Me and My Family

Old Dec 2nd 2019, 4:15 pm
  #3601  
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Default Re: Me and My Family

Originally Posted by RedApe View Post
Family Law of the Philippines

P11...I suppose you are referring to Art. 147 which days with cohabitation of an unmarried couple. I would point out however that you have discontinued the cohabitation. If there is another clause (or a court decision) that is relevant could you please supply it. Part of the problem here is that you simply state that there is some issue with Abandonment. But that applies only when there is a LEGAL MARRIAGE, not one that is nullity from the beginning or annulled. There can be requirements to support children from the union (remember, it was not a legal marriage) but the other individual is not a spouse.

"When a man and a woman who are capacitated to marry each other, live exclusively with each other as husband and wife without the benefit of marriage or under a void marriage, their wages and salaries shall be owned by them in equal shares and the property acquired by both of them through their work or industry shall be governed by the rules on co-ownership.In the absence of proof to the contrary, properties acquired while they lived together shall be presumed to have been obtained by their joint efforts, work or industry, and shall be owned by them in equal shares. For purposes of this Article, a party who did not participate in the acquisition by the other party of any property shall be deemed to have contributed jointly in the acquisition thereof if the former’s efforts consisted in the care and maintenance of the family and of the household

Neither party can encumber or dispose by acts inter vivos of his or her share in the property acquired during cohabitation and owned in common, without the consent of the other, until after the termination of their cohabitation.When only one of the parties to a void marriage is in good faith, the share of the party in bad faith in the co-ownership shall be forfeited in favor of their common children. In case of default of or waiver by any or all of the common children or their descendants, each vacant share shall belong to the respective surviving descendants. In the absence of descendants, such share shall belong to the innocent party. In all cases, the forfeiture shall take place upon termination of the cohabitation.

Abondoment does not just apply to legal marriage..... Read what I have stated again.

Regards
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Old Dec 2nd 2019, 6:06 pm
  #3602  
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Default Re: Me and My Family

Originally Posted by Philosophical 11 View Post
Abondoment does not just apply to legal marriage..... Read what I have stated again.

Regards
Everybody understands what you're stating, but it seems to be contrary to the laws everybody else is quoting. It may be helpful if you could provide an official source to back up what you're saying i.e. the laws you feel are relevant and which state that it applies to cohabitating couples as well as those who are married.
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Old Dec 2nd 2019, 7:03 pm
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Default Re: Me and My Family

Originally Posted by GeniB View Post
I have only just seen ( and read part of ) this very long thread. I feel the OP's pain in it. The expectations of loneliness in the future too perhaps .There is no happy ending . The woman has been found out, she is highly unlikely to take this to the courts.She knows legally she is in the wrong .Letting go is hard, but it's what the OP must do . He's already half way there . Just cut the remaining strings. and leave it to her now. Get on with his own life.I wish him every success with that .
I am looking forward to reading that he has cut all contact and has moved on. I will love to read him building a happier life.

When a man and a woman who are capacitated to marry each other, live exclusively with each other as husband and wife without the benefit of marriage or under a void marriage
This seems relevant enough to my eyes. They were not capacitated to marry each other at all . She is married just not to P11.
P11 lawyer should be able to clear that up pronto if there are concerns.
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Old Dec 2nd 2019, 7:24 pm
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Default Re: Me and My Family

I would tell her she had to sign an official, legally binding statement saying that she has no right and will not be claiming any money from you now or in the future. If not threaten her with prison time.

She has led you a merry dance P11. Her and her family have lied, manipulated and bled you for every penny they could. Time to get tough and tell her in no uncertain terms to sod right off.
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Old Dec 2nd 2019, 7:41 pm
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Default Re: Me and My Family

Originally Posted by Jerseygirl View Post
I would tell her she had to sign an official, legally binding statement saying that she has no right and will not be claiming any money from you now or in the future. If not threaten her with prison time.

She has led you a merry dance P11. Her and her family have lied, manipulated and bled you for every penny they could. Time to get tough and tell her in no uncertain terms to sod right off.
Absolutely, time to man up.

ATEOTD who cares about the laws whatever they are, even if they did apply, which I don't believe they do.

Let her know straight, pursue this at your peril, and be prepared to follow it through.

Some people, and I fear P11 is one of them , are not cut out for Asia.

He needs to realise that he has all the cards now . So play the game accordingly.
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Old Dec 3rd 2019, 5:58 am
  #3606  
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Default Re: Me and My Family

Originally Posted by nonthaburi View Post
Absolutely, time to man up.

ATEOTD who cares about the laws whatever they are, even if they did apply, which I don't believe they do.

Let her know straight, pursue this at your peril, and be prepared to follow it through.

Some people, and I fear P11 is one of them , are not cut out for Asia.

He needs to realise that he has all the cards now . So play the game accordingly.
I think your comment about not caring about the laws suggests that it is you that is not cut out for Asia. We are guests in their country... And that is a poor attitude you have. I have been here for 4 years and I would never wish to leave this country.

I am aware that I have all the cards and playing them in the correct way. I don't need to flout laws in the process as you suggest.

Regards
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Old Dec 3rd 2019, 6:13 am
  #3607  
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Default Re: Me and My Family

Tell ExLL to address her ideas to your lawyer. She will quickly drop her ideas of entitlement.
Stop communicating with her or through some "messenger" (like you mentioned).
Until then she will keep on trying to twist your arm.
She has learnt long since that eventually you will give in.
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Old Dec 3rd 2019, 7:08 am
  #3608  
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Default Re: Me and My Family

Originally Posted by Thairetired2016 View Post
Tell ExLL to address her ideas to your lawyer. She will quickly drop her ideas of entitlement.
Stop communicating with her or through some "messenger" (like you mentioned).
Until then she will keep on trying to twist your arm.
She has learnt long since that eventually you will give in.
I don't need a lawyer right now except for advice. She knows where she stands on entitlement and that will be left to the family court. In view of her bigamy I suspect she will be entitled to very little if anything. She is most certainly not twisting my arm because she cannot. On the contrary she wants me back which is what I expected.
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Old Dec 3rd 2019, 7:42 am
  #3609  
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Default Re: Me and My Family

Originally Posted by Philosophical 11 View Post
I don't need a lawyer right now except for advice. She knows where she stands on entitlement and that will be left to the family court. In view of her bigamy I suspect she will be entitled to very little if anything. She is most certainly not twisting my arm because she cannot. On the contrary she wants me back which is what I expected.
If she works at it long enough she will suceed.
My impression.
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Old Dec 3rd 2019, 8:23 am
  #3610  
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Default Re: Me and My Family

Originally Posted by Thairetired2016 View Post
If she works at it long enough she will suceed.
My impression.
Whether or not she succeeds is entirely up to P11, but I know she'll be pulling out every trick in the book, and probably inventing new ones, to get him back. She has been proven to have no scruples, she's happy to be a leech, and she doesn't love or probably even like P11. It's all about her and what she can get out of him. Shameful.
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Old Dec 3rd 2019, 8:35 am
  #3611  
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Default Re: Me and My Family

Originally Posted by Philosophical 11 View Post
I am aware that I have all the cards and playing them in the correct way.
This is a phrase you have used multiple times over the years, and each time you have actually had good cards you have subsequently thrown away all the good ones (i.e. getting married to a complete nutter and overlooking all the red flags when you had an "out"). I hope that you have learned something from these mistakes and don't burn your newly found pack of aces.

I'd make it very clear that to her that you have sufficient evidence to put her in jail and expect never to hear from her again. In the meantime, I would file the official complaint - it's a shitty thing to do when judged by western standards but it's really your own ass-covering way out of this situation and perfectly acceptable/normal in the Asian context. I'm just pleased you got out before the rat poison was put in your evening sandwiches as that was where it was heading.
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Old Dec 3rd 2019, 11:04 am
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Default Re: Me and My Family

Originally Posted by Millhouse View Post
This is a phrase you have used multiple times over the years, and each time you have actually had good cards you have subsequently thrown away all the good ones (i.e. getting married to a complete nutter and overlooking all the red flags when you had an "out"). I hope that you have learned something from these mistakes and don't burn your newly found pack of aces.

I'd make it very clear that to her that you have sufficient evidence to put her in jail and expect never to hear from her again. In the meantime, I would file the official complaint - it's a shitty thing to do when judged by western standards but it's really your own ass-covering way out of this situation and perfectly acceptable/normal in the Asian context. I'm just pleased you got out before the rat poison was put in your evening sandwiches as that was where it was heading.
Exactly that. Needs doing.
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Old Dec 3rd 2019, 11:05 am
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Default Re: Me and My Family

Originally Posted by Philosophical 11 View Post
Abondoment does not just apply to legal marriage..... Read what I have stated again.

Regards

And I am asking for your source, not your opinion, on what you believe is the law. As noted above there are strict limitations when there is when there is the expectation of sharing of nuptual property. The law states that such a responsibility only occurs when there has been a legal marriage or cohabitation where the parties COULD enter into a LEGAL marriage. But the termination of cohabitation ends the responsibility for CONTINUED support UNLESS there is a child or children who are products of that cohabitation. IN THAT CASE the wage earner is then responsible to his partner if she is acting as guardian to the children, unless she is a party that has committed a wrong to dissolve the partnership...in which case the children become the beneficiaries through an appointed guardian.

So wife or cohabitant could not enter a legal marriage...that makes her ineligible for continued support.
Even if she were in a legitimate status of cohabitation (which she ain't) that support terminated when the cohabitation ended.
Unless there were children born of the product of that cohabitation...of course. Then the wage earner is responsible for "child support" paid to the guardian. That does not apply in your situation.

Please show me this other abandonment law that applies to bigamous wives that allows them to earn support from the man she cheated in perpetuity????
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Old Dec 3rd 2019, 12:08 pm
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Default Re: Me and My Family

Originally Posted by Philosophical 11 View Post
I think your comment about not caring about the laws suggests that it is you that is not cut out for Asia. We are guests in their country... And that is a poor attitude you have. I have been here for 4 years and I would never wish to leave this country.

I am aware that I have all the cards and playing them in the correct way. I don't need to flout laws in the process as you suggest.

Regards
I'm not going to get into some long winded essay about why I believe you to be wrong but I will say this.

I've managed to survive half my life in Asia thus far, still married to the same woman I might add. I've yet to find myself in the position you are .

Your comment re laws is laughable, considering the care that you ex showed regarding the law. And of course I'm sure that everyone in the Philippines follows the law to the letter, no one breaks the law, there are no traffic violations, no corruption and so on and so on ad infinitum.

If the past four years teaches you one thing , let it be that you're not in the uk anymore. You're still applying uk thinking to your situation, and until you stop doing that your problems will continue.

I don't want to sound harsh because you seem like a nice guy, but there's a saying about nice guys and you'd do well to remember that.
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Old Dec 3rd 2019, 12:20 pm
  #3615  
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Default Re: Me and My Family

Every single legal or Philippines government document I've read states that Abandonment is defined as 'abandonment by a spouse without justifiable cause for more than one year (my emphasis)

I can't think of many more justifiable causes than finding out that your wife is a bigamist and your marriage is void.
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