avanutria

Yeah, we used to skype but it was a frustrating exercise of dropped connections, endless ringbacks and always culminated in calling them anyway to try to help them with the computer problems. DH offered to buy them a new laptop which would be easier to use and the same OS as ours so we could troubleshoot more effectively but they didn't want to. So we haven't Skyped in close to a year now.

Ridski

Once every couple of months or so. Usually when the missus reminds me. my family's always been kind of close, but not that close, so we only get in contact every so often, and then it's mostly chit-chat. I have 3 sisters and a brother back the UK, and we're all on FB and never contact each other. In fact one of my sisters' updates got so depressing I stopped receiving feeds from her, poor cow.

But like everyone says, there's no norm. If it's been too long, your mum will make sure to remind you and make you feel guilty about it!

CAdreaming

Call my mum every day or at least every other day - and 2 friends every other day as well - got vonage so no call costs

Different strokes and all that..whatever works for you

Bob

So for those who married a local, how far do you live from their family? How often do they talk to folks?

The missus talks to her folks every week, for an hour or so, through Skype so they get to see the kids. They're up in Maine, get to see them every couple of months or so on average.

citizenmarie

Somehow putting this out here helped eased my mind a little. As most people have said, each to his own. I have to accept what's doable for me. Deep down I want that normal warm contact. But in reality it doesn't exist. Only in moments. More to accept I suppose ...

Yesterday I had it on my list: "call UK". But I thought, "why not ring when you feel remotely like it?" Otherwise it's very stressful, pretending. (And would I want someone to call me when they don't want to? No). So I decided to leave out the whole pressure of it's Easter (which I had put on myself/imagined), and call during lunch at work (I use Jajah from my cell phone, so costs pennies).

Well, that's what I did today. I found it helpful to be out walking around downtown near where I work when I called, and it didn't want to make me slash my wrists too much. And I also find it helps to set a time limit. 20 mins ideally. 30 mins I feel the knife coming out

Also: The positive side of calling every couple of months or so wakes me up out of my idealism, ie: wouldn't it be nice to visit...? And I realize, NO, it wouldn't! Every time I go there I die a little bit...

As for mum being lonely: she remarried a long time ago and loves to be alone, or so she has said over and over. She went a couple of years at least without wanting any contact, got rid of their phone, and wrote to tell me there wasn't enough room for me to stay over anymore (in their 4-bedroom house!). But that was in the mid-90s.

Still, hard to forget...

Titchski

Tough question that Bob! We live 2 hours from the MIL, FIL died 2 years ago, so it's handy being close enough if she needs stuff doing, but not too far away that she can chew my ear off in person. I talk to her on the phone weekly, mrs T talks to her daily.

Mrs T does not, however, talk to her sisters and brothers, due to the fact they're all grade A ****s who treat her like shit. Strangely, I have a great relationship with my ex brother in law who lives round the corner from MIL (confused yet?). This seriously pisses off my sister in law, so I do what I can to cultivate it

As for my lot, I talk to my parents once a week and text a couple of times a week (I'm an only child and have a decent relationship with them, so does mrs T for the most part). Cousins etc are all on Facebook so I generally chitchat on there and take the piss out of their Farmville stuff

SultanOfSwing

Within 20 miles for the most part, for her parents and siblings at any rate. SWMBO will be on the phone to one of them once every few days usually for some reason or another and we see them a bit less often. She has farther flung relatives in other states too, but quite a lot still live close by.

As far as my parents go, I'll talk to my ma on the phone maybe two or three times a month, usually she calls me, for baby updates and the like, but we'll email a bit more regularly. My sister is on FB so I send her photos of the baby there. My dad travels for work so he's out and about a bit more. I don't talk to him as much as I'd like, sadly.

The 3 of them will be out in July though

penguinbar

I talk to my mom once or twice a week. Haven't talked to my dad in about 3 years. He's a rotten bastard.

ldobson

Weekly via Skype. The key to skype is having a stable and consistant internet connection and quality cameras at both ends We engineered our setup to use the same skype certified cameras at both ends, we also both have fast and reliable internet connections to maximise the experience.

When on the road I use a macbook pro with an intergrated camera, which when tethered to my iphone creates a usable skype setup, however obviously not as great as the static setup at home.

Sally Redux

All very odd with mine.

Mum called me today because my Dad has gone to see his 'old pals'

Weird unreal conversations avoiding the elephant in the room at all times. I usually find at some point that I am hyperventilating and trying to avoid mental images of my hands closing around their throats.

hobbes79

I try and call home every couple of weeks. I use a calling card thing on my cell phone and call during my drive home on a Fri night. Can be a bit of a killer commute on Fri, so kills some time while I'm sitting in traffic. Talking to my Dad is nice. Talking to my Mum is not.

Do Skype about once a month so my mother can see the kids, which normally culminates in my mother talking over the kids, them getting bored and buggering off. Much like my phone calls with her.

MrEmjoy

Daily normally sometimes twice on skype, helps that my dad works in computing so he's normally at the computer.

We talk to my OH's dad and step mum weekly and her mum and step dad a few times a week.

Malashaan

I IM chat with my Dad pretty much everyday; we both sit at the computer pretty much all day. He tells me stuff about my Mother as well. She's not really a computer person so we don't communicate as much. She sends me the occasional email. We occasionally Skype call but my Dad doesn't seem to be able to get the video to work properly and my Mum's decided "there's no point if the video doesn't work." My Dad's pretty tech savvy but he has a blind spot when it comes to the fact his ISP/internet connection is terrible and he needs to change it. I've been arguing with him about that for years, back to when I was living with him.

They're coming over in 3 weeks to spend some time here and I hope to get back there sometime around Christmas or Spring 2012. I don't really miss much about England. Not that I didn't like it, I just have one of those personalities that settles in wherever I am. I was really close to my parents (only child) and I'm excited about them coming, but I don;t really miss them. I feel guilty about that, but it's the way I've always been. I talk to them online and that's enough for me. Other people need a lot more connection; so like others have said, whatever works for you is the right way to be. My Dad is in Leeds and my Grandmother is in Sheffield; they talk FAR less than he and I do.

MrEmjoy

My parents are coming over, in three weeks, from Leeds. Be funny if the coincidences continued! I also don't miss much from England other than the food and the Dales.

Cape Blue

Snap in almost every way.