Child Abducted

Old May 8th 2007, 9:51 am
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Default Re: child abducted

From some of the accounts, it was quite common for parents do it there as they felt safe as there had never been problems there before. Personally I wouldn't have done, I would have had friends around, or taken the kids with me, or taken it turns staying in. But she is an incredibly pretty child and someone determined as said would have taken her by whatever means.

Okay if they wanted to go out, they could have left the children with a babysitter who was a stranger to them and who they didn't know who they hang out with. Who is to say the babysitter isn't dating some oddball? Many parents do that, leave their kids with babysitters who are untrained in First Aid or emergency procedures. How many babysitters people leave their kids with, could keep a child alive until help came? But parents often don't think of that. Everyday parents leave their babies/toddlers in creches so that they can go back to work. These people are strangers and also in many cases unknown to them and there are reports of abuse there, which pop up. Yet parents continue leaving their kids with strangers. Maybe a parent should stay at home and look after their kids until the go to school instead of putting them in the hands of strangers which millions do. Are they equally selfish and negligent in not looking after their own kids which they wanted and then putting their kids welfare in the hands of strangers?

Something else that people do everyday in putting their kids at risk is giving them perscribed drugs for an ailment. How many test their kids for allergy reactions to the drug before forcing them to take it? Yet my brother's girlfriend had an allergy reaction to a prescribed drug had a heart attack and died. She was only 28. Yet everyday, parents give their kids pills not thinking about the consequences. I never take pills, yet I know many people who pop pills for any sneeze or cough and do the same to their kids without knowing whether it will make them ill, or even kill them.

So if people are going to throw stones, maybe they should also look at their own lives, to see how perfect they are in looking after their kids welfare, because I bet there are some holes in it.

Originally Posted by lynnxa
what you say is all true............but why make it easier for a potential abductor by leaving them alone in a strange place..........50 yards or 250 yards - they should not have been alone

Last edited by Mercedes; May 8th 2007 at 9:54 am.
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Old May 8th 2007, 9:59 am
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Default Re: child abducted

Originally Posted by Mercedes
From some of the accounts, it was quite common for parents do it there as they felt safe as there had never been problems there before. Personally I wouldn't have done, I would have had friends around, or taken the kids with me, or taken it turns staying in. But she is an incredibly pretty child and someone determined as said would have taken her by whatever means.

Okay if they wanted to go out, they could have left the children with a babysitter who was a stranger to them and who they didn't know who they hang out with. Who is to say the babysitter isn't dating some oddball? Many parents do that, leave their kids with babysitters who are untrained in First Aid or emergency procedures. How many babysitters people leave their kids with, could keep a child alive until help came? But parents often don't think of that. Everyday parents leave their babies/toddlers in creches so that they can go back to work. These people are strangers and also in many cases unknown to them and there are reports of abuse there, which pop up. Yet parents continue leaving their kids with strangers. Maybe a parent should stay at home and look after their kids until the go to school instead of putting them in the hands of strangers which millions do. Are they equally selfish and negligent in not looking after their own kids which they wanted and then putting their kids welfare in the hands of strangers?

Something else that people do everyday in putting their kids at risk is giving them perscribed drugs for an ailment. How many test their kids for allergy reactions to the drug before forcing them to take it? Yet my brother's girlfriend had an allergy reaction to a prescribed drug had a heart attack and died. She was only 28. Yet everyday, parents give their kids pills not thinking about the consequences. I never take pills, yet I know many people who pop pills for any sneeze or cough and do the same to their kids without knowing whether it will make them ill, or even kill them.

So if people are going to throw stones, maybe they should also look at their own lives, to see how perfect they are in looking after their kids welfare, because I bet there are some holes in it.
supprised anyone reaches adulthood.... You can't just never do anything at all ie never give them a tablet or piece of bread incase they have allergies. But leaving children alone is UNACCEPTABLE whether on holiday or at home. Maddie being abducted is an extreme thing to have happened but what if she'd woken in a dark room scared or opened the appartment door and drowned in the pool played with daddies lighter and set the room on fire. those children were too young to be left alone there are no excuses
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Old May 8th 2007, 10:16 am
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Default Re: child abducted

I know, but I'm glad I grew up wheen you could take risks as a child without everyone worrying about being sued. I was often left alone to play etc whilst my mother was somewhere else. I grew up on a farm and many dangerous things there. But I survived.

Do parents watch their kids 24 hours a day? Horrible things happen even when the family are asleep in the house. The child could easily do all the things you mentioned when the parents are asleep, even morso if they had been drinking and had been in a heavy sleep. If they were as one report said only a few yards and checking on them every 30 minutes, then it would be no different to being in a garden downstairs having some drinks with friends, with the children upstairs in bed. Maybe all parents should have CCTV on their kids 24 hours a day, microchiped as well in case they disappear and all pedophiles put against the wall and shot in that way no accidents and horrible things would happen.




Originally Posted by jeanc
supprised anyone reaches adulthood.... You can't just never do anything at all ie never give them a tablet or piece of bread incase they have allergies. But leaving children alone is UNACCEPTABLE whether on holiday or at home. Maddie being abducted is an extreme thing to have happened but what if she'd woken in a dark room scared or opened the appartment door and drowned in the pool played with daddies lighter and set the room on fire. those children were too young to be left alone there are no excuses

Last edited by Mercedes; May 8th 2007 at 10:23 am.
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Old May 8th 2007, 11:03 am
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Default Re: child abducted

Originally Posted by Mercedes
microchiped as well in case they disappear and all pedophiles put against the wall and shot in that way no accidents and horrible things would happen.
Now those are both excellent ideas
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Old May 8th 2007, 1:45 pm
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Default Re: child abducted

Originally Posted by Mercedes
I know, but I'm glad I grew up wheen you could take risks as a child without everyone worrying about being sued. I was often left alone to play etc whilst my mother was somewhere else. I grew up on a farm and many dangerous things there. But I survived.

Do parents watch their kids 24 hours a day? Horrible things happen even when the family are asleep in the house. The child could easily do all the things you mentioned when the parents are asleep, even morso if they had been drinking and had been in a heavy sleep. If they were as one report said only a few yards and checking on them every 30 minutes, then it would be no different to being in a garden downstairs having some drinks with friends, with the children upstairs in bed. Maybe all parents should have CCTV on their kids 24 hours a day, microchiped as well in case they disappear and all pedophiles put against the wall and shot in that way no accidents and horrible things would happen.
The whole point about this case is that there was a FREE babysitting service where the children (all of them) would be looked after and NOT left alone. The people decided that they wouldn't take advantage of this as they thought that leaving them all alone, and checking every 30 mins would be OK. A child can drown or choke to death in less that 4 minutes. The FEW yards they were from the room was, apparently some 250 yards, and the room was totally out of site, also in a hotel you have no end of people wandering about both inside and outside, with no checks as to who they are, in your own home with friends, there are few or no other people aroung, and any strangers would usually be easily seen.
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Old May 8th 2007, 1:52 pm
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Default Re: child abducted

Is it worth arguing the toss over distance, fault, blame, incompetence or anything else to be honest, some will think its OK, others will condemn them to death, in another situation, on another day this would never have happened, and to be honest I personally think that if the child was snatched under other circumstances it would have made the news but not to the extent it has.

If you read some of the reports of it the media have yet again tarred and feathered the parents, now whether they deserve it or not, is that our decision to make? Are we all, and I am making a sweeping comment with all, so blameless or guiltless in our lives?

I know for one my sister in an absolutely excellent mother, and her 6 kids are a credit to her, but it didn't stop her husband driving over one of her children's heads on some gravel many moons ago.

I think the time for blame and recrimination will come, but for now why don't we just focus on what the poor child is going through?
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Old May 8th 2007, 2:10 pm
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Default Re: child abducted

Originally Posted by rugbymatt
Is it worth arguing the toss over distance, fault, blame, incompetence or anything else to be honest, some will think its OK, others will condemn them to death, in another situation, on another day this would never have happened, and to be honest I personally think that if the child was snatched under other circumstances it would have made the news but not to the extent it has.

If you read some of the reports of it the media have yet again tarred and feathered the parents, now whether they deserve it or not, is that our decision to make? Are we all, and I am making a sweeping comment with all, so blameless or guiltless in our lives?

I know for one my sister in an absolutely excellent mother, and her 6 kids are a credit to her, but it didn't stop her husband driving over one of her children's heads on some gravel many moons ago.

I think the time for blame and recrimination will come, but for now why don't we just focus on what the poor child is going through?
I do agree accidents happen my wife hit our son around the head with a spade i some months ago hit him with a large wooden beam luckily when i hit him he had a hard hat on and we have now both got used to the idea of checking were he is before we move. The cats had me over my ass down the stairs a few times.

But one does wonder it was a group of doctors with children how many other children that evening may have been left alone. The family's could of taken it in turns to baby sit all or used the available baby sitting service. Or not gone out My wife and i have not been out for dinner for some time because we have yet to meet someone we would feel comfortable with our children our neighbours have offered but they smoke so much dope that they are rarely watching their own children we would not leave ours with them. So we enjoy life at home with our children with us knowing that they are safe.
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Old May 8th 2007, 2:36 pm
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Default Re: child abducted

Originally Posted by Ka Ora!
I do agree accidents happen my wife hit our son around the head with a spade i some months ago hit him with a large wooden beam luckily when i hit him he had a hard hat on and we have now both got used to the idea of checking were he is before we move. The cats had me over my ass down the stairs a few times.

But one does wonder it was a group of doctors with children how many other children that evening may have been left alone. The family's could of taken it in turns to baby sit all or used the available baby sitting service. Or not gone out My wife and i have not been out for dinner for some time because we have yet to meet someone we would feel comfortable with our children our neighbours have offered but they smoke so much dope that they are rarely watching their own children we would not leave ours with them. So we enjoy life at home with our children with us knowing that they are safe.
I just find it a bit disconcerting that we are all discussing how evil the parents are when the facts are being drip fed to us by the British press, and the Portuguese police cant release any info yet.
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Old May 8th 2007, 2:36 pm
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Maybe they decided not to as they didn't feel the babysitter qualified enough etc and at the end of the day they are still putting their children's welfare in the hands of complete strangers. I'm not sure I would use a Free babysitting service either with people I didn't know. I think it is just as bad as leaving them alone.

The media reports vary too much to know what the exact truth is. But whatever, they made an error of judgement and are paying for it. I'm sure many on here have also made errors of judgements that could have had different outcomes if they had been unlucky. It is easy to say we wouldn't do this and that after the fact, but there are other things that people do with their kids that would make others horrified. Life is a risk and can be a harsh learning curve.


Originally Posted by mikelincs
The whole point about this case is that there was a FREE babysitting service where the children (all of them) would be looked after and NOT left alone. The people decided that they wouldn't take advantage of this as they thought that leaving them all alone, and checking every 30 mins would be OK. A child can drown or choke to death in less that 4 minutes. The FEW yards they were from the room was, apparently some 250 yards, and the room was totally out of site, also in a hotel you have no end of people wandering about both inside and outside, with no checks as to who they are, in your own home with friends, there are few or no other people aroung, and any strangers would usually be easily seen.
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Old May 8th 2007, 2:46 pm
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Default Re: child abducted

I have finally read all this thread and was wondering if I should post on it. All I can really say is that my heart and thoughts are with the little girl and I just pray she is ok. I do think the parents are totally irresponsible at leaving the children alone but whats done is done and lets just hope they find the little girl alive.
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Old May 8th 2007, 3:07 pm
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Default Re: child abducted

Originally Posted by Mercedes
So if people are going to throw stones, maybe they should also look at their own lives, to see how perfect they are in looking after their kids welfare, because I bet there are some holes in it.
Quite..I must say I have been quite sickened by the lack of empathy for the parents. There is risk everywhere. I often take my children to the park or soft play and am amazed at how many incidents occur where the parents are too far away, engrossed in magazines or conversing to actually notice anything is amiss.
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Old May 8th 2007, 4:28 pm
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Default Re: child abducted

My first post on this thread, I am not going to condone or condemn Maddie's parents at this moment in time, regardless of how foolish or neglective of their children they may seem. It is very easy for us to say in hindsight what is right or wrong and we all certainly have different standards that we live by.

I just wanted to pick up on the babysitting service that the holiday centre provided, does anyone know what that involved, I have stayed in holiday complex's and hotels that have offered baby sitting service and this has been based very much on what the parents did. A member of staff goes around the grounds checking on each room that has been logged as wanting this service on 1/2 hour or hourly basis, they have also had clubs for older children to attend until a set time. I just wondered if this was the case, they felt they could do this themselves on a more regular basis.

It really does not matter what any of us says or thinks about this, the facts remain the same, it happened and it will happen again in years to come because sadly for the watching public it will soon be forgotten until next time.
The one thing that has really stuck with me whilst reading all the threads on BE concerning this is The Cup of Human Kindness is far from over flowing. For every post on BE that has uttered disapproval on this irresponsible behavior, and found guilty, convicted and sentence pronounced on the parents I think we can be certain of the fact that what the parents are doing to themselves is tenfold and there will be no forgiveness in their own hearts for what they did on that evening.
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Old May 8th 2007, 4:35 pm
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Default Re: child abducted

Originally Posted by seasprite
Quite..I must say I have been quite sickened by the lack of empathy for the parents. There is risk everywhere. I often take my children to the park or soft play and am amazed at how many incidents occur where the parents are too far away, engrossed in magazines or conversing to actually notice anything is amiss.

In the 1970's I had two friends (2 mums) who went to the park with their 4 children aged 2, 3, 5 and 6 they had a lovely time there, had a picnic and played games with the kids, as the afternoon went on they were chatting keeping what they thought was a watchful eye on there children. They were still chatting when they packed away all the things to go home, they were aware of the children playing near by it was not until they called them that they realised the 2 year was not there. They found him face down in the little fish pond that was no more then a few metre away from them, he had climbed over the fence that was about 18 inches high and fell and was unable to left himself from the water. Sadly he was dead. Having lived through this with these parents I know that life can be both foolish and harsh.
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Old May 8th 2007, 4:42 pm
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Default Re: child abducted

Originally Posted by crispygirl

I just wanted to pick up on the babysitting service that the holiday centre provided, does anyone know what that involved,
according to the BBC website, the company provide a free creche service, but the parents didn't want to disturb the kids and they felt it wasn't fair to leave them with strangers.....

The babysitting service was an extra and someone actually sits with the kids till you come home. Thats what they say anyway.
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Old May 8th 2007, 4:56 pm
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Default Re: child abducted

Originally Posted by seasprite
Quite..I must say I have been quite sickened by the lack of empathy for the parents. There is risk everywhere. I often take my children to the park or soft play and am amazed at how many incidents occur where the parents are too far away, engrossed in magazines or conversing to actually notice anything is amiss.
Its all about risk assesment seasprite. When I bought up my daughter we assessed risks all the time. We decided for instance that it was too risky to leave her on her own at that age in a hotel room or whatever, and therefore never did. Some parents decide that the risk is acceptable. What you see here is the result of taking that risk .... it only happens now and again, but the risk is still there.
Hindsight is a wonderful thing for sure ...... but assessing risks for your kids is the smart route imho.
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