Rete

I'm guessing ages but being that she has two known children and neither of the sons are babies or toddlers but from the sound of it over the ages of 9 and a possible third one still out there undiscovered as rumored, I put her in her 40's. My husband's second wife was 18 when they married and he was 36 so I'm not saying that the age difference is insurmountable (although hubby's marriage ended by mutual agreement 16 years later after they lived apart for over 7 years). She could have well started procreating at the age of 13 like many cultures do.

Stress does not cause hormonal inbalance but rather HI can cause stress.

Englishmum

mikek1

Philosophical 11

Greetings!

Many thanks for your responses...I will reply to some of the comments:

Mikek1.....I might have mentioned it before, but I have baulked from reporting the incidences to the police because she and her family have friends there. If my report gets back to her or the family then I suspect this might provoke an adverse reaction. And....on who's side will the police be on? But yes....I take your point and I might have to take that risk. I am not sure what medical qualifications you possess to cast doubts on her hormonal problem, but it has been diagnosed by a doctor following "womens problems" she has had for the past month. Following the visit to the doctor yesterday, she has been prescribed different medication so we will see how that goes. I have added further to this subject further down the page in another comment. Thanks for your offer of support btw.

Stokkevn....... Yes. I have taken these precautions because I listen to what has been advised here. There are many ex-pats who trusted their wife implicitly and are now dead or locked up. In fact there is an American guy interned not 1km away. Trusted his wife of many years. She took all his money....cleaned his bank account out and then allegedly poisoned him. As far as all this trauma occurring in the past few months is concerned.....its because of the stress of the wedding and now being dropped into the fertilizing business by her dealer. Stress affects people in various ways. Also, some can handle stress...others cannot. She patently cannot.

Rete.....I agree with much you say. The foreigner has no chance against a local and family will always stick together. I am aware of that. She might have kicked Waddly out of the house, but somehow they will find me to blame for that. I paid for her sisters education when I arrived.....paid off their rent arrears....loaned money and never got it back.....paid for her fathers maintenance meds with no thanks. All now forgotten. Yep. I know what you are saying. My wife photographed her bruises...not Waddly btw.

You are wrong about hormonal imbalance. I too have looked all this up and as you know we visited the Dr yesterday. She has been diagnosed as having hormonal problems because of "womens problems". This is what prompted the visit to the doctor in the first place. She has had the relevant examinations and scan etc which thankfully proved negative. She is undergoing further medication. If that does not work, she will need a second opinion and probably a visit to the hospital. The Dr agrees that stress is a cause of hormonal problems but there is nothing he can do about that. If that indeed is the cause, then she will have to see a psychiatrist for proper specialist treatment. Stress as we all aware can lead to suicide and irrational and sometimes violent behavior.

Finally....thanks for your inputs. Ps....She is 36 and as mature as a giggling schoolgirl. I on the other hand have just turned 70. Fit, and of sound mind. (I can hear the guffaws). But with a bad back. Probably caused by....stress.

Moving on....

Her mobile phone debt. This if I remember correctly amounted to about 56k with penalties and charges. A visit to the store proved that my wife was correct. It was a 2 year contract ending in March this year. This is when she terminated the payments. However, she forgot she was one month in arrears and this was part of the debt and incurred collection fees and charges etc. Now, this is the interesting bit. According to the small print, she should have notified the company that she wished to discontinue her contract....on its expiration. Otherwise it turns into some sort of rolling contract. I found this explanation to be rubbish bordering on malfeasance. A two year contract is just that. She should not have to notify anyone. Anyway....long story short. They knocked off all the other charges and we walked out vowing never to use them again.

House purchase.... The owner yesterday was insisting that we buy the house or they will want us to move out. Fair point...I have no problem with that. But she had a long face. I said that we could apply for the 500k loan downpayment if they agreed to the banks condition that they sign the title deeds over to us as collateral. Not surprisingly they refused to do this. Then came a msg to say that they have another buyer. Face now pre-tampo. I said yep....no problem. Face now in tampo mood. An awkward hour passed in silence, then came the message ....we can keep renting the house until Gods will (or something like that) allows us to buy the house. This was an immense relief to her. She loved the house and made it into our home. Being ex-military for 24 yrs and move every few years, it was no skin off my nose to move. However, one interesting thing emerged. The landlady has the house title...but not the land title. No proper explanation was forthcoming for that. However, I am not naïve to think that if a buyer did come in....they would sell. Friends of the family or not. I believe it was a bluff to say that they had an immediate buyer.

Following that little drama.....the wife is a lot happier in her demeanor. The threat of losing the house has not helped her mental condition.

All for now

Stokkevn

Do not buy house until Landlady shows she has the title of the land as well. The normal reason for them not having the land title is that there is money owing to the bank and until that is paid the land is owned by the bank who at any time can sell the land to recover their costs, at that point your house will just become collateral damage. I bet your neighbours do not have their land titles either as it is normal practice for the builder to pawn the land to finance the building or the next project. A German friend has his house on that basis for the last 29 years, last year the original owner got all the house owners ( about 50 of them ) together and said they could have their land titles if they paid him to clear the debt ( about twice the original cost ), now they are worried that the bank will sell the land and all be homeless.

Here it is always Buyer beware!

moneypenny20

Just out of interest P11, When you were at the doctors appointment, was it all conducted in English, or in Filipino and she translated?

Millhouse

Philosophical 11

The doctors appointment was carried out generally in English. The Dr is a friend of ex-pats here and when he saw us waiting at no 17 in the queue ....he called us in at no 12 I think. The scan was to see if she has ovarian cancer..or polyps that can cause excessive bleeding. It was negative. Thankfully.

Regards

mikek1

Bealinehx

P11, I am not going to add to the immediate posts. However, on another note and given the family surprises i.e two stepsons and all the associated rumours. Have you had your Marriage Certificate sent to the Philippine Statistics Authority (previously NSO) and have you applied for and received their audited Marriage Certificate. If not easily done online.

Millhouse

are you advising he doesn't?

Bealinehx

On the contrary

Millhouse

I think that's worse.

Philosophical 11

mikek1

Your info regarding the police is comforting. Re the stress issue, I saw what she was going through during the wedding arrangements, you didn't. It is well documented here. Why would she feign stress during this period? I also have ran a business for 20 yrs and yes, it is infinitely more stressful than getting married. However some people cannot handle stress.....hence suicides and blind rage murders. The latter quite common here in the Philippines by women who found their husbands cheating on them. I have mentioned before that I have no intention of buying this house and as far as funds are concerned for medical emergencies....I have a very good flexi-friend.

Regards

Philosophical 11

Bealinehx

My wife mentioned yesterday that we will soon have to go the town hall to get confirmation of the marriage if this is what you mean.