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-   -   Worlds worst chat up lines (https://britishexpats.com/forum/sand-pit-116/worlds-worst-chat-up-lines-669432/)

kittycat1 May 23rd 2010 6:43 pm

Worlds worst chat up lines
 
Hands up if you've ever used one of the below

-Are you a parking ticket? because you've got fine written all over you
-Do you have a sticking plaster? I just scraped my knee falling for you
-If being sexy was a crime, you'd be guilty as charged
-My lips are registered weapons. Do you feel lucky?
-I'm not really this tall, I'm standing on my wallet
-When God made you he was showing off
-If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put U and I together
-Now before you run off, I'm not a freak
-There must be something wrong with my eyes. I cant take them off you
-You know what? Your eyes are the same colour as my Porsche
-Do you have a map? Because I just keep getting lost in your eyes
-The thing is, you are ugly but you intrigue me
-Do you have any raisins? No? How about a date?
-I must be in heaven because I'm standing next to you
-If you're going to regret this in the morning, we can sleep until the afternoon
-Hey baby, you've got something on your bum....my eyes
-Can I get a picture of you so I can show Santa what I want or Christmas?
-Can you see my pants? Do you want to?
-Are you as beautiful on the inside as you are on the outside?
-Are you lost? Because heaven's a long way from here
-Are you religious? Good, because I'm the answer to your prayers
-Would you like to be unique and different? Try saying yes
-Aren't you Tony the Tiger on the frosties' box? because you look grrrreat
-Ten-tonne polar bear...now if that doesn't break the ice, nothing will
-Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk by again?
-Would you take a look at those curves? And here's me with no brakes
-I seem to have lost my phone number - can I have yours?
-Apart from being sexy, what do you do for a living?
-Don't go in that building. The sprinklers will go off
-I'm choking! I need mouth to mouth quick
-Hey, you were great on Baywatch last night
-Good news. The test results have come back negative
-Do you like to dance? Well then, could you go dance so I can talk to your friend?
-Hi. I'm Mr Right. Someone said you might have been looking for me
-You've been a bad, bad girl. Now go to my room!
-Aren't we supposed to get together for a candlelit dinner later tonight?
-Hello, Cupid called. He says to tell you he needs my heart back
-Is there an airport nearby or is that just my heart taking off?
-Is your name Gillette? because you're the best a man can get
-Know what I like best about you, baby? You haven't CS gassed me yet
-Hi, my name is Fred Flintstone and I'm gonna make your bedrock!
-That's a nice shirt. Can I talk you out of it?
-Somebody better call God because he must be missing an angel
-If you were a new burger at McDonald's, you would be a McGorgeous

And the best put-downs:-
-Can I buy you a drink?
Actually, I'd rather have the money
-Didn't we go on a date once? Or was it twice?
Must've been once. I never make the same mistake twice
-How did you get to be so beautiful?
I must have been given your share
-Hey baby, what's your sign?
Do not enter!
-If I could see you naked, I'd die happy
If I saw you naked, I'd die laughing
-Go on, don't be shy. Ask me out
Okay, get out!

Anyone got any worse ones?

Madam Medusa May 23rd 2010 6:45 pm

Re: Worlds worst chat up lines
 
yeah, we've had a similar thread on here a while back...my worst was a lebo guy in cyprus when i was about 14 came up to me when i was swimming in the sea, took hold of a strand of my hair and said, "your hair is like gold but more precious..."...even then i knew that was just wrong, lol...

MM, xx

Confucius May 23rd 2010 6:46 pm

Re: Worlds worst chat up lines
 
Did it hurt, when I fell over you from heaven???

Inselaffen May 24th 2010 2:02 am

Re: Worlds worst chat up lines
 
How do you like your eggs in the morning?
- unfertilised!!

and there is the classis northern chat up line.

Fancy a f#ck?

The Dean May 24th 2010 3:50 am

Re: Worlds worst chat up lines
 
Austin Powers has some good ones..........

"Do you work for the Post Office? No?? That's funny - I'm sure I saw you checking my package........."

alitrist May 24th 2010 3:59 am

Re: Worlds worst chat up lines
 
-Do you feel tired?
-No, why?
-Because you've been running through my mind

Vice Lord May 24th 2010 5:38 am

Re: Worlds worst chat up lines
 
How about "you are the most beautiful woman i've ever seen and I want to make love to you right now"

That worked for me at the grocery store once.

TGFKASE May 24th 2010 5:42 am

Re: Worlds worst chat up lines
 
My face is leaving in 20 minutes, and I want you to be on it....

alitrist May 24th 2010 6:30 am

Re: Worlds worst chat up lines
 
"Would you like a drink?"

"Well, why don't you go buy one while I talk to your friend."

commander May 24th 2010 10:53 am

Re: Worlds worst chat up lines
 
"Do you like flowers?"

"well get your tulips round me cock"


Sid the sexest rocks:D

Cham128 May 24th 2010 11:43 am

Re: Worlds worst chat up lines
 
"do you have any spanish in you?

do you want some?"

"what winks then fk's like a tiger?"
*wink*

Roadking May 24th 2010 12:51 pm

Re: Worlds worst chat up lines
 
I must have had quite a bit to drink because you're beginning to look pretty good.

Bahtatboy May 25th 2010 5:46 pm

Re: Worlds worst chat up lines
 

Originally Posted by Vice Lord (Post 8585707)
How about "you are the most beautiful woman i've ever seen and I want to make love to you right now"

That worked for me at the grocery store once.

You shagged a vegetable?

Bahtatboy May 25th 2010 5:55 pm

Re: Worlds worst chat up lines
 
"Can I buy you breakfast?" has worked from time to time.

Failing that, "500 Dirhams. Let's go now." seems to work OK too.

MacScot May 25th 2010 5:59 pm

Re: Worlds worst chat up lines
 
Did you fart? Cos ya just blew me away.


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