sending love to you all.
Jun 20th 2007, 7:17 am
#1
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Joined: Mar 2006
Location: el puerto, cadiz province
Posts: 312
sending love to you all.
I want to thank you all so much for the kind thoughts and love. This is the first year in spain for Madeline's birthday and I was dreading it. BUT. It is the best one so far (if that does not sound too odd).
LIly loves the day, she gets a pressie from her sister, and is very proud to tell everyone its her sisters birthday but she lives with god. ( bit embarrasing somtimes). We look through her memory box and read all the cards.
I did not cry once but I did have two panic attacks. Its like your body has a memory and you feel the shock again.
Then we went down to Gib and met our friends, we went to the playpark and had tea in morrisons and had a very frank discussion about why Madeliene died. ( The girls are fascinated about death and love hearing about it, this is quite normal for 4, 6 and 7 year olds).
thank you so much for letting me share this with you. The death of a child is not that unusual, we are just taught not to speak about it. I dont agree with that and we keep Madeline's memory alive every day. She was a baby when she died so we had no time with her, but what we have is hope.
I have a blood condition that attacks my pregnancy and body,( kind of like lupus) & years ago my doctors said you will never have children, they cant survive a pregnancy. Didn't we do well! Two children and over £80.000 pounds raised to support research in to pre-term delivery, stillbirth and miscarrige.
As I said Madeleine's death has given life to other children by enabling my consultant to look at what happened, it gave me the determination to have a family and so the specialists worked with me and the drugs I need to get through the pregnancy.
Dont give up on anything you do, if you want it hard enough you will get it. What ever happens in life, turn it around and carry on. Dont waste energy on worrying about the problem, use energy on finding the answer.
love to all
mary x x x xx
LIly loves the day, she gets a pressie from her sister, and is very proud to tell everyone its her sisters birthday but she lives with god. ( bit embarrasing somtimes). We look through her memory box and read all the cards.
I did not cry once but I did have two panic attacks. Its like your body has a memory and you feel the shock again.
Then we went down to Gib and met our friends, we went to the playpark and had tea in morrisons and had a very frank discussion about why Madeliene died. ( The girls are fascinated about death and love hearing about it, this is quite normal for 4, 6 and 7 year olds).
thank you so much for letting me share this with you. The death of a child is not that unusual, we are just taught not to speak about it. I dont agree with that and we keep Madeline's memory alive every day. She was a baby when she died so we had no time with her, but what we have is hope.
I have a blood condition that attacks my pregnancy and body,( kind of like lupus) & years ago my doctors said you will never have children, they cant survive a pregnancy. Didn't we do well! Two children and over £80.000 pounds raised to support research in to pre-term delivery, stillbirth and miscarrige.
As I said Madeleine's death has given life to other children by enabling my consultant to look at what happened, it gave me the determination to have a family and so the specialists worked with me and the drugs I need to get through the pregnancy.
Dont give up on anything you do, if you want it hard enough you will get it. What ever happens in life, turn it around and carry on. Dont waste energy on worrying about the problem, use energy on finding the answer.
love to all
mary x x x xx
Jun 20th 2007, 7:33 am
#2
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Joined: Mar 2007
Location: Costa Valencia
Posts: 14,795
Re: sending love to you all.
I am so glad that the day went well for you and that the children had fun. When a child is lost it is a shame that in our society we are taught to react as though they had never existed, it is so unhealthy. You do the right thing by your children and yourself by talking about your daughter, she is an integral part of who you are, what makes you tick and how you react to different issues.
Thought of you constantly yesterday and was hoping that the day was panning out alright for you all.
Rosemary
Thought of you constantly yesterday and was hoping that the day was panning out alright for you all.
Rosemary
Jun 20th 2007, 8:19 am
#3
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Joined: May 2007
Location: Up in the mountains outside Cocentaina..and loving it!
Posts: 886
Re: sending love to you all.
Firstly, can I say that I think you have been fantastic in the way you remember your daughter...as you say, so many people close the door on all memories, and that is just so wrong!
As for the above quote; I couldn't agree more! I think it will become my mantra in life!
Sally
Jun 20th 2007, 9:21 am
#4
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Joined: Oct 2006
Location: Benalmadena Pueblo Spain
Posts: 991
Re: sending love to you all.
Hi Maryann, just catching up after being away and read your posts.
I can not find the words to express how I would feel/cope with a loss of a child, my thoughts are with you, and a Karma for you
I can not find the words to express how I would feel/cope with a loss of a child, my thoughts are with you, and a Karma for you
Jun 20th 2007, 11:33 am
#5
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Joined: May 2006
Location: ex ex-pat, in Taunton
Posts: 27,197
Re: sending love to you all.
I want to thank you all so much for the kind thoughts and love. This is the first year in spain for Madeline's birthday and I was dreading it. BUT. It is the best one so far (if that does not sound too odd).
LIly loves the day, she gets a pressie from her sister, and is very proud to tell everyone its her sisters birthday but she lives with god. ( bit embarrasing somtimes). We look through her memory box and read all the cards.
I did not cry once but I did have two panic attacks. Its like your body has a memory and you feel the shock again.
Then we went down to Gib and met our friends, we went to the playpark and had tea in morrisons and had a very frank discussion about why Madeliene died. ( The girls are fascinated about death and love hearing about it, this is quite normal for 4, 6 and 7 year olds).
thank you so much for letting me share this with you. The death of a child is not that unusual, we are just taught not to speak about it. I dont agree with that and we keep Madeline's memory alive every day. She was a baby when she died so we had no time with her, but what we have is hope.
I have a blood condition that attacks my pregnancy and body,( kind of like lupus) & years ago my doctors said you will never have children, they cant survive a pregnancy. Didn't we do well! Two children and over £80.000 pounds raised to support research in to pre-term delivery, stillbirth and miscarrige.
As I said Madeleine's death has given life to other children by enabling my consultant to look at what happened, it gave me the determination to have a family and so the specialists worked with me and the drugs I need to get through the pregnancy.
Dont give up on anything you do, if you want it hard enough you will get it. What ever happens in life, turn it around and carry on. Dont waste energy on worrying about the problem, use energy on finding the answer.
love to all
mary x x x xx
LIly loves the day, she gets a pressie from her sister, and is very proud to tell everyone its her sisters birthday but she lives with god. ( bit embarrasing somtimes). We look through her memory box and read all the cards.
I did not cry once but I did have two panic attacks. Its like your body has a memory and you feel the shock again.
Then we went down to Gib and met our friends, we went to the playpark and had tea in morrisons and had a very frank discussion about why Madeliene died. ( The girls are fascinated about death and love hearing about it, this is quite normal for 4, 6 and 7 year olds).
thank you so much for letting me share this with you. The death of a child is not that unusual, we are just taught not to speak about it. I dont agree with that and we keep Madeline's memory alive every day. She was a baby when she died so we had no time with her, but what we have is hope.
I have a blood condition that attacks my pregnancy and body,( kind of like lupus) & years ago my doctors said you will never have children, they cant survive a pregnancy. Didn't we do well! Two children and over £80.000 pounds raised to support research in to pre-term delivery, stillbirth and miscarrige.
As I said Madeleine's death has given life to other children by enabling my consultant to look at what happened, it gave me the determination to have a family and so the specialists worked with me and the drugs I need to get through the pregnancy.
Dont give up on anything you do, if you want it hard enough you will get it. What ever happens in life, turn it around and carry on. Dont waste energy on worrying about the problem, use energy on finding the answer.
love to all
mary x x x xx
Jun 22nd 2007, 10:20 pm
#6
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Joined: Apr 2003
Location: Extremadura
Posts: 1,742
Re: sending love to you all.
Been catching up today, Maryann.
Just wanted to say all power to you for having such an open, honest and determined attitude to your loss; and for helping your children to grow up wihout fearing the unknown and taboo subjects.
They'll be strong and compassionate people, which the world could do with.
You're so right about putting your energies into something positive
Sending you hugs
Sam xx
Just wanted to say all power to you for having such an open, honest and determined attitude to your loss; and for helping your children to grow up wihout fearing the unknown and taboo subjects.
They'll be strong and compassionate people, which the world could do with.
You're so right about putting your energies into something positive
Sending you hugs
Sam xx
