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Two years today, still not sure...
It all started so well, we settled immediately, got jobs, got a nice rental, explored the whole of Sydney at the weekends, loved the sunshine etc. But I've been gradually feeling less and less settled as the months go on. Surely it's supposed to work the other way?! I've had a few knocks, two uncles dying within 10 days of each other, getting bouts of depression which I hadn't had in years and I still miss my friends in London terribly but generally I don't REALLY have anything to complain about. But I know I'm not happy. I find Australians to be odd, I find Australian culture odd (so patronising), the tv is shocking and it hits me occasionally that we're so far from anywhere. Where do you holiday if you don't have a budget of $$$$? Australia. Because everywhere else is too far away (obviously I knew this before coming here but I didn't know I'd react this way). Everything is so stupidly expensive that buying anything makes me fed up because it's another wodge of cash gone on a fridge or a heater (coz the houses aren't bloody set up for the cold...why??).
Basically I feel decidedly 'meh' about the whole thing. I know I don't want to go back to London but I can't see me existing like this for the rest of my days either. Sorry to be on a downer, was truly hoping that at the two year mark I'd be on top of the world at the bottom of the world :o |
Re: Two years today, still not sure...
sorry you are feeling like this theres nothing worse than feeling like a square peg in a round hole. Sometimes this happens as the novelty wears off and people feel more "british" than they realise and that there's no place like "home'. Don't beat yourself up about it it happens to loads of people. Maybe take a holiday back to UK to see how you feel before you make the decision to go back?
Either way good luck that you find peace mate:fingerscrossed: |
Re: Two years today, still not sure...
I know what you mean about the "meh" bit as another wodge of cash goes. Having relatives die when you are away from the UK and all your support team is hard- my uncle died within a few months of getting here and we couldn't afford to go back for the funeral, then my dad got cancer and died a couple of years later. It is still hard at times, and I have to admit to feeling a little depressed when I was having to deal with this and MS.
It was only when I went back to the UK for my Dad's funeral that I realised that I'd feel just the same in the UK- if not more so, as the weather was terrible and I suffer from SAD in the winters there, whereas I don't here. I hope that you can come to terms with how you feel - as Walter suggests, if you can afford it, take a trip back to the UK- it might crystallise your feelings one way or the other. ps. I watch a lot of UK tv. It helps!! |
Re: Two years today, still not sure...
Originally Posted by sonlymewalter
(Post 10818736)
sorry you are feeling like this theres nothing worse than feeling like a square peg in a round hole. Sometimes this happens as the novelty wears off and people feel more "british" than they realise and that there's no place like "home'. Don't beat yourself up about it it happens to loads of people. Maybe take a holiday back to UK to see how you feel before you make the decision to go back?
Either way good luck that you find peace mate:fingerscrossed: Anyway, am meeting some lovely ladies from BE on Sunday and very much looking forward to it :) |
Re: Two years today, still not sure...
Originally Posted by carolinephillips
(Post 10819461)
I know what you mean about the "meh" bit as another wodge of cash goes. Having relatives die when you are away from the UK and all your support team is hard- my uncle died within a few months of getting here and we couldn't afford to go back for the funeral, then my dad got cancer and died a couple of years later. It is still hard at times, and I have to admit to feeling a little depressed when I was having to deal with this and MS.
It was only when I went back to the UK for my Dad's funeral that I realised that I'd feel just the same in the UK- if not more so, as the weather was terrible and I suffer from SAD in the winters there, whereas I don't here. I hope that you can come to terms with how you feel - as Walter suggests, if you can afford it, take a trip back to the UK- it might crystallise your feelings one way or the other. ps. I watch a lot of UK tv. It helps!! LOL about the TV, we watch almost all American TV! See you Sunday? :) |
Re: Two years today, still not sure...
Originally Posted by RedT
(Post 10819730)
Thanks! I was back in Ireland this year but as luck would have it, the whole holiday went horribly wrong and i couldn't wait to get back here!! (yes, I get the irony!) I spoke to a very good friend in London for two hours last night and felt heaps better although missing her at the same time. It seems talking to old friends makes me feel way better but that in itself seems somewhat counter-productive?
Anyway, am meeting some lovely ladies from BE on Sunday and very much looking forward to it :) |
Re: Two years today, still not sure...
Originally Posted by RedT
(Post 10819733)
Thanks Caroline! If nothing else I know I don't want to back to Ireland/London/Scotland so that definitely helps in a way. If we're not in Australia it'll be America but not Europe.
LOL about the TV, we watch almost all American TV! See you Sunday? :) |
Re: Two years today, still not sure...
Life's like that once you get the adventure bug - 2 or 3 years and the itchy feet start again. Life is mundane no matter where you live it, unfortunately. Hope you can get other good opportunities that take you somewhere where there is less meh!
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Re: Two years today, still not sure...
Indeed Quoll, but it's not the mundane that bothers me. We've made plenty of effort to get out and do stuff, see places, meet people but it still just feels a bit meh, almost like there's nothing of substance even though we've done the art galleries and museums and there IS plenty of culture here. I suppose having been sick for weeks doesn't help because I've no energy to do anything beyond drag my carcass to work and back but it's just the general feeling of numbness I can't stand. I can't say I love it here but I don't know why.
In other news, I had lunch with some truly lovely ladies from BE and Sunday, best afternoon I've had in a long time and definitely needed :o :thumbsup: |
Re: Two years today, still not sure...
Originally Posted by RedT
(Post 10823824)
Indeed Quoll, but it's not the mundane that bothers me. We've made plenty of effort to get out and do stuff, see places, meet people but it still just feels a bit meh, almost like there's nothing of substance even though we've done the art galleries and museums and there IS plenty of culture here. I suppose having been sick for weeks doesn't help because I've no energy to do anything beyond drag my carcass to work and back but it's just the general feeling of numbness I can't stand. I can't say I love it here but I don't know why.
In other news, I had lunch with some truly lovely ladies from BE and Sunday, best afternoon I've had in a long time and definitely needed :o :thumbsup: Thoroughly enjoyed it too.:thumbsup::starsmile: |
Re: Two years today, still not sure...
a piss up in the nags on the 10th will sort you out. if it's any consolation, I've been decidedly meh several times, but I feel at home now
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Re: Two years today, still not sure...
Originally Posted by RedT
(Post 10819730)
Thanks! I was back in Ireland this year but as luck would have it, the whole holiday went horribly wrong and i couldn't wait to get back here!! (yes, I get the irony!) I spoke to a very good friend in London for two hours last night and felt heaps better although missing her at the same time. It seems talking to old friends makes me feel way better but that in itself seems somewhat counter-productive?
Anyway, am meeting some lovely ladies from BE on Sunday and very much looking forward to it :) I couldn't make Sunday as we were moving into our house, but if you fancy meeting in a few weeks, I'm happy to come to Sydney for the day. |
Re: Two years today, still not sure...
Originally Posted by Kapri
(Post 10826172)
Big hugs ((())) for you.
I couldn't make Sunday as we were moving into our house, but if you fancy meeting in a few weeks, I'm happy to come to Sydney for the day. |
Re: Two years today, still not sure...
Originally Posted by carolinephillips
(Post 10827736)
Let us know!!!:thumbsup:
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Re: Two years today, still not sure...
Ooh yes please Kapri, I was wondering where you were on Sunday :D
Hopefully see you soon! Tx |
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