Me and My Family

Old Nov 15th 2016, 5:35 am
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Thanks for your replies and I agree to a large extent on whats being said. I am becoming more assertive now that crunch time is coming. That being my impending divorce which I am awaiting for through the post. She wants to get married after the divorce but I feel now is the time to assert myself before I propose. I can handle the pouts now although they are not nice but I have all the trump cards. She needs to understand that I am not a pet dog and sometimes I like to do what I want.

She hates me going out alone yet she will go out 2 or 3 times a day to her mothers house or whatever. I have no problem with her going out....it gets boring stuck inside the house. Sometimes when she is out for a while I will go out for a stroll along the beach via her mothers house. Then I get the 20,000 questions of why am I going for a walk alone. Maybe she thinks I am going to get drunk on the beach and go chasing other women! But then I get texts every 5 mins to make sure I am still alive or not chatting up another lady. Or whatever. This scenario led to another pout a couple of nights ago.

Her waddly sister asked her to go with her to watch a basket ball match the other evening. Lovely lady asked me to go also and I politely refused. I would prefer watching paint dry. So she said she would be a couple of hours or so and I said I might nip to the beach for a swift half. As you do. I knew that was like poking a wasps nest with a large stick and I was correct. Cue bulldogs face. Anyway, she told her sister she was not going and we sat in silence all evening and she slept in the other bedroom.

How do these pouts finish I hear you chorus? Simple. Ignore first and then when its time for a walk to the beach I always ask if she wants to come. This is ignored in silence initially, but once I get ready to go by myself, she comes with me. Then at a click of a switch, she is my lovely lady again as if nothing has happened. But she will not talk about it. Which is a shame.

regards
Wow. It's all about her.

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Old Nov 15th 2016, 8:12 am
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Default re: Me and My Family

Originally Posted by Millhouse
Wow. It's all about her.
Welcome to the Philippines.

You have to realise that filipino's as a race appear very immature in our western eyes.
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Old Nov 15th 2016, 10:08 am
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Originally Posted by Gazza-d
Welcome to the Philippines.

You have to realise that filipino's as a race appear very immature in our western eyes.
I read or heard somewhere that God dropped 100 million kids on 7,000 islands and told them to run it as a country. Quite apt really.
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Old Nov 15th 2016, 11:02 am
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Originally Posted by Stokkevn
I read or heard somewhere that God dropped 100 million kids on 7,000 islands and told them to run it as a country. Quite apt really.
I also heard that you should never let a pinoy anywhere near anything with an engine.
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Old Nov 15th 2016, 11:36 am
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Originally Posted by Gazza-d
I also heard that you should never let a pinoy anywhere near anything with an engine.
They work on the principle that if you can't fix it with a hammer, you have an electrical problem.
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Old Nov 15th 2016, 2:31 pm
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Default re: Me and My Family

Originally Posted by Gazza-d
I also heard that you should never let a pinoy anywhere near anything with an engine.
Not sure if your comment was serious or just humor, but here in UAE, the complete opposite is true. Most of the main car dealerships employ Filipinos in the workshops, they are held in high regard for their mechanical skills.
I have several Filipino engineers in my Engineering Dept and they are very well educated and highly skilled.
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Old Nov 16th 2016, 4:43 am
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Thanks again,

I will take your comments in order:

Millhouse...yes you are right, "its all about her". I make no apologies for that but that is how this subject has morphed over the last 2 years. It was originally about retiring here in Sipalay but I have found that I only post here if something comes to mind that I want to share. I guess if I got no interest or responses then I would not be on page 56. It would have finished a long time ago. However, I take your point which has been mentioned before and therefore request Admin to change the subject title to "Me and My Philippine Family" if that is possible.

Theres a few comments about the characteristics of the Filipino/a. I tend to agree with whats been said but I will say what has NOT been said and I hope no offence is taken. It is a given fact that the average IQ of a Filipino/a is 86. Now, that is easily balanced by many other positive characteristics they have. We all know what they are. The theory behind the low IQ from what I have read is one word. Rice. Rice contains traces of poison (arsenic) which has an effect on the brain, amongst other things if eaten in large quantities. I will say no more on that.

D. Mashael: I can believe you when you say how well educated and skilled they are over there. I doubt if they had got the jobs if they were not.....they would be still here in the Philippines. If they have those attributes then they can earn far better money as OFW's. But I'm afraid all I see is poor workmanship here due to lack of skills I guess. Its documented on these pages somewhere. E.g. Yesterday, one of my circuit breakers became faulty and tripped out the AC and hot water after about 4 mins. Should be an easy fix. 2 guys came with new circuit breaker and the AC worked a treat on testing. But the hot water didn't. I came back after 30 mins to find immersion heater being stripped down and someone poking about with the breaker circuit. Now, the heater worked fine before all this, and they diagnosed a faulty wire inside the circuit breaker board. And will have to come back later. I told them the fault was with low water flow which happens now and then during the afternoon. Immersion heater now works fine and they haven't come back to replace "the faulty wire".

Off to Bacolod tomorrow to renew Visa. Oh joy! Her father got wind of this and said he had no more e-juice and can I get him some. No money was proffered. I said I don't get the e-juice there any more because it has not been properly tested. Only 280 peso for 50 ml. I get mine from the UK now which is expensive and about 1200 peso including p + p. Plus 112 peso tax. He said he will pay that. We will see...but I bet he wont. If he doesn't then he will get no more until he does. The annoying thing is he swigs back Red Horse most nights....he has the money. He has two sons in Bacolod who could get the cheap e-juice for him. But enough is enough now. Oh, he was eyeing my e-cig and wants one the same. No problem I said. His eyes lit up but that quickly changed when I said it would cost HIM about 2000 peso. And no mention of the 1500 peso he still owes me from a few months ago. I feel a Grrrrrrr coming on!

Regards

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Old Nov 16th 2016, 5:22 am
  #833  
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Thanks again,

I will take your comments in order:

Millhouse...yes you are right, "its all about her". I make no apologies for that but that is how this subject has morphed over the last 2 years. It was originally about retiring here in Sipalay but I have found that I only post here if something comes to mind that I want to share. I guess if I got no interest or responses then I would not be on page 56. It would have finished a long time ago. However, I take your point which has been mentioned before and therefore request Admin to change the subject title to "Me and My Philippine Family" if that is possible.
Sorry, I wasn't clear. not your posts, in fact I love reading them. I mean, the relationship and how its dealt with... she seems to take an "all about her approach" but I'm inferring that only from what I read of course which is selective.

And yes, in the UAE, if you want something done properly you generally go to a pinoy.

And when I say properly, I don't mean "well" or "correct" - I mean, not a total f'ing hash of it like the Indian will.

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Old Nov 16th 2016, 5:40 am
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Hi Millhouse,

Yes, you are right....very selfish attitude and if she doesn't get her own way then she adopts tampo mode. I have lost count of the number of times she is going back to Kuwait, packed her bags, locked herself in the bedroom and gone back to her mothers house. Fortunately, I am laid back and I let her rule the roost within boundaries. But she is learning. Went for a walk by myself this morning whilst she was visiting her parents house. Popped in, said good morning to her and them and I did not get the Gestapo treatment. I can say this though. I have never got angry with her and I don't want to. But patience and understanding is key. Sometimes that does wear thin.

But I think the topic should be changed to "Me and My Philippine Family" which appears more appropriate now. Starring my lovely lady, waddly sister, worm boy, sloth girl and "I want Red Horse" father and brother....plus supporting cast. I will leave that to Admin.

Regards

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Old Nov 16th 2016, 6:16 am
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Originally Posted by Millhouse
And yes, in the UAE, if you want something done properly you generally go to a pinoy.

And when I say properly, I don't mean "well" or "correct" - I mean, not a total f'ing hash of it like the Indian will.
Same as in other ME countries. A friend took his land-cruiser to a garage because when idling the exhaust just tapped against the rear bumper. When he got back the Indian proudly started the car up and showed that the exhaust did not touch the bumper. On closer inspection the exhaust pipe had been cut - just in front of the rear wheel, about 1m in front of the bumper.

The workmanship here is bad but that is two reasons, one is that you can walk out of your house in the morning and say "I think I will be a plumber today" no experience or education in it necessary. The other reason is that all the good ones disappeared of to the ME and other places for a half decent wage. I am lucky, my local mechanic spent about 8 years working for a company I know in Qatar, he is very good.
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Old Nov 16th 2016, 1:09 pm
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Thanks again,

I will take your comments in order:


Should be an easy fix. 2 guys came with new circuit breaker and the AC worked a treat on testing. But the hot water didn't. I came back after 30 mins to find immersion heater being stripped down and someone poking about with the breaker circuit. Now, the heater worked fine before all this, and they diagnosed a faulty wire inside the circuit breaker board. And will have to come back later. I told them the fault was with low water flow which happens now and then during the afternoon. Immersion heater now works fine and they haven't come back to replace "the faulty wire".

All due respect, but when you say 2 guys came with new........., how did you come across these 2 guys? I have read it many times on this and other forums about shoddy workmanship etc etc. Whilst I don't doubt their experience was as described, my experience is quite the opposite. My house that I am having built in Davao is close to completion, in fact I will take possession next month. I can honestly say that everything in the build, electrical, plumbing, plastering, painting, glazing, roofing is as good as anything I would expect to get back in England. I employed a top notch contractor, architect, draftsman, electrical engineer and I am totally satisfied. True it wasn't the cheapest, but then like everything in life, you get what you pay for.

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Old Nov 16th 2016, 1:14 pm
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Originally Posted by springsteen11
Hi Millhouse,

Yes, you are right....very selfish attitude and if she doesn't get her own way then she adopts tampo mode. I have lost count of the number of times she is going back to Kuwait, packed her bags, locked herself in the bedroom and gone back to her mothers house. Fortunately, I am laid back and I let her rule the roost within boundaries. But she is learning. Went for a walk by myself this morning whilst she was visiting her parents house. Popped in, said good morning to her and them and I did not get the Gestapo treatment. I can say this though. I have never got angry with her and I don't want to. But patience and understanding is key. Sometimes that does wear thin.


You already know my thoughts on your situation, so need for me to get into that. I can only think one thing......"Bugger that for a game of soldiers"

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Old Nov 16th 2016, 1:30 pm
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Originally Posted by David Mashael
All due respect, but when you say 2 guys came with new........., how did you come across these 2 guys? I have read it many times on this and other forums about shoddy workmanship etc etc. Whilst I don't doubt their experience was as described, my experience is quite the opposite. My house that I am having built in Davao is close to completion, in fact I will take possession next month. I can honestly say that everything in the build, electrical, plumbing, plastering, painting, glazing, roofing is as good as anything I would expect to get back in England. I employed a top notch contractor, architect, draftsman, electrical engineer and I am totally satisfied. True it wasn't the cheapest, but then like everything in life, you get what you pay for.
Don't hold your breath. If you used local components they will all be substandard and have a very short life. I shipped all UK cable and sockets etc and wired myself. I sent a UK shed consumer unit to my brother in law, disconnect and two breakers. Nobody knew how to connect it up, that's local electrician or engineer from the local power company. It sat in it's box until I visited last month. I've seen architect built houses with burnt out outlets where the wiring is so shoddy.

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Old Nov 17th 2016, 12:45 pm
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Originally Posted by David Mashael
my experience is quite the opposite. My house that I am having built in Davao is close to completion, in fact I will take possession next month. I can honestly say that everything in the build, electrical, plumbing, plastering, painting, glazing, roofing is as good as anything I would expect to get back in England. I employed a top notch contractor, architect, draftsman, electrical engineer and I am totally satisfied. True it wasn't the cheapest, but then like everything in life, you get what you pay for.
I think that having a service provided here is very much the luck of the draw.

I was lucky with my house build, most problems were plumbing ones, a few cracks appeared in the first few months, nothing serious and no movement since then, not surprising when over 200 tons of concrete is plonked in one place.

The water system is gravity fed as we are not connected to any water system ( there is none here ) but there is a leak somewhere under the house that can loose up to 750ltrs a day. This I have solved by pumping a wood sawdust slurry round the system and leaving it under pressure for a while. Only have to do it every 5 or 6 years and normally only after cleaning the pipes. The plumbing design drawings I signed off look nothing like what I got, but my fault for not checking before he got final payment.

Subsequent work on the house was initially carried out by a contractor but I found out that despite paying good day rates they were absolute rubbish. Since then I have used the local pedicab riders who for a fraction of the price provide a very good service, are willing to learn and even come back to ask for references when they manage to get another job. Just one example was painting the house - contractor 7 men for 5 weeks, pedicab riders 2 men on day rate took 9 days and a better job, they both got a 3 day bonus and a case of beer each. They were well chuffed.
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Old Nov 18th 2016, 2:52 am
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Greetings,

Her father works for the City Hall and has contacts there. This is where the two electricians came from. They have been here before. Not returned yet to fix the "broken wire" in the junction box where all the breakers are housed. AC and hot water all still good. This is the 3rd unit fitted in the 18 months I have been here so I agree about the quality. Think the last one cost about 350 peso if my memory serves me correct. Not been asked for any payment. Yet.

David: I agree about your comments.....*not me for a game of soldiers* If I was reading this topic, I would be the same also!

I am told that most Filipinos are selfish and she is no exception to that rule. I have been very tolerant of this in the past but the time has come to bring about change. Hence the spate of Pinay Pouts recently. But she is learning thankfully.

She likes to have her own way and will try to manipulate me into a situation which I do not want. Wont give examples for brevity reasons but generally if she wants to do something or go somewhere and I say no, she engineers it so that I really have no choice. I am wise to that and watch out for it.

I have a load of old audio tapes but frowns when I play them. Ok...German Industrial Music etc is not everyones cup of tea! Normally play them when she goes out but she had a habit of turning it off when she comes back in and puts the radio on. Cured that problem. Same as music DVD concerts. I only put them on when she is not watching her favourite tv programmes in the evening. That is normally only Sunday evening. When I dare to play them on Sunday, she disappears into the bedroom with both her mobiles. One for each ear I guess. Which is good....because I can play the music louder. And have a sneaky beer.

We were invited to a dinner tomorrow night at her friends place a couple of hours away. I normally go (reluctantly) but because my beloved Arsenal are playing at 8.30 pm Phils time I said I would not go. I am now on alert for contrived reasons to get me to that dinner.

Anyway....we shall see.

Regards

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