Back in uk 6months after 6 years in Aus perth/adelaide now confused
#46
Re: Back in uk 6months after 6 years in Aus perth/adelaide now confused
Some great replys here, certainly given me a lot to think about. I am still struggling though and am reaching the time I need to decide in the next few weeks.
Some days I wake up and have decided to stay in the uk another 6 months to give it more of a chance, like some of the people here have recomended. Then other days I wake up and feel like I carnt wait to get back to aus, just looking at rentals over there last night fills me with excitement, but I just dont know what to do!.
I think the indecision is starting to send me a bit crazy
Some days I wake up and have decided to stay in the uk another 6 months to give it more of a chance, like some of the people here have recomended. Then other days I wake up and feel like I carnt wait to get back to aus, just looking at rentals over there last night fills me with excitement, but I just dont know what to do!.
I think the indecision is starting to send me a bit crazy
#47
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Joined: Jan 2011
Location: The REAL Utopia.
Posts: 9,910
Re: Back in uk 6months after 6 years in Aus perth/adelaide now confused
I can certainly understand your feelings, it is quite literally your life we are talking about. Everyone is different and that is what we need to remember. The thought of staying here fills my wife with dread, she has never wanted to be in Australia and never will. The problem is when you are going through a tough time you tend to look at the alternative through rose coloured glasses, all you see is blue skies and beaches and lovely flowers
#48
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Joined: Jan 2008
Location: Near Kingston, Ontario
Posts: 1,316
Re: Back in uk 6months after 6 years in Aus perth/adelaide now confused
Some great replys here, certainly given me a lot to think about. I am still struggling though and am reaching the time I need to decide in the next few weeks.
Some days I wake up and have decided to stay in the uk another 6 months to give it more of a chance, like some of the people here have recomended. Then other days I wake up and feel like I carnt wait to get back to aus, just looking at rentals over there last night fills me with excitement, but I just dont know what to do!.
I think the indecision is starting to send me a bit crazy
Some days I wake up and have decided to stay in the uk another 6 months to give it more of a chance, like some of the people here have recomended. Then other days I wake up and feel like I carnt wait to get back to aus, just looking at rentals over there last night fills me with excitement, but I just dont know what to do!.
I think the indecision is starting to send me a bit crazy
#49
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Joined: May 2007
Location: England
Posts: 4,211
Re: Back in uk 6months after 6 years in Aus perth/adelaide now confused
I can certainly understand your feelings, it is quite literally your life we are talking about. Everyone is different and that is what we need to remember. The thought of staying here fills my wife with dread, she has never wanted to be in Australia and never will. The problem is when you are going through a tough time you tend to look at the alternative through rose coloured glasses, all you see is blue skies and beaches and lovely flowers
#51
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Joined: Dec 2006
Location: Now Devon
Posts: 951
Re: Back in uk 6months after 6 years in Aus perth/adelaide now confused
Some great replys here, certainly given me a lot to think about. I am still struggling though and am reaching the time I need to decide in the next few weeks.
Some days I wake up and have decided to stay in the uk another 6 months to give it more of a chance, like some of the people here have recomended. Then other days I wake up and feel like I carnt wait to get back to aus, just looking at rentals over there last night fills me with excitement, but I just dont know what to do!.
I think the indecision is starting to send me a bit crazy
Some days I wake up and have decided to stay in the uk another 6 months to give it more of a chance, like some of the people here have recomended. Then other days I wake up and feel like I carnt wait to get back to aus, just looking at rentals over there last night fills me with excitement, but I just dont know what to do!.
I think the indecision is starting to send me a bit crazy
I spent most of 51 years in Australia, mainly in Adelaide, and although I can think of many things which I liked, no place is perfect. I miss the modern building projects and wide streets, but I don't miss the dazzling sun which can
be quite debilitating and potentially dangerous in the summer.
Everything is nearly ready for me to move into my new home in Devon, I've compromised on location, further from London than I intended, but it is a totally new modern build, just as I would have expected in Adelaide if I had stayed there. It will be a new life with a lot of challenges, whereas there were none left for me in Adelaide.
#52
Re: Back in uk 6months after 6 years in Aus perth/adelaide now confused
I can certainly understand your feelings, it is quite literally your life we are talking about. Everyone is different and that is what we need to remember. The thought of staying here fills my wife with dread, she has never wanted to be in Australia and never will. The problem is when you are going through a tough time you tend to look at the alternative through rose coloured glasses, all you see is blue skies and beaches and lovely flowers
#53
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Joined: Oct 2008
Location: Perth
Posts: 6,775
Re: Back in uk 6months after 6 years in Aus perth/adelaide now confused
The weather here this year has been just fantastic so far. We have had 2 days of snow which cleared up by the next day.
This week the weather has been so warm I have had to open the windows and am sitting here in short sleeves in MARCH!!!
The spring flowers are all coming up daffodils, crocuses, hyacinths, etc. The cherry and apple blossom trees are all bursting with flowers. I am sitting here now looking at all this out of my window, the sun is shining and it's just lovely, and how about this we have wild parakeets in these here parts!!!
I couldn't believe my eyes yesterday when I saw flashes of green birds, I thought I must have imagined it but no - I checked with a neighbour!!!
http://news.bbc.co.uk/local/surrey/h...00/8286707.stm
This week the weather has been so warm I have had to open the windows and am sitting here in short sleeves in MARCH!!!
The spring flowers are all coming up daffodils, crocuses, hyacinths, etc. The cherry and apple blossom trees are all bursting with flowers. I am sitting here now looking at all this out of my window, the sun is shining and it's just lovely, and how about this we have wild parakeets in these here parts!!!
I couldn't believe my eyes yesterday when I saw flashes of green birds, I thought I must have imagined it but no - I checked with a neighbour!!!
http://news.bbc.co.uk/local/surrey/h...00/8286707.stm
Still it sounds very promising.
That's interesting the fact that those green parrots have taken up residence in Surrey. They certainly would add a splash of colour to the landscape.
Sad if they find the need to cull them though.
#54
Erica
Joined: Jan 2006
Location: Berkeley, CA
Posts: 98
Re: Back in uk 6months after 6 years in Aus perth/adelaide now confused
Some great replys here, certainly given me a lot to think about. I am still struggling though and am reaching the time I need to decide in the next few weeks.
Some days I wake up and have decided to stay in the uk another 6 months to give it more of a chance, like some of the people here have recomended. Then other days I wake up and feel like I carnt wait to get back to aus, just looking at rentals over there last night fills me with excitement, but I just dont know what to do!.
I think the indecision is starting to send me a bit crazy
Some days I wake up and have decided to stay in the uk another 6 months to give it more of a chance, like some of the people here have recomended. Then other days I wake up and feel like I carnt wait to get back to aus, just looking at rentals over there last night fills me with excitement, but I just dont know what to do!.
I think the indecision is starting to send me a bit crazy
#55
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Joined: Apr 2004
Location: CHELTENHAM, Gloucestershire, England
Posts: 1,494
Re: Back in uk 6months after 6 years in Aus perth/adelaide now confused
It's an absolute fact without any shadow of doubt whatsoever - the general nature of us, the British people - if this was Paradise on Earth with everything we need at our disposal no mattrr what - we would still find something to whinge and whine about and go around looking miserable. It's the way we are as a nation I'm afraid.
#56
Re: Back in uk 6months after 6 years in Aus perth/adelaide now confused
Hi Dave, I know what you mean about the indecision driving you crazy. Awful! And, if you are anything like me, I find I am so easily swayed and influenced. I have been back for 18 months from California and, as it turns out, my US husband wants to go back which I am really sad about. If I were you I would give it at least a year or 18 months before you decide because it seems to take that long to get used to things again and to settle in. I got really depressed for the first 6 months of being here and I kept thinking "what the hell have I done!". I found it really hard, the negativity, the darkness, people looked really unwell, it all just felt very drab after being in California. However, it took another 6 months to really start to see all the wonderful things about England - and in my opinion there are so many. I am glad you have quit that awful job! Many people have suggested moving and I would recommend the Costwolds! It is very beautiful and the people here are just lovely on the whole, it is a very creative area and peaceful. What I did was to get involved as much as possible in as many different activities as I could. Sometimes it felt really hard but, gradually I started to feel better and more at home, made friends and gradually the clouds cleared for me. So, I think you should give it time, another 6 months or so before you decide because the shock to the system when you first move back is very real and hard and takes a while to overcome. Why did you want to come back here from Aus in the first place? Do those reasons still stand? Good luck with whatever you decide. Erica.
All the things you said about it being a bit drag, people looking unwell, negativity, darkness are all things I have thought as well. You might be right about needing to stay over a year to fit back in but I am worried that I will get to settled and then not get the chance to move again.
What if I stay and circumstances tie me down and I can never get out again. I am at the point now where I need to decide to take another job which will keep me here a year or wether to leave now.
I worry that if I stay I will get used to it all again, I will accept it and become stuck and never leave again. I can imagine it happening easily enough but I think some things would frustrate me here, the small streets and houses all being crammed on top of each other, the extra bills, the low wages. I dont think these things will change but if I stay I might just start accepting them and complaining about them all the time, like others do.
One thing I will never get used to is the amount of people here, whenever I want to go somewhere or do anything there seems to be hoards of other people swarming around!. When I grew up here I was used to it but now that I have seen how different perth was the sheer number of people here does bother me
Just take a look at this picture of a beach a couple of days ago...
http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage...itll-last.html
#57
Erica
Joined: Jan 2006
Location: Berkeley, CA
Posts: 98
Re: Back in uk 6months after 6 years in Aus perth/adelaide now confused
Wow! That looks truly awful! It isn't nearly so crowded here in Gloucestershire! There is alot of new building going on though. You don't say why you wanted to come back to the UK in the first place. Would those issues still be there if you went back to Aus?
#58
Re: Back in uk 6months after 6 years in Aus perth/adelaide now confused
Thanks for some great posts, I have reread them quite a few times.
Well I am taking some time now to figure out what to do next.
Like some of you I thought that going back to my home town would be a bad idea so when I returned to the UK I chose Milton Keynes instead, mostly as I thought it might be a little bit more like aus, with bigger streets and more spread out newer style.
After 6 months back I think I have almost decided to go back to perth.
The uk winter didnt bother me that much, sure it was cold but it only actually snowed for about 4 days and I didnt have any problems with it. I was surprised how short and mild the winter was, I remember it being much worse.
Its certainly shorter and easyer to deal with than the perth summer heat.
The thing thats surprised me the most and is swaying my decision is peoples attitudes. In my work I have been really surprised, stopped in my tracks almost by some of the negative, nasty things people say, particularly over the phone. I have had people go off at me over the smallest things, not just complain but angry insulting rants. Theres just no need for it.
I have been working at one of the worlds largest companies and expected a more professional person to be working there, boy was I wrong. Its also a strange atmosphere as well, walking into the office and having not one person say good morning or hello. I even got told off at my performance review as I was 1 minute late for 3 days in a MONTH. I thought they were joking at first, but no, they weren’t.
Before you say it, yes it could just be a bad company to work for and yes I am considering finding another one before I judge the country based on bad experiences at one company, but when I look back I can think of 3 other places I worked at in the uk many years ago that were just as bad. But back then I would have put up with it and not known any better.
Well I have just left the job, after giving a months notice and the end of it kind of sums up the uk work attitude for me. When I finished at my last australian company, they gave me a present and a $70 voucher then we went out for a meal and then went to play some pool. Another aus company took me out for a meal as well when I finished.
I leave the UK company, I get a few handshakes with some of the people I actually liked, have to return all items and desk stationary which is carefully ticked off a list then get escorted out of the building!.
My australian companies all thought I was brilliant and told me so often, I felt a bit awkward about it sometimes. The uk firm despite me breaking all the stats and performance indicators of everyone there, beating people who had been in the department years, the best I got was 'your doing ok'.
The more I way up the positive people in australia to the negative ones here in the uk the more I think my decisions a simple one. Dont get me wrong I have met a few nice people in the uk, just few and far between, and they have been a lot harder to get to know.
I am going to take this month and decide, its a big expensive thing to do as some have said.
I love reading the comments on this great site so please let me know what you all think, sorry to ramble on so much!
Well I am taking some time now to figure out what to do next.
Like some of you I thought that going back to my home town would be a bad idea so when I returned to the UK I chose Milton Keynes instead, mostly as I thought it might be a little bit more like aus, with bigger streets and more spread out newer style.
After 6 months back I think I have almost decided to go back to perth.
The uk winter didnt bother me that much, sure it was cold but it only actually snowed for about 4 days and I didnt have any problems with it. I was surprised how short and mild the winter was, I remember it being much worse.
Its certainly shorter and easyer to deal with than the perth summer heat.
The thing thats surprised me the most and is swaying my decision is peoples attitudes. In my work I have been really surprised, stopped in my tracks almost by some of the negative, nasty things people say, particularly over the phone. I have had people go off at me over the smallest things, not just complain but angry insulting rants. Theres just no need for it.
I have been working at one of the worlds largest companies and expected a more professional person to be working there, boy was I wrong. Its also a strange atmosphere as well, walking into the office and having not one person say good morning or hello. I even got told off at my performance review as I was 1 minute late for 3 days in a MONTH. I thought they were joking at first, but no, they weren’t.
Before you say it, yes it could just be a bad company to work for and yes I am considering finding another one before I judge the country based on bad experiences at one company, but when I look back I can think of 3 other places I worked at in the uk many years ago that were just as bad. But back then I would have put up with it and not known any better.
Well I have just left the job, after giving a months notice and the end of it kind of sums up the uk work attitude for me. When I finished at my last australian company, they gave me a present and a $70 voucher then we went out for a meal and then went to play some pool. Another aus company took me out for a meal as well when I finished.
I leave the UK company, I get a few handshakes with some of the people I actually liked, have to return all items and desk stationary which is carefully ticked off a list then get escorted out of the building!.
My australian companies all thought I was brilliant and told me so often, I felt a bit awkward about it sometimes. The uk firm despite me breaking all the stats and performance indicators of everyone there, beating people who had been in the department years, the best I got was 'your doing ok'.
The more I way up the positive people in australia to the negative ones here in the uk the more I think my decisions a simple one. Dont get me wrong I have met a few nice people in the uk, just few and far between, and they have been a lot harder to get to know.
I am going to take this month and decide, its a big expensive thing to do as some have said.
I love reading the comments on this great site so please let me know what you all think, sorry to ramble on so much!
Sorry to hear you are having such a rough time but I agree with other on here - give it another six months if you can!
I just thought I'd contribute as I am currently working in Oz but looking at coming home, main reasons? I miss my family and I have had 4 years of working with the biggest d***heads I have ever met in my life! Seriously!
I'm a paramedic and in the UK I got on well with most of the people I worked with, we always had a laugh, watched each others backs and put our patients first. Here the medics I work with are SO competitive, stab each other in the back, bitch about each other incessantly and always 'big' themselves up beyond belief. I am seriously appalled at their attitudes, behaviour and the belief that anyone from overseas has zero to offer in terms of knowledge or experience.
I did have a chuckle at one of the other posts on here which stated the Aussies were all rah rah rah, oy oy oy because they are and after a while it gets so tiresome. Don't get me wrong, I have met some awesome people here who I will hopefully keep in touch with but I am really over it. There must have been reasons why you upped and left in the first place so try another 6 months and hopefully you will get another job with a company that appreciates you and makes you feel valued.
Good luck! B
#59
Re: Back in uk 6months after 6 years in Aus perth/adelaide now confused
Re the beach, avoid the south east!
Bet you could find space to sun in the south west or on some of the gorgeous beaches in Yorkshire. Then there's the moorland all around the country and gorgeous open country walks.
Bev
Bet you could find space to sun in the south west or on some of the gorgeous beaches in Yorkshire. Then there's the moorland all around the country and gorgeous open country walks.
Bev
#60
Re: Back in uk 6months after 6 years in Aus perth/adelaide now confused
1. I felt like I was cut off from the rest of the world, I would hear news from family back in the uk or read websites and compare to perth where not much ever seemed to happen and I felt like I was not a part of the world anymore.
2. I missed family, as most of us do
3. I didnt like the lazy slack working attitude there, even turning up for work seemed to be a chore for people and I would go in everyday and wonder how many havent actually bothered coming in today. I got frustrated with the slackness. Coming back to the uk I found the exact opposite, loads of rules and regulations for everything, to a ridiculous degree, a strict monitoring of stats and performance down to the minute by minute level. After seeing the two extremes I think the aussie way might have the best after all. Certainly less stressful.
4. I always felt like an outsider, people would constantly ask me where I am from, call me a pom, act suprised to learn I was a citizen. After 6 years I got fed up with people acting like I had just landed yesterday.
5. I was in an unhealthy relationship and was separating from my partner of 15 years, she stayed in perth. I guess I am wondering if I mixed up my feelings of wanting to get away from that situation with my feelings about australia, I guess part of me wanted to get as far away as possible and I might have let that cloud my feelings.
So some of these things will still be present if I did go back to aus, but might have just been in my head, maybe I can get past them.
I dont know.
Moving is a big expensive decision, I am confused, I dont know what to do, stay or go back to aus...
Any advice/opinions are much appreciated