resident children; alien parents
May 24th 2004, 10:03 pm
#1
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Thread Starter
Joined: May 2004
Posts: 1
resident children; alien parents
My boyfriend and his ex-wife are English, in America on work visas. They were divorced in England in 1999, but both children were born in the U.S. The youngest child was born in the U.S. in 1999, but AFTER the divorce (long story--they all STILL live together). Apparently, there was no formal custody arrangement by the English courts. My boyfriend is afraid that if he asks his ex-wife to move out, that she will take both boys back to England. Can she do that? What rights does he have? What rights do the children have to remain in close proximity to their father (who doesn't want to move back to England)? Do U.S. Courts have jurisdiction? Can the U.S. Courts institute any sort of custody agreement given that neither parent is a citizen? Any help would be appreciated. I love him and want to be with him, but don't want to jeopardize his relationship with his children. However, the ex-wife living in his house is kind of an impediment for me at this point! Any help or guidance would be appreciated!
May 25th 2004, 5:18 pm
#2
Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 68,280
Re: resident children; alien parents
Advice!! Stop being gullible ..you are being used... the ex wife is living in THEIR house not his..He is afraid to ask her to leave as it most likely would end up he will be turned out...You are being used... been there ..done it..
May 25th 2004, 8:14 pm
#3
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Oct 2003
Location: Arizona
Posts: 961
Re: resident children; alien parents
Originally posted by adwest01
My boyfriend and his ex-wife are English, in America on work visas. They were divorced in England in 1999, but both children were born in the U.S. The youngest child was born in the U.S. in 1999, but AFTER the divorce (long story--they all STILL live together). Apparently, there was no formal custody arrangement by the English courts. My boyfriend is afraid that if he asks his ex-wife to move out, that she will take both boys back to England. Can she do that? What rights does he have? What rights do the children have to remain in close proximity to their father (who doesn't want to move back to England)? Do U.S. Courts have jurisdiction? Can the U.S. Courts institute any sort of custody agreement given that neither parent is a citizen? Any help would be appreciated. I love him and want to be with him, but don't want to jeopardize his relationship with his children. However, the ex-wife living in his house is kind of an impediment for me at this point! Any help or guidance would be appreciated!
My boyfriend and his ex-wife are English, in America on work visas. They were divorced in England in 1999, but both children were born in the U.S. The youngest child was born in the U.S. in 1999, but AFTER the divorce (long story--they all STILL live together). Apparently, there was no formal custody arrangement by the English courts. My boyfriend is afraid that if he asks his ex-wife to move out, that she will take both boys back to England. Can she do that? What rights does he have? What rights do the children have to remain in close proximity to their father (who doesn't want to move back to England)? Do U.S. Courts have jurisdiction? Can the U.S. Courts institute any sort of custody agreement given that neither parent is a citizen? Any help would be appreciated. I love him and want to be with him, but don't want to jeopardize his relationship with his children. However, the ex-wife living in his house is kind of an impediment for me at this point! Any help or guidance would be appreciated!
Sorry don't know anything about the laws on custody to UK parents in the US. I am sure someone will come on though and be able to point you in the right direction.
That is immaterial though, the fact that he is still living with her should raise a red flag in your head. Would not touch that with a ten foot barge pole.
May 25th 2004, 10:57 pm
#4
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Joined: Jul 2003
Location: California since 1997 now back in UK since July 2004
Posts: 1,398
Re: resident children; alien parents
As an English woman in California... I have seen this before...
He's a slime honey... no guts.... want's his cake and eats it is exactly right..... Probably comes across and a very nice caring guy which in reality is slime disguise....
As I have heard say by my 13 yr old...... Kick him to the curb....
There are plenty of single men out there with ex wives and kids.... BUT... They have left home, pay child support and have their own homes and great jobs...... It's called stability and being adult and independant...
As far as custody in USA... He could easily find out in 1 free phone call about that..... Yellow pages... family lawyer... free consulatation..... Not hard to fathom... sounds like he is just saying words to keep you and not leave her.....
Go out with your friends and have a great time... Live life to the full, without him... you deserve better...
He's a slime honey... no guts.... want's his cake and eats it is exactly right..... Probably comes across and a very nice caring guy which in reality is slime disguise....
As I have heard say by my 13 yr old...... Kick him to the curb....
There are plenty of single men out there with ex wives and kids.... BUT... They have left home, pay child support and have their own homes and great jobs...... It's called stability and being adult and independant...
As far as custody in USA... He could easily find out in 1 free phone call about that..... Yellow pages... family lawyer... free consulatation..... Not hard to fathom... sounds like he is just saying words to keep you and not leave her.....
Go out with your friends and have a great time... Live life to the full, without him... you deserve better...
May 26th 2004, 2:48 am
#5
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Posts: n/a
Re: resident children; alien parents
honeymommy <member12613@british_expats.com> wrote in
news:[email protected]:
>
> As an English woman in California... I have seen this before...
>
> He's a
> slime honey... no guts.... want's his cake and eats it is exactly
> right..... Probably comes across and a very nice caring guy which in
> reality is slime disguise....
>
> As I have heard say by my 13 yr old......
> Kick him to the curb....
>
> There are plenty of single men out there with
> ex wives and kids.... BUT... They have left home, pay child support and
> have their own homes and great jobs...... It's called stability and
> being adult and independant...
>
> As far as custody in USA... He could
> easily find out in 1 free phone call about that..... Yellow pages...
> family lawyer... free consulatation..... Not hard to fathom... sounds
> like he is just saying words to keep you and not leave her.....
>
> Go out
> with your friends and have a great time... Live life to the full,
> without him... you deserve better...
>
>
I know a woman from the UK who had a child by an American. She got custody
but could not take the child to live in the UK. Even if both parents were
British I imagine exactly the same thing would apply. Of course, actually
stopping them from leaving is not so easy ... at least if they don't care
about coming back.
news:[email protected]:
>
> As an English woman in California... I have seen this before...
>
> He's a
> slime honey... no guts.... want's his cake and eats it is exactly
> right..... Probably comes across and a very nice caring guy which in
> reality is slime disguise....
>
> As I have heard say by my 13 yr old......
> Kick him to the curb....
>
> There are plenty of single men out there with
> ex wives and kids.... BUT... They have left home, pay child support and
> have their own homes and great jobs...... It's called stability and
> being adult and independant...
>
> As far as custody in USA... He could
> easily find out in 1 free phone call about that..... Yellow pages...
> family lawyer... free consulatation..... Not hard to fathom... sounds
> like he is just saying words to keep you and not leave her.....
>
> Go out
> with your friends and have a great time... Live life to the full,
> without him... you deserve better...
>
>
I know a woman from the UK who had a child by an American. She got custody
but could not take the child to live in the UK. Even if both parents were
British I imagine exactly the same thing would apply. Of course, actually
stopping them from leaving is not so easy ... at least if they don't care
about coming back.
Jun 1st 2004, 6:26 pm
#6
Just Joined
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 10
Re: resident children; alien parents
Well you have proably heard enough of what kind of person he is so I am not going to repeat all that, as that is not the answer that you are seeking. The answer is yes, since they have been living in the US legally for that long then the US does retain jurisdiction as far as the Hague Convention but as far as custody it all depends on what the custody papers from England say. As for the Hagie Convention it restricts parents from abducting choldren from there place of Habitual Residence and I believe that habitual residence means where they have been living for the past 6 months. He needs to seek legal advice and quickly in order to get a custody and visitation order in place, cause without on all he can use is the fact that by her moving away she is restricted his access rights and for yourself think long and hard about what you are getting yourself into because it is a long road that he has ahead of him and alot of stress on you as well. Good luck!
Originally posted by Alun
honeymommy <member12613@british_expats.com> wrote in
news:[email protected]:
>
> As an English woman in California... I have seen this before...
>
> He's a
> slime honey... no guts.... want's his cake and eats it is exactly
> right..... Probably comes across and a very nice caring guy which in
> reality is slime disguise....
>
> As I have heard say by my 13 yr old......
> Kick him to the curb....
>
> There are plenty of single men out there with
> ex wives and kids.... BUT... They have left home, pay child support and
> have their own homes and great jobs...... It's called stability and
> being adult and independant...
>
> As far as custody in USA... He could
> easily find out in 1 free phone call about that..... Yellow pages...
> family lawyer... free consulatation..... Not hard to fathom... sounds
> like he is just saying words to keep you and not leave her.....
>
> Go out
> with your friends and have a great time... Live life to the full,
> without him... you deserve better...
>
>
I know a woman from the UK who had a child by an American. She got custody
but could not take the child to live in the UK. Even if both parents were
British I imagine exactly the same thing would apply. Of course, actually
stopping them from leaving is not so easy ... at least if they don't care
about coming back.
honeymommy <member12613@british_expats.com> wrote in
news:[email protected]:
>
> As an English woman in California... I have seen this before...
>
> He's a
> slime honey... no guts.... want's his cake and eats it is exactly
> right..... Probably comes across and a very nice caring guy which in
> reality is slime disguise....
>
> As I have heard say by my 13 yr old......
> Kick him to the curb....
>
> There are plenty of single men out there with
> ex wives and kids.... BUT... They have left home, pay child support and
> have their own homes and great jobs...... It's called stability and
> being adult and independant...
>
> As far as custody in USA... He could
> easily find out in 1 free phone call about that..... Yellow pages...
> family lawyer... free consulatation..... Not hard to fathom... sounds
> like he is just saying words to keep you and not leave her.....
>
> Go out
> with your friends and have a great time... Live life to the full,
> without him... you deserve better...
>
>
I know a woman from the UK who had a child by an American. She got custody
but could not take the child to live in the UK. Even if both parents were
British I imagine exactly the same thing would apply. Of course, actually
stopping them from leaving is not so easy ... at least if they don't care
about coming back.
Jun 1st 2004, 8:57 pm
#7
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Jul 2003
Location: California since 1997 now back in UK since July 2004
Posts: 1,398
Re: resident children; alien parents
The Hague convention is usually for parents of differing nationality, when one parent takes a child leaving the habitual residence....
Yes it will depend on the custody decision that was set in place in the UK, and to that matter to any further custody case set in place since then... Eg. in the USA....
If both parents are habitually resident in the US but are not citizens there could be a problem. The Uk 'MAY' not intervene if she takes them back to the UK, as they are all UK citizens... Won't matter if the children have dual nationality.... It is one of those loophole laws that are difficult to pin down....
I apologise if my previous post was a feisty one, but I have seen
children harmed through this sort of experience before.....
Basically if he wants to ensure the children stay in the USA should he leave his wife for you, is to go a see a Laywer. He needs to get advise on custody in the USA... It would also be advisable to contact the UK family law headoffice in the UK, and ask for advise from them too.... This way both bases are covered......
Good Luck....
Yes it will depend on the custody decision that was set in place in the UK, and to that matter to any further custody case set in place since then... Eg. in the USA....
If both parents are habitually resident in the US but are not citizens there could be a problem. The Uk 'MAY' not intervene if she takes them back to the UK, as they are all UK citizens... Won't matter if the children have dual nationality.... It is one of those loophole laws that are difficult to pin down....
I apologise if my previous post was a feisty one, but I have seen
children harmed through this sort of experience before.....
Basically if he wants to ensure the children stay in the USA should he leave his wife for you, is to go a see a Laywer. He needs to get advise on custody in the USA... It would also be advisable to contact the UK family law headoffice in the UK, and ask for advise from them too.... This way both bases are covered......
Good Luck....
Jun 2nd 2004, 3:12 pm
#8
Just Joined
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 10
Re: resident children; alien parents
I understand what you are saying and I agree, I also think that in visiting the attorney in the US he should try to apply for a change in jurisdiction, due to the fact that they both currently reside in the US and have for the past few years, this may be a possibility. Also make sure to get an attorney that is well versed in International law as this will be a key role. Best of Luck!
Originally posted by honeymommy
The Hague convention is usually for parents of differing nationality, when one parent takes a child leaving the habitual residence....
Yes it will depend on the custody decision that was set in place in the UK, and to that matter to any further custody case set in place since then... Eg. in the USA....
If both parents are habitually resident in the US but are not citizens there could be a problem. The Uk 'MAY' not intervene if she takes them back to the UK, as they are all UK citizens... Won't matter if the children have dual nationality.... It is one of those loophole laws that are difficult to pin down....
I apologise if my previous post was a feisty one, but I have seen
children harmed through this sort of experience before.....
Basically if he wants to ensure the children stay in the USA should he leave his wife for you, is to go a see a Laywer. He needs to get advise on custody in the USA... It would also be advisable to contact the UK family law headoffice in the UK, and ask for advise from them too.... This way both bases are covered......
Good Luck....
The Hague convention is usually for parents of differing nationality, when one parent takes a child leaving the habitual residence....
Yes it will depend on the custody decision that was set in place in the UK, and to that matter to any further custody case set in place since then... Eg. in the USA....
If both parents are habitually resident in the US but are not citizens there could be a problem. The Uk 'MAY' not intervene if she takes them back to the UK, as they are all UK citizens... Won't matter if the children have dual nationality.... It is one of those loophole laws that are difficult to pin down....
I apologise if my previous post was a feisty one, but I have seen
children harmed through this sort of experience before.....
Basically if he wants to ensure the children stay in the USA should he leave his wife for you, is to go a see a Laywer. He needs to get advise on custody in the USA... It would also be advisable to contact the UK family law headoffice in the UK, and ask for advise from them too.... This way both bases are covered......
Good Luck....
Jun 2nd 2004, 4:20 pm
#9
Forum Regular
Joined: Oct 2003
Location: uk
Posts: 75
Re: resident children; alien parents
Originally posted by adwest01
My boyfriend and his ex-wife are English, in America on work visas. They were divorced in England in 1999, but both children were born in the U.S. The youngest child was born in the U.S. in 1999, but AFTER the divorce (long story--they all STILL live together). Apparently, there was no formal custody arrangement by the English courts. My boyfriend is afraid that if he asks his ex-wife to move out, that she will take both boys back to England. Can she do that? What rights does he have? What rights do the children have to remain in close proximity to their father (who doesn't want to move back to England)? Do U.S. Courts have jurisdiction? Can the U.S. Courts institute any sort of custody agreement given that neither parent is a citizen? Any help would be appreciated. I love him and want to be with him, but don't want to jeopardize his relationship with his children. However, the ex-wife living in his house is kind of an impediment for me at this point! Any help or guidance would be appreciated!
My boyfriend and his ex-wife are English, in America on work visas. They were divorced in England in 1999, but both children were born in the U.S. The youngest child was born in the U.S. in 1999, but AFTER the divorce (long story--they all STILL live together). Apparently, there was no formal custody arrangement by the English courts. My boyfriend is afraid that if he asks his ex-wife to move out, that she will take both boys back to England. Can she do that? What rights does he have? What rights do the children have to remain in close proximity to their father (who doesn't want to move back to England)? Do U.S. Courts have jurisdiction? Can the U.S. Courts institute any sort of custody agreement given that neither parent is a citizen? Any help would be appreciated. I love him and want to be with him, but don't want to jeopardize his relationship with his children. However, the ex-wife living in his house is kind of an impediment for me at this point! Any help or guidance would be appreciated!
Can you ring him at his home freely and if his wife answers can you tell her who is calling and have her get him to the phone?
Can you call round for him at his home?
In other words if they are properly split up but living in the same house for convienience then there is no reason why his wife shouldn't know all about you. If you can't answer yes to these questions then "BIN HIM"
