OVER 50's+ MOVING BACK TO THE UK - Part II
Feb 2nd 2011, 9:20 pm
#2671
Ping-ponger
Joined: Jul 2002
Location: Dreich Alba
Posts: 12,006
Re: OVER 50's & 60's MOVING BACK TO THE UK - Part II
I hope Rosie doesn't leave either.
Feb 2nd 2011, 9:26 pm
#2672
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 1,610
Re: OVER 50's & 60's MOVING BACK TO THE UK - Part II
DDL....Would love to hear some udates from you. I know you have a new job but please pop in and update us. You have a lot to contribute to this thread being an American you can give us the view from your point and your OH.
Islandwomen120...How about an update from Frome and what you are doing.
Whats the weather like. Must be warmer than here. 
Islandwomen120...How about an update from Frome and what you are doing.
Whats the weather like. Must be warmer than here.
Feb 2nd 2011, 9:41 pm
#2673
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 2,606
Re: OVER 50's & 60's MOVING BACK TO THE UK - Part II
With due respect to Everyone, it appeared to me after the healthcare split that someone should set up a Returning to UK with Pets thread as some are passionate about the subject and it does seem to take up a lot of valuable space on this thread, I hated to suggest it as someone may have thought I was being mean or sarcastic.
But then I see you are fighting amongst yourselves and realize it might not work anyway.
To be honest these arguments seem so much worse then any I saw on the Healthcare subject.
Just my two cents.
But then I see you are fighting amongst yourselves and realize it might not work anyway.
To be honest these arguments seem so much worse then any I saw on the Healthcare subject.
Just my two cents.
Feb 2nd 2011, 9:43 pm
#2674
Ping-ponger
Joined: Jul 2002
Location: Dreich Alba
Posts: 12,006
Re: OVER 50's & 60's MOVING BACK TO THE UK - Part II
Dunroving... There is a chit chat thread over in the "Rovers Return". I think the issue of animals is a big deal with people returning to the UK but each one of us as their own views on it. Its hard for all to agree on that subject You mentioned the fact that you might be coming back to the US could you give us some idea why you are thinking about doing that. You have been in Scotland for quite a while. I think that would be really useful to hear your view on it. Perhaps you could remind people about why you first wanted to go home and how difficult it has been.
You mentioned the fact that you might be coming back to the US could you give us some idea why you are thinking about doing that. You have been in Scotland for quite a while. I think that would be really useful to hear your view on it. Perhaps you could remind people about why you first wanted to go home and how difficult it has been.Yes, I have been Chitting and Chatting on the other side, too. My main concern about this thread is that it seems to have taken a few mean turns lately. But then I have seen a lot worse, I guess.
As my Profile says, I can't really say why I decided to come back, not one single main reason. I don't have kids here, or a large family or circle of friends I left behind and there was not really anything major wrong with my life in the States:
[tried to insert a link to an old news piece I wrote, but looks like it has been removed - I'll try to find and post later]
As others have said many times, no country is better than another, it's all to do with each individual's personal needs and situation. My professional life in particular pales in comparison to what it was in the States, and being in the public sector, things have only been getting worse (colleagues crying in public meetings, veiled threats linking redundancies with any strike action, feeling like I am on a treadmill going at 10 miles an hour, etc.).
I was on the phone to a US colleague earlier and although things are bad there, it's nowhere near as bad as here in my particular line of work.
I could whinge and whine about some of the really bad aspects of working in the UK right now (I think I could handle living here in retirement a lot easier), but one thing living in the States for so long taught me was not to engage in too much complaining (though I seem to have re-learned the habit since I came back). I get into my Grumpy Old Man mode now and then and sound like a Daily Mail reader (don't get me started on shirkers and benefits scroungers, for instance), but what's the point? If you can't change the situation, change the way you respond to it.
I've seen a lot on BE over the years and that includes a lot of people who were so sure in their convictions (to go to Oz, or to return to the UK), and would get very argumentative with anyone who didn't agree with them. 6 months later the same people would be back singing from the other side of the hymn sheet. Despite protestations to the contrary, I think there are some folks on here who are looking at the UK very much through rose-tinted glasses and although some recognise the fact, there will be others who will get a big shock when they return - but who am I to tell them that? They will find out soon enough.
I used to be pretty easy-going and positive in the States, and thinking positively has got me through a difficult 5 years since I got back here, but thinking positively can only do so much.
I wouldn't normally point out these things, but you did ask ....
Feb 2nd 2011, 9:45 pm
#2675
Ping-ponger
Joined: Jul 2002
Location: Dreich Alba
Posts: 12,006
Re: OVER 50's & 60's MOVING BACK TO THE UK - Part II
Just found a copy of that old BE News piece I saved - it actually turned out to be quite prophetic:
It Is Not All Bad
Written by dunroving
Saturday, 24 June 2006
I'm not usually one to "share", but I just came back from walking the dog and thought I'd relate what happened ...
I live in a small neighborhood in the US tucked away across the street from where I work. The university baseball field is just across the street and when there's a game on, you can hear the crowd (and the floodlights light up the tops of the tall trees that are everywhere in my neighborhood, it's a pretty cool sight, especially when the wind is blowing, which is often).
The game must have been exciting because I could hear the crowd were just rocking, (literally). Jimi Hendrix was blasting out into the night and everyone was clapping in time. Every now and then there would be a huge roar because of whatever was going on onfield.
The temperature was about 65 degrees, clear sky, just typical for early spring.
So, what's this got to do with anything? Well, it's just one of several reminders I've had recently, (now I'm getting ready to move back to the UK), of how many cool things there are about living in the US. When I left last time, (1999), I attended a high school softball game on a similar clear, cool spring night out in the middle of rural middle TN and it was like something out of a Hollywood movie.
So often in the forums of this site people get defensive about "their" country, or critical about the country they are leaving and I was just reminded tonight that lots of people go back to the UK not because Oz/US/Middle East or wherever country they live is parochial, unfriendly, materialistic, etc, but just because it's time to go home.
I think I've also got a feel for the "curse of the expats": nowhere is perfect and you can spend half your life reminiscing about what you don't have where you are, that you did have where you were.
I'm hoping I can get my occasional US "fix" by visiting and that I don't torture myself with thoughts of "what did I do?"
Last Updated ( Tuesday, 29 August 2006 )
It Is Not All Bad
Written by dunroving
Saturday, 24 June 2006
I'm not usually one to "share", but I just came back from walking the dog and thought I'd relate what happened ...
I live in a small neighborhood in the US tucked away across the street from where I work. The university baseball field is just across the street and when there's a game on, you can hear the crowd (and the floodlights light up the tops of the tall trees that are everywhere in my neighborhood, it's a pretty cool sight, especially when the wind is blowing, which is often).
The game must have been exciting because I could hear the crowd were just rocking, (literally). Jimi Hendrix was blasting out into the night and everyone was clapping in time. Every now and then there would be a huge roar because of whatever was going on onfield.
The temperature was about 65 degrees, clear sky, just typical for early spring.
So, what's this got to do with anything? Well, it's just one of several reminders I've had recently, (now I'm getting ready to move back to the UK), of how many cool things there are about living in the US. When I left last time, (1999), I attended a high school softball game on a similar clear, cool spring night out in the middle of rural middle TN and it was like something out of a Hollywood movie.
So often in the forums of this site people get defensive about "their" country, or critical about the country they are leaving and I was just reminded tonight that lots of people go back to the UK not because Oz/US/Middle East or wherever country they live is parochial, unfriendly, materialistic, etc, but just because it's time to go home.
I think I've also got a feel for the "curse of the expats": nowhere is perfect and you can spend half your life reminiscing about what you don't have where you are, that you did have where you were.
I'm hoping I can get my occasional US "fix" by visiting and that I don't torture myself with thoughts of "what did I do?"
Last Updated ( Tuesday, 29 August 2006 )
There's disagreement and then there's unnecessarily uncharitable judgement. Not the same at all.
Yes, I have been Chitting and Chatting on the other side, too. My main concern about this thread is that it seems to have taken a few mean turns lately. But then I have seen a lot worse, I guess.
As my Profile says, I can't really say why I decided to come back, not one single main reason. I don't have kids here, or a large family or circle of friends I left behind and there was not really anything major wrong with my life in the States:
[tried to insert a link to an old news piece I wrote, but looks like it has been removed - I'll try to find and post later]
As others have said many times, no country is better than another, it's all to do with each individual's personal needs and situation. My professional life in particular pales in comparison to what it was in the States, and being in the public sector, things have only been getting worse (colleagues crying in public meetings, veiled threats linking redundancies with any strike action, feeling like I am on a treadmill going at 10 miles an hour, etc.).
I was on the phone to a US colleague earlier and although things are bad there, it's nowhere near as bad as here in my particular line of work.
I could whinge and whine about some of the really bad aspects of working in the UK right now (I think I could handle living here in retirement a lot easier), but one thing living in the States for so long taught me was not to engage in too much complaining (though I seem to have re-learned the habit since I came back). I get into my Grumpy Old Man mode now and then and sound like a Daily Mail reader (don't get me started on shirkers and benefits scroungers, for instance), but what's the point? If you can't change the situation, change the way you respond to it.
I've seen a lot on BE over the years and that includes a lot of people who were so sure in their convictions (to go to Oz, or to return to the UK), and would get very argumentative with anyone who didn't agree with them. 6 months later the same people would be back singing from the other side of the hymn sheet. Despite protestations to the contrary, I think there are some folks on here who are looking at the UK very much through rose-tinted glasses and although some recognise the fact, there will be others who will get a big shock when they return - but who am I to tell them that? They will find out soon enough.
I used to be pretty easy-going and positive in the States, and thinking positively has got me through a difficult 5 years since I got back here, but thinking positively can only do so much.
I wouldn't normally point out these things, but you did ask ....
Yes, I have been Chitting and Chatting on the other side, too. My main concern about this thread is that it seems to have taken a few mean turns lately. But then I have seen a lot worse, I guess.
As my Profile says, I can't really say why I decided to come back, not one single main reason. I don't have kids here, or a large family or circle of friends I left behind and there was not really anything major wrong with my life in the States:
[tried to insert a link to an old news piece I wrote, but looks like it has been removed - I'll try to find and post later]
As others have said many times, no country is better than another, it's all to do with each individual's personal needs and situation. My professional life in particular pales in comparison to what it was in the States, and being in the public sector, things have only been getting worse (colleagues crying in public meetings, veiled threats linking redundancies with any strike action, feeling like I am on a treadmill going at 10 miles an hour, etc.).
I was on the phone to a US colleague earlier and although things are bad there, it's nowhere near as bad as here in my particular line of work.
I could whinge and whine about some of the really bad aspects of working in the UK right now (I think I could handle living here in retirement a lot easier), but one thing living in the States for so long taught me was not to engage in too much complaining (though I seem to have re-learned the habit since I came back). I get into my Grumpy Old Man mode now and then and sound like a Daily Mail reader (don't get me started on shirkers and benefits scroungers, for instance), but what's the point? If you can't change the situation, change the way you respond to it.
I've seen a lot on BE over the years and that includes a lot of people who were so sure in their convictions (to go to Oz, or to return to the UK), and would get very argumentative with anyone who didn't agree with them. 6 months later the same people would be back singing from the other side of the hymn sheet. Despite protestations to the contrary, I think there are some folks on here who are looking at the UK very much through rose-tinted glasses and although some recognise the fact, there will be others who will get a big shock when they return - but who am I to tell them that? They will find out soon enough.
I used to be pretty easy-going and positive in the States, and thinking positively has got me through a difficult 5 years since I got back here, but thinking positively can only do so much.
I wouldn't normally point out these things, but you did ask ....
Feb 2nd 2011, 10:25 pm
#2676
Finally Home!
Joined: Mar 2010
Location: Used to be New York, now North Yorkshire
Posts: 3,610
Re: OVER 50's & 60's MOVING BACK TO THE UK - Part II
Despite protestations to the contrary, I think there are some folks on here who are looking at the UK very much through rose-tinted glasses and although some recognise the fact, there will be others who will get a big shock when they return - but who am I to tell them that? They will find out soon enough.
Perhaps we humans have to think of the good things just so we don't freak out and never make the move at all. I know when I first left England for Canada, I was full of naive ideas, and then again when I came here. But in the end, (I think) I'm glad of that naivety because if I had known the truth, I would never have left at all.
(I say 'I think' because maybe I'd have been better off just staying).
I do keep having those moments you described when I think of something wonderful about the US, or when one of my UK friends goes all 'grumpy old man' on me. I start to wonder if going back is the right move. But when I remind myself of my reasons for going back, I know it is.
I do wonder about those going back to no family or friends. I think that must be much, much harder and I have tons of admiration for you and Rosie and ED who have done that so bravely.
Feb 2nd 2011, 11:53 pm
#2677
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 4,100
Re: OVER 50's & 60's MOVING BACK TO THE UK - Part II
With due respect to Everyone, it appeared to me after the healthcare split that someone should set up a Returning to UK with Pets thread as some are passionate about the subject and it does seem to take up a lot of valuable space on this thread, I hated to suggest it as someone may have thought I was being mean or sarcastic.
But then I see you are fighting amongst yourselves and realize it might not work anyway.
To be honest these arguments seem so much worse then any I saw on the Healthcare subject.
Just my two cents.
But then I see you are fighting amongst yourselves and realize it might not work anyway.
To be honest these arguments seem so much worse then any I saw on the Healthcare subject.
Just my two cents.
Feb 3rd 2011, 12:03 am
#2678
Forum Regular
Joined: Nov 2008
Location: Canada
Posts: 202
Re: OVER 50's & 60's MOVING BACK TO THE UK - Part II
Like you windsong I have had cats all my life I was born into a home that had cats. And I love my cats dearly but life doesn't always pan out the way we would like it to, and then you have to make a heartbreaking choice. I would dearly love to take my cats with me but that is not possible for many personal reasons I'm not prepared to go into here. So I am lucky that the person who has bought our home will take Neko also.I have add other people want her too but after talking with them I said no. My neighbour who Neko loves to bits wanted her, unfortunatley his wife as a animal phobia,but he will be coming in everyday for awhile so she will have someone she knows and loves around her.
It tears me a part to hear you saying we shouldn't leave our animals etc.etc.
In a perfect world we wouldn't be parted from them, but it isn't a perfect world and you are a vey lucky person if you are able to take your pets with you some of us are not so lucky for whatever reason.
So please consider other peoples feelings, moving is stressfull enough without being reminded that we are having to leave our ptes behind.
It tears me a part to hear you saying we shouldn't leave our animals etc.etc.
In a perfect world we wouldn't be parted from them, but it isn't a perfect world and you are a vey lucky person if you are able to take your pets with you some of us are not so lucky for whatever reason.
So please consider other peoples feelings, moving is stressfull enough without being reminded that we are having to leave our ptes behind.
Feb 3rd 2011, 12:08 am
#2679
Forum Regular
Joined: Nov 2008
Location: Canada
Posts: 202
Re: OVER 50's & 60's MOVING BACK TO THE UK - Part II
I truly admire everyone who loves their pet enough to find them a good home before leaving. There are plenty of cruel and heartless people who just dump unwanted pets when they become an inconvenience. Each person here has handled this issue with compassion and done the best they can for their pets. As an animal lover, I salute you all!
In other news, I was so excited just now to open Lakelandcam's website and see photos of my beloved Kendal!! Here's the link, but the pictures change each day so it will only be showing Kendal today
http://www.lakelandcam.co.uk/
In other news, I was so excited just now to open Lakelandcam's website and see photos of my beloved Kendal!! Here's the link, but the pictures change each day so it will only be showing Kendal today
http://www.lakelandcam.co.uk/
Feb 3rd 2011, 12:18 am
#2680
Forum Regular
Joined: Nov 2008
Location: Canada
Posts: 202
Re: OVER 50's & 60's MOVING BACK TO THE UK - Part II
,
ED, I was very interested to hear your perspective. I know that I've become very Canadianized over the time we've lived here. This worries me a lot too, but I'm really hoping I'm being realistic about how things will be when I get back. I must say though that I definitely won't be complaining about the weather in England, after the very long winters we've lived with. I may complain about the traffic jams though
If we were both still working, I think it would be much more difficult to make the move, but having the freedom of retirement does give us so many more choices.
I think that is very wise advice, I came here with that type of romantic attitude and for the first few months I was very disalusioned about Scotland and the UK in general. When I finally reconcilled what I was experiencing with what I thought it would or should be like I became more settled and able to move forward. I had done a lot of reading researching so thought I was well prepared but I was not. It is my homeland warts and all but I have had to admit that I am more Canadian than I thought and that there is good and bad in both countries.
If we were both still working, I think it would be much more difficult to make the move, but having the freedom of retirement does give us so many more choices.
Feb 3rd 2011, 12:43 am
#2681
Forum Regular
Joined: Nov 2008
Location: Canada
Posts: 202
Re: OVER 50's & 60's MOVING BACK TO THE UK - Part II
I think that's always the hardest thing about any big move. We do tend to see things through rose-tinted specs even though we try not to.
Perhaps we humans have to think of the good things just so we don't freak out and never make the move at all. I know when I first left England for Canada, I was full of naive ideas, and then again when I came here. But in the end, (I think) I'm glad of that naivety because if I had known the truth, I would never have left at all.
(I say 'I think' because maybe I'd have been better off just staying).
I do keep having those moments you described when I think of something wonderful about the US, or when one of my UK friends goes all 'grumpy old man' on me. I start to wonder if going back is the right move. But when I remind myself of my reasons for going back, I know it is.
I do wonder about those going back to no family or friends. I think that must be much, much harder and I have tons of admiration for you and Rosie and ED who have done that so bravely.
Perhaps we humans have to think of the good things just so we don't freak out and never make the move at all. I know when I first left England for Canada, I was full of naive ideas, and then again when I came here. But in the end, (I think) I'm glad of that naivety because if I had known the truth, I would never have left at all.
(I say 'I think' because maybe I'd have been better off just staying).
I do keep having those moments you described when I think of something wonderful about the US, or when one of my UK friends goes all 'grumpy old man' on me. I start to wonder if going back is the right move. But when I remind myself of my reasons for going back, I know it is.
I do wonder about those going back to no family or friends. I think that must be much, much harder and I have tons of admiration for you and Rosie and ED who have done that so bravely.
When we moved to Canada, I didn't make one single list, just did it and left with hardly a backward glance!
Over the years, I often thought about what might have been, if we had stayed in England, but honestly I don't think its that simple. We've just had different experiences that's all and perhaps we're now at a place in our lives where we can see clearly those things which really make us happy.
Does this make any sense to anyone...I think I'm rambling
Feb 3rd 2011, 1:18 am
#2684
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Jun 2009
Location: Phibun Mangsahan Ubon Province Thailand.
Posts: 1,073
Re: OVER 50's & 60's MOVING BACK TO THE UK - Part II
Windsong........Cats are not my favourite but of
Dontheturner.....After clearing the snow off the deck I could do with a massage from Tim. I think every muscle in my body is aching. I dont want to see another snowflake. Your daughter sounds like a gem. Bet you cant wait to see her again.
Dontheturner.....After clearing the snow off the deck I could do with a massage from Tim. I think every muscle in my body is aching. I dont want to see another snowflake. Your daughter sounds like a gem. Bet you cant wait to see her again.
Yesterday, I emailed her, and said there was something offered on Freecycle, I could do with - she emailed back straight away, and said, how strange - already got that for you! - she is definitely on the same wavelength as I am!
Take care, TT, there will always be a welcome and a cuppa -for you, at our home. Don & Tim
Feb 3rd 2011, 1:21 am
#2685
Forum Regular
Joined: Nov 2008
Location: Canada
Posts: 202
Re: OVER 50's & 60's MOVING BACK TO THE UK - Part II
Hello TT, I used to think, when I left UK, to come here, we seemed ''Far Apart'' but to be honest, I also felt, I had forsaken her, a little, for this love. I emailed, and said lots of things, I should have said before - and also told her of my sadness, about it. I am happy to say, this is the resulting outcome. She is waiting for us! I shall never leave her again.
Yesterday, I emailed her, and said there was something offered on Freecycle, I could do with - she emailed back straight away, and said, how strange - already got that for you! - she is definitely on the same wavelength as I am!
Don & Tim
Yesterday, I emailed her, and said there was something offered on Freecycle, I could do with - she emailed back straight away, and said, how strange - already got that for you! - she is definitely on the same wavelength as I am!
Don & Tim