rugbymatt

As if I needed proof that this "recession" isn't as bad figures released today show that while the amount of food we waste as consumers has fallen it still lies at around the £12 billion mark... We cant all be suffering that much or that figure would be a hell of a lot lower!

Domino

with that attitude, I must assume you don't make a couple of cents on your expenses, if you are claiming mileage you don't include the trip to McDonalds with wife and kids, you only use your company pen for company business, you never have company notepad in the living room, dont use company laptop for private business, don't mix company and private small change.

You are so squeeeeekkkyyy clean with a chinese wall between private and business. And your accountant confirms that.

So you are a Franciscan monk, living off the community.........

rugbymatt

Firstly... Since I have not sat bleating on about how evil the MP's are for doing what they did your assessment makes absolutely no sense, no matter how colourful it is.... personally I think the whole thing was a mess, we lost something in the whole mess that is still yet to be felt, experience, we lost, for the sake of a few thousand quid in many cases, wise old campaigners who could see the long game rather than the short, single term attitude that politicians now do....

Secondly... and not that its anything to do with you, but no... I don't, on more than one occasion I have sat with a friend in a pub and he has asked for my receipt so that he can claim the dinner as an expense... he does that because he knows I wont. My accountant (when I had one, I self asses now) would constantly tell me to claim a little extra because if I didn't HRMC would get suspicious.

Dick Dasterdly

Ah, so aiding and abetting, eh what ?

....or do you just tell him to naff off ?

rugbymatt

I never said I was whiter than white, but fiddle taxes? No....

Domino

sounds like theft from employer is fine, it isnt benefit fraud.

but when receiving benefits, which are mostly taxable, there is an income so the state is the "employer"

defrauding the employer can decrease his profits on which he pays taxation, which goes to pay benefits (with many other things) which means less money for the public purse.

does anyone know someone out of a job who would like a few squids to come round and scrub out the bird island on my pond ??

Dick Dasterdly

Most ppl.seem to be of the view that fiddling taxes is hardly a crime at all, especially in view of the way they believe the govt is fiddling them.

Whether or not fiddling is justifiable is debatable often depending on how you view the govts conduct, however having had some experience of tax regimes in a few other N. EU countries, I have come to the conclusion that our UK tax regime is not quite so bad after all.

bil

Fiddling taxes is very dangerous and can cost you a packet if they find out. Personally I always preferred to sleep peacefully in my bed.

In the 30 years I was in business, all the cash went thru the books, and we had three major tax investigations. In all we were caught out in 1 genuine error in one investigation, and apart from that we were always in the clear.

What astounded me was the fact that I knew what went on with several of my competitors. I was given the chance to buy several of them, and in each case, tho I had no intention of buying, I took the opportunity to look interested and give their books the once over to see how well they were really doing. When I expressed surprise at how low their profits were, in every case they explained that the reason for that was the % of the work was cash that was simply trousered. This figure was never less than 30% and the highest was 50.

I could never understand why it was that I had a major inspection every decade, and none of the evaders ever did.

They couldn't have, because had the IR taken even the slightest glance at their books, the figures would have stood out like a whore in church.

Plus, the penalty would have been at the least that they would have had to pay the IR would have been 2x the amount they should have paid originally.

That kind of a bill would have put them out of business.

rugbymatt

I work for myself, who is my employer? Oh yeah, its me....

Dick Dasterdly

Ah, so you're one of them filthy rich boggers eh.
I've no fancy for cleaning the shite out of your duck houses, but let me know when they're on the menu, as I'm quite partial to a bit of crispy duck.

rugbymatt

Did you watch "Greek for a Week" mate?

There was a financial analyst on there who was saying that if we had a black money market like Greece we would see a reduction of around £70 billion from the tax takings of the UK.... thats roughly the budget of the NHS, the Police force and much of the MoD combined gone.... I wonder how many people would moan once there isn't a police force to call and complain that some thieving pikey has nicked their tools or plasma tv!

HBG

The reason our tax collectors are more successful than their Greek counterparts has little to do with British honesty. Our historical rulers have learned over centuries how to get the most out of their serfs, and public obedience levels have always been much higher in our Monarchy, rather than the Mediterranean countries, most of which have disposed of their Kings and Queens long ago.

You could argue that your tax no longer goes direct to the Monarch, but pays for other things, like free tooth extractions, housing benefit for the poor, or wars; and the Queen lo longer gets as much for the upkeep of her large family and palaces; and she even pays taxes, but that is really a cynical exercise to fool the serfs.

I'm an obedient serf, but I try to limit what taxes I have to pay as best I can, both in the UK and in Spain.

Domino

well understand a smerf had a bag packed ready for Philip of Greece if he should be needed
just a problem on which name is on his passport

rugbymatt

You know he isn't Greek don't you?

Domino

Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh, Earl of Merioneth and Baron Greenwich, was
born Prince of Greece and Denmark in Corfu on 10 June 1921
He was born the only son of Prince Andrew of Greece. His paternal family is of Danish descent - Prince Andrew was the grandson of King Christian IX of Denmark.

His mother was Princess Alice of Battenberg, the eldest child of Prince Louis of Battenberg and sister of Earl Mountbatten of Burma.

It was also recently announced he had been appointed Lord High Admiral.

http://www.royal.gov.uk/thecurrentro...edinburgh.aspx