Integrate ? No Thanks

Old Mar 29th 2016, 5:27 am
  #16  
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Default Re: Integrate ? No Thanks

We have Local friends, mostly through my husband who has been here for a long time and they are his old neighbours etc. We see them a few times year and are always invited for iftar etc.

I make a huge effort to integrate and find that just being the first to start up a normal conversation really makes a difference. I just talk about things like how Summer is coming/Winter is here - just things to get the conversation going. Emirati people are really lovely.

Also if any of you haven't done the Cultural breakfast/lunch yet at SMCCU|Sheikh Mohammed Centre for Cultural Understanding, it's brilliant and your visitors would also love it. The UAE in general makes a huge effort to open its doors to us in terms of explaining their culture and accommodating ours with churches and festivals etc - it's nice to go along and listen to their people talk about things we sometimes don't understand.

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Old Mar 29th 2016, 7:09 am
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Default Re: Integrate ? No Thanks

Originally Posted by Ditzy

Also if any of you haven't done the Cultural breakfast/lunch yet at SMCCU|Sheikh Mohammed Centre for Cultural Understanding, it's brilliant and your visitors would also love it.

I like the idea, however, is this anywhere near realistic in terms of how locals are or is it just an act for the tourists?

Again, for me I have no problem whatsoever talking to locals if they engage or are in vicinity, however, I'm not going to go out looking to meet them and secondly I am more than a bit hesitant over the power that they have. We've all been here long enough to know that it doesn't take too much to end up in a miss understanding over here and locals aren't exactly famed for not running straight to the Police and claiming X, Y, Z even if it skirts around the limits of truth.
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Old Mar 29th 2016, 1:16 pm
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Default Re: Integrate ? No Thanks

Anyone else not that bothered?

I know one quite well and he (and his British wife) are quality. Really nice and friendly and both like a beer. Result.

Otherwise it breaks down for me;

1. I don't really mind where people are from, whether local or Brits or Aussies or whatever. I do appreciate this wasn't really an option in the discussion though.
2. Is there much point in investing time and effort in friendships with people here from other corners or parts of the globe? I don't make much effort with people I know I won't see once I leave here...but few friends here local to where I am back home - I certainly make the effort for them (I also like them more than perhaps some of the people from London or Manchester etc).

Fundamentally, we (the mrs and I) don't get that many opportunities to integrate or spend time with (socially) locals or GCC Arabs in general. I'm sure the one we know well is a decent benchmark, I'm sure there are some legends and some less wonderful. But at the end of the day, they're just folk too and probably don't give much of a hoot about us either....unless they have to (work etc).
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Old Mar 29th 2016, 1:29 pm
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Default Re: Integrate ? No Thanks

As far as Dubai is concerned, not the rest of the UAE, Emiratis only make up something like 12% of the population. Do these relatively small number of people all suddenly want a load of new expat friends?

Scamp refers to not making an effort with those he is unlikely to see in the future. Why wouldn't many Emiratis feel the same about expats who by definition have to leave one day?
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Old Mar 30th 2016, 4:23 am
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Default Re: Integrate ? No Thanks

Originally Posted by Meow
As far as Dubai is concerned, not the rest of the UAE, Emiratis only make up something like 12% of the population. Do these relatively small number of people all suddenly want a load of new expat friends?

Scamp refers to not making an effort with those he is unlikely to see in the future. Why wouldn't many Emiratis feel the same about expats who by definition have to leave one day?
Thanks. Forgot to say it's reciprocal.
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Old Mar 30th 2016, 6:38 am
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Default Re: Integrate ? No Thanks

Originally Posted by Meow

Scamp refers to not making an effort with those he is unlikely to see in the future. Why wouldn't many Emiratis feel the same about expats who by definition have to leave one day?


Live for today. Course you make effort with those you are unlikely to see in the future. Especially so in expat-land. That's the kind of attitude one would expect from a stay at home Brit who holidays in the same place (caravan park in Rhyl) each year as he's on first name terms with the bingo caller...two fat ladies
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Old Mar 30th 2016, 7:29 am
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Default Re: Integrate ? No Thanks

When I came to Dubai for my first stint here it was early 2008 and the housing market was insane. I was desperate to find a flat/villa share. Every place listed on Dubizzle was getting inquiries from dozens, in some cases, over a hundred desperate expats looking for a place to live. I finally found a place, a room in a Springs villa owned by a local and his "European" wife. Chap was friendly enough. He mentioned a dozen people were already interested in the room but he would offer it to me if I wanted it. I forked over 5K for the first month's rent.

All of six hours later I got an offer of a room in a villa share in Jumeira where one of my coworkers lived. Proper villa set up with young expats. It was exactly what I was looking for. Rang up the Emirati and said I wasn't interested in the room any more. Asked for the payment back. Mind you, this was during when every room listed on Dubizzle was being chased by dozens and dozens of people. No one was having problems finding a new tenant.

The local blew me off. Avoided all calls. I didn't have a leg to stand on, of course, as there was no receipt, no contract, nothing, so I had to let it go although I had fantasies of hiring a few Russians in a dank bar in Deira to do something to his tyres. It was still worth it as the villa share turned out to be a fantastic experience.

But since then I've had nothing to do with locals. Shrugs. One bad apple doesn't mean much but it's not worth the effort, especially if you don't seem to have much in common (not interested in supercars, not interested in quaffing too much sugary drinks and cakes in the middle of the day).

Originally Posted by flares
Live for today. Course you make effort with those you are unlikely to see in the future. Especially so in expat-land. That's the kind of attitude one would expect from a stay at home Brit who holidays in the same place (caravan park in Rhyl) each year as he's on first name terms with the bingo caller...two fat ladies
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Old Mar 31st 2016, 12:42 am
  #23  
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Default Re: Integrate ? No Thanks

Originally Posted by iggle
to be fair, they (as in the UAE) makes a massive effort when it comes to Christian festivals such as Easter/Christmas. I think they need to be applauded more for this.

Anyway, the same back in UK. With large Asian communities all in one area. You stick with your own, its the same as when an British moves aboard - you stick with your own.
The Emirati attitude towards Christian festivals is just good PR for commerical gain AND because they know the Christian population are not citizens so playing a little nice is not a concern for them. If Christians were citizens, Emiratis would take a vastly different tone towards Chrisitan festivals.

Emirates do not allow churches with steeples, atleast that was the case when I was there in the 80s and 90s. They also destroyed the original St Jospeh Catholic church that was in the corniche , because it was too valuable and prominent a spot for a church. The church/school was forced to move .

Expats are kept at a distance by Emiratis and not allowed to become citizens so hardly surprising they don't integrate. How can you integrate when you know you will have to leave in the near future.

Last edited by Boomhauer; Mar 31st 2016 at 12:45 am.
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Old Mar 31st 2016, 6:16 am
  #24  
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Default Re: Integrate ? No Thanks

Originally Posted by Boomhauer
The Emirati attitude towards Christian festivals is just good PR for commerical gain AND because they know the Christian population are not citizens so playing a little nice is not a concern for them. If Christians were citizens, Emiratis would take a vastly different tone towards Chrisitan festivals.

Emirates do not allow churches with steeples, atleast that was the case when I was there in the 80s and 90s. They also destroyed the original St Jospeh Catholic church that was in the corniche , because it was too valuable and prominent a spot for a church. The church/school was forced to move .

Expats are kept at a distance by Emiratis and not allowed to become citizens so hardly surprising they don't integrate. How can you integrate when you know you will have to leave in the near future.
Why do you still post in a ME forum when you left as a child over 20 years ago? It's always puzzled me.
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Old Mar 31st 2016, 1:48 pm
  #25  
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Default Re: Integrate ? No Thanks

Originally Posted by Norm_uk
Are they living separate lives, only marrying their own and calling for their own legal system to be introduced?

Do they want to punish people who insult the Queen or say bad things about the Anglicans?

Serious question. How separate are these English folk in an Anglosphere country really? And how many generations do they carry on like that for?

N.
Spot on post. Ethnic identity is retained to an extent - e.g. half of Western Sydney identifies as Aussie-Greek/Aussie-Lebanese etc - but there's wholesale integration. You will find divisions at the cricket when The Ashes is on, but give it a single generation and even the kids' cricket loyalties will have wavered. (Speaking as a dual Aussie-Pom national.) Conversely, the only time I would go to Karama would be to go to Kafe Betawi.

I've spent years living in South America as an expat. Yes you gravitate towards other Anglophones to an extent, but even there you completely integrate with the locals as you pick the language up. Maybe it being a largely Christian society helps. The Middle East by comparison I find compartmented and alien, particularly once you scratch off the surface veneer.
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Old Mar 31st 2016, 1:59 pm
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Default Re: Integrate ? No Thanks

Originally Posted by Millhouse
Why do you still post in a ME forum when you left as a child over 20 years ago? It's always puzzled me.
Left as a teen. As for posting: it's like posting on any other board that is casual chit-chat in nature.
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