Grace O Malley

I think all children of divorced parents are affected in some way or other.

some of the affects can show up later in life IE in their 30's and 40's

Blue Cat

I agree with this 100%

Meow

I agree with this. There is not an automatic biological imperative to be maternal, but to declare otherwise, even these days, means that women are assumed to be hard or uncaring.

Double standards certainly apply. If a father works long hours and rarely sees his children then he is just a good breadwinner, but if the mother does likewise, then she is considered negligent or unloving, even with a stay at home father. Certainly these are broad statements, but I find it fascinating that these stereotypes are still largely accepted.

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Blue Cat

course it did! I think divorce affects all kids

Blue Cat

MH once said a couple of years back when someone questioned her on her high post count that she spent time on here as the posters on here were a bit like her colleagues, I agreed with her at the time and I still do. Sometimes the only adult conversation I get during the day is on here. Four year olds really don't do much for me to be honest with you.

Meow

Sure, but to varying degrees. I know many that are just fine with it. Depends on ages, personality of the child and most important how the parents handle everything. Divorce is never ideal, but neither is living wth parents who fight all the time.

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Meow

But you are more honest that most.

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MataHari

I agree, but still it must be the hardest thing in the world...to have that 'mummy and daddy don't love each other anymore' talk...

Grace O Malley

Oh God its awful, really painful for you and the child, but you know kids are pretty resilient and they accept it.

vauxhallmonterey

So why did she have the kid/s in the first place? Even pets are for keeps, not just for christmas!

Meow

I doubt she was planning this when she conceived

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Blue Cat

people often won't admit how their parents divorce has affected them, it is easier for them to say yeah it were fine, no bother. I am yet to meet someone who hasn't when pushed admitted that their parents split affected them one way or another.

Blue Cat

I didn't even get that, he left and that was that, next time I saw him he had his girlfriend with him. I remember it to this day and it was 35 years ago.

MataHari

doesn't this go for the fathers as well, or are they somehow excused from that lifetime commitment...

Grace O Malley

You are prob right BC, I i have asked my lad a couple of times and he always says yeah, fine, no probs, but I am not sure if he just doesn't want the conversation.