Child Custody Case
 

Hi all,

I'm British and live in the UK. Had a fling in the Philippines that resulted in a baby girl being born.

I am fully aware that the law in the Philippines states that no child shall be separated from their mother unless under compelling reasons.

I could potentially have evidence to support compelling reasons and evidence of actions/behaviour that are detrimental to my daughter's health and development. I'll be meeting a lawyer there next month to determine this.

I'm just wondering if anyone here has been through a child custody case in the Philippines, and if so, how did it go?

Re: Child Custody Case
 

The child is a filipino, unless you arranged a UK passport

I think you are going to find this a very expensive way of being told no can do and the time it takes to say that will drag on forever so you pay much much more.

Not wishing to be brutal, but how do you know you are the father and the only 'flinger' in town. You would need to get a DNA test and that may not be forthcoming.

Re: Child Custody Case
 

Thanks for the response mikemike.

Unfortunately, no UK passport for her yet. That was something we were planning to do in the near future.

Before committing to providing financial support and having my name on her birth certificate, I did have 2 DNA tests performs at 2 separate clinics in Manila. And also, after 2 years, the resemblance is uncanny.

I had never planned to take custody or bring her to live in the UK. Unfortunately it seems as if the mother was corrupted by money. Even the paediatrician who saw her a few times told me of her concerns. I went to the local social welfare office and they were pretty useless. Their advice to me was to file a custody case while they conduct a home visit. So for the sake of her health and wellbeing, I'm having to resort to this.

I know exactly what you mean by things being long-winded there. I've experienced it many times for even the simplest of tasks. They do love their paperwork and a receipt out there!

I'm fully aware that it's a long process and that the odds may be against me. A lot of people here have told me to turn a blind eye and focus on my family here in the UK but I'm not that type of person. Just wondering if anyone has had any success or experience?

Re: Child Custody Case
 

Ok at least there are some certainties. all the best

Re: Child Custody Case
 

I am going through something similar at the moment,MS.I do not care if i get criticised for saying this,but what you must understand is that while we have kids because we love them and want to take care of them,some Filipino women like to have kids to use as an asset,or moneymaker,if you will.I would NOT be surprised if you are alluding to child abuse and beatings when you say "So for the sake of her health and wellbeing, I'm having to resort to this."

Some of the Filipino women can be violent and lash out at their kids in an uncontrolled manner when they lose their temper.

Sadly,the mother of mine uses the child as a bargaining chip to get money from myself and others.I honestly do not believe that there is much love in her.I have been denied access to my child for 18 months now and am not allowed to see my child on cam.They are in the Filipines,and i am not,and i fear that my life is in danger should i decide to visit.

I could go down the legal route,but at the end of the day it is a very corrupt third world country where a lot of the people will do anything for cash,no matter how educated and high up the social ladder they are.

I know exactly how painful things are for you right now,and i am minded to contact you by private message,if i may, in the near future,when i am not so busy with other things.I think it might be mutually beneficial if we compare notes about our relative situations.

Good luck.

Re: Child Custody Case
 

Well stated. The reality of life here in the Philippines...

Re: Child Custody Case
 

Thanks P11,

I guess i have not really answered his question,but i would like the OP to know that i am here to compare notes in the near future and for the long haul,should that be the case.

As i am at the start of something similar myself,i obviously have a keen interest on how this one will develop.

Re: Child Custody Case
 

Hi jaygee,
Sorry to hear that you find yourself in the same predicament as myself.
I'm going to private message you soon about my experiences with this whole ordeal.

Re: Child Custody Case
 

OK Mister Springle...feel free to do that.

Cheers.

Re: Child Custody Case
 

Under Philippines law (and both child and mother ARE citizens of the Philippines), the mother is automatically assumed to have custody of the child until it is at least 7 years old.
I would suggest that you try to establish an ongoing friendly relationship with the mother, rather than beating her over the head with court cases... which are only likely to fill the pockets of eager (but probably helpless) lawyers, and lead you into bankruptcy, and not even able to afford an airfare.

Re: Child Custody Case
 

Re: Child Custody Case
 

Who is this aimed at? I must have missed mention of infidelity, please do use the 'quote' button when replying to a post to a thread so people can see who you're responding to, thx.

Re: Child Custody Case
 

re:"Bimbo Types" and "cheating", That is PRESUMPTUOUS NONSENSE WRITTEN BY LILIWITCH THERE,who,incidentally,has only ever posted once on this forum.Interesting.

As for my current predicament,my ex has not been in touch with me for a very long time now,and is not answering my emails....she has introduced a new guy into my daughter's life,a man who seems intent on being my daughter's father.There is every chance that my ex will take my daughter to live in another country with her new partner,and thus disappear forever.The question is this.....what the hell can i do to stop this from happening?...where do i stand legally?...I presume that i have zero rights,even as a biological father.?

If this new guy applies to be her legal father while living with my daughter in another country knowing that i still want to be in my daughter's life,can i instigate litigation if/when i do catch up with my ex and her partner?

thanks in anticipation

Re: Child Custody Case
 

Does your name appear on your daughter’s birth certificate? It’s important to note that she both a Philippine and British citizen - whether she holds a British passport or not is irrelevant.

Re: Child Custody Case
 

So did you meet with the lawyer and if so what was the outcome?

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My name is not on the birth certificate.Here is the thing.When the baby was born i was not in the Filipines.My ex told me that the nurse at the Hospital told her that for the baby to have my surname on the Birth Certificate i would have to be present at the time of birth.My ex may have been given the wrong information by the nurse,OR OF COURSE,MY EX JUST MIGHT BE USING ADVICE FROM THE BIG BOOK OF FILIPINO LIES.

I guess the child is classed as illegitimate.Thank God for DNA tests.

Re: Child Custody Case
 

Good luck on that one>

Re: Child Custody Case
 

Sounds extremely plausible given the same policy is widely applied elsewhere. Otherwise what is to stop her giving any man’s name as the father?

Unless you can get your name added to the birth certificate or for her to acknowledge you as the biological father then I suspect you’re on a hiding to nothing.

Re: Child Custody Case
 

If my ex takes my daughter to a foreign country and makes her new Boyfriend my daughter's legal father,EVEN THOUGH SHE KNOWS THAT I AM THE REAL FATHER,is there any chance that i can file a case against her in a Court of Law (a vague question i know)?...during the past year i have sent her countless emails telling her asking her not to take my child to another country without informing me,but i am getting no response from her whatsoever.I have also requested that she makes me the legal father by dint of paperwork many times,but she is just blanking me.I do not even know if my daughter is still alive,or indeed,still living in the Filis!

The problem with this particular girl is that she thinks with her heart and not her head,which is a typical Filipino trait,as is her addiction to social media and her extreme crab-like jealous mentality.She will think notthing of taking my child to another country and never contacting me again.She would also think nothing of disobeying any court orders that were made against her,such is the simplicity of her poorly developed brain.

Re: Child Custody Case
 

At this point I think you’ll need to seek professional legal advice from a solicitor who specialises in Philippine family law.

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Hi Mr Springle, you said that you had DNA tests before you agreed to support the child. Are you supporting the child? If you get custody of the child are you able to care for the child in Britain?

If I were you and you are able to care for your little girl I would be looking at this as a business transaction and "buy" your daughter back. If you try the legal way you will spend a fortune and your daughter will be eighteen before she gets to England.

My second wife, (now on my third who is perfect) I also got pregnant with my son when I used to holiday a couple of times a year in PI. She rang and asked if she should have an abortion, I said no and that I would take care of it. The other part of the story was that she had two girls about three and one years old at the time. Now I organised for them all to come to NZ. My by now second wife told me that the family of the youngest girl wanted to have her. I said if they can look after her as well as I could, sure, otherwise no chance. Now I really don't know if I am a good guy or a bastard but the girl is now a young woman at university and I know my ex is in contact with the father so I'm sure my daughter who still calls me Dad is in contact too. For another classic Philippine twist to the story, at the time I wondered why they only wanted one of the girls, well after a year or two when the baby turned into a child it was absolutely clear that all the kids had different fathers. I never said anything but FIVE years later my ex told me that the girls had different fathers. She was surprised when I was not surprised, there is no accounting for how people think and how dumb they think other people are.

When I say "buy", your daughter back, I would start with something along the lines that you will continue to or start paying for your daughters expenses if you can FaceTime with your daughter, every day or whatever works. Just start slowly keep it simple and not too onerous.

If you are concerned that your child is getting the bash see if you cannot get the grandparents or another family to look after your girl. It is common occurrence and actually a way of life in PI so as time goes on you can form a relationship hopefully with them and have a better chance of getting co-operation and any chance of getting custody of your child. I do not know the mother but it is a way of life in PI to have someone else look after your child. I arranged for three of my brother in laws to come to NZ one couple left there one year old child in PI with my parents in law for two years while he worked and got himself and his wife organised. They had a second child before the first one arrived in NZ.

Money usually works because poverty from my observation is tough no matter how many smiles you see.

Regardless of the above my son turns eighteen in September I have had him full-time since he was 12. My ex had him from 8 to 12. Time goes so bloody quick you have to decide whether screwing up you life for years is really worth it. Do what you can let the rest go. I am 56 and have had incurable cancer for three years don't make the life you have a nightmare when realistically your chances of success are abysmal. You are not dealing with a system that anyone can explain so you are automatically at a huge disadvantage. I would not consider a lawyer or court action, going through a divorce in NZ or Britain is years of shit let alone a custody battle in PI.

Regards mike

Re: Child Custody Case
 

Hi Jaygee68 "such is the simplicity of her poorly developed brain."

Mate, the little girl with the poorly developed brain has got you by the balls and is squeezing.

Stop bloody emailing her, she knows that she is in control, stop following her bloody facebook or whatever.

I suggest you sit still and stop thinking she is a dumbarse, whether NZ, Britain or PI 95% of stuff on social media is bullshit. Every Filipina or Filipino is going to to live work and party in a foreign country. I'm guessing that about .01 % of the population achieve that aim. I am not talking about the OFWs who are often paid terrible money for their hard work and must return to PI.

She might have no boyfriends or ten boyfriends, in any case I would guess that you are not supporting her or the baby. Correct me if I am wrong. Any woman in any country will not give you the time of day if you are not prepared to pay your way.

Her heart controlling her head in my opinion is just foolish thinking. She is considering the best option which you are obviously not and from your description of your childs mothers mental faculties I have to wonder why you got together with her.

Perhaps you thought the girl with poorly developed brain would be easy to control and have your way with. Don't mean to be nasty but anyone that thinks any woman is not intelligent or capable of extreme cunning is himself a monstrous idiot and should not be allowed out of his country.

Good luck you may find that English pounds are far more effective than emails. Hope you can find a quality salve for your balls because the girl with the poorly developed brain has got plenty more squeezing on her agenda.

Regards Mike