Me and My Family

Old Dec 22nd 2015, 5:14 am
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More random thoughts and jottings...

Wish there was a "like" button on this site...but thanks for your thoughts.

Do Philippinos have bad legs? I have pondered this for some time. If someone has to go more than 100 metres, then a tricycle is a must. I wonder how much money the poorer people would have if they realised that legs are for walking. My gf father bought a new motor tricycle about 6 months ago. It has now done 8000 km in that time. How much petrol is that? They live 5 mins walk from here but always turn up on the tricycle. I will work that out when I have another idle moment. Of which there are plenty. Oh, and why when you proffer a 50peso note, a tricycle driver never has any change? After all, he has been out most of the day collecting small change in fares.

You are familiar with the Pinay Pout. You are not familiar with the expression Pinay Flounce although you probably have witnessed it. It is when she (who has to be obeyed) receives a small chiding ....which is not often for fear of the dreaded pout. She will get up ...throw her head back. And walk off. This is followed by an hour of dog house time for me. Danger of these are of course is the full blown Pout.

I have mentioned that you never get a straight answer to the questions...when and where. Thinking about it, it happens to most questions. Assuming she hears me. I asked the other day where she got the chicken from. It was delicious. The answer to this straight forward question was..."why, whats wrong with it". Enquiring what a very nice side dish was a few weeks back, the helpful answer I got was "you had it last week" I have since learnt it is best to leave it at that otherwise it develops into an interrogation. Which can lead to a Flounce. But, I am being unfair. Her English is ok but she sometimes misunderstands what I am asking. I need to learn the language I guess.

Why cannot they respect budgeting for tomorrow and not just for today? Ok, she is very good but others just spend as though there is no tomorrow. Her sisters young son wanted a lechon for his birthday...so a lechon he had. That's another 2500 peso she owes me. That debt has been outstanding for a few months now. And why if they cannot repay on the due date they do not say sorry and explain why? I just get a sweet smile.

Workmanship is a lot to be desired. A new roofing gutter came down a couple of months ago on the first on-set of rainful. Gf thought it was funny. Now, if I had put it up there would be hell to play. We have mirrors nailed in place with 9" nails. With 8" still protruding. I bought a shower curtain and rail complete with brackets. The brackets were thrown away and instead the wall was drilled with two holes and the shower rail inserted with maybe an eighth of an inch inserted either end. Result is you have to open or close the curtain with great care. Otherwise it falls in a heap on the floor. It pretty useless anyway. It is hung about 2' off the floor. Also gf insists on hosing down the bathroom area after a shower. So its a wet room with or without a shower curtain.

Logic. Pinays are blessed with many great attributes. Logic is not amongst them. I can present many examples but here is one. I have a UK/Philippines plug adapter which I use for this lap top. I cannot leave the adapter plugged in alone at night when I disconnect from the lap top. It is a fire risk. The fact that items such as TV, internet, shower water heater which are plugged in overnight and switched off go unnoticed. To avoid Flounces I just remove it when I remember. Anything for a quiet life.

Anyway...that's it for now.

Wishing you all a very merry Xmas and happy New Year.

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Old Dec 22nd 2015, 5:37 am
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And all the very best to you and yours Pete. look forward to you continuing the saga in 2016! Thanks again for the enjoyment.
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Old Dec 22nd 2015, 8:10 am
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Just a couple of observations. Pinay pout is called tampo. Tagalog/visayan for loan is gift and the reason for no change is that the additional white skin tax exactly equals the fare plus the difference.
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Old Dec 22nd 2015, 12:58 pm
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Another point to the observations is that Filipinos do lack a sense of humour, a while ago I was out jetting loose paint off the front gate when two elderly ladies walked past and one mentioned that I should get a houseboy. I saw the chance for a wind-up and took it. I said I was the houseboy from Australia as Madam was married to an Englishman who she put in an old peoples home in England before she moved back to the Philippines. They left uttering the expected tuts and whisperings.

It was not until a week had passed before I found out that my wind-up had back fired. Half the village now believed that my wife had dumped her husband in an old peoples home in the UK and fled back to the Philippines with all his money and now employed a good looking Australian houseboy, this slur on her character did not impress the missus. Needless to say several weeks in the dog house for me until everyone had been put right.

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Old Dec 22nd 2015, 1:31 pm
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Do Philippinos have bad legs? I have pondered this for some time. If someone has to go more than 100 metres, then a tricycle is a must.
I keep getting "Why don't you use your car?" from the locals, it is only a 10/15 min walk to the market so we walk. Here there are mostly the C-Cat ( pedal tricycles ) and I don't fit in those.
Oh, and why when you proffer a 50peso note, a tricycle driver never has any change? After all, he has been out most of the day collecting small change in fares.
Gazza-d got the answer to this one absolutely right.
I have mentioned that you never get a straight answer to the questions...when and where. Thinking about it, it happens to most questions. Assuming she hears me. I asked the other day where she got the chicken from. It was delicious. The answer to this straight forward question was..."why, whats wrong with it". Enquiring what a very nice side dish was a few weeks back, the helpful answer I got was "you had it last week" I have since learnt it is best to leave it at that otherwise it develops into an interrogation.
To be fair this is not just a Filipino problem, in the UK you can ask a bloke where is the post office, the reply would be "Just round the corner on the left", ask the same of a woman and the answer would be "Why, do you want to post a letter?"[QUOTE2]Why cannot they respect budgeting for tomorrow and not just for today? Ok, she is very good but others just spend as though there is no tomorrow. Her sisters young son wanted a lechon for his birthday...so a lechon he had. That's another 2500 peso she owes me. That debt has been outstanding for a few months now. And why if they cannot repay on the due date they do not say sorry and explain why? I just get a sweet smile.[/QUOTE]Sweet smile usually works here, any way budgeting is what accountants and government do. If you really want an insight ask someone who owns a small shop what their profit was yesterday, it normally is the same as the days takings.

Off to pack the presents into boxes, I have counted about 150 wrapped presents ( I am sure there are more ), not bad as my wife said a few weeks ago, we will not give presents to the family this year, just to the God Children.

Jul tidings to all

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Old Dec 24th 2015, 3:50 pm
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Walking is for poor people. It is a question of status. It is like the Essex attitude to buses. Only poor people use public transport in that Universe. Status is everything. Street Cred.
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Old Dec 28th 2015, 5:01 am
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Festive greetings to all!

First...many thanks for your responses and hope you all had a great Xmas. I certainly did.

Our Xmas kicked off on the afternoon of Xmas Eve when my gf and her sister hosted a street party for the local kids. About 40 kids pitched up and they were treated to fun and frolics with games etc. They all got little treats and it was great to see the smiling faces.

Then Xmas eve proper when the family descended on our house and began preparing food and the men drank beer. I got icy stares from gf when I went for my 3rd beer along with her father and his brother. I am used to icy stares! A feast was had at about 11.00 pm (with more beer)....cue more icy stares... and then presents were given out. They all seemed happy with what they got bearing in mind they were not expensive. But I guess they were expecting that. Proceedings ended about 1.30 am after more icy stares.

Xmas day saw me as Santa distributing gifts and treats around the city with the gf. It was great to see the happy smiles and the look of surprise on their faces. This was the first time Santa had been to Sipalay in living memory. I am told New Years Eve will be something special!

However, there was a black spot. I said to the gf that I would buy 100 small gifts for Santa to distribute on Xmas Day plus treats when they ran out. Instead we bought 50 I think and she said it was enough. I thought that was strange. She then carefully wrapped the gifts which I thought was not necessary but she insisted. Who am I to argue? But I thought it too was strange. Anyway, a few days before Xmas she dropped in conversation that the gifts that I had bought would be used for her and her sisters childrens street party. Now, maybe I was wrong but I protested. I had bought the presents for my use on Xmas Day not for her use for the party the previous day. It made sense now why she only bought 40 and wrapped them carefully. She relented, but I thought it was a devious plan of hers. Or maybe just a misunderstanding. I like to think the latter. But, I get the sense that her family thinks I have reneged on a deal. Maybe I am wrong. Once that was sorted I again offered to help sponsor the street party. I gave her 500 peso to help buy some more presents. They brought treats instead. I did originally offer 1000 peso when I first heard of the street party a couple of months ago. They were lucky to get the 500.

Gf is now selling gold jewellery to her fb friends...going ok. More detail on the "Small Business" thread.

She seems happier and more secure. Maybe because it is the festive season or because I have started her off on her pension and got my life insured. Her philhealth is paid for one year.

Had a surprise about the house keys this morning. I wrote a few pages back about how I was unhappy about the duplicates being held by her father. I did relent and thought it would be better if he kept them in case we got locked out or something. Anyway, she said she got the keys back. But today, guess what? We got locked out. We went to her fathers house and found he still had the keys. Maybe he forgot to hand them back when we were away for a few days. I don't know. I like to think that. Maybe she never got the keys back in the first place.

However, I guess this illustrates how it can be all smoke and mirrors when dealing with a family. And how sometimes I am treated like a mushroom....kept in the dark and fed on s..t.

Anyway, it was a great Xmas and one I shall always remember. I hope yours was as memorable as mine. Best wishes for the New Year!

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Old Jan 10th 2016, 3:25 am
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Happy New Year all!

Been busy with various birthdays, christenings and the like. I enjoy these and gives me a chance to interact with relatives and their friends. Prefer it when alcohol is served and I join the men for a chin wag. Alcohol makes the conversation flow more easier. Although it is normally just soft drinks. Then I become a little bored after a while and take a walk about for the nearest watering hole. Gf no longer sends a minder after me. Thankfully.

Her on-line business is doing well as described in "Starting a small business" thread. Most of her sales are layaways and her projected profit is about 28k to date. Although I have not seen her collect any money from Palawan or whatever except on one occasion. Maybe its the end of months for payments. Hats off to her!

Had a fb request from someone and must apologise to him because somehow I pressed the wrong button and deleted his message. Try again p lease. But as I say to others, I have a pinay sitting on my shoulders when I go to fb and she sees most chats and messages. She also rifles through my phone for messages etc. Bless her. So I need discretion on fb. Thanks.

Off to Bacolod next week to get her started on her pension which I am paying for. This has made her feel more secure. I have already provided her with Philheath and have life insurance in case something happens to me. Its only a small amount but its a stop gap until I get my finances sorted after my forthcoming separation and subsequent divorce.

The loan honeymoon is over. Yes, I was warned. Loans appear to be gifts now. Before, loans were repaid but now I have about 15k outstanding with little likely hood of getting it back it seems. I just get sweet smiles and excuses. No more loans unless its proven dire emergencies. Her uncle who lives nearby came down with some dreaded lurgy and I told him to see a doc and I would take care of the prescription. Thought that would be about 500p. It came to just over 2k. I didn't mind...I helped him and that is what matters. One guy is a friend of the family and he cuts my hair plus family members. He charges me 350p. Seems a lot for 20 mins work. I wonder if he is having me over. He owes 2k for the last few months and I just get sweet smiles from him and excuses. Will tell my gf that I will not use him again until the loan is repaid. He therefore has a choice. Either repay the loan or he loses his income from me.

I seem to be in the family's bad books since New Year. They and the kids have not come around in the evenings....normally when I try to eat my dinner. Where the father sits next to me and obviously wants a beer. We do not pass their house in the morning en-route to the beach. And I think I know why. Gf has two brothers and did not come home for Xmas. But were here for the New Year. I saw fb conversations with one who was asking about his Xmas gift. We bought modest gifts for all except the brothers. Gf was not bothered about them. I suggested we get a bottle of Emperador (sp) for each and she agreed. On arrival here they both immediately asked where their gift was. That got up my nose and told them it was probably in the same place where their gift to me was. I.E. still in the shops. Gf gave them their gifts that night. Next morning, I was told by them that they got a gift from my gf and where was the gift from me. They got the same answer as before. One apparently lost his wallet and had no money to get back home. Yeah right. Gf gave him 300 peso for his fare back. So it could be that the family think I have shunned the brothers. But I am not bothered. I can eat in peace and my house does not become a play ground for 4 - 5 kids.

Saying all that....gf father came just round with a beef and vegetable lunch for later. Maybe he wants a loan. Or has Red Horse withdrawal symptoms.

This year will be defining. I will be going through a divorce settlement whereby I could be financially raped. Then I could become a poor foreigner. This house has to be sold and the gf wants to get married. I see a few more pages on this story yet. Or maybe it will come to an abrupt end. I hope for the former.

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Old Jan 10th 2016, 6:11 am
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The loan honeymoon is over. Yes, I was warned. Loans appear to be gifts now. Before, loans were repaid but now I have about 15k outstanding with little likely hood of getting it back it seems. I just get sweet smiles and excuses. No more loans unless its proven dire emergencies.
You have got off lightly if you have learned no more loans with only 15k outstanding, everyone I know, including me, had a lot more outstanding before we learned that.
One guy is a friend of the family and he cuts my hair plus family members. He charges me 350p. Seems a lot for 20 mins work. I wonder if he is having me over.
You are being done over unless he has a fancy salon. My hairdresser does hair cut, shave and head & back massage for P40.A good job he does as well, normally give him P100
One apparently lost his wallet and had no money to get back home. Yeah right. Gf gave him 300 peso for his fare back.
I have never met a race that looses it's wallets/purses with such regularity as the Filipinos.

A few years I bought 2 native chickens off a wife's relative, when she turned up she only had one with her, she explained that the other one had escaped - but there was no offer of any money back. When she tries to sell me anything now I say no as it might escape, even if it is some vegetables.
This year will be defining. I will be going through a divorce settlement whereby I could be financially raped.
, I admire your optimism 'whereby I could be financially raped'. I have been on the sharp end of two and lost out twice - 100% hit.

Happy 2016 to All

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Old Jan 10th 2016, 3:06 pm
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Unless you keep your whits about you you can easily be financially raped in the Philippines. The difference is that they smile at you whilst they are doing it.

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Old Jan 11th 2016, 1:01 am
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you're being "robbed" for your haircut. I can go to the local barber here for 40/50p or go to Davids salon in SM Consolacion and get shampoo, head and shoulder massage, haircut, another shampoo and a blow dry for an extortionate 185p!
Lets hope your divorce is not too crippling and you keep posting your trials and tribulations here. you've got a shed load of readers and who knows how many expats have used your experiences to avoid the same happening to them!
Thanks for the enjoyment and Happy New Year!

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Old Jan 12th 2016, 6:27 am
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Originally Posted by quiltman View Post
Lets hope your divorce is not too crippling and you keep posting your trials and tribulations here. you've got a shed load of readers and who knows how many expats have used your experiences to avoid the same happening to them!
Thanks for the enjoyment and Happy New Year!


Also, any update on Worm Boy?
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Old Jan 16th 2016, 4:34 am
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So it appears I am being scalped twice by this hairdresser. But to be fair to him, he never asked for 350 peso...I just asked my gf what I should pay on my first haircut when I arrived and that was the price she suggested which I paid. He is a family friend and I now think I am paying 350 peso for all her family to have their hair cut. But this will end. He will not cut my hair again until I get the 2k he owes. When that happens I will pay whatever is suggested and if its 350 peso, I will ask for Philippine rates next time. Not foreigner rates. To cap it all, his haircuts are pretty crap. He is good with ladies hair though.

Worm boy is still alive and kicking. And eating prodigiously and still looks like a stick insect. He is first in the queue when food is served and always comes back for more. He eats twice the amount of a healthy adult I reckon. Always scoffing between meals and if someone has come back from shopping with bags...he is there. Poking around for food. Went to a funeral the other day. It was an RC church and at the end the priest gives out holy bread or whatever it is. I was surprised he was not first in the queue. At the cemetery he made amends. They give out light refreshments in the way of bread and juice. He hovered around the food station there whilst the final words being said to the deceased. Then wham.....his hand was the first to receive a bag of refreshments. He went back for more. He scoffed all the way back to our next stop for a late lunch at JollyBees.. (hate that place) where he had double helpings of everything. Then scoffed some more on the final journey home. Later that evening, after we got home he helped himself to a packet of biscuits. He did ask because he is a very polite worm boy.

The festive season is over and we had a minor disagreement about going shopping. Long story...boring. This somehow led to her packing all her belongings at midnight into black plastic bags and called for her father to take her to the family house. For the first time, I told her to go. I could no longer reason with her. She told me later she was shocked at this. But her father failed to turn up. Maybe she phoned to cancel the ride. Don't know. So, it ended the same as before.... a weeping pinay. We never went shopping which is what I wanted. 99.9% of the time she is a very loving and caring lady. But the .1% is what concerns me more.

But

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Old Jan 16th 2016, 4:44 am
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Good luck with getting back the 2K you reckon he owes you Pete! Is there no other barber locally? If not can you not wait until you go somewhere else?
The price i pay at Davids by the way is the regular posted price - no foreigner add on.

Love the worm boy stories - a saga in themselves. One of our handymen is exactly the same. Finishes anything that is left, and nibbles on biscuits etc in between!

Keep the updates coming please - gives us all hope!
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Old Jan 16th 2016, 4:53 am
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Thanks Quiltman. Yes...we have local barbers. This worm is now turning....

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