty program from
> the government but that does not seem like its going to happen.
> I am getting to the point of all of this if you hang on
> The other thing is I live in Chicago and he lives in Rochester, NY. I
> want to move to NYC(I have people I can stay with) Will I be able to
> marry him and file my papers with us living in two separate places?
> The plan is for him to eventually be in NYC too. He lives with his
> parents after a messy divorce left him penniless.
> Where would we file? NYC or Albany?
> If it took longer than we thought and I was in NYC for a year before
> he could join me would that affect us with the AOS interview when that
> occured?
> If our marriage failed...would I be able to self petition? Would that
> make it harder for me by not living in the same place initially?
> Would I be able to file as as a spouse and then drop that application
> to self file if an amnesty came up?
> The reason I ask is that he says if we did split up then he would
> divorce me and not allow the process to continue. I feel that there is
> a risk there. I know that a relationship may fail but the AOL process
> rolls on. I feel that to marry someone who loves me but wont let my
> s*** continue is a stupid thing to do. Maybe the whole situation is
> unnatural.
> I really need some serious advise from people who may have gone
> through this and those who have had sponsering spouses drop their
> applications.
> I am really confused as to what I should do. Really I wish I could
> just see him and live with him without marrying him to avoid all of
> this but he doesnt make enough money to support the both of us. I
> would need to be working when with him in any event and I dont have an
> EAD or SSN#
> Please Help Someone!!
Aug 27th 2003, 5:00 pm
#9
Guest
Posts: n/a
Re: UK Citizen Needing Some AOS/Amnesty/Marriage Advice
Madelon Mottet wrote:
>
> It sounds like you may have an additional problem. It sounds as if your
> current boyfriend cannot be your economic sponsor. Also, technically, once
> you file for your K-3 visa you may still have a 9 month wait before you are
> allowed to work. Do you have someone who can be your economic sponsor?
>
What K-3 visa?
If she got married, they would file I-130/I-485 in order for her to
adjust status. At the same time, she could apply for EAD.
One question:
Is the $200 per month (or is it $200 per week) in child support court
ordered or does the father just pay it out of the "kindness" of his
heart. If it is not a legal agreement, I encourage you to sue for
current and back child support if the amount is below the standard
amount you should be getting. Anything less may be shortchanging the
children.
>
> It sounds like you may have an additional problem. It sounds as if your
> current boyfriend cannot be your economic sponsor. Also, technically, once
> you file for your K-3 visa you may still have a 9 month wait before you are
> allowed to work. Do you have someone who can be your economic sponsor?
>
What K-3 visa?
If she got married, they would file I-130/I-485 in order for her to
adjust status. At the same time, she could apply for EAD.
One question:
Is the $200 per month (or is it $200 per week) in child support court
ordered or does the father just pay it out of the "kindness" of his
heart. If it is not a legal agreement, I encourage you to sue for
current and back child support if the amount is below the standard
amount you should be getting. Anything less may be shortchanging the
children.
Aug 28th 2003, 9:29 pm
#10
Guest
Posts: n/a
Re: UK Citizen Needing Some AOS/Amnesty/Marriage Advice
Hi All and thanks for the reassurence.
Yes I disregarded the advice about the K3.
As for the $200 thats per month and chronically below the 32% that
Illnois awards for Child Support. I want the children to live with him
in all actuality because he is economically able to take care of them
unlike me. If I do have the kids with me I will certainly file for
child support but I wasnt sure if my status was going to be a problem
and at the time not wishing to"rock the boat" I just accepted the
$200. Sad I know.
I will do a search for child support...maybe thats the best place for
me to start.
Thanks
> What K-3 visa?
> If she got married, they would file I-130/I-485 in order for her to
> adjust status. At the same time, she could apply for EAD.
>
> One question:
>
> Is the $200 per month (or is it $200 per week) in child support court
> ordered or does the father just pay it out of the "kindness" of his
> heart. If it is not a legal agreement, I encourage you to sue for
> current and back child support if the amount is below the standard
> amount you should be getting. Anything less may be shortchanging the
> children.
Yes I disregarded the advice about the K3.
As for the $200 thats per month and chronically below the 32% that
Illnois awards for Child Support. I want the children to live with him
in all actuality because he is economically able to take care of them
unlike me. If I do have the kids with me I will certainly file for
child support but I wasnt sure if my status was going to be a problem
and at the time not wishing to"rock the boat" I just accepted the
$200. Sad I know.
I will do a search for child support...maybe thats the best place for
me to start.
Thanks
> What K-3 visa?
> If she got married, they would file I-130/I-485 in order for her to
> adjust status. At the same time, she could apply for EAD.
>
> One question:
>
> Is the $200 per month (or is it $200 per week) in child support court
> ordered or does the father just pay it out of the "kindness" of his
> heart. If it is not a legal agreement, I encourage you to sue for
> current and back child support if the amount is below the standard
> amount you should be getting. Anything less may be shortchanging the
> children.
Aug 28th 2003, 9:33 pm
#11
Guest
Posts: n/a
Re: UK Citizen Needing Some AOS/Amnesty/Marriage Advice
Mystikal Lady wrote:
> Hi All and thanks for the reassurence.
> Yes I disregarded the advice about the K3.
>
> As for the $200 thats per month and chronically below the 32% that
> Illnois awards for Child Support. I want the children to live with him
> in all actuality because he is economically able to take care of them
> unlike me. If I do have the kids with me I will certainly file for
> child support but I wasnt sure if my status was going to be a problem
> and at the time not wishing to"rock the boat" I just accepted the
> $200. Sad I know.
> I will do a search for child support...maybe thats the best place for
> me to start.
> Thanks
Now I am confused. Are you saying he is pay you $200 per month for child
support and the kids live with him?
> Hi All and thanks for the reassurence.
> Yes I disregarded the advice about the K3.
>
> As for the $200 thats per month and chronically below the 32% that
> Illnois awards for Child Support. I want the children to live with him
> in all actuality because he is economically able to take care of them
> unlike me. If I do have the kids with me I will certainly file for
> child support but I wasnt sure if my status was going to be a problem
> and at the time not wishing to"rock the boat" I just accepted the
> $200. Sad I know.
> I will do a search for child support...maybe thats the best place for
> me to start.
> Thanks
Now I am confused. Are you saying he is pay you $200 per month for child
support and the kids live with him?
Aug 29th 2003, 6:17 pm
#12
Guest
Posts: n/a
Re: UK Citizen Needing Some AOS/Amnesty/Marriage Advice
The children reside with me. He gives me $200 for the three of them.
I want them to live with him because he is more stable then me.
I told him Id pay him $200 per month child support seeing as what he
gives me is such a kings ransom.But no joy
mrtravel <[email protected]> wrote in message news:<[email protected] m>...
> Mystikal Lady wrote:
> > Hi All and thanks for the reassurence.
> > Yes I disregarded the advice about the K3.
> >
> > As for the $200 thats per month and chronically below the 32% that
> > Illnois awards for Child Support. I want the children to live with him
> > in all actuality because he is economically able to take care of them
> > unlike me. If I do have the kids with me I will certainly file for
> > child support but I wasnt sure if my status was going to be a problem
> > and at the time not wishing to"rock the boat" I just accepted the
> > $200. Sad I know.
> > I will do a search for child support...maybe thats the best place for
> > me to start.
> > Thanks
>
> Now I am confused. Are you saying he is pay you $200 per month for child
> support and the kids live with him?
I want them to live with him because he is more stable then me.
I told him Id pay him $200 per month child support seeing as what he
gives me is such a kings ransom.But no joy
mrtravel <[email protected]> wrote in message news:<[email protected] m>...
> Mystikal Lady wrote:
> > Hi All and thanks for the reassurence.
> > Yes I disregarded the advice about the K3.
> >
> > As for the $200 thats per month and chronically below the 32% that
> > Illnois awards for Child Support. I want the children to live with him
> > in all actuality because he is economically able to take care of them
> > unlike me. If I do have the kids with me I will certainly file for
> > child support but I wasnt sure if my status was going to be a problem
> > and at the time not wishing to"rock the boat" I just accepted the
> > $200. Sad I know.
> > I will do a search for child support...maybe thats the best place for
> > me to start.
> > Thanks
>
> Now I am confused. Are you saying he is pay you $200 per month for child
> support and the kids live with him?
Aug 29th 2003, 6:29 pm
#13
Guest
Posts: n/a
Re: UK Citizen Needing Some AOS/Amnesty/Marriage Advice
Mystikal Lady wrote:
> The children reside with me. He gives me $200 for the three of them.
> I want them to live with him because he is more stable then me.
> I told him Id pay him $200 per month child support seeing as what he
> gives me is such a kings ransom.But no joy
If he is so stable then why is he only paying $200 per month in child
support. I would recommend you contact the local DCFS (or whatever it
is) office and get him to pay his fare share.
> The children reside with me. He gives me $200 for the three of them.
> I want them to live with him because he is more stable then me.
> I told him Id pay him $200 per month child support seeing as what he
> gives me is such a kings ransom.But no joy
If he is so stable then why is he only paying $200 per month in child
support. I would recommend you contact the local DCFS (or whatever it
is) office and get him to pay his fare share.
Aug 30th 2003, 2:13 pm
#14
Guest
Posts: n/a
Re: UK Citizen Needing Some AOS/Amnesty/Marriage Advice
>
> If he is so stable then why is he only paying $200 per month in child
> support. I would recommend you contact the local DCFS (or whatever it
> is) office and get him to pay his fare share.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Cause hes about control and having control over me and my life
basically. (Long Miserable Story)
Trust me he makes about 4g a month
I will do that
> If he is so stable then why is he only paying $200 per month in child
> support. I would recommend you contact the local DCFS (or whatever it
> is) office and get him to pay his fare share.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Cause hes about control and having control over me and my life
basically. (Long Miserable Story)
Trust me he makes about 4g a month
I will do that
