Nikki

Well it only seems like 5 minutes ago since I wrote my 3 month update, that post was purely an info post to help people out with practical matters upon arrival, this post is more an update of the trials of the emotional aspect of the move.....here goes!!

In the weeks leading up to the move, yes you are emotional, but you are so busy with organising things and spending time with friends and family, you do kind of get swept along and time passes in a flash, once we landed I think emotionally it all caught up on me. I felt I had little interest in simple things, I recall my O/H bringing a car home on a test drive to show me, I just said if you like it, get it.....I couldn't be bothered.

O/H started work and kids started school.......I was left in a strange house, in a strange town, in a strange country, wow did I pity myself! There were times I wanted to pick up the phone and hear a friendly voice, but all my mates and my Mum were sleeping. My temper was short with the kids, my O/H would tell me funny stories about his day, my response was 'I wish I could tell you something funny, but I don't know anyone to talk to and therefore have nothing to tell you about my day!'.......you wouldn't think I had family here! I think I felt trapped as we had agreed after alway working full time whilst bringing up 3 kids, this was a great opportunity for me to stay home and be there for the kids, sounded great planning this in the UK, but the harsh reality was extremely lonely.

Don't get me wrong, not everyday in the beginning was like this, but many were and for me it clouded the start to our new life, I made a decision that either I pull my family down to the low level I was at or I started to climb back up , decision made! I needed to busy myself, I knew I could not look for work until after the long xmas holiday as I would have no childcare for the kids, so I decided to volunteer for the reading group at my children's school, on my first day I met a lovely mum who asked me for coffee after reading had finished and so started a wonderful friendship with Christine who went out of her way and still does to introduce me to other parents in the school, we have been to her house and her to ours, we have just had a social night out with our kids, which was great!

I also volunteered at another local school for kids who need extra help, after 1 day they offered me a p/t position, school hours and school hols off...talk about the right place at the right time! I was approached by a Mum at school to help with the canteen, which I do and they call upon me when they have been let down, I know they value my help and this has definitely earned me respect in the community as they know we are a family who wants to do our bit, we are not just pommies, we are part of their community, which definitely makes us feel accepted. I have arranged play dates for my kids and they have been to other kids houses.

I noticed my kids were falling into their old english habits, playstation and tv addicts, so I enrolled my little girl in tap on a Wednesday and Ballet on a Thursday, my middle boy is at Basketball on a Tuesday and has signed for soccer, which is training one night in the week and matches on a Saturday. My eldest is not the sporting type, but he is socially mixing with his friends now out of school, which is a positive step for him. They are changing their lifestyle which was one of the reasons for our move, they are really outgoing and happy.

I have a great friendship with Sleeping Beauty who I met on BE during my dark early days, she moved a month before us from my hometown of Manchester and lives only an hour away!!! Macquarie I have met now 3 times and she is lovely and is so helpful having moved here over 3 years ago. 2 weeks ago I met Electricbaby and Jenny for Eleebana, I hope that was the first of many meets!!

So, 6 months on, emotionally I am in a much better place, I am much more positive about our experience, I am certain we have made the right move, my kids are happy so O/H and I are happy. Be prepared for this to test your relationship, you have to be strong for eachother to pull one up when the other is down. My O/H was my tower of strength, days where physically he was drained, emotionally he found it in him to keep me going. We have survived this, we will survive anything.

Our only stumbling block at the moment is finances, we are still dipping into savings as with only one wage, it has been hard. We find grocery shopping expensive and added to other bills, I would say our free time is funded by savings. I start paid work on Monday, so this should help and O/H is going for his license, so hopefully in 6 months he will be self employed, which seems to be the way to make money in the building industry.

We have bought land and our house plans are currently in council, in 6 months we should be in our own 'home', only then will the rest of the boxes be unpacked, all my kids in their own rooms, with all their things laid out, back to some normality....I think only then will I start calling this country home, being in rented definitely lends a temporary feel about the process.

So thats it folks. Good luck to those still waiting and best of luck to all those on this side.

Nikki

Geordie George

Fabulous post, Nikki. Very honest about all aspects of the move - and nice to hear about the emotions involved. Congratulations on making a success of it.

nightnurse2

Great post Nikki, sounds as if you've really settled in.
Good luck with your house build and your new job
Tracey

Vash the Stampede

A thoughtful, realistic post with a great attitude.

Well done, Nikki!

comet555

Hope I get to meet you in May! We've officially booked our fligths, and we arrive in Sydney on May 5th, and we'll end up around Lake Macquarie a few days later.

Getting excited, but still hoping to find a job before we arrive.

Happy to hear everything is working out for you there

Jaycee1

Excellent post Nikki, thanks for sharing all your ups and downs in your new life.
J x

Sleeping Beauty

6 months, gawd how time flies eh nikki? it feels like we have known each other for longer than that. what a great catch up for everyone.

i hope that the work and financial side works out for you both. you both deserve it.

xx

Sara1970

Hi Nikki - thanks for sharing your experiences, i could relate to much of what you wrote. It is the emotional journey that is the rollercoaster. We are five months in and feeling much more settled.
Good luck with the house build
Sara

RooksieJ

Nikki bless your heart mate Tell you what girl, you have definitely got the right approach and i am going to make damn sure i take a leaf out of your book next time we make the move! Well done you

esperanza

Nikki - I've been waiting for your six-monther, can't believe it took me a week to notice it! Glad to hear you're settling down and feeling happy.
We'll be there in a little over a month!
Maybe when Comet555 is there we could arrange a meet somewhere?
(Coz I won't have any friends, boo hoo!! )

comet555

Would love to meet up. Hope you like kids! We have a 3 year old and a 6 month old so we'll be dragging them all over the country with us.

anne1

Thanks Nikki for the update,

I think everyone has idea's about moving and "the Better life".. Its really nice to hear everyone's up's and down's.. I am really worried about missing family and friends but determined to make a go of it.. So glad things are finally coming together for you... please keep us updated


Anne

esperanza

No worries, I love other people's kids! (Not that I dislike my own, I hasten to add, I don't have any yet!) Great fun to play with for a day and hand back in the evening then go back to my own nice quiet bedroom for a good night's sleep!

comet555

Ah.... if only I could do that sometimes

esperanza

Well don't try coming in to my nice quiet bedroom, that would just be weird!