Originally Posted by NightCrawler

Spugs....I know right know your probably feeling like this is a colossal life failure, but it's not. It's just a monumental failure and the cause is never just a few unfortunate instances like trashing a police van or constant womanizing. Women will put up with a lot of things, believe me, I know, but some things are just not acceptable and one of them is boredom.

I've been married to a beautiful woman for 30+ years, and in that time I've seen numerous friends divorce and they all had one thing in common. They didn't take care of their wives, they didn't give them enough attention, they didn't take them out enough, they didn't stand up when their wives approached the table and they didn't open doors for her. They didn't listen when she talked and they didn't make her #1 on their speed dial.

A divorce is always the mans fault, always. If you meet 4 out of 5, or even 3 out of 5 of a womans basic needs, she won't want to ever leave you.

Next time do it right, and don't marry someone you don't adore

Originally Posted by Brains1983

only thing that makes sense to me is "Just Fucking Do It"

Originally Posted by Conrad Dobbler

.....I can't explain my feelings for Mata Hari...But If a man ever loved a woman, I love Mata Hari and I don't care how crazy it sounds. Its sounds crazy to me as well and i've been wrestlin with it in my mind for 5 years now. I'd climb the highest mountain and swim across the deepest ocean for her and I think she's the greatest thing mother nature ever created. I don't know if i'm her match, but she's most certainly mine...KLM is the Royal Dutch Airline but she's the Koninklijke Nederlands vrouw.

But- I've been married to a woman for 30 years, with a 33 year old daughter together and weve had 4 more kids after that. This woman put up with me when no other woman would have. She put up with another kid with another woman, she put up with an absentee father, she put up and a man living on the fringe of normal society. I led a dangerious and wreckless life and somehow we survived it together- I should have died 5 times over, but now she's dying. She has lupus and her body has turned on itself. Her body is fighting her internal organs and she spends most days in bed in constant pain.. As much as I'd like to, I can't leave her now to go chase some woman on the other side of the planet. My kids would hate me and I'd probably hate myself.

I'm gonna try to make her mine one day, but....Not yet

Originally Posted by Conrad Dobbler

So I apologize to the mods and everyone else i've bothered here in my attempts to make contact MH

I'm sorry-

Originally Posted by MataHari

I am impressed with his persistance though, it's unrivalled

Originally Posted by the_red_sheep

If I can drag this back on topic for a second, I’m going through something similar at the moment (although was never actually married, which seems to just make things more complicated!) and have had to use a UK based solicitor. If they invoice me to my address here, that would avoid paying VAT on their fees right…?

Originally Posted by Spugsy

As well as this we are sorting the flat out, it's in our names and she's going to sign it over to me, no cash, no nothing.

Now I got in touch with the bank and told them it has been rented out for 5 years and I want it in my name, and it seems I don't have a buy to let mortgage so can't legally rent it out....so been waiting 2 weeks to hear what I'll have to do. They said I can switch it to buy to let for a higher rate but need to pay about £32k off as they don't do 100% mortgages which is what we had.

I could well be in the shit here.

Originally Posted by the_red_sheep

Do you need a 100% mortgage know though? Isn’t there equity in the property built up over the 5 years it’s been rented out, plus any appreciation in the value in that time which’d mean the outstanding mortgage amount is less than 100% of the property value.

Buy-to-let interest rates are always higher than regularly mortgages and usually require a 20-30% deposit. Might be worth having a look about for alternative banks who offer more favourable terms and switching the mortgage to them.

Anyway, the whole process no matter how amicable you try and make it is a massive pain in the nuts, and ultimately going to cause some friction and someone to be out of pocket (in my case that is definitely me).

Originally Posted by the_red_sheep

If I can drag this back on topic for a second, I’m going through something similar at the moment (although was never actually married, which seems to just make things more complicated!) and have had to use a UK based solicitor. If they invoice me to my address here, that would avoid paying VAT on their fees right…?

Originally Posted by Spugsy

We haven't had it that long and took the 100% mortgage and were paying interest only until not that long ago so haven't paid much off at all. I can;'t get my hands on 25% of the equity and it's in negative equity right now.

Waiting to hear back from them but they did allow us to rent it out when we left but that was short termish I believe.

I told them I'd be back in a few years (a lie) hoping I can rent it out for a few years more until I can get my hands on the cash then get a buy to let mortgage but we shall see.

Originally Posted by Meow

Correct