Mitzyboy

Im watching SKY News who have two people out there on scene and there is no mention of any of this at all.

simon876

Some interesting things to think about.

This story raises the spectre of worry that must haunt all parents from time to time. It also raises questions about the actions of the police and the media, and the fear of crime.

Are the parents to blame? How often do parents believe that they have taken an acceptable risk by leaving their children alone? I guess every parent (to some degree or another) has taken a calculated risk. Perhaps leaving children asleep, locked indoors was felt to be enough? Maybe it's not for me to say. I like to think I might have done something different - or would I?
How often do we suppose that a moments inattention comes to nothing. But what do we feel when letting go of a child's hand, or being distracted for a moment only to find that an innocent and trusting child has gone missing?

Some years ago, whilst serving as a police officer, I was in charge of a search for a 3-year old boy who had gone missing whilst with his father and 10-year old sister.
All three had been on a boat when the father had agreed that the two children could walk the 50 metres to a local sweet shop. The father had ensured they were safely off the boat and continued to work on board. He was only alerted to the absence of the boy when his daughter said that she couldn't find her brother.
I became involved and an extensive search took place. There was huge local support - many members of the public were involved (it was a Bank Holiday) without us finding the boy.
In the meantime, we had to consider the possibility (however unlikely) that the child had fallen into the water. Eventually, the boy was found dead - under the boat. This was a desperately sad case.
Subsequently it was determined that he had most likely slipped between the boat and the mooring while his sister was not looking and while his father had believed them to be safely on shore.
Needless to say, the father was extremely upset and blamed himself. However, did he reasonably do all that he thought was necessary? After all, the boy and his sister were familiar with the location and had vistied the shop many times before.

I guess what I am trying to say is that we all take risks, but I am not trying to condone negligence. We all make judgements that are felt to be 'reasonable' at the time and have to live with the consequences.

So what about the media and the fear of crime? Let's not forget that much of what we 'know' is often filtered, restricted by law and presented to suit the particular agenda of some sections of the media. That's not to say this isn't an horrific situation for the child and the parents but we do need to understand that we cannot possibly know all the facts.

Let's also not be carried away on a tide of moral panic about "weirdos" and "perverts". The reality is that most child sex offenders (if that is what this case is about) rely on knowing and creating a bond of trust with their victims (recent reports regarding the Church of England are a case in point). This 'grooming' takes place over a long period and, sadly, often takes place within what many regard as 'safe' relationships. The media portrayal of predatory offenders is frequently far from reality and does help sustain the discourse of "it's not safe to let your child out these days".

This is a tragic case. There will be debate and dissection of the police response. There will be a very public critique of the role of the parents. However, the fact that this has attracted so much attention also highlights the relative rarity of the event. The fear of crime is often disproportionately higher than the reality.

Mine is only one view. I know others will will have stronger and contrary views. What I like and support about this forum is the opportunity to air ones views and see them challenged and/or supported.

Over to you....

Simon

Mitzyboy

I'd agree with you Simon, but the threads on this forum have been going round and round in circles with unsubstantiated claims and thoughts.

I don't want this thread to turn in to another cycle of "were the parents to blame" I'm afraid, and I hope everyone will appreciate that and afford the parents the benefit of the doubt until all the facts are finally known.

In the meantime we all just hope that she is found safe and sound, especially with the new offer of 1 million for information leading to her recovery.

Cleri

Well said Mitzyboy

alentejo joe

simon its a shame the police force is not up to standards when you were one,now i feel there is so much red tape we protect the guilty

JenJen

Ok so it's not 20 years ago but that long ago in most towns and villages kids as young as 3 or 4 were out playing in the streets supservised maybe by a brother(s) or sister(s), people didn't lock their doors when they went to the shop or at night, most neighbourhoods were deemed safe.

I am probably over cautious and wrap my kids in cotton wool too much, I still don't let my 6and 8 yr old play at the nearby park cause I can't see it from my house.
But i've heard friends who lived out that way talk about it being like the old days here, a safe environment where the kids play out in the streets, the area is very family friendly. I think it would probably be very easy to let your guard down in a place like that, not so easy here where crime is a daily issue be it gun crime, break ins, murder, assaults.

As a parent it's hard to watch this story unfold, it pulls at all your emotions, it is a testament to their character strangth and beliefs how they are able to function and get through each day. I hope there aren't too many more days before she is found unhurt.

I do think that the Portugese police force should collaborate more with the Uk force and Spanish if thats where it's suspected she might be, I think we need experts from whatever country to come in and work together and step it up as much as possible.

Jen

Ka Ora!

The family friendly places are nice if you can find them but even then theirs some twisted git lurking. and its could be in the room next to you because you never really know anyone that well.

JenJen

Poor little girl. I think through this everyone has learnt that no where is safe even if it seems so.

Jen

Cleri

Ive just heard they are looking for an american man who lives in Luz,who drives a white van and hasnt been seen since the abduction

crispy

OH my, I do hope this comes to an end soon, the more little might what must she be going through in a way I hope she is sedated so she is un-aware of where she is. Does that sound really dreadfully?

gazz

seems to me that if there are family freindly areas, that these unfortunately are exactly where these types are to be found is it not,so reasons to be even more on guard?

KarmaLiber

I read your message a while ago and it really upset me. I've tried to work it through my mind so that I do not respond with anger. I just think it is too early and presumptious to fear a worst case scenario, and I do understand that, yet at the same time, I am personally driven to positive thoughts about the situation and want to keep that positive moment going.

Yes, the darkest of things could have happened and no-one wants that.Yet at the same time, whoever knows where Maddy is, needs to know that there are people thinking of them too, and praying for them to do the right thing. They have the opportunity to make things right and to give Maddy back.
I'm sure they don't want to harm her, and they won't feel good about themselves, but allow that opportunity for them to do the right thing without fear of what people think. Every human has a heart, its a case of helping them to discover that, and to know that. They have the opportunity to make hundreds of thousands of people respond to them with joy, by letting Maddy go back to her parents.

I hope and pray for them, that light shines on them, and that Maddy is protected by all the guardian angels and is home soon with her Mummy and Daddy and family.

Karma

zerohero

Totally agree.The British press has a lot to answer for.Their unrelenting negativity is also the reason many British people in the UK are not aware of/do not appreciate the many good things about life in Britain - its really not that bad.
Good luck to the parents,police and all helpers with finding this little girl.

zerohero

A very thoughtful and informative post.As everyone should be aware the situation is not helped by the overly critical and negative British press.I just hope this child is found safe and well.

JenJen

Unfortunately I think they represent a degree of british people who seem to be critical and negative about others I know numerous people like this and they tend to think they and theirs are exempt, they don't make mistakes they would do better in whatever situation, their kids do no wrong yadayada yada.

However I continually fail to see how the sort of attitude be it press or public helps in a situation like this, if you're going to say something stand up in public and push hard for people to be aware there are dangers at every corner that nowhere is 100% safe, push for parents to watch their kids closer, heaven knows there are enough accidents near where I live because little children aren't supervised crossing the road, on play equipment and then oddly enough the parents normally blame everyone or everything else but themselves and I also think that sort of attitude is wrong.

I view it as ok it's happend now it's highlighted the issues with regards child safety, too late to stop it from happening to maddie but the world media coverage will hopefully show all parents round the world these days no where is as safe as it may seem.

An I thikn the parents wanting this to be covered as widely as possible yes get her picture out there anywhere and everywhere use whatever means at your disposal, its great that peole are willing to put a vast amount of money forward as the amount thats up now may lead to the betrayal of the person or people who have her, Get it in the news on the radio in every country and I hope that it gets results.

I don't think it should be restricted to maddie's case all missing children deserve the same coverage I've seen on the news portugese families upset as they were assigned 3 officers and little media coverage and their kids have been missing 8 years.

Use it all to advantage and bring her back where she belongs


Jen