Simao

Maybe you missed the part where I said that the father should be hanged for this... now how is this blaming the daughters more than the father?


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Ok tell me, they had so many miscarriages dead kids and genetically disorder children this should be quite enough for them to realize that they shouldn't take it beacuse the children are suffering this as well and the silence from the daughters for a 27 years is not helping them.

Then why did they act now? Why now? If they tried to escape and failed I'd respect them more and have more sympathy for their case but they didn't. They suffered and their children suffered because of that. Comon you can't tell me that for this entire 27 years they couldnt' just make a 911 call "Oh, Hi, well my dad is beating us and he's burning us and oh he banging my sister as we speak".
You'll keep saying that there is more to it in this case and you're right there might be. They might got attached (against their own good) to the father. But we don't know that, we know little facts and from that I think I am being correct.

Hello.Kitty

[QUOTE=Simao;7014364]
Ok tell me, they had so many miscarriages dead kids and genetically disorder children this should be quite enough for them to realize that they shouldn't take it beacuse the children are suffering this as well and the silence from the daughters for a 27 years is not helping them.

QUOTE]

I'm assuming you've never had to deal with miscarriage... Given that their "relationship" with their father was all they knew of parenthood and had so many failed pregnancies, they would have been "grateful" for the successful ones. It's twisted, but that's the way of it.

The fear of having these babies taken away (again, in the light of so many failed pregnancies) would have been enough to keep them quiet.

MrsHaps

I have just realised what a waste of time it is talking to you, can i suggest you never ever talk to someone who was abused throughout childhood - you are likely to get linched! someone with experience is trying to explain it is not as easy as picking up the telephone because from a young age these children as they were then were groomed by and adult.... why now? again who knows, maybe he was going to really kill them and they had to do something, maybe someone else reported something that led to the opening up of this all!

Get off your high horse, come back to reality, not everything is black and white. You are making yourself out to look like an arse, who clearly needs to be more worldwise and grow the fck up!

Eva

Nil desperandum.........encore un fois.

Simao, Can I ask you something? Do you have any phobias? Are you irrationally terrified of crows, heights, red hair or pink pyjamas???

I have a phobia about heights;not climbing hills or flying I can do that
but I cannot stand on the ground and look up at the Burj without feeling really sick and breaking out in sweats.I cannot watch that video Shiva?? posted about guys jumping from it. I cannot stand and look up at the Tour Eiffel from the ground w.o. the same effect.
Here's the thing though.....I can get in an elevator and go to the top floor-no worries.Please just don't ask me to stand and look up at em....Now that's weird yeh? but I cannot help it. I try to rationalize it in my head but it genuinely terrifies me and there ain't nothing I can do (**) to change that.

By nature, I am a sceptic and cynical-and if I didn't know otherwise perhaps I would be wondering as you are why these women didn't escape.
I have had first hand disclosure/evidence of many people in similar scenarios who have dismissed my ignorant scepticism about how much they were 'art and part' in the abuse.Believe me, you only have to hear this once or twice to know these fears are real and debilitating on all levels-physically, emotionally and practically. If you wish, pm me and I will give you some Case references.Now, the points you raise....

QUOTE=Simao;7014364]Maybe you missed the part where I said that the father should be hanged for this... now how is this blaming the daughters more than the father?
I used the word 'angst' deliberately avoiding suggestions of blame.


Ok tell me, they had so many miscarriages dead kids and genetically disorder children this should be quite enough for them to realize that they shouldn't take it beacuse the children are suffering this as well and the silence from the daughters for a 27 years is not helping them.

You are applying your ordered logic to something.These women were completely undermined, controlled and emotionally damaged-they probably will never get over it even long after their abuser is freed
Then why did they act now? Why now? If they tried to escape and failed I'd respect them more and have more sympathy for their case but they didn't. They suffered and their children suffered because of that. Comon you can't tell me that for this entire 27 years they couldnt' just make a 911 call "Oh, Hi, well my dad is beating us and he's burning us and oh he banging my sister as we speak".
You'll keep saying that there is more to it in this case and you're right there might be. They might got attached (against their own good) to the father. But we don't know that, we know little facts and from that I think I am being correct.[/QUOTE]


I do not know the catylyst which made them approach the police when they did- but they did.They sought help. Who are we to judge their timeline was excessive? .
I am sure Simao, they do not care for your respect ,or mine's or anyone's for that matter.They are probably hopelessly trying to garner some self respect-enought to make them feel they are entitled to a life w.o. abuse.

Very briefly,a number of years ago in UK, a woman walked into my Office.She had come straight from her mother's funeral. Over the next four or so hours she told me about over 2 decades of sexual abuse her father had subjected her and her sisters to.He 'invited' each girl to submit to his abuse-if they resisted he would physically beat their mother in front of them.She was an invalid alcoholic...This started when his daughters 7, 8 and 11.He had two sons too.They did not escape his attention.The brothers then turned their learned behaviour on their sisters. All five kids in that family were raped and repeatedly abused by the father for years.Not one of the kids could ask for help....they loved their mother,they knew their father would kill her.Going to the authorities would get their brothers into trouble for raping their sisters and, as it happened each other. Their brothers were effectively sex offenders and at the end of criminal proceedings the brothers(men by then)
had their kids removed into care.....because of what they had done to each other and their sisters....

See how pernicious and evil it is yet??? And how its not so simple to call the Social Work or police.This family were known to social services, educational services and local police - plenty of opportunity you would think to disclose
but didn't happen.
As soon as her mother was in the ground, the girl sought help. She said that the fear of her father and the guilt factor shifted upon her in terms of his violence -together with the fact that their mother in her drunken addled mind 'loved her husband' despite the beatings and would in all probability not believe the kids over him......

Enough.

Bambi in Abu Dhabi

Having been obliquely involved in some child protection litigation myself, I believe that logic seldom plays a part: not in the minds of the victims/perpetrators, nor in the minds of the authorities.