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-   -   We have the same old question - Should we return to Scotland (https://britishexpats.com/forum/rovers-return-111/we-have-same-old-question-should-we-return-scotland-947474/)

janetnicol2 Mar 19th 2023 7:21 am

We have the same old question - Should we return to Scotland
 
I have read this forum on and off for many years but have never posted a new thread or a reply to a posting. However, the time seems right to jump in. My husband and I moved from Scotland to the US in 1986 for a couple of years to work and are still here 38 years on. It has been a good life and we have lived and worked in New Jersey, North Carolina and Southern California but we are both now retired. We have no children so all our families are in Scotland. Sadly, my mum died this christmas at the age of 91. We have been lucky and returned to the UK almost every year to visit family and friends and have had family visit us regularly here. My mum would come to San Diego for 3 months in the winter to get out of the miserable weather and once travel opened again we were able to go and be with her for 3 to 4 months. My husband and I like to be active and while in Scotland joined a local hiking group, tennis club and golf club ( these activities were still going on during Covid) and met lots of new friends. I bought a wee car several years ago as it was much cheaper than renting for several months and I kept it at my mother's house so we were able to get out and about. We are actually returning to Scotland in a few weeks for 3 months and are thinking we might want to move back and retire there. While we are back we will be meeting with a tax professional so we can get many of our questions answered about how the move would affect us financially.

Also, my husband has recently been diagnosed with an autoimmune disease that can be managed fairly easily but does required routine monitoring. Although my mother received excellent care from all the NHS staff, many posting on this forum have not. That is a concern.
I do not yet qualify for Medicare in the US and will need to buy insurance for the next 3 years if we remain here. It will be expensive but unthinkable to go without. I am a nurse and know the cost of even just the most minor doctor visit.
Living in San Diego we have really nice weather almost all year. We love being outdoors and being active. We tell ourselves we would continue this in Scotland but aren't sure we are kidding ourselves. When we were home last christmas it rained for the entire 5 weeks!!! It was hard to get motivated to go out even for a walk most days.
Also we do not have any children and our impression of many of the people we met is that a great deal of their time is spent with grandchildren and other family. My sisters do alot of childcare for their families. We are perhaps overestimating the time we might spend with them if we moved back.

Like many other people on the forum, it appears once you move to another country neither place really feels like 'home'. Whatever, decision we make, it will be alright and if it doesn't work out then we can always make another decision! Thanks for letting me put my thoughts down on paper.

Helen1964 Mar 19th 2023 6:52 pm

Re: We have the same old question - Should we return to Scotland
 
I know San Diego and Scotland and if you’re happy-ish in the former, I would stay there.
You’ll have fewer aches and pains and will spend a lot more time out of doors than if you’re in Scotland, peering out the window at the rain and deciding nah, let’s have another cup of tea and a biscuit.
My husband is convinced this is what’ll happen to us if we move to Ireland and he’s probably not wrong.
Norfolk, maybe?

Pongo Mar 19th 2023 10:46 pm

Re: We have the same old question - Should we return to Scotland
 

Originally Posted by Helen1964 (Post 13180770)
I know San Diego and Scotland and if you’re happy-ish in the former, I would stay there.
You’ll have fewer aches and pains and will spend a lot more time out of doors than if you’re in Scotland, peering out the window at the rain and deciding nah, let’s have another cup of tea and a biscuit.
My husband is convinced this is what’ll happen to us if we move to Ireland and he’s probably not wrong.
Norfolk, maybe?

Norfolk has 121 rain days per annum, Edinburgh has 124…not a huge difference.

Helen1964 Mar 19th 2023 11:45 pm

Re: We have the same old question - Should we return to Scotland
 
B*gger.
Much warmer summers, though.

scrubbedexpat142 Mar 19th 2023 11:51 pm

Re: We have the same old question - Should we return to Scotland
 
Someone (born & bred in Norfolk) once said to me that "Norfolk is so flat we get a nose bleed driving up the multi storey car park"!

Helen1964 Mar 20th 2023 1:31 am

Re: We have the same old question - Should we return to Scotland
 
I’m curious to know if the OP has found it easier to make friends in Scotland. When we first started going to San Diego it was the sort of place you could fall into conversation with people very easily. But in the space of a few years that changed. By the time of our last visit the neighbourhoods we used to stay in - Hillcrest and Ocean Beach - had been taken over by standoffish 30-somethings sporting earbuds. They didn’t seem to speak to each other let alone us. One wonders how they ever get together to breed.


Moses2013 Mar 20th 2023 3:15 am

Re: We have the same old question - Should we return to Scotland
 

Originally Posted by Helen1964 (Post 13180770)
I know San Diego and Scotland and if you’re happy-ish in the former, I would stay there.
You’ll have fewer aches and pains and will spend a lot more time out of doors than if you’re in Scotland, peering out the window at the rain and deciding nah, let’s have another cup of tea and a biscuit.
My husband is convinced this is what’ll happen to us if we move to Ireland and he’s probably not wrong.
Norfolk, maybe?

Better to have another tea and biscuit than drink beer all day. Just back from Catalonia and had a great time, not really any different though. People stare at the sun sitting under a canopy wondering if they should have another beer, coffee or plate of crisps;). For us it was great now and like a summer here, but come high season a different story. Driving back through France it pissed down all the way which made returning a bit easier. In 2 months we'll be complaining it's too dry in Ireland, you can't win really.

Pulaski Mar 20th 2023 4:19 am

Re: We have the same old question - Should we return to Scotland
 

Originally Posted by Helen1964 (Post 13180843)
.... had been taken over by standoffish 30-somethings sporting earbuds. They didn’t seem to speak to each other let alone us. One wonders how they ever get together to breed.

Everything is online these days. :nod:

​​Full disclosure, I met Mrs P online, back in 1998. :D

scrubbedexpat142 Mar 20th 2023 4:25 am

Re: We have the same old question - Should we return to Scotland
 

Originally Posted by Helen1964 (Post 13180843)
One wonders how they ever get together to breed.

I expect they have an "app" for that!

Pulaski Mar 20th 2023 4:27 am

Re: We have the same old question - Should we return to Scotland
 

Originally Posted by janetnicol2 (Post 13180735)
.... Like many other people on the forum, it appears once you move to another country neither place really feels like 'home'. Whatever, decision we make, it will be alright and if it doesn't work out then we can always make another decision! Thanks for letting me put my thoughts down on paper.

If you've got the money to do it, or at least access to somewhere to live in Scotland (inherited property?) you could try splitting your time for a few years, so upto 5½ months in Scotland (Scotland in the summer, winter in San Diego) to remain tax resident in the US. If after 3-4 years you're thinking you prefer Scotland, switch things up, spending winter in Scotland. If you still prefer Scotland, then it's time to make that move permanent.

Helen1964 Mar 20th 2023 5:52 am

Re: We have the same old question - Should we return to Scotland
 

Originally Posted by Pulaski (Post 13180880)
Everything is online these days. :nod:

​​Full disclosure, I met Mrs P online, back in 1998. :D

Good grief. You were seriously ahead of your time.

Pulaski Mar 20th 2023 6:16 am

Re: We have the same old question - Should we return to Scotland
 

Originally Posted by Helen1964 (Post 13180921)
Good grief. You were seriously ahead of your time.

Ahead of the herd, yes, but there were/are three (two still are) active members of BE (that I know of) that met their spouse on line before Mrs P and I met.


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