OVER 50's+ MOVING BACK TO THE UK - Part II
#2551
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Sep 2010
Location: Dorset England.
Posts: 676
Re: OVER 50's & 60's MOVING BACK TO THE UK - Part II
I have noticed since moving back to the UK that when people speak they use negatives. For example: 'You wouldn't happen to have the time, would you?' or 'You wouldn't happen to be taking the bus to town?'
They don't realise that they are speaking in negatives, so when I go into the library, for example, and say "Do you have a copy of ------" as opposed to "You wouldn't happen to have a copy of -------- would you?" it just makes more sense. When I hear the negatives spoken, I want to say "No. I don't" which is not the answer they are looking for. Like saying sorry when you bump into someone and they apologise to you!
It's a cultural thing for sure.
They don't realise that they are speaking in negatives, so when I go into the library, for example, and say "Do you have a copy of ------" as opposed to "You wouldn't happen to have a copy of -------- would you?" it just makes more sense. When I hear the negatives spoken, I want to say "No. I don't" which is not the answer they are looking for. Like saying sorry when you bump into someone and they apologise to you!
It's a cultural thing for sure.
My family do that a lot ,they are not far from you
#2552
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Sep 2009
Posts: 1,197
Re: OVER 50's & 60's MOVING BACK TO THE UK - Part II
I have noticed since moving back to the UK that when people speak they use negatives. For example: 'You wouldn't happen to have the time, would you?' or 'You wouldn't happen to be taking the bus to town?'
They don't realise that they are speaking in negatives, so when I go into the library, for example, and say "Do you have a copy of ------" as opposed to "You wouldn't happen to have a copy of -------- would you?" it just makes more sense. When I hear the negatives spoken, I want to say "No. I don't" which is not the answer they are looking for. Like saying sorry when you bump into someone and they apologise to you!
It's a cultural thing for sure.
They don't realise that they are speaking in negatives, so when I go into the library, for example, and say "Do you have a copy of ------" as opposed to "You wouldn't happen to have a copy of -------- would you?" it just makes more sense. When I hear the negatives spoken, I want to say "No. I don't" which is not the answer they are looking for. Like saying sorry when you bump into someone and they apologise to you!
It's a cultural thing for sure.
LOL! You're so right, it's a cultural thing, and I'm glad it survives. I too love this polite sort of tentativeness, almost as if you feel you're being a nuisance by speaking at all...exactly akin to the saying sorry when someone bumps into you...Anyone who's interested in this sort of thing should read a brilliant book called Watching the English by Kate Fox...she examines all these aspects of Englishness, even doing experiments like trying to bump into people on purpose and NOT say sorry, and jump queues, to see what happens...not very successful experiments as she herself is too English to bring herself to do those things!
Fascinating and funny....
Tina
#2553
Re: OVER 50's & 60's MOVING BACK TO THE UK - Part II
I am just back from the store too...lots of yummy English stuff..cream Donuts..yummy.(need them like a hole in my head)
What I like about England is there are real women here. Not everyone on TV is a size 2....its wonderful. I am having a hard time getting my sleep on track, up all night, and tired all day, but hopefully that will change soon. I hope everyone is well, will be back later.
Jackie..
What I like about England is there are real women here. Not everyone on TV is a size 2....its wonderful. I am having a hard time getting my sleep on track, up all night, and tired all day, but hopefully that will change soon. I hope everyone is well, will be back later.
Jackie..
Oh the yummy food, what you (and I) need to remember is that we are home for good and can have it anytime we like.
I got sooo addicted to chocolate eclairs with fresh cream, you get 2 in a box from Tesco's or wherever, and I could never eat just one could I?
#2555
Re: OVER 50's & 60's MOVING BACK TO THE UK - Part II
Hi again it will be four years since i was back there before that i had been going back every year for6 yrs for at least 6 weeks and one stint of 7 months when me and ex hubby split up......I shall be going back to a small village not far from Lincoln in Lincolnshire and initally staying with my mum and stepdad and then i have offers to stay with all my brothers if i want to have a change and if i decide to stay i know of a cottage coming up to rent.
Im pretty lucky as my brother owns a car sales so he makes sure i have some wheels lol and he said he's waiting for me to arive so he can take me to his boat in the south of france (his treat he said) so im looking forward to that....hey theres a thought maybe i can be his full time boat keeper and live on his boat in France lmao!
Safe travels for you and yes you are right it prob is my first post in the over 50s & 60s.......
Talk soon and good luck for your travels! xxx,
Im pretty lucky as my brother owns a car sales so he makes sure i have some wheels lol and he said he's waiting for me to arive so he can take me to his boat in the south of france (his treat he said) so im looking forward to that....hey theres a thought maybe i can be his full time boat keeper and live on his boat in France lmao!
Safe travels for you and yes you are right it prob is my first post in the over 50s & 60s.......
Talk soon and good luck for your travels! xxx,
Hmmm this brother of yours with a yacht in the South of France, is he single? LOL!!
Hey that sounds like a great job for you!!! The best of both worlds, live in France and a hop and a skip away from England, not like now living on t'other side of the world.
#2556
Forum Regular
Joined: Nov 2007
Location: Toronto, but not for long, Inshallah
Posts: 248
Re: OVER 50's & 60's MOVING BACK TO THE UK - Part II
LOL! You're so right, it's a cultural thing, and I'm glad it survives. I too love this polite sort of tentativeness, almost as if you feel you're being a nuisance by speaking at all...exactly akin to the saying sorry when someone bumps into you...Anyone who's interested in this sort of thing should read a brilliant book called Watching the English by Kate Fox...she examines all these aspects of Englishness, even doing experiments like trying to bump into people on purpose and NOT say sorry, and jump queues, to see what happens...not very successful experiments as she herself is too English to bring herself to do those things!
Fascinating and funny....
Tina
Fascinating and funny....
Tina
#2557
Re: OVER 50's & 60's MOVING BACK TO THE UK - Part II
I will look out for that book too Wawa and Tina, looks interesting.
I still say sorry if I bump into somebody whether it's my fault or not. I like to think I have retained most of my British ways.
I still say sorry if I bump into somebody whether it's my fault or not. I like to think I have retained most of my British ways.
#2558
Forum Regular
Joined: Nov 2008
Location: Canada
Posts: 202
Re: OVER 50's & 60's MOVING BACK TO THE UK - Part II
#2559
Forum Regular
Joined: Nov 2007
Location: Toronto, but not for long, Inshallah
Posts: 248
Re: OVER 50's & 60's MOVING BACK TO THE UK - Part II
I, like Sallysimmons, has to be careful about the move, not to push too hard, highlight the good, play down the bad, oh, and NEVER nag. (Hard to do!)
#2560
Forum Regular
Joined: Nov 2008
Location: Canada
Posts: 202
Re: OVER 50's & 60's MOVING BACK TO THE UK - Part II
Oh, I know exactly what you mean. We have made some friends, but not as many as you would expect in 30 years. Everyone is very friendly on the surface, but it usually doesn't develop into those warm friendships that are so important when you don't have family around you. Luckily, my husband feels the same way (we are both Brits) emigrated together, and for some very strange reason, last year, both started feeling that we wanted to go back.
#2561
Forum Regular
Joined: Nov 2007
Location: Toronto, but not for long, Inshallah
Posts: 248
Re: OVER 50's & 60's MOVING BACK TO THE UK - Part II
Oh, I know exactly what you mean. We have made some friends, but not as many as you would expect in 30 years. Everyone is very friendly on the surface, but it usually doesn't develop into those warm friendships that are so important when you don't have family around you. Luckily, my husband feels the same way (we are both Brits) emigrated together, and for some very strange reason, last year, both started feeling that we wanted to go back.
30 years is a long time! How did you do it? I have been here for 5 and my bags are packed and sitting by the front door. They are invisible, only I can see them. They've been there for a while now You are so lucky that the tug to return home hit you both at the same time. There are more than a few people on these forums that are frustrated by husbands or wives happily plodding along with no real urge to return.
#2562
Re: OVER 50's & 60's MOVING BACK TO THE UK - Part II
Gab, & Rosie, If you bump into me, particularly if I am with Tippawan, I shall apologise to you both, take your arms, and escort you home with me, to recover, and perhaps, get to know you both a little better. love dontheturner xxxx
#2563
Re: OVER 50's & 60's MOVING BACK TO THE UK - Part II
Good to hear from you Jackie. Hope your sleep pattern sorts itself out soon, maybe it's like a form of deep relaxation in your inner being because you are home.
Oh the yummy food, what you (and I) need to remember is that we are home for good and can have it anytime we like.
I got sooo addicted to chocolate eclairs with fresh cream, you get 2 in a box from Tesco's or wherever, and I could never eat just one could I?
Oh the yummy food, what you (and I) need to remember is that we are home for good and can have it anytime we like.
I got sooo addicted to chocolate eclairs with fresh cream, you get 2 in a box from Tesco's or wherever, and I could never eat just one could I?
#2564
Re: OVER 50's & 60's MOVING BACK TO THE UK - Part II
That will be great, Don. Make sure you keep in touch when you get home. Even if you only post now and then. Rosie
#2565
Re: OVER 50's & 60's MOVING BACK TO THE UK - Part II
Rosie - Don't you worry - as soon as I get a PC sorted, I will be in touch. my daughter is being absolutely wonderful to us - says everything we want is in the place! (The house, of course, should be empty, as the tenants have now gone - so she knows my likes, and she is being so good to us). Take Care dontheturner xxx