btazgallacher

Hey its a positive step already for the fact that deep down you know you don t want to go back. Once you get that feeling you are on yr way to a good life. it can only get better.

CEM

Not really advice but that's exactly how I felt. I wanted my friends and the familiarity but not the place. A friend of mine asked 'If someone said to you they could pack up all your stuff and ship you home tomorrow, would you go?'. I realised that I wouldn't. I wasn't unhappy, just unsettled and it took time to feel comfortable. I wanted all my friends and family to be there with us experiencing the fantastic things we were experiencing
We did come back to the Uk 5 years ago and I felt very unhappy for a long time. Family and friends were pleased to have us back at first but didn't want to hear about Aus or what we'd been up to and the friend who made the biggest fuss about us going (phoning and writing every day for 6 mths!), I've seen about 10 or 11 times since we got back!
We're heading back in Jan (Sydney this time) and I know I'll go through the same feelings - at least this time I know they're normal and with time they will pass.
Good luck - it's a shame we can't mix what we like best about both places and live there!

shiels

This peoplesickness is so unpredictable is'nt it, you just don't know when or how hard it is going to hit you!!

Mine seems to come in waves too and usually after talking to someone who I miss so much, but I also know that life goes on for all the people back at home in the UK.

Have to agree there is defintely something that you just don't want to let go of, but then again why should we? It's part of our lives and it's good to have something to hold onto I reckon

We've been here 15 months now and it's only recently that I have realised that everything around me is now becoming really familiar as though I've been here a very long time!! But don't reckon I will ever be peoplesick free so will just try and deal with it the best I can

C x

Rodfan

Hi,there on reading your post sounds very similar to what we have been through the past two years we have pingponged due to my extreme homesickness and missing my family but couldnt settle back in the U.K. either so have now been back in Melbourne for 5 months, for me some of those old homesick feelings are back! are you feeling more settled the second time around? we can not afford to keep going back and forth,but hate feeling so unsettled all the time( age 45 and 48) I was so sure I was getting used to OZ before we went back to the U.k. we also had to follow through going back as had commited ourselves also. Just dont think I can live without my family forever...

bluekipper

This worries us, were 41 & 48 yrs, and returned to UK with looking at returning to OZ nxt yr! are we mad???? who knows, why would I think it`l be different nxt time, may be worse.. wish I was a fortune teller,lol

Wishing you lots of luck & hoping you feel settled very very soon, keep at it

Bluekipper

Cheetah7

I have been people sick from day one and like you, can not envisage living back in the UK.

Dad calls me every day, I find talking to people on the phone about the 'same old' stuff helps keep things on an even keel for me.

I have been alot better this week because I tell myself a few things:

1. That I can talk to them every day, I can't see them but then I saw them every few months in the UK anyway.

2. That if I moved back I might be the 'well received hero of the hour' for about a few days, but then everything would slip back to normal and people would get back to their normal lives, and why shouldnt they? Their world doesnt revolve around me.

3. That many of us are lucky enough to be able to choose where we live, they have chosen to and are enjoying living where they live and I too have that right.

4. They enjoy hearing about another way of life - the wildlife that I see, just Aussie stuff really and they especially love the DVDs I make for them of where we live and the facebook video messages - in fact they are more involved in my Aussie life than they ever were in England.

5. Because I am living far away from them, we all appreciate each other more and I am also away from the usual 'family politics' - so all in all I get the nice stuff, we all cheer up when we phone each other and don't make time to moan or complain like we would in England.

6. My family are so proud of me and what my husband and I have acheived here - my asthma is better, we are living our lives in a way we never did in the UK for one reason or another - they love the fact I am not on my inhalers, that we are buying our first house - they want nice things for me and that is happening.

7. If we REALLY wanted to or had to go back to the UK then we would find a way.

8. Yes I cry because I can't see my Dad or friend but then I phone him or my family/friends and I always feel better.

9. They know that they can come to see us and we have given them their very own private little holiday destination complete with a 'tour guide'

10. Finally it is about choices - we choose to live our lives here and that choice has made us happy so in turn has made them happy.

Tomorrow I shall probably be emotional again - I am up and down like a tarts knickers, but I do at least now have some reasoning in my head on how to deal with it.

Australia is just another place to live, it has its fair share of crime and it is just a different way of life - it suits us and I guess the people sickness is the currency we pay for making that choice.

One big fat hug to you because I know exactly how you are feeling.

hitchcock71

i felt very homesick when i arrived i wanted to go home less than a month after we got here last november - we lived in a 3 bed serviced apartment when we got here which was fab - but so lonely as everyone there was on holiday so was out everyday - oh went to work less than a week after we got here

my kids turned in to monsters ! if i didn't go to the shops i might not speak to anyone for the day - i think i missed everything and everyone - from girlfriends dropping in after the school run to watching eastenders on tv to my fav brand of coffee (how sad is that)

a month after we moved here we moved in to our rental and our container arrived - my kids actually laughed and shouted when they opened their boxes to find their "pooh bear" my son actually said when he opened his box to find it " oh pooh bear i have missed you so much!"

2 weeks later christmas hit which my hubby was upset about - he missed his family - we had always gone to inlaws for christmas

jan i had a big bbq and invited some expats that i had met either through this site or from when we went to the kings park meet
it made me realise that i am not alone in feeling homesick that it is normal so hopefully it will get better

in april the inlaws came over for 3 weeks it waslovely but i was so glad when they went

in may we brought our house i was asked by my oh so our we staying then ? and i said yes

today after reading your post that yes i was there where you are but now nearly a year later i am happy and settled

my kids still miss there grandparents but skype is good with he webcam and on a sunday they are spening at least an hour on it


give your self time it does get easier

ps where are you north or south ?

love tiff

CEM

Wow! Could've written this myself - even down to the inhalers!
C x

celcite

Australia is like that...its so far away from the rest of the world that you will probably feel safest homesick....Just keep looking at the beautiful long blue sky,sea and extra slow pace of life.These are the things which will help you to spend rest of your life inside Australia.

Olibeneli

..........or going insane like my wife did !

Honestly can say that our eyes opened in realising all that we ignored about the UK. No amount of staring at a beach or sky or the sea can replace touring Europe, visiting ancient monuments and teaching our kids some history.........and the TVs a mile better too.

Horses for courses and I for one am glad that all my family can share a physical hug for many more years to come.

quoll

LOL yes, "inside" is right - just like jail. A slow death.

fific

Thanks for that - we are on the Sunshine Coast - which is beautiful but also a bit weird. Not sure what will ahppen but really want to avoid ping ponging.