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Re: advise required
Originally Posted by jay01
(Post 9503032)
With your son still being at school, would you not be wiser staying there for him to finish his education, if he has been there since 9 he has grown into the international schooling in Turkey so you may screw his education up with moving him to Spanish International, they may not be at the same level, so are you being fair to his needs? :confused:
Have you asked him if he wants to move as he will have made friends, he will have picked up Turkish and established himself, it may be hard to accept but he may want to stay although he will go where you take him but he is the one that will suffer, you may well be better sending him to family in the UK so he can do his education there just in case you fancy a change in a few years and take him to somewhere else before his finishes his schooling. Spain is what you make it but it takes no prisoners especially where kids are involved, there are loads of British kids who have next to no education as they could not assimilate into school here, have little chance of getting work as unemployment is sky high and they have the protectionism attitude of Spanish first and that opens them to the dark side of Spain with drugs, gangs and trafficking. Just consider all the options before you make the move, look at schools at to what they can offer that is on a par to what he is getting in Turkey, not just where you want to be it is where he needs to be. Hang on I was not questioning her parenting ability, I was simply questioning why she would wish to move a child of 13 and why it should be such a big deal for it be done now and not something that can be left till they leave education. At no point have I been rude, offensive or otherwise, how the poster chooses to take it is for them alone and not yourself to judge Many people myself included have thought about moving with a child of such an age, many people have done just that and you can look at previous posts as to how successful or unsuccessful that is. Moving with a child of 9 and moving a child of 13 is totally different, sometimes people think it will be easy that children just pick up where they left off, but that is not the case. Just because it is an international school, you should not assume that they can pick up and carry on as usual, we all do things thinking we are doing it in the best interests of OUR children, to broaden their horizons, give them a taste of something different but it is also a parents right to do what is actually best for that child, should someone else not agree with that they are free to disregard that information, but it was still a valued point by the replies standards. I did point out that many children move due to being in the military and they DO have the same issues of not making friends easily which DOES effect them in adult life, which is why many children of military backgrounds now go to boarding school which is funded in part by the military. How badly children/adults are effected is dependant on that persons ability to integrate, some children have no issues others find it very hard and very distressing that issue does have to be brought up what they do with it is up to them. |
Re: advise required
Originally Posted by lynnxa
(Post 9504676)
my comment wasn't especially aimed at you - you just gave me the opportunity to make it
I think if a stranger has a go at someones parenting ability it's going to go down like a lead balloon, well meant or not. This thread has got very silly and I feel sorry for poor fiona. Maybe the thread should be deleted as it's adding nothing of benefit to any one anymore. |
Re: advise required
Originally Posted by twistedmelon
(Post 9504666)
It was tongue in cheek, not personal, the introduction of a concierge on the forum was to stop newbies getting beaten over and as good as the idea is, it still happens, as this thread shows.
Many,many children move from school to school, country to country because of their parents career, many of these because the parent/s are in the armed forces. To say that these parents are disadvantaging their children from selfish inconsiderate reasons is deeply insulting, surely. I felt , as did the OP, that jay01 went way over the top in judging the OP's parenting ability. The result is that the OP has probably left and fiona is clearly upset that she has been depicted as the culprit. It's all so:( .......isn't it? For every kid that has an advantage of the move there will be another who is put at a disadvantage. it isFact of life. surely it would be easier to decide on the general location or town and then look for schols, instead of finding the school and then moving lock, stock and barrel to where the school is. As children dont go to school forever and in the OPs case not for much longer it seems the wrong way round to go about things.:confused: wierd |
Re: advise required
Originally Posted by JLFS
(Post 9504730)
Why is insulting or wrong to say that parents who move their kids from country to country disadvantage their children.
For every kid that has an advantage of the move there will be another who is put at a disadvantage. it isFact of life. surely it would be easier to decide on the general location or town and then look for schols, instead of finding the school and then moving lock, stock and barrel to where the school is. As children dont go to school forever and in the OPs case not for much longer it seems the wrong way round to go about things.:confused: wierd I simply thought that jay01 was to heavy handed, as did the OP. Yes there MAY be SOME cases that SOME children MAY experience SOME difficulties, it's not a fact of life for ALL and it is the parents decision to decide what they feel is best for their child given their personal circumstances of which we have no knowledge and therein right to judge. |
Re: advise required
Originally Posted by twistedmelon
(Post 9504754)
I don't want to get drawn into these member arguements.
I simply thought that jay01 was to heavy handed, as did the OP. Yes there MAY be SOME cases that SOME children MAY experience SOME difficulties, it's not a fact of life for ALL and it is the parents decision to decide what they feel is best for their child given their personal circumstances of which we have no knowledge and therein right to judge. |
Re: advise required
Originally Posted by JLFS
(Post 9504759)
and there endeth the sermon for today:rofl::rofl:
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Re: advise required
Originally Posted by twistedmelon
(Post 9504768)
Amen and God bless us ALL:thumbsup:
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Re: advise required
thank you for all the genuine replys with good info . i am familiar with forums i am on a good one in turkey but its just the same you get good and ill informed judgemental on all . the comment that why dont i jump on a plane and find out for myself just about sais it all!! of course im going to come over im not stupid or that naive! this was a first attempt to touch base as the family only decided to look at spain this week, some people just need to stick to subjects they actualy can help on and let other more well meaning people who generaly want to help reply. I think i will give it a miss now once again thanks to all that gave good practical advise
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Re: advise required
Originally Posted by dailoukaat
(Post 9500982)
hi i live in turkey at the moment with my family we have lived there for the last 4 years and want a change i would realy like your advise on where i should be looking myself and my partner have an independent income although we would like to work if we can and we have a 13 year old that will need to go to an english or international school so would like to be fairly near would appreciate lots of advise and experiences and look forward to joining in this forum:)
I was going to advise send her to a Spanish school as I have experience of them, but as you have a bit of an attitude about unsolicited advice I won`t bother. ;);) |
Re: advise required
What is it with karma these days? I need to spread it around - and that's two of you I've tried for.......:lol:
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Re: advise required
Originally Posted by fionamw
(Post 9505295)
What is it with karma these days? I need to spread it around - and that's two of you I've tried for.......:lol:
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Re: advise required
Originally Posted by fionamw
(Post 9505295)
What is it with karma these days? I need to spread it around - and that's two of you I've tried for.......:lol:
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Re: advise required
Originally Posted by twistedmelon
(Post 9504312)
naladogs,
I think you have made a mistake picking on fiona she has said nothing wrong, it was jay01 who upset the OP and I can see why. I think you owe fiona an apology as you are doing what you say "others" here are doing, being disrespectful and in this case without justification. Where's a concierge when you need one;) Graham |
Re: advise required
Originally Posted by The Oddities
(Post 9505666)
In hospital for two weeks with Rosemary looking after me.
Graham |
Re: advise required
Originally Posted by lynnxa
(Post 9506135)
hope you're OK:wub:
Graham |
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