CV Classics
#1
Account Closed
Thread Starter
Joined: Feb 2011
Posts: 0
CV Classics
You all know what I do. No point repeating, most of you think what I do is a scummy, a bit bottom of the barrel and most of you have had a bad experience with a shit recruiter before (of which there are millions).
However, on a daily basis I get some blinding quotes. Enough to fill a book, and I'm going to post some of these for your / my amusement.
Starting with a classic covering letter;
"I’ve been working for Toyota/Lexus Saudi for ten years in different fields (Customer Service, Operations Management, and Development and Training Dept),
I writing to you and attached my CV referring to the job vacancy of MEP Project Director"
However, on a daily basis I get some blinding quotes. Enough to fill a book, and I'm going to post some of these for your / my amusement.
Starting with a classic covering letter;
"I’ve been working for Toyota/Lexus Saudi for ten years in different fields (Customer Service, Operations Management, and Development and Training Dept),
I writing to you and attached my CV referring to the job vacancy of MEP Project Director"
#2
Re: CV Classics
You all know what I do. No point repeating, most of you think what I do is a scummy, a bit bottom of the barrel and most of you have had a bad experience with a shit recruiter before (of which there are millions).
However, on a daily basis I get some blinding quotes. Enough to fill a book, and I'm going to post some of these for your / my amusement.
Starting with a classic covering letter;
"I’ve been working for Toyota/Lexus Saudi for ten years in different fields (Customer Service, Operations Management, and Development and Training Dept),
I writing to you and attached my CV referring to the job vacancy of MEP Project Director"
However, on a daily basis I get some blinding quotes. Enough to fill a book, and I'm going to post some of these for your / my amusement.
Starting with a classic covering letter;
"I’ve been working for Toyota/Lexus Saudi for ten years in different fields (Customer Service, Operations Management, and Development and Training Dept),
I writing to you and attached my CV referring to the job vacancy of MEP Project Director"
#3
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Mar 2011
Posts: 1,132
Re: CV Classics
Best I had, was a chap who said in the Hobbies and Interests Section . . . "I enjoy reading, writing, swimming and pornography"
Well at least he was honest! - But unfortunately, I did not have access to a 'Pornograph' to view his hobbies!
Well at least he was honest! - But unfortunately, I did not have access to a 'Pornograph' to view his hobbies!
#4
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 13,553
Re: CV Classics
What would you think of a young female candidate who included "Watching Horror Movies" among her interests?
#7
Account Closed
Thread Starter
Joined: Feb 2011
Posts: 0
Re: CV Classics
First email opened today and I find this;
"Trainings;
Leadership Skills
Public Speaking Skills
Reliability"
I'd love to be trained in reliability. I'm probably at a 7 or 8 at the moment, if I can find the course to make me 10/10 reliable it'd be amazing.
"Trainings;
Leadership Skills
Public Speaking Skills
Reliability"
I'd love to be trained in reliability. I'm probably at a 7 or 8 at the moment, if I can find the course to make me 10/10 reliable it'd be amazing.
#8
Account Closed
Thread Starter
Joined: Feb 2011
Posts: 0
Re: CV Classics
Most of you must be able to skim down a CV in 3-4 seconds and say yes - read more or no, delete.
#9
Re: CV Classics
Whats with the sending of pictures with CVs? Never seen this in the Uk but here every CV I get has a little picture attached- why?
#10
Account Closed
Thread Starter
Joined: Feb 2011
Posts: 0
Re: CV Classics
Good for a laugh though.
#11
Re: CV Classics
CVs written in the third person were always good for a momentary laugh.
Before being immediately discarded.
Before being immediately discarded.
#12
Re: CV Classics
Because Arabs want a pretty face especially with women and sometimes even men , it's quite common to see an advert for ' Good looking Receptionist required nice arse a must '....
#13
Hit 16's
Joined: Mar 2010
Location: Of all the gin joints, in all the towns, in all the world, she walks into mine
Posts: 13,112