3 months;could'nt hack it! back in Uk
#46
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Mar 2007
Location: Durham
Posts: 519
Re: 3 months;could'nt hack it! back in Uk
Sonic do you have children? we plan to move to cairns my kids are 12 and 15 and im wondering if we will make friends ok, Ive just got a job at the base hospital and I really hope this works for us, my brother in law and his wife are citizens now but I dont want to intrude on their circle of friends. Weve had many holidays there and love it but Im not going with rose tinted glasses and know its diferent when you are living and working there. my sister in law has had terrible home sickness and is very wary of encouraging us to move but is very settled now after 5 years, but its taken that time. scary times eh.
#47
Re: 3 months;could'nt hack it! back in Uk
Sonic do you have children? we plan to move to cairns my kids are 12 and 15 and im wondering if we will make friends ok, Ive just got a job at the base hospital and I really hope this works for us, my brother in law and his wife are citizens now but I dont want to intrude on their circle of friends. Weve had many holidays there and love it but Im not going with rose tinted glasses and know its diferent when you are living and working there. my sister in law has had terrible home sickness and is very wary of encouraging us to move but is very settled now after 5 years, but its taken that time. scary times eh.
No children yet I think you have to be open minded, and if someone you don't really know that well says "come round we're having a barbie".. then go.. take beer and food... it's a great way to meet people!
I've also joined a netball team.. and dragged a couple of mates along, so that's good for meeting people too..
My only advice would be, not to hark on about 'england' too much.. people will ask why you've come to Australia and whether you like it etc etc.. and be honest with them about you like and don't like.. but you have to not compare it to england .. it's not england it's australia..
Good luck.. i'm sure it'll be fine... i'm sure you're rellies won't mind you nicking a couple of their mates for a while, till you find some of your own!!
Sonic x
#48
Just Joined
Joined: Mar 2007
Posts: 29
Re: 3 months;could'nt hack it! back in Uk
I agree with you that it seems Perth is a place of unhappy people who want to go home, more than any other state.
I want to go home too and i'm in Perth. I wonder sometimes if i had moved to a different state i would have been happier. I will never know.
For me, Perth is boring. Yes it has lovely beaches, sunshine, ocean etc......(god i get sick of saying that)...but it has nothing else that interests me. I know some folk like all the peace and quiet in Perth, but it is too bloody quiet. The list continues but i can't be arsed explaining myself, i just don't like Perth and i am going home as soon as i can.
I want to go home too and i'm in Perth. I wonder sometimes if i had moved to a different state i would have been happier. I will never know.
For me, Perth is boring. Yes it has lovely beaches, sunshine, ocean etc......(god i get sick of saying that)...but it has nothing else that interests me. I know some folk like all the peace and quiet in Perth, but it is too bloody quiet. The list continues but i can't be arsed explaining myself, i just don't like Perth and i am going home as soon as i can.
#49
Re: 3 months;could'nt hack it! back in Uk
Its not just perth that makes you miserable! Im in brisbane & i hate it at the moment. Like another poster earlier on siad about cryng, well thats been me every day more or less since i got here 18 mths ago.
I want to go home & my hubs dosnt. He is actually prep;ared to lose me rather than go back as he hates the UK that much. That hurts me that he is selfish enough to want lose me & put Oz b4 my happiness. He has actually told me if im not happy to go.
When i agreed to come out i honestly thought it would be great & that id have no problems settling. Im an easy going gal that loves a laugh but ive yet to meet anyone on my wavelenght. Ive had bad experinces with the friends ive made so far so its now made me very weary
I feel angry at him as i want to go back & i blame him for bringing me here. I know i chose to but i only ever did to keep him happy.
Im now at a point where i have to make some sort of decision, hence why ive joined here in the hope of making some new friends
I dont care what anyone says but emigrating abroad is the hardest thing to do & i wish id thought harder b4 i made my decision as id still be in the UK now
I advice anyone to make sure they want to do it 100% b4 making a commitment esp if they are very family orientated like me!
I want to go home & my hubs dosnt. He is actually prep;ared to lose me rather than go back as he hates the UK that much. That hurts me that he is selfish enough to want lose me & put Oz b4 my happiness. He has actually told me if im not happy to go.
When i agreed to come out i honestly thought it would be great & that id have no problems settling. Im an easy going gal that loves a laugh but ive yet to meet anyone on my wavelenght. Ive had bad experinces with the friends ive made so far so its now made me very weary
I feel angry at him as i want to go back & i blame him for bringing me here. I know i chose to but i only ever did to keep him happy.
Im now at a point where i have to make some sort of decision, hence why ive joined here in the hope of making some new friends
I dont care what anyone says but emigrating abroad is the hardest thing to do & i wish id thought harder b4 i made my decision as id still be in the UK now
I advice anyone to make sure they want to do it 100% b4 making a commitment esp if they are very family orientated like me!
#50
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Nov 2005
Location: Wigan > Perth > Wigan
Posts: 1,233
Re: 3 months;could'nt hack it! back in Uk
Its not just perth that makes you miserable! Im in brisbane & i hate it at the moment. Like another poster earlier on siad about cryng, well thats been me every day more or less since i got here 18 mths ago.
I want to go home & my hubs dosnt. He is actually prep;ared to lose me rather than go back as he hates the UK that much. That hurts me that he is selfish enough to want lose me & put Oz b4 my happiness. He has actually told me if im not happy to go.
When i agreed to come out i honestly thought it would be great & that id have no problems settling. Im an easy going gal that loves a laugh but ive yet to meet anyone on my wavelenght. Ive had bad experinces with the friends ive made so far so its now made me very weary
I feel angry at him as i want to go back & i blame him for bringing me here. I know i chose to but i only ever did to keep him happy.
Im now at a point where i have to make some sort of decision, hence why ive joined here in the hope of making some new friends
I dont care what anyone says but emigrating abroad is the hardest thing to do & i wish id thought harder b4 i made my decision as id still be in the UK now
I advice anyone to make sure they want to do it 100% b4 making a commitment esp if they are very family orientated like me!
I want to go home & my hubs dosnt. He is actually prep;ared to lose me rather than go back as he hates the UK that much. That hurts me that he is selfish enough to want lose me & put Oz b4 my happiness. He has actually told me if im not happy to go.
When i agreed to come out i honestly thought it would be great & that id have no problems settling. Im an easy going gal that loves a laugh but ive yet to meet anyone on my wavelenght. Ive had bad experinces with the friends ive made so far so its now made me very weary
I feel angry at him as i want to go back & i blame him for bringing me here. I know i chose to but i only ever did to keep him happy.
Im now at a point where i have to make some sort of decision, hence why ive joined here in the hope of making some new friends
I dont care what anyone says but emigrating abroad is the hardest thing to do & i wish id thought harder b4 i made my decision as id still be in the UK now
I advice anyone to make sure they want to do it 100% b4 making a commitment esp if they are very family orientated like me!
It must be hard though when one person in the relationship wants to stay, I wish you all the best with whatever you decide anyway and I hope that you will be happy in whatever you choose. At the end of the day you've got to do what's best for you though as you can't live your life being miserable everyday.
Good luck.
#51
Re: 3 months;could'nt hack it! back in Uk
Its not just perth that makes you miserable! Im in brisbane & i hate it at the moment. Like another poster earlier on siad about cryng, well thats been me every day more or less since i got here 18 mths ago.
I want to go home & my hubs dosnt. He is actually prep;ared to lose me rather than go back as he hates the UK that much. That hurts me that he is selfish enough to want lose me & put Oz b4 my happiness. He has actually told me if im not happy to go.
When i agreed to come out i honestly thought it would be great & that id have no problems settling. Im an easy going gal that loves a laugh but ive yet to meet anyone on my wavelenght. Ive had bad experinces with the friends ive made so far so its now made me very weary
I feel angry at him as i want to go back & i blame him for bringing me here. I know i chose to but i only ever did to keep him happy.
Im now at a point where i have to make some sort of decision, hence why ive joined here in the hope of making some new friends
I dont care what anyone says but emigrating abroad is the hardest thing to do & i wish id thought harder b4 i made my decision as id still be in the UK now
I advice anyone to make sure they want to do it 100% b4 making a commitment esp if they are very family orientated like me!
I want to go home & my hubs dosnt. He is actually prep;ared to lose me rather than go back as he hates the UK that much. That hurts me that he is selfish enough to want lose me & put Oz b4 my happiness. He has actually told me if im not happy to go.
When i agreed to come out i honestly thought it would be great & that id have no problems settling. Im an easy going gal that loves a laugh but ive yet to meet anyone on my wavelenght. Ive had bad experinces with the friends ive made so far so its now made me very weary
I feel angry at him as i want to go back & i blame him for bringing me here. I know i chose to but i only ever did to keep him happy.
Im now at a point where i have to make some sort of decision, hence why ive joined here in the hope of making some new friends
I dont care what anyone says but emigrating abroad is the hardest thing to do & i wish id thought harder b4 i made my decision as id still be in the UK now
I advice anyone to make sure they want to do it 100% b4 making a commitment esp if they are very family orientated like me!
Now you have joined BE hope you can make more friends which may help you settle
#52
Re: 3 months;could'nt hack it! back in Uk
I know how you feel about being home/people sick etc as I've also been wanting to go home over the last few months. We may be going back in a couple of weeks. Been here a little over 5 months.
It must be hard though when one person in the relationship wants to stay, I wish you all the best with whatever you decide anyway and I hope that you will be happy in whatever you choose. At the end of the day you've got to do what's best for you though as you can't live your life being miserable everyday.
Good luck.
It must be hard though when one person in the relationship wants to stay, I wish you all the best with whatever you decide anyway and I hope that you will be happy in whatever you choose. At the end of the day you've got to do what's best for you though as you can't live your life being miserable everyday.
Good luck.
Your right though i have to make a decision as at the moment my marriage is heading for collapse!
#54
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Nov 2005
Location: Wigan > Perth > Wigan
Posts: 1,233
Re: 3 months;could'nt hack it! back in Uk
Ive read your posts mate & have to admit your not alone in how you feel as i knew within a month id made a mistake but ive carried on as everyone siad to give it at least 2 years. Here i am 19 mths on & still feeling the same
Your right though i have to make a decision as at the moment my marriage is heading for collapse!
Your right though i have to make a decision as at the moment my marriage is heading for collapse!
Yeah everyone says you have to give it 2 years etc, but thats only because thats when you can get your citizenship. As much as I would like to get citizenship I'm certainly not gonna stay and be miserable most of the time for 2 years just to get it and then possibly never use it.
I hope you can work things out anyway, you're not alone on here!
#55
Re: 3 months;could'nt hack it! back in Uk
Blimey, hope things improve. Looking back it was a very crushing experience. I am glad we returned as quickly as we did. You know your own mind, it's just going to be hard to decide where to go from here. BE will really help, at least you know you are not alone in your feelings. x
#56
Forum Regular
Joined: Apr 2007
Location: Melbourne
Posts: 30
Re: 3 months;could'nt hack it! back in Uk
Its not just perth that makes you miserable! Im in brisbane & i hate it at the moment. Like another poster earlier on siad about cryng, well thats been me every day more or less since i got here 18 mths ago.
I want to go home & my hubs dosnt. He is actually prep;ared to lose me rather than go back as he hates the UK that much. That hurts me that he is selfish enough to want lose me & put Oz b4 my happiness. He has actually told me if im not happy to go.
When i agreed to come out i honestly thought it would be great & that id have no problems settling. Im an easy going gal that loves a laugh but ive yet to meet anyone on my wavelenght. Ive had bad experinces with the friends ive made so far so its now made me very weary
I feel angry at him as i want to go back & i blame him for bringing me here. I know i chose to but i only ever did to keep him happy.
Im now at a point where i have to make some sort of decision, hence why ive joined here in the hope of making some new friends
I dont care what anyone says but emigrating abroad is the hardest thing to do & i wish id thought harder b4 i made my decision as id still be in the UK now
I advice anyone to make sure they want to do it 100% b4 making a commitment esp if they are very family orientated like me!
I want to go home & my hubs dosnt. He is actually prep;ared to lose me rather than go back as he hates the UK that much. That hurts me that he is selfish enough to want lose me & put Oz b4 my happiness. He has actually told me if im not happy to go.
When i agreed to come out i honestly thought it would be great & that id have no problems settling. Im an easy going gal that loves a laugh but ive yet to meet anyone on my wavelenght. Ive had bad experinces with the friends ive made so far so its now made me very weary
I feel angry at him as i want to go back & i blame him for bringing me here. I know i chose to but i only ever did to keep him happy.
Im now at a point where i have to make some sort of decision, hence why ive joined here in the hope of making some new friends
I dont care what anyone says but emigrating abroad is the hardest thing to do & i wish id thought harder b4 i made my decision as id still be in the UK now
I advice anyone to make sure they want to do it 100% b4 making a commitment esp if they are very family orientated like me!
I can totally agree with EVERYTHING you have said.
I have been here 16 months, have built a house live near the sea but regret coming over as i miss family and friends and familiarities a lot.
My partner to has told me to go back as he's not prepared to go back to the uk. He has told me he will sell the house and forward the money on !!! So as far as i'm concerned i'm stuck because i have kids and will be taking them away for my reasons.
I was such a bubbly, outgoing, enjoy life person until i came here now i'm soooo different. I work p/t which hasnt really helped. I had 2 good days over the weekend and felt fine but its come over me again today and have had this continually for 3 months now. I have just been looking at houses back home and the local paper to see pics etc, sad!!! We have friends but they are not really people who i would have as friends and dont feel i can have a good time with. I know that if i was in the uk i wouldnt be with these people and they are all english and in my opinion competing with each other which i havent got the energy to do...!!!!!
I'm trying to be postive but am finding it hard everyday so who knows for us both what will happen...
#58
Re: 3 months;could'nt hack it! back in Uk
Like some other posts, we want to go home too. We have been here 5 months, and i just cant stand it at the moment. We have family here and thought because of that it would be so much easier and make it a little less stressful. The problem is my cousins were all born here and have been brought up in an aussie way, and i have realised we have nothing in common as have had completley different upbringings, so have different attitudes and morals and outlooks etc. They expect us to change and get into their way of thinking but its too hard when you are what you are. We left a nice lifestyle in scotland with financial security, and have done nothing but struggle here, we did not expect it to be easy but it has really put into perspective what we had and we took it all for granted. Our family here in Aus think we have no sense of reality and think we had it handed to us on a plate back home, when in fact we both worked our backsides off, they cant see how or why we would be homesick or would look back, but we do and that is that. The problem is we have a friends coming over in october but if it was not for that, we would be home by now, as its just not for us. Some people know and some dont, some people just take longer to get used to it, but we know where our bread was buttered. And now i sometimes wish we had never spent those 5 yrs planning to get here, as its not what we thought it would be for us. I suppose we had to come to get it out our system as we always wanted to come here, but i'm making myself ill, from anxiety and crying and mygrains etc and thats not normal behaviour.
So some people just Know !, whats for them and whats not.
sj
So some people just Know !, whats for them and whats not.
sj
#59
Home and Happy
Joined: Dec 2002
Location: Keep true friends and puppets close, trust no-one else...
Posts: 93,810
Re: 3 months;could'nt hack it! back in Uk
Like some other posts, we want to go home too. We have been here 5 months, and i just cant stand it at the moment. We have family here and thought because of that it would be so much easier and make it a little less stressful. The problem is my cousins were all born here and have been brought up in an aussie way, and i have realised we have nothing in common as have had completley different upbringings, so have different attitudes and morals and outlooks etc. They expect us to change and get into their way of thinking but its too hard when you are what you are. We left a nice lifestyle in scotland with financial security, and have done nothing but struggle here, we did not expect it to be easy but it has really put into perspective what we had and we took it all for granted. Our family here in Aus think we have no sense of reality and think we had it handed to us on a plate back home, when in fact we both worked our backsides off, they cant see how or why we would be homesick or would look back, but we do and that is that. The problem is we have a friends coming over in october but if it was not for that, we would be home by now, as its just not for us. Some people know and some dont, some people just take longer to get used to it, but we know where our bread was buttered. And now i sometimes wish we had never spent those 5 yrs planning to get here, as its not what we thought it would be for us. I suppose we had to come to get it out our system as we always wanted to come here, but i'm making myself ill, from anxiety and crying and mygrains etc and thats not normal behaviour.
So some people just Know !, whats for them and whats not.
sj
So some people just Know !, whats for them and whats not.
sj
Hugs
#60
Master of verbal pish©
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 22,198
Re: 3 months;could'nt hack it! back in Uk
Like some other posts, we want to go home too. We have been here 5 months, and i just cant stand it at the moment. We have family here and thought because of that it would be so much easier and make it a little less stressful. The problem is my cousins were all born here and have been brought up in an aussie way, and i have realised we have nothing in common as have had completley different upbringings, so have different attitudes and morals and outlooks etc. They expect us to change and get into their way of thinking but its too hard when you are what you are. We left a nice lifestyle in scotland with financial security, and have done nothing but struggle here, we did not expect it to be easy but it has really put into perspective what we had and we took it all for granted. Our family here in Aus think we have no sense of reality and think we had it handed to us on a plate back home, when in fact we both worked our backsides off, they cant see how or why we would be homesick or would look back, but we do and that is that. The problem is we have a friends coming over in october but if it was not for that, we would be home by now, as its just not for us. Some people know and some dont, some people just take longer to get used to it, but we know where our bread was buttered. And now i sometimes wish we had never spent those 5 yrs planning to get here, as its not what we thought it would be for us. I suppose we had to come to get it out our system as we always wanted to come here, but i'm making myself ill, from anxiety and crying and mygrains etc and thats not normal behaviour.
So some people just Know !, whats for them and whats not.
sj
So some people just Know !, whats for them and whats not.
sj
or tell your friends that you wont be here when they get here and maybe you can help them out if they decide to cancel
good luck anyway guys