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-   -   the genie (https://britishexpats.com/forum/sand-pit-116/genie-485871/)

mythic Oct 7th 2007 7:47 pm

the genie
 
A husband takes his wife to play her first game of golf.....Of course, the

wife promptly whacked her first shot right through the window of the

biggest house adjacent to the course.



The husband cringed, 'I warned you to be careful! Now we'll have to go up

there, find the owner, apologize and see how much your lousy drive is going

to cost us.'



So the couple walked up to the house and knocked on the door. A warm voice

said, 'Come on in.'



When they opened the door they saw the damage that was done: glass was all

over the place, and a broken antique bottle was lying on its side near the

broken window.



A man reclining on the couch asked, 'Are you the people that broke my

window?'



'Uh...yeah, sir. We're sure sorry about that,' the husband replied.



'Oh, no apology is necessary. Actually I want to thank you... You see, I'm

a genie , and I've been trapped in that bottle for a thousand years. Now

that you've released me, I'm allowed to grant three wishes. I'll give you

each one wish, but if you don't mind, I'll keep the last one for myself.'



'Wow, that's great!' the husband said. He pondered a moment and blurted

out, 'I'd like a million dollars a year for the rest of my life.'



'No problem,' said the genie. 'You've got it, it's the least I can do. And

I'll guarantee you a long, healthy life!' 'And now you, young lady, what do

you want?' the genie asked.



'I'd like to own a gorgeous home complete with servants in every country in

the world,' she said.



'Consider it done,' the genie said. 'And your homes will always be safe

from fire, burglary and natural disasters!'



'And now,' the couple asked in unison, what's your wish, genie?'



'Well, since I've been trapped in that bottle and haven't been with a woman

in more than a thousand years, my wish is to have sex with your wife.'



The husband looked at his wife and said, 'Gee, honey, you know we both now

have a fortune, and all those houses. What do you think?' She mulled it

over for a few moments and said, 'You know, you're right. Considering our

good fortune, I guess I wouldn't mind, but what about you, honey?'



'You know I love you sweetheart,' said the husband. I'd do the same for

you!'



So the genie and the woman went upstairs where they spent the rest of the

afternoon enjoying each other in every way. After about three hours of

non-stop sex, the genie rolled over and looked directly into her eyes and

asked. How old are you and your husband?'



'Why, we're both 35,' she responded breathlessly.

'NO Kidding.' He said, 'Thirty-five years old and both of you still believe

in genies?'

Crash Oct 8th 2007 1:10 am

Re: the genie
 
I still believe in Santa Clause! Can we have the following happen:

There was an American an Englishman and Bin Ladin standing on top of Empire State building.The American says to Bin Ladin "This building is made suicide proof, if you jump off it, the contours of the building will force winds up that push you back on top."Bin Ladin replies"You silly little American Bin Ladin wants proof show me this is true". The American hesitates then jumps over the side. Bin Laden shakes his head and laughs when suddenly WHOOOOOSH, The American is blown back on the roof.Bin Ladin says"This pleases me,I will try". He goes to the edge and jumps over the side.AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH SMACK!!!! He hits the sidewalk DEAD.Back on top the Englisman says to the American"You know when you usually do that trick I get mad but this time it was quite funny... SUPERMAN".


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