anonymous0258

Hey all,

One of the reasons I came to Thailand was to find a nice, good, honest Thai Girl. I hate how most girls in the West & U.K in perticular to be very man like, drinking beer all time, drugs, etc I like a propper girl that has self respect and acts like a girl should act.

Any tips of finding a Thai girl like this to date? I find Thai girls are very shy.

bakedbean

moneypenny20

So what happened to your girlfriend from India?

bakedbean

phew...feel much better for that.

Pollyana

Probably dumped him for a good honest Thai bloke

moneypenny20

Maybe they could share a ladyboy?

nonthaburi

I have to laugh when I see posts like this , you seem to stereotype both UK and Thai women .

I've not lived in the UK for a long time so I can't really comment on that apart from saying that I have two sisters who I know fairly well .

As for Thai women , WOMEN RUN THIS COUNTRY ! never forget that ! Do not be fooled into thinking that Thai women are all subservient to the men and ' good ' girls .

As someone who has been married to one ( successfully ? ) for quite a few years now I can tell you that you are in for a few shocks as what you are looking for probably doesn't exist . Thais fart in bed too !

Gender roles may be more ' traditional ' here but it works both ways and YOU have to step up to the plate as well .

As for Thai girls being shy , I guess it depends who you are speaking to , it might be that they don't have a clue what you are going on about if you're speaking in English or they don't want to speak to you.

If you are serious about finding a nice girl try learning the language and take your time to get to know someone .

nonthaburi

there's one born every minute !

siriwanjs

My advise (as Thai) is looking for Thai educated girls. It's a shame to say this.. now a day many Thai girls are willing to marry westerners. The bars, the street or massage places are not the right place for the right Thai girl!

nonthaburi

Maybe I misunderstood your post but , why is it " a shame for Thai women to marry Westerners ? "

What is wrong with that ? From my own personal experience of living in Thailand for many years I think one of the best things for Thailand would be that Thai people were interested in " The Outside World " .

Of course , if people marry for the wrong reasons or those people come from the wrong places then that is different .

I have found many Thai people , once you get to know them to be quite candid and honest about the failings of Thailand and how it could be improved as a country . If you look at the recent problems over the past few years and the political instability then this is obviously a symptom of that .

siriwanjs

Thanks Nonthaburi for your comment and I read your many comments and you know Thais very very well.
I want to make sure you understand my point correctly and I might put the wrong expression words. There's nothing wrong for Thais women marry westerners. Actually I am the one, who has been married to US lawyer. I would like to explain what I think and experience. After Vietnam war, many of Thais women married to GI, and they moved to live aboard. Many of them 're bar's girls or prostitutes but they 're some of educated woman too( like Tiger Wood's mother). Most of them came back to visit their families in Thailand and of course they supported their families as much as they can as Thais culture. They built big houses, send money to their families. So.. by that times (I was young) if Thais women walked with Falang (westerners) people would think and looked at them as... awwww..( I think you understand) When I studied in university, my part time job was helping my teacher to translated letters. His office was nearby British embassy. We talked about about more than 30 yrs ago. We didn't have internet. I translated ton of letters and of course I learnt that there're million of stories in there, true and fake. I could tell every letters 're about money money. I understand everyone wants to have a better life. After graduated master degree in Thailand, my sister and I went to study in London and she married to an English doctor after she got her Phd. degree. When she came back to Thailand with her family, of course... the eyes of Thai people that looked at her still the same as... ummmm.. When time passed by, there're a lot of mix beautiful kids and they are so popular on TV as movie stars or singers. The thought of Thais had been changed since then. They think Falangs are rich and can make them have a better lives. I do believe Thais women are sweet and honest by Thais culture but values and individual differences are the things that Falangs have to think about. I would recommend, if you want to date Thais girls, take your time to know her. If someone asks for money when you guys are dating, it's a bad sign. Now I live in US and meet a lot of Thais girls who married to US gentlemen. What all they want is a better lives but if things are not what they think, they are looking for something's new! I hope you understand my points of view as Thais woman who married to Falang.

Alan2005

It's true. All western women are nothing better than drunken strumpets who don't appreciate what the larger and less attractive man can offer. You are right to try and find a nice demure Thai girl who will overlook these physical failings - have you tried kings castle 3?

siriwanjs

I am sorry that my English is so terrible especially my gramma. Pls forgive me. I just want to share my experience.

nonthaburi

No worries , good to hear from a Thai , not many on here really .

You raise some interesting points about the way that Thai / Western relationships are viewed . My wife has an aunt who married a G.I. after the Vietnam war . At that time there wern't really many foreigners around and the ways in which Thais would meet them were limited . In this Aunt's case she lived near one of the bases in Ubon Ratchatani .

I think things have changed so much in Thailand as far as relationships go in the past ten years or so mainly due to the internet but also the demographics of the people who are visiting Thailand . Whereas in the past visitors to the kingdom tended to be older males who , if they were going to meet Thais , then it would probably be in in tourist areas , whether that was in a bar setting or not . Also for Thais if they wanted to meet a foreigner then this would be their only option really . To go to a toursit area .

Even now there are stereotyped beliefs that Thais have about where Thais meet foreigners . I remmeber going to Isaan to live for the first time and the number of people who asked us if we had met in Pattaya was amazing . At this time I had never even been to Pattaya ! But they may have had a point because most of the foreigners who had retired in the area had all met their partners in Pattaya . Many of the women were quite obviously of a dubious background .

However , the internet has changed everything in my opinion . Firstly men don't have to go to a bar to meet a woman as was the case previously ( if you were on holiday , obviously if you were working in Thailand then many other options were available ) , there are so many websites set up for men to meet women in Thailand . People now have a lot more choice about how they meet and who they meet . This obviously works for Thai women too . I've been round the vilages in the middle of nowhere and there are women chatting online to pass the time . Maybe something will come of it for them , but they don't need to go anywhere else to do it .

I also think that Thailand is a very well known country for foreigners and whereas in the past the idea of going miles upcountry to visit someone may have been a bit daunting , nowadays it seems like foreigners are a lot more adventerous and willing to do that . I actually think this is a good idea as it will give you and idea of what the other person is like in their natural setting and what the family is like . And we all know how important the family is in any relationship with aThai , for better or for worse .

As I mentioned before , the demographics have changed a lot too . I'm going to use Bangkok as an example here because that is probably where the most foreigners live ( not holiday ), but there seem to be a lot more younger foregners now , and there are more women and the people who come to Thailand are a lot ' cleaner ' . A wider range of people are prepared to come and work in Thailand these days , especially when so many people can work online from home .

I think that attitudes of Thai women have changed too . Whereas previously a foreigner may have been a bit of a " mealticket " and viewed like that too . These days I think more Thai women are intersted in foreigners as people . Not all ,but more . You can see even in obscure subrbs in Bangkok that there are foreigners everywhere so Thais have a lot more exposure to foreigners so we are by definition easier to meet . There are more of us and we're in more places and we're younger .

But old attitudes do die hard . Even now if I am with my wife ( without our children ) we still get stared at , My wife would often say how people look at us like we're animals in the zoo . And you just know what people are thinking ; rentawife etc etc , even though we are similar in age . Children have changed things for us a lot though and people are a lot more accepting and no one will say a thing , and of course the children get a lot of attention wherever we go .

On the whole ( and I'm biased ) , I think Thais make great wives but so do good people evereywhere in the world . I would say to any foreigner to take things slowly . The biggest mistake I have seen so many foreigners make is to marry the first woman who smiles at them . Get to know the family too ; the second most important thing . Your relationship with the family can define your whole relationship .

I used to hate the big inclusive family thing when I was first with my wife , partly because I didn't understand a word they were saying ( they spoke Isaan whereas I spoke Thai ) , but also because we just don't really do things that way in the UK . Now though , I love it and I wouldn't want to do things any other way . Thais have a great ability to turn any mundane boring thing into good fun , and if you have a good Thai family then you will be having a lot of fun too .

I'm in Saudi Arabia right now and although I don't miss Thailand particularly ( spent too long there to miss it ) it is good to know that I will always have a home there , and it's only 6 hours on a plane after all !

bakedbean

I'd hit the karma button but it don't work on my iPod. Great post Nonthaburi. As always lots of common sense. Yeh it's complex; not black and white. What are you doing in Saudi? Hope you're. making lots of dosh