Shabee's going home
#31
Re: Shabee's going home
I'm not certain but I believe she was getting on the plane back to the UK yesterday. She mentioned when she was going on the thread where she was trying to sell her vehicles.
So probably not much point in advising her to try somewhere else now!
Good luck with everything back in the UK.
So probably not much point in advising her to try somewhere else now!
Good luck with everything back in the UK.
#32
Re: Shabee's going home
Hi Shabee,
Contrary to what lots of people tell you about giving it a go for 6/12/24/however many months - I believe you know instinctually within the first few weeks if it's right for you or not. I think most of us push those instincts aside because we WANT to make it work. But - if it's not meant to be in the first place, then no point wasting more time ( and money! ).
There is life to be lived elsewhere and life goes on no matter what obstacles appear infront of you. I say don't waste time being unhappy if your gut feeling is that it's not right for you.I also think the longer you stay and longer you fight against those instincts the more complicated things become and it can be harder to leave when you want to.
Of course, not everyone will agree with me and that's fine. But I am telling it from what would seem to be a common perspective from those returning to the UK.
When I first announced I was leaving Oz to go back to the Uk I felt as though people around me here hassled me about it and made me feel like I didn't really "give it a go" but I gave it 2 years of my life this time 'round and a lot of that time was hard and not as pleasant as it should have been.
If I didn't give it a go I wouldn't have spent 2 years here, but personally I knew within the first month here that it wasn't right for us despite pushing those instincts away.
All the best wherever you end up!!
x
Contrary to what lots of people tell you about giving it a go for 6/12/24/however many months - I believe you know instinctually within the first few weeks if it's right for you or not. I think most of us push those instincts aside because we WANT to make it work. But - if it's not meant to be in the first place, then no point wasting more time ( and money! ).
There is life to be lived elsewhere and life goes on no matter what obstacles appear infront of you. I say don't waste time being unhappy if your gut feeling is that it's not right for you.I also think the longer you stay and longer you fight against those instincts the more complicated things become and it can be harder to leave when you want to.
Of course, not everyone will agree with me and that's fine. But I am telling it from what would seem to be a common perspective from those returning to the UK.
When I first announced I was leaving Oz to go back to the Uk I felt as though people around me here hassled me about it and made me feel like I didn't really "give it a go" but I gave it 2 years of my life this time 'round and a lot of that time was hard and not as pleasant as it should have been.
If I didn't give it a go I wouldn't have spent 2 years here, but personally I knew within the first month here that it wasn't right for us despite pushing those instincts away.
All the best wherever you end up!!
x
#33
Re: Shabee's going home
Best of luck to you and yours back in Aberdeen Sharon.
You should've come to Perth ~ my son Craig would've been chuffed to kick a ball around the park with a fellow Aberdonian.
I know if we'd been in a rental we'd have been back there now too. The drop in property prices leave me unwilling to sell at a huge loss. It cost enough to get here in the first place.
I remember telling you before you left that if your son didn't want to come it would be extremely difficult, as I have found from experience.
We've been here 19 months now ~ son still hates it and would get on a plane tomorrow. OH has bad days and I wouldn't say good days, but not so bad days.
I've managed to settle in fine and get a good job. Neither OH or son have found a job they can tolerate.
We all miss our daughters back home in Scotland.
I remember living our lives in limbo waiting for the visa. Well here we are almost 2 years down the line and still in limbo. Do we sell at a loss and move back to Aberdeen with no jobs, nowhere to stay and perhaps not enough to buy a house? Do we stay here hoping property prices recover? Will we ever settle here?
I don't resent my men ~ it's just how they feel. Certainly I've seen this as a great adventure and a way to appreciate what we had. I didn't hate my life in the UK and don't care where I live as long as I have a roof over my head and my family happy......
Sometimes the sunshine, large house and swimming pool just aren't enough to make it worth it.
(and if I hear one more Australian telling me I don't pronounce my name properly I'll scream)
You should've come to Perth ~ my son Craig would've been chuffed to kick a ball around the park with a fellow Aberdonian.
I know if we'd been in a rental we'd have been back there now too. The drop in property prices leave me unwilling to sell at a huge loss. It cost enough to get here in the first place.
I remember telling you before you left that if your son didn't want to come it would be extremely difficult, as I have found from experience.
We've been here 19 months now ~ son still hates it and would get on a plane tomorrow. OH has bad days and I wouldn't say good days, but not so bad days.
I've managed to settle in fine and get a good job. Neither OH or son have found a job they can tolerate.
We all miss our daughters back home in Scotland.
I remember living our lives in limbo waiting for the visa. Well here we are almost 2 years down the line and still in limbo. Do we sell at a loss and move back to Aberdeen with no jobs, nowhere to stay and perhaps not enough to buy a house? Do we stay here hoping property prices recover? Will we ever settle here?
I don't resent my men ~ it's just how they feel. Certainly I've seen this as a great adventure and a way to appreciate what we had. I didn't hate my life in the UK and don't care where I live as long as I have a roof over my head and my family happy......
Sometimes the sunshine, large house and swimming pool just aren't enough to make it worth it.
(and if I hear one more Australian telling me I don't pronounce my name properly I'll scream)
#34
Master of verbal pish©
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 22,198
Re: Shabee's going home
well done you. a lot of people would have stuck it out till all the family were fighting and couldnt take much more of each other. you must be stronger than most to give up what you want.
well done you and good luck with everything you do
soapy
well done you and good luck with everything you do
soapy
I write this with very mixed up feelings.
We have decided that we are going home.
We arrived here in Sept after what seemed like an eternity waiting for our visa. 2.5 years to get here infact.
It just is not working out for us and we are biting the bullet and going home.
I have 2 teenage boys and a husband who really hate being here and although I dont want to go back I have to do what is best for my family.
We could go through the palava of moving areas, states etc. but I know in my heart that it is not for them.
Who knows what the future will bring and we have a 5 year visa so anything is possible.
I say all this with a heavy heart.
I really thank all of you who helped us in the past, and I wish those of you over here and those heading over all the best.
Love
Shabee
x
We have decided that we are going home.
We arrived here in Sept after what seemed like an eternity waiting for our visa. 2.5 years to get here infact.
It just is not working out for us and we are biting the bullet and going home.
I have 2 teenage boys and a husband who really hate being here and although I dont want to go back I have to do what is best for my family.
We could go through the palava of moving areas, states etc. but I know in my heart that it is not for them.
Who knows what the future will bring and we have a 5 year visa so anything is possible.
I say all this with a heavy heart.
I really thank all of you who helped us in the past, and I wish those of you over here and those heading over all the best.
Love
Shabee
x
#35
Re: Shabee's going home
Best of luck to you and yours back in Aberdeen Sharon.
You should've come to Perth ~ my son Craig would've been chuffed to kick a ball around the park with a fellow Aberdonian.
I know if we'd been in a rental we'd have been back there now too. The drop in property prices leave me unwilling to sell at a huge loss. It cost enough to get here in the first place.
I remember telling you before you left that if your son didn't want to come it would be extremely difficult, as I have found from experience.
We've been here 19 months now ~ son still hates it and would get on a plane tomorrow. OH has bad days and I wouldn't say good days, but not so bad days.
I've managed to settle in fine and get a good job. Neither OH or son have found a job they can tolerate.
We all miss our daughters back home in Scotland.
I remember living our lives in limbo waiting for the visa. Well here we are almost 2 years down the line and still in limbo. Do we sell at a loss and move back to Aberdeen with no jobs, nowhere to stay and perhaps not enough to buy a house? Do we stay here hoping property prices recover? Will we ever settle here?
I don't resent my men ~ it's just how they feel. Certainly I've seen this as a great adventure and a way to appreciate what we had. I didn't hate my life in the UK and don't care where I live as long as I have a roof over my head and my family happy......
Sometimes the sunshine, large house and swimming pool just aren't enough to make it worth it.
(and if I hear one more Australian telling me I don't pronounce my name properly I'll scream)
You should've come to Perth ~ my son Craig would've been chuffed to kick a ball around the park with a fellow Aberdonian.
I know if we'd been in a rental we'd have been back there now too. The drop in property prices leave me unwilling to sell at a huge loss. It cost enough to get here in the first place.
I remember telling you before you left that if your son didn't want to come it would be extremely difficult, as I have found from experience.
We've been here 19 months now ~ son still hates it and would get on a plane tomorrow. OH has bad days and I wouldn't say good days, but not so bad days.
I've managed to settle in fine and get a good job. Neither OH or son have found a job they can tolerate.
We all miss our daughters back home in Scotland.
I remember living our lives in limbo waiting for the visa. Well here we are almost 2 years down the line and still in limbo. Do we sell at a loss and move back to Aberdeen with no jobs, nowhere to stay and perhaps not enough to buy a house? Do we stay here hoping property prices recover? Will we ever settle here?
I don't resent my men ~ it's just how they feel. Certainly I've seen this as a great adventure and a way to appreciate what we had. I didn't hate my life in the UK and don't care where I live as long as I have a roof over my head and my family happy......
Sometimes the sunshine, large house and swimming pool just aren't enough to make it worth it.
(and if I hear one more Australian telling me I don't pronounce my name properly I'll scream)
The boys are great, you would think we have never been away. Arrived back at 10pm on Sat. night and my youngest was at sheds on Sunday morning playing for his team, and he scored lol.
They went back to school yesterday. Both went right back into there same classes.
Neither my Oh or I are working yet as it is really quiet in Aberdeen just now but you know what January is like here. Not overly worried yet!
Aberdeen just the same, bloody freezing. I forgot what it was like to have cold feet constantly.
Am I happy to be back? yes and no. There is a lot to miss in Oz but I just think that I was very lucky to have been able to try it.
Take Care Jan
x
#36
Re: Shabee's going home
My family fought all the time we were there lol and there is only so much I could take before I ended up losing it.
Miss the place though
x
#37
Re: Shabee's going home
Oh Jan, so sorry to hear your lot are still not settled there yet. I really think my lot would have been the same if we had gave it longer. We are now back in a rented flat in Kincorth trying to buy a house. We are lucky that we cut our loses and came back still having money in the bank. We are looking at a house in Northfield just now and hope if we get it we may be mortgage free. That would be a boast lol.
The boys are great, you would think we have never been away. Arrived back at 10pm on Sat. night and my youngest was at sheds on Sunday morning playing for his team, and he scored lol.
They went back to school yesterday. Both went right back into there same classes.
Neither my Oh or I are working yet as it is really quiet in Aberdeen just now but you know what January is like here. Not overly worried yet!
Aberdeen just the same, bloody freezing. I forgot what it was like to have cold feet constantly.
Am I happy to be back? yes and no. There is a lot to miss in Oz but I just think that I was very lucky to have been able to try it.
Take Care Jan
x
The boys are great, you would think we have never been away. Arrived back at 10pm on Sat. night and my youngest was at sheds on Sunday morning playing for his team, and he scored lol.
They went back to school yesterday. Both went right back into there same classes.
Neither my Oh or I are working yet as it is really quiet in Aberdeen just now but you know what January is like here. Not overly worried yet!
Aberdeen just the same, bloody freezing. I forgot what it was like to have cold feet constantly.
Am I happy to be back? yes and no. There is a lot to miss in Oz but I just think that I was very lucky to have been able to try it.
Take Care Jan
x
Still not sure where our future lies.
Glad you have slotted back into your old lives. I'll keep my fingers crossed for your Northfield purchase - at least it will be handy for the school.
All the best Sharon - Please keep in touch.
Jan
#38
Master of verbal pish©
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 22,198
Re: Shabee's going home
im glad to hear the kids have settled back in and it will just feel like a big holiday to them in time. but at least you showed them that the world is a bigger place and it might broaden them as people as they grow.
keep us all updated please
soapy
#39
Forum Regular
Joined: Nov 2007
Location: Scottish but living in Belgium for 6 years
Posts: 140
Re: Shabee's going home
I can understand how tough it must have been for you to make the decision. Like you said having older kids make is harder..
We are going to Perth in July and my youngest Son and my Daughter are not so happy.. It is going to be a constant battle to make them feel settled. We are making sure we go to an area where there is lots things for teenagers to do etc with train stations lol..I have my brother and his family there so it will help but when your own family are not happy you have to take that into consideration.. If the dam visa application had not taken so long we would been there when my kids were just a bit younger so would been a wee bit better I think.. We are going out and we shall see what happens.
I hope that you are happy wherever you end up Shabee and like you say you have the visa for 5 years so who knows..
Enjoy being back in Scotland..
We are going to Perth in July and my youngest Son and my Daughter are not so happy.. It is going to be a constant battle to make them feel settled. We are making sure we go to an area where there is lots things for teenagers to do etc with train stations lol..I have my brother and his family there so it will help but when your own family are not happy you have to take that into consideration.. If the dam visa application had not taken so long we would been there when my kids were just a bit younger so would been a wee bit better I think.. We are going out and we shall see what happens.
I hope that you are happy wherever you end up Shabee and like you say you have the visa for 5 years so who knows..
Enjoy being back in Scotland..
#40
Re: Shabee's going home
Congratulations on being so brave. I wish you and your family all the best back in the greatest country in the world.
#41
Re: Shabee's going home
Hi Shabbi, I know I don't know you so I hope you don't mind me commenting on your situation. I have only just applied to Australia but I lived in Bermuda for two years until middle of last year so I do have some experience of moving away.
I think it is incredibly brave of you to go back now after all your hard work in getting there. But it also seems like such a shame for the same reason. We have agreed at the outset that we will give it a minimum period come what may, if only you could ask the rest of the family to do that. I read on another of these threads (I am working my way thru them!) that a decision should be yours and your husbands because children can make their own decision soon enough and maybe will move away from you even in the UK. I had not thought of that before but it does make some sense.
Anyway, you did it. You are brave for going out and brave for coming back. I wish you well.
I think it is incredibly brave of you to go back now after all your hard work in getting there. But it also seems like such a shame for the same reason. We have agreed at the outset that we will give it a minimum period come what may, if only you could ask the rest of the family to do that. I read on another of these threads (I am working my way thru them!) that a decision should be yours and your husbands because children can make their own decision soon enough and maybe will move away from you even in the UK. I had not thought of that before but it does make some sense.
Anyway, you did it. You are brave for going out and brave for coming back. I wish you well.
#42
Re: Shabee's going home
when you have teens your not used to spending so much time together. so if the kids dont find friends fast they start to spend far too much time with the parents. then everybody starts to get on each others nerves
im glad to hear the kids have settled back in and it will just feel like a big holiday to them in time. but at least you showed them that the world is a bigger place and it might broaden them as people as they grow.
keep us all updated please
soapy
im glad to hear the kids have settled back in and it will just feel like a big holiday to them in time. but at least you showed them that the world is a bigger place and it might broaden them as people as they grow.
keep us all updated please
soapy
Very true post soapy ( as always!)