Feeling fed up and lonely
Apr 7th 2010, 6:00 pm
#16
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Aug 2006
Location: Torrevieja & Los Altos, Spain. Formaly from Wembley, London, UK
Posts: 390
Re: Feeling fed up and lonely
I feel very lonely as well, we have no neighbours only holiday homes, and I dont drive
Mar 28th 2011, 3:49 pm
#17
Just Joined
Joined: Mar 2011
Location: Catalunya, By the sea
Posts: 24
Re: Feeling fed up and lonely
When we moved to spain we decided on a house in the campo, huge mistake, when we saw the house we loved it and the fantastic fews. The house is not remote we are just on the side of a road. The problem is since moving here i havnt driven, we had 2 big cars and i didnt want to drive them. My hubby is out at work all day so i spend everyday on my own. When he is not so busy with work he will drop me off to have a coffee with freinds, but that is not very often. As each day goes by i am feeling more and more fed up and missing my family and freinds so much in the uk. I can see a divorce coming as my husband loves it here so much although he does worry about me spending so much time on my own. We are hoping to buy a smaller car soon so maybe it will get better. Does any one else feel lonely where they live.
If you really want to move away, why not try renting on the coast? If monay is a problem maybe you could rent your house out to cover the cost. Oh, and another thought just came to me, until you get your confidence, why don't you get a lift into town with your husband when he goes to work and spend the time there, doing a course or meeting up with friends.
Whatever you decide to do, just remember you're not alone.
Mar 28th 2011, 5:31 pm
#18
Forum Regular
Joined: Oct 2010
Location: Jaen
Posts: 197
Re: Feeling fed up and lonely
I have had five and a half years of this - I just can't afford to move to an area where there are more English-speaking folk. I have been to the three or four largest towns around here and asked at the town hall if there are any expats living in or near. They won't tell me because of 'confidentiality' reasons (that's a first). I have put up notices - after asking permission - in libraries but to no avail. I guess that not many expats visit Spanish libraries.
Jaen has hardly any expats. I blame myself for not realizing how difficult life would be without a good gossip now and again.
People around here are friendly - but not to the point of inviting you into their homes or to take part in their celebrations. Invites to my house are politely declined.
There is always the lottery!!!
Jaen has hardly any expats. I blame myself for not realizing how difficult life would be without a good gossip now and again.
People around here are friendly - but not to the point of inviting you into their homes or to take part in their celebrations. Invites to my house are politely declined.
There is always the lottery!!!
Mar 28th 2011, 5:42 pm
#19
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 1,590
Re: Feeling fed up and lonely
I have had five and a half years of this - I just can't afford to move to an area where there are more English-speaking folk. I have been to the three or four largest towns around here and asked at the town hall if there are any expats living in or near. They won't tell me because of 'confidentiality' reasons (that's a first). I have put up notices - after asking permission - in libraries but to no avail. I guess that not many expats visit Spanish libraries.
Jaen has hardly any expats. I blame myself for not realizing how difficult life would be without a good gossip now and again.
People around here are friendly - but not to the point of inviting you into their homes or to take part in their celebrations. Invites to my house are politely declined.
There is always the lottery!!!
Jaen has hardly any expats. I blame myself for not realizing how difficult life would be without a good gossip now and again.
People around here are friendly - but not to the point of inviting you into their homes or to take part in their celebrations. Invites to my house are politely declined.
There is always the lottery!!!
Mar 28th 2011, 5:54 pm
#20
Forum Regular
Joined: Oct 2010
Location: Jaen
Posts: 197
Re: Feeling fed up and lonely
The Province - Baeza. It's a 365-day a year magnet for tourists but I can find no-one who is an expatriate who lives here. Beautiful place though. I sometimes go a bit further up the road to shop - Carrefour in Ubeda - and often hear English spoken. I do say 'hello' and chat for a while but they turn out to be just staying overnight and are shopping for snacks et al before moving on to somewhere else in the morning. As I said previously - my own fault - c'est la vie - wrong language but I don't know the Spanish for it.
Mar 28th 2011, 6:03 pm
#21
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 1,590
Re: Feeling fed up and lonely
The Province - Baeza. It's a 365-day a year magnet for tourists but I can find no-one who is an expatriate who lives here. Beautiful place though. I sometimes go a bit further up the road to shop - Carrefour in Ubeda - and often hear English spoken. I do say 'hello' and chat for a while but they turn out to be just staying overnight and are shopping for snacks et al before moving on to somewhere else in the morning. As I said previously - my own fault - c'est la vie - wrong language but I don't know the Spanish for it.
Mar 28th 2011, 6:04 pm
#22
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 5,368
Re: Feeling fed up and lonely
The Province - Baeza. It's a 365-day a year magnet for tourists but I can find no-one who is an expatriate who lives here. Beautiful place though. I sometimes go a bit further up the road to shop - Carrefour in Ubeda - and often hear English spoken. I do say 'hello' and chat for a while but they turn out to be just staying overnight and are shopping for snacks et al before moving on to somewhere else in the morning. As I said previously - my own fault - c'est la vie - wrong language but I don't know the Spanish for it.
c'est la vie- Así es la vida.
Mar 28th 2011, 6:17 pm
#23
Banned
Joined: Feb 2008
Location: Vejer de la Fra., Cadiz
Posts: 7,653
Re: Feeling fed up and lonely
I did at least stay for several nights when we stayed in Baeza! Nice places, loads of history, both Baeza and Úbeda, but not sure I'd want to live there. Olive trees as far as the eye can see! Don't know if it's still the same in Baeza, but we had never seen so many Guardia Civil, it was a while before we realised they had a training school/barracks there!
c'est la vie- Así es la vida.
c'est la vie- Así es la vida.
Mar 28th 2011, 6:19 pm
#24
Senior Moment
Joined: Jan 2006
Location: On the edge
Posts: 20,460
Re: Feeling fed up and lonely
This may sound a bit silly, but why not get a bike? If you don't live somewhere too hilly it's a good idea and keeps you in shape too. Also the driving lessons are a good idea, if your Spanish isn't that good you can always find an instructor who speaks English.
If you really want to move away, why not try renting on the coast? If monay is a problem maybe you could rent your house out to cover the cost. Oh, and another thought just came to me, until you get your confidence, why don't you get a lift into town with your husband when he goes to work and spend the time there, doing a course or meeting up with friends.
Whatever you decide to do, just remember you're not alone.
If you really want to move away, why not try renting on the coast? If monay is a problem maybe you could rent your house out to cover the cost. Oh, and another thought just came to me, until you get your confidence, why don't you get a lift into town with your husband when he goes to work and spend the time there, doing a course or meeting up with friends.
Whatever you decide to do, just remember you're not alone.
Mar 28th 2011, 6:22 pm
#25
RETIRED ;-))
Joined: Jul 2003
Location: Benalmadena Pueblo,Spain
Posts: 20,156
Mar 28th 2011, 6:46 pm
#26
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Joined: Apr 2009
Posts: 7,749
Re: Feeling fed up and lonely
The Province - Baeza. It's a 365-day a year magnet for tourists but I can find no-one who is an expatriate who lives here. Beautiful place though. I sometimes go a bit further up the road to shop - Carrefour in Ubeda - and often hear English spoken. I do say 'hello' and chat for a while but they turn out to be just staying overnight and are shopping for snacks et al before moving on to somewhere else in the morning. As I said previously - my own fault - c'est la vie - wrong language but I don't know the Spanish for it.
After 5 and a half years in a town where no English is spoken I am surprised that you are not fluent in Spanish. Maybe the best thing would be to get some books out, watch Spanish TV and to get a tandem partner, I am sure someone in Baeza would like you to teach them English - and you would learn Spanish
Mar 28th 2011, 10:23 pm
#27
Forum Regular
Joined: Dec 2007
Location: El Puerto de Santa Maria, Cadiz
Posts: 128
Re: Feeling fed up and lonely
5 years, you should have been fluent by now. You haven't helped yourself there at all.
Mar 28th 2011, 11:15 pm
#28
Forum Regular
Joined: Mar 2011
Location: Moraira
Posts: 30
Re: Feeling fed up and lonely
I do hope Im not breaking any code of conduct here, and please excuse me if I am (first time user), but given that this started a year ago, and that was the last heard from 1debbie2, does anyone know what happened? or isn't this site/forum for such questions? perhaps I misunderstood the point of the site altogether (no pun intended).
Mar 29th 2011, 5:23 am
#29
¿Dónde estoy?
Joined: Jun 2004
Location: my paradise - Jávea
Posts: 13,330
Re: Feeling fed up and lonely
I do hope Im not breaking any code of conduct here, and please excuse me if I am (first time user), but given that this started a year ago, and that was the last heard from 1debbie2, does anyone know what happened? or isn't this site/forum for such questions? perhaps I misunderstood the point of the site altogether (no pun intended).
Mar 29th 2011, 5:46 pm
#30
Forum Regular
Joined: Oct 2010
Location: Jaen
Posts: 197
Re: Feeling fed up and lonely
I have helped myself as much as I could given my age and how things don't 'gel' as much as they used to. I can hold my own with the doctor, the vet and the dentist and shopping is a breeze but the Andaluz accent here is very thick and not easy to understand given the speed at which it is delivered. This place is lovely but, in the street where I live, there are neighbours who stand on each others doorstep and natter - and never go into each others houses. One of the nicest neighbours tells me that she has been in this street for 40 years and has never been inside her neighbours houses! What chance do I have? Please don't think that I have not tried - I really have but to no avail.