mikek1

Philosophical 11

Thankyou for your kind words....most welcome at this most difficult time.

Yes, it is very difficult living under the same roof as her now. I just never know when she is going to erupt and as a precaution, I always have my voice recorder on my lap top on standby. I prefer it when she is out with her mates which gives me peace not being on edge and also allows me to get out and about. She arrived home after midnight last night and went straight to her room without a word.

I get on well with her family...nothing has changed there. Her brother who lives just around the corner from me often sees me wandering down the beach on my own. Always asks where my wife is and I just shrug my shoulders. I guess the family know we have an ongoing serious problem. Anyway, he invites me in for a chat and offers to accompany me to the beach. I often see the father driving the refuse truck and always get a big wave and smile. Her uncle, the "gofor" is always happy and smiling....maybe because I always give him a 100 peso tip when he runs errands for us. The rest of the family I rarely see. When her boys and "worm boy" visit, they are always very cordial, albeit a bit shy. Waddly her elder sister appears to have nothing to do with my wife.

Anyway, I will soldier on ....for now. And play it by ear. The pressure is getting to her I feel and its a bit like Mount Vesuvius rumbing. I fear that AD 79 is just around the corner....

Thanks again.

Regards

spouse of scouse

What will it take for you to say 'enough, this is over'? Genuine question which of course you're under no obligation to answer.

mikek1

Philosophical 11

Again thank you very much. I may well have to take up your kind offer soon.

Moving on.....

I believe AD 79 has started. Just after I replied to MikeK1 this morning, my wife asked me for 2k to pay off some of the remaining arrears on her m/cycle which I have been doing over the past few months. I didn't have the money and said I will need to borrow from a good friend. First she said she needed it today (Sunday?) and then it became "now". Long story short....she then went on the usual rampage and I restrained her and then demanded that I give her back her mobile which she lent me some time ago. She wanted to sell it to obtain the money. She disappeared out of the house and I locked the front door behind her. She then came in through the back door into the kitchen and grabbed a large knife and scissors. Again I forcibly disarmed her. She disappeared out through the door and stated she was going to file a report (theft of her phone I guess). Also, she will report what went on before (me having private msgs with our 2 friends which they posted on FB. It was therefore my fault. I have since obtained 2k as promised and now awaiting her. I have hidden the knife and scissors.

Whilst typing this, I received a msg from her creditor basically saying she will contact me on Monday. A superfluous msg....she already knows that I will contact her on Monday. I believe that this morning she contacted my wife and leant on her for the 19k. Hence my wifes tantrums this morning. She had asked why I needed to borrow money when I had withdrawn some the other day. She thought I had withdrawn more than the 5k and perhaps sufficient to pay off the 19k. She was wrong.

Anyway...that's how it hangs at the moment.

Regards

mikek1

Jingsamichty

P11 is certainly not being ridiculed at all. Rather he is being offered excellent advice and support, which, sadly, he is electing to ignore.

I believe that most of us have a great deal of sympathy for P11 and can easily see how it is only his decent nature that has led to him being in the awful situation he is now in.

But it really is time he accepted that this particular game is up and gets out before it's too late. Remember, in this tale there is already a suspicious road-rage death for life insurance reasons... he should in no way be under any illusion that his "wife" would prefer him more alive than dead. He needs to get out, now. But he knows this.

mikek1

BEVS

I agree. Very sensible and a lovely kind offer.

jaygee68

Well said,Jings.Despite the odd apathethic comment on my part,i can honestly say that i do have a great deal of sympathy for P11 and i do hope he comes to no harm.Why do i feel this way?...it's because I have also been thru very similar with my EX and i understand how he feels.I am still going through it now,as i have been blocked out of my daughter's life for the best part of two years,and i believe that another guy( EX'S NEW PARTNER) is going to adopt her as his own!!..So it's tough....very tough at the moment.

I hope that he gets out of this relationship immediately.Otherwise,people's sympathy might start to turn to frustration and incredulity very soon.

Pollyana

lovely offer.

P11, as we speculated before that she may actually be suffering from bipolar or similar, be very very careful with the scissors, knives etc. People with any serious mental condition can be desperately unpredictable. I have lived with a couple of people with serious manic depression, and even they could get extremely violent at times. Bipolar is even less predictable.

Believe me, I am the last person to advise anyone on relationships, but I do know that its desperately hard to accept that sometimes you have to leave, both for your sake and the sake of the other person, especially if they are mentally unwell. However sometimes that decision has to be made, not for the sake of an easy life, but simply to save a life- yours, hers or both.
Take care

Philosophical 11

Greetings...

Many thanks all for your kind messages and support.

Firstly, since she left this morning she has not returned yet. I sent her a msg to say that I have the 2k that she said she desperately needed and so far it has gone unread. I suspect her rage this morning has nothing to do with the 2k. Previously when the installment was due, I was given plenty of notice and it was dealt with as routine. I noted from my records the payments for August and September was not requested by her. I asked her about that this morning and I did not get a coherent answer.

After the rage this morning....seemingly about nothing, I thought about reporting the incident to the police. Before I always decided against reporting anything of this nature to the police because she has friends there. This time after a great deal of thought, I decided to file an incident report.

I suspect that I may have to leave soon as my position is now becoming untenable. I have friends nearby where I can go initially and have a deep think about what to do next. Thankyou MikeK1 for your very kind offer ....I am most grateful.

Regards

nonthaburi

Good luck for the future, whatever you decide . I'm sure everyone who has commented on this thread only wants the best for you, even if we have come across as harsh sometimes maybe.

Anyways , hang in there.

bestvue

I know it's no laughing matter but I'm reminded of the old saying. Chop chop and bobs your Aunty.

Millhouse