Me and My Family
Jul 29th 2018, 12:02 am
#1726
BE Forum Addict
Thread Starter
Joined: Jun 2014
Location: Philippines
Posts: 1,853
Re: Me and My Family
Stokkevn...
I was married for 44 yrs previously and didn't really want to get married and preferred to "live in sin". Marriage is an institution and a piece of paper and I believe that you do not have to get married to prove anything. However, not everyone shares that view, and out of respect for my partner I am happy to grant them their wish. Because I want to. Hope that answers your question...
Regards
I was married for 44 yrs previously and didn't really want to get married and preferred to "live in sin". Marriage is an institution and a piece of paper and I believe that you do not have to get married to prove anything. However, not everyone shares that view, and out of respect for my partner I am happy to grant them their wish. Because I want to. Hope that answers your question...
Regards
Jul 29th 2018, 12:15 am
#1727
Just Joined
Joined: Jul 2018
Location: Cavity Philippines
Posts: 7
Re: Me and My Family
I have been visiting Phil for 40 years, married to one for 20 and retired here 3 years ago.
There are a lot of long well informed posting here ! HEED THEM
LISTEN AND ACT upon them or as someone says you are heading for big problems.
More than once you mention lack of ‘thank you’s’ ... ‘Thanks’ (Salamat) is not part of Filipino culture, they have the word but rarely use it.
Likewise courteous gestures, hold a door for someone or slow down so they can cross road and you will receive a very suspicious look!
Here is the delicate bit.... you are overwhelmed with your luck, younger gf, got here no big issues etc. UNLESS YOU GET A GRIP it will be your DOWNFALL, which would be rather sad.
Here is a catchphrase circulating amongst ExPats. A bit tongue in cheek but a strong element of truth ‘Filipinos only tell the truth by accident’
Gifts, just one of my many ‘misfires’ numerous Filipino welders use sunglasses for eye protection, very bad news for future eyesight. On one visit I returned from UK with proper self darkening mask for resident ‘handyman’ Handed it over, brilliant, boardering on magic. Three days later back to pink sunglasses. Where was mask? Given to kids because it made the look like Spacemen!!!
Acts of everyday kindness & generosity are view as a weakness to be exploited.
BUT, it’s a great place, just adapt sooner than later. Become a Kuri Pot... tight git, news will travel fast then enjoy your new life.
There are a lot of long well informed posting here ! HEED THEM
LISTEN AND ACT upon them or as someone says you are heading for big problems.
More than once you mention lack of ‘thank you’s’ ... ‘Thanks’ (Salamat) is not part of Filipino culture, they have the word but rarely use it.
Likewise courteous gestures, hold a door for someone or slow down so they can cross road and you will receive a very suspicious look!
Here is the delicate bit.... you are overwhelmed with your luck, younger gf, got here no big issues etc. UNLESS YOU GET A GRIP it will be your DOWNFALL, which would be rather sad.
Here is a catchphrase circulating amongst ExPats. A bit tongue in cheek but a strong element of truth ‘Filipinos only tell the truth by accident’
Gifts, just one of my many ‘misfires’ numerous Filipino welders use sunglasses for eye protection, very bad news for future eyesight. On one visit I returned from UK with proper self darkening mask for resident ‘handyman’ Handed it over, brilliant, boardering on magic. Three days later back to pink sunglasses. Where was mask? Given to kids because it made the look like Spacemen!!!
Acts of everyday kindness & generosity are view as a weakness to be exploited.
BUT, it’s a great place, just adapt sooner than later. Become a Kuri Pot... tight git, news will travel fast then enjoy your new life.
Jul 29th 2018, 12:31 am
#1728
Just Joined
Joined: Jul 2018
Location: Cavity Philippines
Posts: 7
Re: Me and My Family
Noted you also have lots of repairs and refurbishment in hand DO NOT hand over money to work force/relatives/helpers for ‘goods’ you will be scammed into the ground. Go yourself and pay supplier. At the very worse you will incur a bit of ‘SkinTax.
Make it clear to supply owner you will become a ‘Suki’ (Regular) providing he is straight and honest with you. BE FIRM
Example, B-in-law owns a large building and for years has retained a well paid ‘trustworthy’ handyman, he of welding mask fame! Sent cash-in-hand to buy lengths of guttering. Returned with change and ‘official’ receipt. Done a ‘deal’ with salesman and cost had doubled!!!
Make it clear to supply owner you will become a ‘Suki’ (Regular) providing he is straight and honest with you. BE FIRM
Example, B-in-law owns a large building and for years has retained a well paid ‘trustworthy’ handyman, he of welding mask fame! Sent cash-in-hand to buy lengths of guttering. Returned with change and ‘official’ receipt. Done a ‘deal’ with salesman and cost had doubled!!!
Jul 29th 2018, 2:24 am
#1729
BE Forum Addict
Thread Starter
Joined: Jun 2014
Location: Philippines
Posts: 1,853
Re: Me and My Family
Cambslad... Thanks for your well intentioned advice. I have lived here also for 3 years and I am well aware of what you have stated. I don't know where you got the idea that I have lots of repairs etc underway. Maybe when I moved into this house 3 years ago but nothing current. But I am well aware of the culture here in that respect. Thanks anyway...
Jul 29th 2018, 4:41 am
#1730
Just Joined
Joined: Jul 2018
Location: Cavity Philippines
Posts: 7
Invite to Dorothy
Hi to you, your posting style and comments interest me. How about a debate on ‘Mature men/Young Filipino Ladies.
Must not upset our lovely Moderator, so nothing personal, just meaningful and in good taste.
NOTE TO MODERATOR...Should we start another Thread ?
Must not upset our lovely Moderator, so nothing personal, just meaningful and in good taste.
NOTE TO MODERATOR...Should we start another Thread ?
Jul 29th 2018, 3:55 pm
#1732
Concierge
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 46,387
Re: Invite to Dorothy
Yes, please. That is if P-11 is willing to discuss the topic with you. As for discussions on moderators, perhaps you need to read the site rules. As a newbie poster you appear to be crossing a few of the lines with a foot and not a toe. Nowhere on this long thread has a moderator stepped in to stop a discussion or to admonish a poster. They have participated, as you have, and they are free to do so.
Jul 29th 2018, 4:09 pm
#1733
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Feb 2014
Location: Capiz
Posts: 1,646
Re: Invite to Dorothy
Not sure how many there are here. I am friends with/know about 35 European/US guys who have retired or live here part time. I can not think of any that fall into the old white guy/young Filipina bracket. My wife is just 3 years younger than me and a French guy I know is 4 tears younger than his Filipina wife.
Jul 29th 2018, 9:44 pm
#1736
Forum Regular
Joined: Mar 2014
Location: NZ
Posts: 82
Re: Me and My Family
I love being the dirty old man, my wife is 25 years younger than me. I was 46 she was 21, eight years later bloody bliss. She never stops working, doesn't spend a cent and looks after me like a baby. My family and friends think she is wonderful and she looks after my 85 year old mother who lives with us like a sister. I know lots will be saying the same thing I always say that women can be very patient and she will take me for everything in a year or two. In my case my darling will have everything in a year or two so it will work out perfectly. Good on you 11 you may as well have a young wife, my two previous wives were only interested in cleaning me out and they weren't, much younger. Regards Mike
Jul 30th 2018, 9:50 am
#1737
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Joined: Aug 2009
Location: Disneyland, Dubai
Posts: 15,887
Re: Me and My Family
I love being the dirty old man, my wife is 25 years younger than me. I was 46 she was 21, eight years later bloody bliss. She never stops working, doesn't spend a cent and looks after me like a baby. My family and friends think she is wonderful and she looks after my 85 year old mother who lives with us like a sister. I know lots will be saying the same thing I always say that women can be very patient and she will take me for everything in a year or two. In my case my darling will have everything in a year or two so it will work out perfectly. Good on you 11 you may as well have a young wife, my two previous wives were only interested in cleaning me out and they weren't, much younger. Regards Mike
Aug 3rd 2018, 3:12 am
#1738
BE Forum Addict
Thread Starter
Joined: Jun 2014
Location: Philippines
Posts: 1,853
Re: Me and My Family
Age: Age is just a number so I have been told repeatedly. I am 33 yrs older than my betrothed and it does sometimes feel strange. Why do I hear your chorus? Well, I am older than her father, old enough to be her grandfather......and she is younger than my two sons partners. Lovely lady is 36. Is the age difference bad? No of course not. But it would be if she was a mere 18 and I was 51. Eyebrows will shoot up like window blinds. And rightly so in my opinion. Maturity is what counts and at 36 she is a mature woman....although I suspect Filipinas never mature and remain closet school girls. But relationships in the Phils have even bigger hurdles to overcome. First, male and female.....two different species trying to live together. Then you have culture......so very diverse that a lot of understanding and compromise is required. With plenty of patience and an endless supply of humour. Then comes language. Yep....they can speak English, but not necessarily understand what has been said. Cue Tampo's. So....is big age difference bad? It pales into insignificance compared to the other differences I have explained.
Life is good....
Life is good....
Aug 3rd 2018, 3:31 am
#1739
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Feb 2014
Location: Capiz
Posts: 1,646
Re: Me and My Family
Depends on which way round it is. Years ago an actress ( can't remember her name ) and her husband split up when they were in their 80s, he had got himself a 20+ girlfriend, she, to spite him, got a 20+ boyfriend and then on TV claimed that 20 went into 80 a damn site more than 80 went into 20.
Aug 3rd 2018, 5:45 am
#1740
Forum Regular
Joined: Mar 2014
Location: NZ
Posts: 82
Re: Me and My Family
Hi 11, know an Australian 56 married an 18 year old from Binloc the same place my wife is from. She was naive as they come been in Aus eight years and still together. Let the eyebrows shoot up. Young married to old marriages seem to last at least as long as the so called normal age marriages, except us old buggars will not live long enough to celebrate our golden weddings. My outlaws are the same age as me, they are visiting in NZ now they think the sun shines out of my arse, never ask for anything and babysit the brother in laws kids and work for my darling all day asking for nothing. People can go on about culture and all the rest but every relationship is a bucket of honey and wasps and it just depends what you choose to blame when you get stung. In some cases easier to blame culture and family for problems instead of the fact that the guy is just a grumpy arsehole. Regards Mike