Philosophical 11

No of course not. So why did she wait 3 years before all this came to light? She has the attributes to pick up any guy not far from where I used to live on her return to the Philippines

Regards

Stokkevn

She did not wait 3 years. From very early on you seemed to be paying family bills, accommodation, medicine, rent and a reasonable pocket money for her. It seems to have become obvious when you started to restrict paying family bills to 'needs' as opposed to 'wants', mainly due to her disastrous businesses requiring funds to pay off debts and it was then that she realised that there was not a pot of gold to tap into as you had to reduce family support to finance her debts.

Philosophical 11

I think it is quite normal for expats like myself to help the family as the best we can. I did not pay for the accommodation of her family...that came later. I have already explained why that was the case. I started to pay for the medicine when her father became ill about 3 years ago. That was all I was paying for. I gave her 8k pm from the start as her allowance. She wanted to get a job but I wanted her to stay at home with me. HTH

regards

Jerseygirl

APRIL 8th 2015

Got here at last and thought I would give an up-date.


APRIL 2015...

‘Importantly....I trust her implicitly. Get on very well with her family as previously said and we have come to a compromise over our cultures. We understand each other. I casted aspersions about her family before but although I reckon they are skimming my expenses on the house refurb I have put that down to their culture.’

‘Just found a house to rent and gf has now asked if her sister and child can live in the cellar for 3 months whilst her house is being renovated. I said ok on the proviso she pays her way and helps around the house.’

‘This morning gf sister who has taken over the outbuilding next door and is enjoying rent free accommodation, using our water, electricity, TV and wifi decided to share her music full blast at some ungodly hour. Subtle hint was given to her.’

JUNE 2015

‘Gf announced this morning that her family has to move house again because the house they are renting is being sold. She and her father think it would be a wonderful idea if I bought them a house going for sale at 250k so they never need move again. Her father would pay something each month for the privilege. I said I do not have the money to buy and indeed I would not be able to own the property. Gf is now in a "huff". Dont like the way this is going.... We will see.‘


‘Gf surprised me the other day to say that she wants to work to support her sister who is at college and needs 30000 php for her last years studies. While she was in Kuwait she supported her with her wages but now she cannot without a job. Problem is her nearest place of work is 5hr bus ride away which means I will only see her at weekends for the next year. Her studies cost 48K in monthly instalments but on 30K in one lump sum. I was not too pleased with this so volunteered to pay the 30k myself.’

‘Made the excuse on the grounds that I have just agreed to pay out 30k for her sisters education this year and 5k maintenance p/m and therefore cannot afford to keep spending.’

And it goes on and on and on and on...

As I said...she’s been playing you all long...they all have.

Stokkevn

I thought Waddly and Worm Boy moved in to the house fairly early on and her father used to get his e-cig juice was covered by yourself plus other items marked as medicine.

I don't mind helping the family but I expect to be the last port of call and not the first. I also quite often offered to swap work around the house ( which I didn't really need doing ) for help, that normally sorts out the who were chancing their arm vs the ones who actually need help. To date the only ones who have rocked up to swap work for money have not been family members, they always seem to do a good job for a days pay plus the missus normally fills up a bag with food for their family and treats for the kids.

I have shown my wife this thread ( carefully avoiding telling her my user name ) and she was horrified by the way you were treated by her and her expectations on your finances to cover her family.

thaiing

Remember your first haircut? She suggested 350. That was taking the P..s like everything else. Please accept that you were scammed from day 1. You just could not see it and fail to see it even now. You still cling to the fantasy of lovely lady. Sorry, but you were just an ATM to her and her family.

Stokkevn

My hair cut 5 years ago was P30, but as I was a S.C. I got it for P25, he got a P25 tip. Even now a hair cut and shave only comes to P45

Thairetired2016

Guess you don't want to see it. No money for the gyne and you get shown the letters to Brit. Embassy etc. as a threat. This is "or else".
You must be enjoying this game she is playing with you.
I hope you win in the end.

spouse of scouse

The British Embassy couldn't care less about yours or her private lives, and the BI wouldn't either. And a subpoena for you wouldn't be sent to her. The tirades of abuse and pictures are your own fault, for providing her with the communication channel.

Millhouse

Stokkevn

Agree with your first comment. But a 35/40 yo is well acceptable as long as they keep quite about the 4 kids - Which was part of the scam from day one.

Jerseygirl

First of all she doesn’t disclose the 4 kids...they conveniently slip her mind.

Second she goes fishing on the internet, hooks an elderly guy who is flattered that even a 40 yr old is interest in him. Posting very flattering pics of herself, fawning over him etc etc etc.

scrubbedexpat142

We need to remember - "she may be a wicked woman" but "she's MY wicked woman".

Rete

I do agree with this. Even though she appeared to be well kept, trim and pretty, she is not young, does not come across young, is middle-aged and let's face it, men in their 50's, 60's and above, want a trophy female, be it a wife or gf. These women are in their teens or early 20's. They are not 30 or 40 years old. The 30 and 40 year olds fall into two categories, 1) seize the catch. take what you can and run or 2) marry and live as well as you can happily ever after.

Her bait landed her you. Believe it or not, if there were any other nibbles on her line from someone younger or wealthier, she would not have continued even her online relationship with you.

P11, I understand wanting to keep even a tenacious hold on her and the good part of your lives together and wanting to believe that you were not a fool but loved and valued. You need to relinquish all communication with her. Let her continue to email you or text you but never ever respond. You have no way of knowing what is the truth and which are the lies.

She is like our former neighbor. Neighbor's house was foreclosed on in June, 2019. Sold at auction, sight unseen, in November. She took a loan against her Jeep for $5K when she was notified that the house had been sold and she had to move. She begged sister-in-law for $2.5K for moving expenses. Now she has $7.5K in her bank on December 5. Today, January 5, 2020 she has no money. She was moved by a group of homeless from the shelter and she lived in a motel until social services found her an apartment. She never paid the workers the $20 each for helping pack her house and move the items to storage for her. Now they won't release her belongings. Again, she has no money and when asked where the 7.5K went. She claims she gave it to the bank to help catch up on the back mortgage. BUZZ ... no way. The bank can't accept that money because the mortgage was nullified in June. She couldn't have paid it in November because the house had been sold to a private person. She lies and lies and lies and expects you to take care of her. WRONG!

This women is an elderly version of your LL.

Tweedpipe

Quick, give her address and full details to Phil11.......!! Just the sort of bait he will enjoy nibbling at.
Seriously though, even with all our words of severe warning over the last few years not to walk away but run - FAST, he still didn't see the light. And he still hasn't grasped that maintaining contact with his ex is sheer folly. Even insisting to keep lines open so he knows what she's planning. What a dope!
Like many here, I sincerely hope he enjoys a better, agro-free life away from it all, but I won't bet on it, as he does insist on being his own worst enemy. And it's very difficult to help people like that, as we've all been seeing in this thread.