morpeth

What implication- why on earth do you believe anything she says ? Just stop imagining more reasons to support your chronic fear, Move on.

Millhouse

71 wow. She is almost doing a social service. I wonder if the watermelons are for him or her.

Don't worry P11 about how she will introduce him to the family etc... I'm sure that this guy isn't the last, and you weren't the first. I think you just lasted the longest.

Philosophical 11

This rumour did not come from her. I suspect I know her better than you not to discount her threats. I have seen the paper work. Better to be prepared than just ignore the threats. It will be at my cost.. Not yours

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morpeth

you have posted on a public forum so it would be normal to have various comments made-what else did you expect ? if the overall impression is you are gullible and manipulated for years one would think perhaps you should consider your judgement in this matter has been by your own posts faulty. if you have seen the paperwork of something not filed , one would assume you would consider whether prepared to further manipulate you, or legal seek a competent attorney. your last two comments are really out of line since you are the one who initiated this forum. I realize maybe your pride may be affected by some comments but they are all well-meaning. your obsession to continue the drama through continued contact with her, her family and mutual contacts just prolongs the matter. if you knew her so well hardly over the years would you express surprise at her antics, and now you wish to monitor the FB account of another Expat. get over it and move on, your fear of what this crazy person might do dissuades you from the best defense which is to cut off contact and time you spend monitoring all this.

MartynK

P11, I understand that you're under stress - perhaps more so than is necessary - but that's another matter, and I strongly suspect that you aren't thinking very clearly. Your 'wife' may well have been communicating with another man but you are making assumptions. These carry no legal weight, unless you can provide proof, and communicating doesn't constitute adultery.

The crux of this is the legal status of your relationship with your 'wife'. If you are married, she may have a case/claim for abandonment, loss of support or something of the sort, but she will have to provide proof if she alleges that there's another woman involved. Mere suspicion, or assumption, doesn't cut it.

If your 'wife' was already married when your marriage took place she committed bigamy and is in potentially serious trouble. The marriage is void, she was your girlfriend, and you are free to leave, consort with other women or behave as you please. You really need to get clarity on this, and surely an attorney can apply to court for a copy of the records?

I do understand that foreigners are at something of a disadvantage when it comes to legal disputes in the Philippines, but I suggest you just wait this one out. Stop prying into some geezer's Facebook account and trying to second guess your 'wife'. Cut off all communications and let her make the running. If she serves you with a summons, or whatever, you will know what you're dealing with and the onus lies on her to prove the truth of her allegations, not on you to disprove them or develop a defence without any clear indication of where this is going. Get a lawyer to look into her marriage records if you want to do something useful. In the meantime, you seem to like military analogies, so keep your powder dry.

Red_Wine_Fairy

I suspect that P11 has taken this FB friendship rather hard. Although he never seemed particularly bothered when he thought she was cheating with a local guy or possibly still with the husband/father of children all that time ago, now that she has potentially swapped him for an even older model (P11 71 vs new guy 77) who is probably rather richer too, he's realised that just perhaps people were right: It always WAS about the money, that she never actually loved him the way he loved her. I have some sympathy for him because it's forcing him to rethink everything he ever thought was true about his relationship, and who in their village/friend-group exactly was 'in on it'. It's a trust thing,, and it's a painful process. He has given up a lot to be with her and she has proven the critics right.

So P11, let the American have his turn at her (because she only sees the dollar signs, and that makes her a professional). if she doesn't fool him, she'll hop back on FB to find and fool the next one. Maybe three or so years from now you can have a beer with him and listen to a similar story of families needing rehousing and family members needing educating....

mikek1

A very accurate post. Unfortunately there are many lonely heart foreigners who seek romance and companionship on Facebook etc. If only they spent the same amount of time reading all the horror stories advising against such honey traps, they might think twice.
The good thing about P11 discovering this new man on the block is that I suspect that all communication FROM the L/L will come to an abrupt end, she has more affluent fish to catch.

Philosophical 11

*****you have posted on a public forum so it would be normal to have various comments made-what else did you expect*****Did I say otherwise? I always welcome constructive comments.

******your obsession to continue the drama through continued contact with her, her family and mutual contacts just prolongs the matter.***** There is no obsession from me. As already stated I have no direct contact with her.

****** now you wish to monitor the FB account of another Expat********For very good reason as I have explained before. But I will repeat again for your benefit..... If the rumour is true, then it will weaken her case against me. Also, she may well hit it off with this guy and decide to leave the litigation alone. However as I have stated previously, the rumour came from a very strange source. Now, it could have come from her initially knowing it will get back to me. To get me back over the last few months she has tried being nice.....then came the threats to frighten me back.....how about trying to make me jealous? Nope....that wont work either. She has no direct contact with me so she cannot prolong the threats, this could be just another ruse to get me to come running back to her.

Philosophical 11

Your two paragraphs.....you are stating the obvious of which I am already aware.

Third paragraph.....As previously stated again....I have already had clarity on the matter from two different attorneys. Yes, an attorney needs a court order to obtain her records but I don't require to do that. As it stands at the moment she is a bigamist and our marriage is void. It is up to HER to prove otherwise....not me. If she has taken out claims against me, she will appear in court to pursue her claims against me, But as a bigamist. Doubt if that will sit well with any judge. She should have cleared her name first before filing against me.

The FB thing....as previously stated, it is intel. Intel is important in any conflict so preparations can be made .

Regards

Philosophical 11

******]I suspect that P11 has taken this FB friendship rather hard****** On the contrary. I view that as good news for me for reasons I have already stated. I have no feelings for her any more....they rapidly diminished after I set out what I wanted to do and after I cut her off. But bear in mind this could be a ploy to get me jealous by starting the rumour herself.

Regards

abner

Well *that* was more convincing on several fronts than pretty much any of your previous posts about moving on from LL, particularly in terms of being receptive to professional legal advice.

Hearty congradulations, P11, I hope you make a clean break of the situation from here forward.

abner

But the proof will still (ultimately) be in the pudding.

Once any legal jeopardy is over, are you sure you'll resist the temptation to track what's going on with her new BF? i.e., will you actually move on?

That's not a challenge, nor any form of insult, but rather the bar you will finally need to meet, to close this unfortunate episode in your life.

Philosophical 11

Thanks... But this all been explained before. Guess it's just a matter of waiting to see if any thing materialises. Any subpoena has to be legally served in person. If it is not served the court will dismiss the case

Regards

Philosophical 11

To put it quaintly.... I won't give a toss on what's going on in her life. I am looking forward to a new chapter in my life

Regards

Philosophical 11

Thanks for deleting JG... Tried to do it myself but after completing the relevant box and hitting delete... It keeps asking if I want to leave the site.

Regards