OVER 50's+ MOVING BACK TO THE UK - Part II
#8056
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Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 1,610
Re: OVER 50's+ MOVING BACK TO THE UK - Part II
To all those who asked me to update the list of those home and those going home. I will do it as soon as my house sells. Just joking will do it next week. Have to clean windows this weekend.
#8057
Joined: Jun 2009
Posts: 112
Re: OVER 50's+ MOVING BACK TO THE UK - Part II
anishq..No didnt mix you up I thought you had a house to sell. Makes it much easier if you dont and how nice that your daughter will be coming with you that should really help but I know what you mean about the ups and downs. I think we all have those. Should we should we not. Like tossing a coin.
The people on here are very nice and always willing to give help and suggestions when needed.
The people on here are very nice and always willing to give help and suggestions when needed.
#8058
Re: OVER 50's+ MOVING BACK TO THE UK - Part II
Welcome Jacqueline!
Yes, you are with others in the very same situation here.
Many of us are torn in this way between children in the adopted country (one of mine lives in Georgia!) and an aging parent or parents at home. We have been called the "sandwich generation," sandwiched between teenagers or young adults who still need us on the one hand, aging parents on the other. For expats with family members in different countries, it's even harder!
But I would think about what it is you miss about your roots.
Is it just your Mum? Important though that bond is--I miss my own very much and am really glad I am nearer her now and can visit more easily--I am not sure it should be the only reason to return.
Jackie's (she's also called ldynlv) story, which she has been brave and generous enough to share, is important here. She really thought she wanted to live back in UK, and has two aging parents there whom she was missing very much. When she got back, it was wonderful to see them, and she liked much about England, but in the end she simply did not feel at home there any more and is going back to the States. (Jackie, if you read this, hope it's a fair summary).
I think, to move back successfully, there must be so much about the UK that one misses. The people AND the place AND the history AND the Englishness or Britishness AND the culture AND the food AND the newspapers.....
etc!
BUT at the same time, if one has been away for many years, it helps to have been back frequently on visits so one knows how it has changed--for better in some ways, for worse in others; it helps as well not to imagine it as perfect-there are plenty of problems there.
Over the years my husband and I would discuss this, and he, worried about the idea of such a move for the family, would marshal arguments against it--logical ones, like higher cost of living, higher taxes, higher rate of burglary, fewer days of sunshine, whatever!!!
And many were undeniably true. But in the end, I said: look, you can bring out every argument in the book. You may be right. It makes no difference whatsoever to me. I am not making out a "pro" and "con" sheet ---(though here I should add this may be a useful strategy for some trying to decide).
I said to him, in the end, it's an emotional need.
It's just about feeling I am where I belong. It may not be the best, sunniest, etc etc place in the world. But when I am there I feel truly at home.
So Jacqueline--these are the kind of things we mull on here, as you have seen--and you are welcome!
Tina
Yes, you are with others in the very same situation here.
Many of us are torn in this way between children in the adopted country (one of mine lives in Georgia!) and an aging parent or parents at home. We have been called the "sandwich generation," sandwiched between teenagers or young adults who still need us on the one hand, aging parents on the other. For expats with family members in different countries, it's even harder!
But I would think about what it is you miss about your roots.
Is it just your Mum? Important though that bond is--I miss my own very much and am really glad I am nearer her now and can visit more easily--I am not sure it should be the only reason to return.
Jackie's (she's also called ldynlv) story, which she has been brave and generous enough to share, is important here. She really thought she wanted to live back in UK, and has two aging parents there whom she was missing very much. When she got back, it was wonderful to see them, and she liked much about England, but in the end she simply did not feel at home there any more and is going back to the States. (Jackie, if you read this, hope it's a fair summary).
I think, to move back successfully, there must be so much about the UK that one misses. The people AND the place AND the history AND the Englishness or Britishness AND the culture AND the food AND the newspapers.....
etc!
BUT at the same time, if one has been away for many years, it helps to have been back frequently on visits so one knows how it has changed--for better in some ways, for worse in others; it helps as well not to imagine it as perfect-there are plenty of problems there.
Over the years my husband and I would discuss this, and he, worried about the idea of such a move for the family, would marshal arguments against it--logical ones, like higher cost of living, higher taxes, higher rate of burglary, fewer days of sunshine, whatever!!!
And many were undeniably true. But in the end, I said: look, you can bring out every argument in the book. You may be right. It makes no difference whatsoever to me. I am not making out a "pro" and "con" sheet ---(though here I should add this may be a useful strategy for some trying to decide).
I said to him, in the end, it's an emotional need.
It's just about feeling I am where I belong. It may not be the best, sunniest, etc etc place in the world. But when I am there I feel truly at home.
So Jacqueline--these are the kind of things we mull on here, as you have seen--and you are welcome!
Tina
Jackie
#8059
Re: OVER 50's+ MOVING BACK TO THE UK - Part II
Found this board today and was so happy to read all of the comments. Made me feel quite at home, even though I have been in the USA for well over twenty years. Really trying to decide if I should go back to my roots, and the decision is tough since all of my children are here, but my Mum is in the UK and I miss her terribly.
#8060
Re: OVER 50's+ MOVING BACK TO THE UK - Part II
Yes Tina, very fair summary...I might just add for Jacquelines benefit, that I came from Las Vegas, as did Rodney, and there is no other place like it, as you can imagine it very vibrant and there is never a loss for something to do. I think that is the reason I had a hard time adjusting here.
Maybe all of us need to think about the times we're happiest - the times when we feel most alive - and analyze what it is that we love so much before making such a big move.
For me, even though I live 15 miles from the most exciting city in the world, my spirits don't lift when I'm there. My spirits lift when I go for a walk in the woods, or down by the river, or when I visit one of the small Connecticut towns to look at the antique shops. The only time I went to Las Vegas I was miserable ... until we left and went to Zion national park in Utah and then I was in heaven.
For a city lover, my ideal home would be boring. Actually, maybe I should move in with Jackie's parents
#8061
Re: OVER 50's+ MOVING BACK TO THE UK - Part II
That's a really good point. It's important to think about what makes you happy and then make sure you're heading back to a place that gives you that.
Maybe all of us need to think about the times we're happiest - the times when we feel most alive - and analyze what it is that we love so much before making such a big move.
For me, even though I live 15 miles from the most exciting city in the world, my spirits don't lift when I'm there. My spirits lift when I go for a walk in the woods, or down by the river, or when I visit one of the small Connecticut towns to look at the antique shops. The only time I went to Las Vegas I was miserable ... until we left and went to Zion national park in Utah and then I was in heaven.
For a city lover, my ideal home would be boring. Actually, maybe I should move in with Jackie's parents
Maybe all of us need to think about the times we're happiest - the times when we feel most alive - and analyze what it is that we love so much before making such a big move.
For me, even though I live 15 miles from the most exciting city in the world, my spirits don't lift when I'm there. My spirits lift when I go for a walk in the woods, or down by the river, or when I visit one of the small Connecticut towns to look at the antique shops. The only time I went to Las Vegas I was miserable ... until we left and went to Zion national park in Utah and then I was in heaven.
For a city lover, my ideal home would be boring. Actually, maybe I should move in with Jackie's parents
Jackie
#8062
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Sep 2009
Posts: 1,197
Re: OVER 50's+ MOVING BACK TO THE UK - Part II
Yes Tina, very fair summary...I might just add for Jacquelines benefit, that I came from Las Vegas, as did Rodney, and there is no other place like it, as you can imagine it very vibrant and there is never a loss for something to do. I think that is the reason I had a hard time adjusting here....basicly I am just a spoiled brat.. As I have said before, everyone has different reasons for moving back to the UK..but I do think you really have to visit for a while, because when all the newness, and favorite food, and things wear off, and it becomes your reality..thats what you have to decide if you can live with.
Jackie
Jackie
Good point about your coming from Vegas...returnees do need to think about the place they are currently living vs what kind of place they'll be living in in the UK.
Your advice to visit for a while before the final decision is good.
Tina
#8063
Re: OVER 50's+ MOVING BACK TO THE UK - Part II
Thanks for confirming I got the gist of your story right.
Good point about your coming from Vegas...returnees do need to think about the place they are currently living vs what kind of place they'll be living in in the UK.
Your advice to visit for a while before the final decision is good.
Tina
Good point about your coming from Vegas...returnees do need to think about the place they are currently living vs what kind of place they'll be living in in the UK.
Your advice to visit for a while before the final decision is good.
Tina
The "holiday" mode is great if you are in Hawaii, England or Timbuctoo, but the everyday nitty gritty reality is the true test.............
#8064
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 1,610
Re: OVER 50's+ MOVING BACK TO THE UK - Part II
:drink wine:
Can you guess.....we have had an offer on the housewe sign the contract tomorrow. Someone did the math and decided they could afford it we had to take a little less but I am at the point were I just want to get out. We now have to look for a rental for 6 months till Gabby is ready but it will be heaven to relax and just enjoy the time with my daughter. Just got to pass the inspection
Can you guess.....we have had an offer on the housewe sign the contract tomorrow. Someone did the math and decided they could afford it we had to take a little less but I am at the point were I just want to get out. We now have to look for a rental for 6 months till Gabby is ready but it will be heaven to relax and just enjoy the time with my daughter. Just got to pass the inspection
#8065
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Sep 2009
Posts: 1,197
Re: OVER 50's+ MOVING BACK TO THE UK - Part II
Can you guess.....we have had an offer on the housewe sign the contract tomorrow. Someone did the math and decided they could afford it we had to take a little less but I am at the point were I just want to get out. We now have to look for a rental for 6 months till Gabby is ready but it will be heaven to relax and just enjoy the time with my daughter. Just got to pass the inspection
HOORAY HOORAY HOORAY HOORAY
Thank you for telling us!!!
Tina
#8066
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Sep 2010
Posts: 681
Re: OVER 50's+ MOVING BACK TO THE UK - Part II
:thu mbs_up:
Can you guess.....we have had an offer on the housewe sign the contract tomorrow. Someone did the math and decided they could afford it we had to take a little less but I am at the point were I just want to get out. We now have to look for a rental for 6 months till Gabby is ready but it will be heaven to relax and just enjoy the time with my daughter. Just got to pass the inspection
Can you guess.....we have had an offer on the housewe sign the contract tomorrow. Someone did the math and decided they could afford it we had to take a little less but I am at the point were I just want to get out. We now have to look for a rental for 6 months till Gabby is ready but it will be heaven to relax and just enjoy the time with my daughter. Just got to pass the inspection
#8067
Re: OVER 50's+ MOVING BACK TO THE UK - Part II
Can you guess.....we have had an offer on the housewe sign the contract tomorrow. Someone did the math and decided they could afford it we had to take a little less but I am at the point were I just want to get out. We now have to look for a rental for 6 months till Gabby is ready but it will be heaven to relax and just enjoy the time with my daughter. Just got to pass the inspection
#8068
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 1,610
Re: OVER 50's+ MOVING BACK TO THE UK - Part II
I'm still on cloud nine, we still have to wait for it to pass inspection but if all goes we will be out of here Sept 15th.
#8070
Forum Regular
Joined: Jun 2009
Location: Canada
Posts: 144
Re: OVER 50's+ MOVING BACK TO THE UK - Part II
:drink wine
Can you guess.....we have had an offer on the housewe sign the contract tomorrow. Someone did the math and decided they could afford it we had to take a little less but I am at the point were I just want to get out. We now have to look for a rental for 6 months till Gabby is ready but it will be heaven to relax and just enjoy the time with my daughter. Just got to pass the inspection
Can you guess.....we have had an offer on the housewe sign the contract tomorrow. Someone did the math and decided they could afford it we had to take a little less but I am at the point were I just want to get out. We now have to look for a rental for 6 months till Gabby is ready but it will be heaven to relax and just enjoy the time with my daughter. Just got to pass the inspection
I can't tell you how happy I am for you, after all this time working towards your goal you can now see the finish line somewhere in the future. How does your Husband feel about it? Elizabeth