Catjo

Hi I've read some threads on here regarding getting permission from ex ( child father) to move abroad. But all the ones I've found are people moving to USA or Australia! I'm only wanting to move to Spain. My ex won't agree so today I paid my court fee and my application has been sent for! Can anyone help who has been through this! I've started to get a pack together of all the info I have and need! How likely am I to get a yes if it goes all the way toathird hearing???? Any help and advice will be good!!!!
Thanks

Cat

Rosemary

As Concierge for the Spanish section of BE I would like to say hello and welcome.

BE is a very large expat website, so if you have problems finding your way around we have concierges who will try to direct you. The moderators for the Spanish forums are Mitzyboy and Fred James, moderators are there to ensure that the site runs smoothly within the rules of BE. Problems and complaints should always be addressed to a moderador who will look into the matter and deal with it efficiently and fairly. Our members who post in the Spain Forums are friendly and helpful with a wealth of knowledge of the issues of living in Spain. At the top of the page you will find a quirkily named thread called Free Beer which is full of important and useful information. Hope you enjoy your time participating in the forums.

Please let me know if you need any further help.

Rosemary

fionamw

Just welcome, really.......sounds as though you've got your hands (and probably head) full with the pre-pre planning let alone anything else. Hopefully you'll get some help here.

strangemother

Hi there,

I can't offer any words of wisdom, but did want to say "hi" nevertheless as i'm going to be going through a very similar process to you in order to take my daughter to Spain. In my case my Solicitor has told me it will be pretty easy (my ex is currently in prison on a violent charge of GBH with intent), and no contact whatsoever.

It is technically child abduction to take a child out of the country for more than 4 weeks without consent of the father, even if it is to an EU country (and i believe, technically, even going from England to Scotland!).

I did used to work in family law and dealt with child custody cases and this kind of thing a lot, although i was only a secretary, not a Solicitor so can't really advise. All i know is that the less he is involved in your child's life, the better for your case, and that you will need to show the court that you are not just moving on a whim, that you have planned out where your child will go to school, where you will live, how you will get by, and that it is in your child's interest to go... as much info as you can get together in this regard i'm sure will help your case and show that you are a sane adult making a wise decision for you and your child's future.

Good luck, and do keep us updated

edit: also wanted to say that many cases i dealt with never actually got through that many hearings, depends on how reasonable the father comes across and how much involvement he has in it all but most seem to get resolved fairly quick, and those that don't tend to go in favour of the person who has the main responsibility for the child anyway (ie, you).... not always, there are lots of negative stories online, but usually as long as you can show you have thought about the best interests of your child who will be the focus of the judge's attention more than you or your ex.

Catjo

Hi thanks for the messages! She sees her dad once or twice a week! He dosnt show up At any school events! She is very excited about the prospect and has told him she wants to go! For 5 years he has just been hardwork and done everything he can to cause trouble in our lives!! My mum is also moving to Spain, my partner may have a job!! We have found a school and have a property which we have visited a few times!!! We're stuck in limbo and just want an answer either way!!!

Cat

strangemother

It's stressful and i can see why you want answers. It's going to be just one of those things though i think, just gotta wait and see what the outcome is and in the meantime collect together all the evidence you have and listen carefully to your Solicitor's advice as they will be tell you the best way to handle it. I know how horrible it is not having any certainty as you can't make plans, so hope it gets resolved speedily for you. I'd think it would go in your favour based on the little i can see here, you seem to know what you are doing and will have other family there too, plus you are by a long way the main carer, AND she wants to go also... that is a big deal. It's probably helpful to ensure routes of contact remain open between him and your daughter and would show the judge that you are thinking about him as a father too, make sure you clearly offer contact of some kind if he comes over to Spain, cards/letters/phonecalls, etc.

good luck.

Catjo

I am prepared to offer any kind of contact!! Does anyone know if at a directions hearing if the judge thought permission should be given then the judge can grant it there and then, or will it always go to a final trial heating if my ex dosnt agree ???

pepitasoba

hi there, I'm in the same situation and I really feel for you . have you sort anything out yet?

Rosemary

As Concierge for the Spanish section of BE I would like to say hello and welcome.

BE is a very large expat website, so if you have problems finding your way around we have concierges who will try to direct you. The moderators for the Spanish forums are Mitzyboy and Fred James, moderators are there to ensure that the site runs smoothly within the rules of BE. Problems and complaints should always be addressed to a moderador who will look into the matter and deal with it efficiently and fairly. Our members who post in the Spain Forums are friendly and helpful with a wealth of knowledge of the issues of living in Spain. At the top of the page you will find a quirkily named thread called Free Beer which is full of important and useful information. Hope you enjoy your time participating in the forums.

Please let me know if you need any further help.

Rosemary

Catjo

Hi pepitasoba what stage are you at?? How is it all going for you?

Cat

fionamw

As I think I posted earlier, I know nothing of any of this but wanted you to know there are folk interested in your plight.

bob_bob

Your daughter sees her dad once or twice a week?, how often will she see him per year if you move?

Catjo

As much as is possible.. I don't mean to offend but I'm looking for advice not silly questions which seem to be judging me!!

Thanks

bob_bob

Not judging you but do think your asking a lot of the bloke if he is in weekly contact with the lass, you'd have a hell of a fight on your hands if you tried that with me. Out of order in my humble opinion.

As for advice? Stay in the UK and encourage the relationship with the father.

Catjo

Maybe you would be a better dad than him.... You don't know the circumstances so really shouldn't pass comment!!! He barely has a relationship with her!! He is given ample opportunity to have extra contact but dosnt take it, his work comes first and he dosnt attend school events!!!And at her age if she is more than willing to go surely that says something!!! So please stop passing your negative comments on what is already a stressfull matter!!!!

Thanks