We've passed the two year mark!
Mar 15th 2009, 1:58 am
#1
A rather curious boy
Thread Starter
Joined: Aug 2006
Location: Melbourne
Posts: 5,917
We've passed the two year mark!
Hello All
Just back on the site after being away for a bit. BE seemed to be getting a bit silly and me, well I was just getting on with life.
I feel that I have had quite a journey over the last two years, with a fair balance of good and bad stuff, most of it emotional. I really feel for those that suffer a sense of loss when they do finally get to where they thought they wanted to be...been there.
I was not sure why we should come to Australia as we were pretty content at home, secure, good jobs and terrific friends and family. We knew that we were bored and wanted a change and truthfully I feel that I was heavily influenced by my husband and other people telling me how shit the UK was and if we could leave, we should. Shallow and ill-thought out...probably.
For those that know me and my story, cue massive chronic depression (if you are bored I am sure that you can find my six months and 1 year updates). Truthfully, for those that are struggling to make sense of their lives right now and might want to project two years forward, it might not be too bad an idea. I made it through with the support of my OH and a random bunch of in the flesh friends and BE buds that thought enough of me to keep me going.
Two years on, we still live in Melbourne. We have a large house, still the one child and now an Australian dog. We are probably better off here and better paid but I feel more insecure in terms of wealth, the future and my career. Emigrating when we did and the battle to re-establish ourselves has pretty much put paid to any thoughts of continuing to try for a much wanted second child. Lots of sadness about that.
My parents visit for two months every year nad my MIL and FIL will be trying for contributary visa status imminently. I have found friends, lost friends and drifted through friendships. It is hard here, people have established friendships and lives already and the friends and family you think will remain often don't. Conversely, you can become better friends with those you thought were mere aquaintances.
I do feel lonely and sometimes regret this journey but I feel that in the sense of a personal journey that continues, I have achieved more depth as a person for doing this than if I had remained at home. It is still hard. I work fulltime, have a long train journey and miss my son's growing but this is due to wanting to start where I left off at home. I look forward to a few months time where I can be settled enough to reduce my hours.
I enjoy living in Australia. I find a lack of hostility here and a hopefulness. I find people to be open, friendly and caring but not always mindful to keep in touch. The food is good, the supermarket choice could be better. I generally feel very safe except in the back of an terribly driven Melbourne taxi. Public transport is fair to middling at best. The Australian command of driving is not so great. The Yarra Valley until recently was a place to make your heart sing.
Northernbird, Casg and Carl, RugbyMatt, Aston and Sonly are a few of the many friends on here that have helped me through some dark days indeed. NB in particular gave me the advice that it's one day at a time and it is. (I'm off to sing along with my Lena Martell and Sidney Devine records as we speak). Last words on this are these - this is a forum, you have no idea how tough someone might be having it, so be kind if you can, it does not take a lot of effort and might mean a lot.
Just back on the site after being away for a bit. BE seemed to be getting a bit silly and me, well I was just getting on with life.
I feel that I have had quite a journey over the last two years, with a fair balance of good and bad stuff, most of it emotional. I really feel for those that suffer a sense of loss when they do finally get to where they thought they wanted to be...been there.
I was not sure why we should come to Australia as we were pretty content at home, secure, good jobs and terrific friends and family. We knew that we were bored and wanted a change and truthfully I feel that I was heavily influenced by my husband and other people telling me how shit the UK was and if we could leave, we should. Shallow and ill-thought out...probably.
For those that know me and my story, cue massive chronic depression (if you are bored I am sure that you can find my six months and 1 year updates). Truthfully, for those that are struggling to make sense of their lives right now and might want to project two years forward, it might not be too bad an idea. I made it through with the support of my OH and a random bunch of in the flesh friends and BE buds that thought enough of me to keep me going.
Two years on, we still live in Melbourne. We have a large house, still the one child and now an Australian dog. We are probably better off here and better paid but I feel more insecure in terms of wealth, the future and my career. Emigrating when we did and the battle to re-establish ourselves has pretty much put paid to any thoughts of continuing to try for a much wanted second child. Lots of sadness about that.
My parents visit for two months every year nad my MIL and FIL will be trying for contributary visa status imminently. I have found friends, lost friends and drifted through friendships. It is hard here, people have established friendships and lives already and the friends and family you think will remain often don't. Conversely, you can become better friends with those you thought were mere aquaintances.
I do feel lonely and sometimes regret this journey but I feel that in the sense of a personal journey that continues, I have achieved more depth as a person for doing this than if I had remained at home. It is still hard. I work fulltime, have a long train journey and miss my son's growing but this is due to wanting to start where I left off at home. I look forward to a few months time where I can be settled enough to reduce my hours.
I enjoy living in Australia. I find a lack of hostility here and a hopefulness. I find people to be open, friendly and caring but not always mindful to keep in touch. The food is good, the supermarket choice could be better. I generally feel very safe except in the back of an terribly driven Melbourne taxi. Public transport is fair to middling at best. The Australian command of driving is not so great. The Yarra Valley until recently was a place to make your heart sing.
Northernbird, Casg and Carl, RugbyMatt, Aston and Sonly are a few of the many friends on here that have helped me through some dark days indeed. NB in particular gave me the advice that it's one day at a time and it is. (I'm off to sing along with my Lena Martell and Sidney Devine records as we speak). Last words on this are these - this is a forum, you have no idea how tough someone might be having it, so be kind if you can, it does not take a lot of effort and might mean a lot.
Mar 15th 2009, 2:22 am
#2
A rather curious boy
Thread Starter
Joined: Aug 2006
Location: Melbourne
Posts: 5,917
Re: We've passed the two year mark!
PS should be 'we've past the two year mark' but you can't edit titles. Pah! That's going to annoy me.
Mar 15th 2009, 2:44 am
#3
Gutter Gob!!
Joined: Feb 2005
Location: Perth
Posts: 13,098
Re: We've passed the two year mark!
Hello All
Just back on the site after being away for a bit. BE seemed to be getting a bit silly and me, well I was just getting on with life.
I feel that I have had quite a journey over the last two years, with a fair balance of good and bad stuff, most of it emotional. I really feel for those that suffer a sense of loss when they do finally get to where they thought they wanted to be...been there.
I was not sure why we should come to Australia as we were pretty content at home, secure, good jobs and terrific friends and family. We knew that we were bored and wanted a change and truthfully I feel that I was heavily influenced by my husband and other people telling me how shit the UK was and if we could leave, we should. Shallow and ill-thought out...probably.
For those that know me and my story, cue massive chronic depression (if you are bored I am sure that you can find my six months and 1 year updates). Truthfully, for those that are struggling to make sense of their lives right now and might want to project two years forward, it might not be too bad an idea. I made it through with the support of my OH and a random bunch of in the flesh friends and BE buds that thought enough of me to keep me going.
Two years on, we still live in Melbourne. We have a large house, still the one child and now an Australian dog. We are probably better off here and better paid but I feel more insecure in terms of wealth, the future and my career. Emigrating when we did and the battle to re-establish ourselves has pretty much put paid to any thoughts of continuing to try for a much wanted second child. Lots of sadness about that.
My parents visit for two months every year nad my MIL and FIL will be trying for contributary visa status imminently. I have found friends, lost friends and drifted through friendships. It is hard here, people have established friendships and lives already and the friends and family you think will remain often don't. Conversely, you can become better friends with those you thought were mere aquaintances.
I do feel lonely and sometimes regret this journey but I feel that in the sense of a personal journey that continues, I have achieved more depth as a person for doing this than if I had remained at home. It is still hard. I work fulltime, have a long train journey and miss my son's growing but this is due to wanting to start where I left off at home. I look forward to a few months time where I can be settled enough to reduce my hours.
I enjoy living in Australia. I find a lack of hostility here and a hopefulness. I find people to be open, friendly and caring but not always mindful to keep in touch. The food is good, the supermarket choice could be better. I generally feel very safe except in the back of an terribly driven Melbourne taxi. Public transport is fair to middling at best. The Australian command of driving is not so great. The Yarra Valley until recently was a place to make your heart sing.
Northernbird, Casg and Carl, RugbyMatt, Aston and Sonly are a few of the many friends on here that have helped me through some dark days indeed. NB in particular gave me the advice that it's one day at a time and it is. (I'm off to sing along with my Lena Martell and Sidney Devine records as we speak). Last words on this are these - this is a forum, you have no idea how tough someone might be having it, so be kind if you can, it does not take a lot of effort and might mean a lot.
Just back on the site after being away for a bit. BE seemed to be getting a bit silly and me, well I was just getting on with life.
I feel that I have had quite a journey over the last two years, with a fair balance of good and bad stuff, most of it emotional. I really feel for those that suffer a sense of loss when they do finally get to where they thought they wanted to be...been there.
I was not sure why we should come to Australia as we were pretty content at home, secure, good jobs and terrific friends and family. We knew that we were bored and wanted a change and truthfully I feel that I was heavily influenced by my husband and other people telling me how shit the UK was and if we could leave, we should. Shallow and ill-thought out...probably.
For those that know me and my story, cue massive chronic depression (if you are bored I am sure that you can find my six months and 1 year updates). Truthfully, for those that are struggling to make sense of their lives right now and might want to project two years forward, it might not be too bad an idea. I made it through with the support of my OH and a random bunch of in the flesh friends and BE buds that thought enough of me to keep me going.
Two years on, we still live in Melbourne. We have a large house, still the one child and now an Australian dog. We are probably better off here and better paid but I feel more insecure in terms of wealth, the future and my career. Emigrating when we did and the battle to re-establish ourselves has pretty much put paid to any thoughts of continuing to try for a much wanted second child. Lots of sadness about that.
My parents visit for two months every year nad my MIL and FIL will be trying for contributary visa status imminently. I have found friends, lost friends and drifted through friendships. It is hard here, people have established friendships and lives already and the friends and family you think will remain often don't. Conversely, you can become better friends with those you thought were mere aquaintances.
I do feel lonely and sometimes regret this journey but I feel that in the sense of a personal journey that continues, I have achieved more depth as a person for doing this than if I had remained at home. It is still hard. I work fulltime, have a long train journey and miss my son's growing but this is due to wanting to start where I left off at home. I look forward to a few months time where I can be settled enough to reduce my hours.
I enjoy living in Australia. I find a lack of hostility here and a hopefulness. I find people to be open, friendly and caring but not always mindful to keep in touch. The food is good, the supermarket choice could be better. I generally feel very safe except in the back of an terribly driven Melbourne taxi. Public transport is fair to middling at best. The Australian command of driving is not so great. The Yarra Valley until recently was a place to make your heart sing.
Northernbird, Casg and Carl, RugbyMatt, Aston and Sonly are a few of the many friends on here that have helped me through some dark days indeed. NB in particular gave me the advice that it's one day at a time and it is. (I'm off to sing along with my Lena Martell and Sidney Devine records as we speak). Last words on this are these - this is a forum, you have no idea how tough someone might be having it, so be kind if you can, it does not take a lot of effort and might mean a lot.
Mar 15th 2009, 3:07 am
#4
Account Closed
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 1,693
Re: We've passed the two year mark!
.[/QUOTE]
A well written post that, confirming the realities.
A well written post that, confirming the realities.
Mar 15th 2009, 3:14 am
#5
~~~
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 1,849
Re: We've passed the two year mark!
Nice update 
Glad to hear things are back on track for you.
Glad to hear things are back on track for you.
Mar 15th 2009, 7:52 am
#6
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Joined: Jun 2007
Location: Tropical North QLD
Posts: 21,434
Mar 15th 2009, 7:53 am
#7
A rather curious boy
Thread Starter
Joined: Aug 2006
Location: Melbourne
Posts: 5,917
Re: We've passed the two year mark!
Couldn't have said it better myself. It is a difficult journey for many.
Well done BB for sticking with it
[/QUOTE]
And well done to you too SallyClaire. You've had your fair share of ups and downs too.
Well done BB for sticking with it
[/QUOTE]And well done to you too SallyClaire. You've had your fair share of ups and downs too.
Mar 15th 2009, 8:57 am
#8
no stressin no fussin....
Joined: Aug 2007
Location: Fantasy Island....
Posts: 12,616
Re: We've passed the two year mark!
Fabby post soul sister
If anyone can come through the darkest of days you can! You've been an inspiration and given help as well as received it. The fact you've come through the other end is a testiment to your character. You're a girl with balls
On a side note: Something you said rang very true about having to start again and people not keeping in touch.
I've met a few off this site, shared life stories and even had some stay. I genuinely care about them but what you said about starting again and feeling insecure in work is so true. We take for granted starting again in a new country will be hard, but nothing can prepare you for the emotional insecurity, paying bills, trying to keep a job, working hard and how knackering it is to start all over again and try to keep all the *plates* from wobbling. By the time we get a job, settle in..for whatever reason it's time to move on again and your back to square one settling down again. It can take years to really feel settled. How do we find the time to keep all the plates from wobbling when sometimes its so hard even to stand still:cry:
The reality is for quite a few years I think it's all about survival but somehow if you can come to terms with the massive change, you will find a way to do it. As each year passes you get stronger, learn something else about yourself and others and slowly start thinking "me time". Those that mind don't matter, and those that matter don't mind.
As they say, time is a healer
Great post kidda - you're a good egg N
If anyone can come through the darkest of days you can! You've been an inspiration and given help as well as received it. The fact you've come through the other end is a testiment to your character. You're a girl with balls
On a side note: Something you said rang very true about having to start again and people not keeping in touch.
I've met a few off this site, shared life stories and even had some stay. I genuinely care about them but what you said about starting again and feeling insecure in work is so true. We take for granted starting again in a new country will be hard, but nothing can prepare you for the emotional insecurity, paying bills, trying to keep a job, working hard and how knackering it is to start all over again and try to keep all the *plates* from wobbling. By the time we get a job, settle in..for whatever reason it's time to move on again and your back to square one settling down again. It can take years to really feel settled. How do we find the time to keep all the plates from wobbling when sometimes its so hard even to stand still:cry:
The reality is for quite a few years I think it's all about survival but somehow if you can come to terms with the massive change, you will find a way to do it. As each year passes you get stronger, learn something else about yourself and others and slowly start thinking "me time". Those that mind don't matter, and those that matter don't mind.
As they say, time is a healer
Great post kidda - you're a good egg N
Mar 15th 2009, 10:28 am
#9
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Joined: Jun 2007
Location: Tropical North QLD
Posts: 21,434
Re: We've passed the two year mark!
Fabby post soul sister
If anyone can come through the darkest of days you can! You've been an inspiration and given help as well as received it. The fact you've come through the other end is a testiment to your character. You're a girl with balls
On a side note: Something you said rang very true about having to start again and people not keeping in touch.
I've met a few off this site, shared life stories and even had some stay. I genuinely care about them but what you said about starting again and feeling insecure in work is so true. We take for granted starting again in a new country will be hard, but nothing can prepare you for the emotional insecurity, paying bills, trying to keep a job, working hard and how knackering it is to start all over again and try to keep all the *plates* from wobbling. By the time we get a job, settle in..for whatever reason it's time to move on again and your back to square one settling down again. It can take years to really feel settled. How do we find the time to keep all the plates from wobbling when sometimes its so hard even to stand still:cry:
The reality is for quite a few years I think it's all about survival but somehow if you can come to terms with the massive change, you will find a way to do it. As each year passes you get stronger, learn something else about yourself and others and slowly start thinking "me time". Those that mind don't matter, and those that matter don't mind.
As they say, time is a healer
Great post kidda - you're a good egg N
If anyone can come through the darkest of days you can! You've been an inspiration and given help as well as received it. The fact you've come through the other end is a testiment to your character. You're a girl with balls
On a side note: Something you said rang very true about having to start again and people not keeping in touch.
I've met a few off this site, shared life stories and even had some stay. I genuinely care about them but what you said about starting again and feeling insecure in work is so true. We take for granted starting again in a new country will be hard, but nothing can prepare you for the emotional insecurity, paying bills, trying to keep a job, working hard and how knackering it is to start all over again and try to keep all the *plates* from wobbling. By the time we get a job, settle in..for whatever reason it's time to move on again and your back to square one settling down again. It can take years to really feel settled. How do we find the time to keep all the plates from wobbling when sometimes its so hard even to stand still:cry:
The reality is for quite a few years I think it's all about survival but somehow if you can come to terms with the massive change, you will find a way to do it. As each year passes you get stronger, learn something else about yourself and others and slowly start thinking "me time". Those that mind don't matter, and those that matter don't mind.
As they say, time is a healer
Great post kidda - you're a good egg N
Mar 15th 2009, 11:04 am
#10
no stressin no fussin....
Joined: Aug 2007
Location: Fantasy Island....
Posts: 12,616
Mar 16th 2009, 12:08 am
#11
Born to be wild....
Joined: Mar 2005
Location: Northants to Brisbane.
Posts: 5,450
Re: We've passed the two year mark!
A well written post that, confirming the realities.[/QUOTE]
I agree, I am fast approaching two years, ups and downs, overall glad we did.
Your post was spot on, it seems the things you don't worry about when coming are the challenges your faced with.
Mar 16th 2009, 5:46 am
#12
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 1,905
Re: We've passed the two year mark!
Good update, glad to see you back.
Well done
Gems
Well done
Gems
Mar 16th 2009, 10:53 pm
#13
Account Closed
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 4,374
Re: We've passed the two year mark!
fantastic update N, i can relate to it all
Mar 18th 2009, 7:07 pm
#14
Forum Regular
Joined: Sep 2007
Posts: 40
Re: We've passed the two year mark!
Interesting to read your update, I confess I did not know of your journey. As someone who has been here for 21 months and going through one of the ""lows"" at present with serious doubt creeping in, it was good to read of both negatives and postives from someone else's perspective. Personally it's not the country I have issues with just the bureaucracy!!
Mar 18th 2009, 10:28 pm
#15
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Joined: Jun 2007
Location: Tropical North QLD
Posts: 21,434
Re: We've passed the two year mark!
Interesting to read your update, I confess I did not know of your journey. As someone who has been here for 21 months and going through one of the ""lows"" at present with serious doubt creeping in, it was good to read of both negatives and postives from someone else's perspective. Personally it's not the country I have issues with just the bureaucracy!!
Sorry you are feeling unsettled & hope that it's just a phase that will pass quickly.