Will my wireless laptop render me impotent?
Jun 28th 2007, 1:08 pm
#1
NZ ways is best ways :0)
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Joined: Oct 2006
Location: Christchurch, NZ
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Will my wireless laptop render me impotent?
So there's me, chatting away to all and sundry via messaging and forums etc on my laptop, when my mother-in-law (via Skype I may add) informs me that a recent programme called 'Panorama' shown on UK tv has said that:
Chaps who spend mucho-timeo on a wireless enabled lap-top computer will have their balls shrivelled into walnuts by them there dastardly radio waves and they will never produce kiddies as their 'female goalkeepers' will just be 'too good' for the 'perfomance lacking' spermies.
I have to say that the statement in ' ' were said by a man. Yup - I'm now worried.
True, or is my blood sucking mother-in-law just finding another reason why my genes will never be good enough for her daughter.........?
Chaps who spend mucho-timeo on a wireless enabled lap-top computer will have their balls shrivelled into walnuts by them there dastardly radio waves and they will never produce kiddies as their 'female goalkeepers' will just be 'too good' for the 'perfomance lacking' spermies.
I have to say that the statement in ' ' were said by a man. Yup - I'm now worried.
True, or is my blood sucking mother-in-law just finding another reason why my genes will never be good enough for her daughter.........?
Jun 28th 2007, 1:24 pm
#2
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Location: Whitby Wellington
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Re: Will my wireless laptop render me impotent?
So there's me, chatting away to all and sundry via messaging and forums etc on my laptop, when my mother-in-law (via Skype I may add) informs me that a recent programme called 'Panorama' shown on UK tv has said that:
Chaps who spend mucho-timeo on a wireless enabled lap-top computer will have their balls shrivelled into walnuts by them there dastardly radio waves and they will never produce kiddies as their 'female goalkeepers' will just be 'too good' for the 'perfomance lacking' spermies.
I have to say that the statement in ' ' were said by a man. Yup - I'm now worried.
True, or is my blood sucking mother-in-law just finding another reason why my genes will never be good enough for her daughter.........?
Chaps who spend mucho-timeo on a wireless enabled lap-top computer will have their balls shrivelled into walnuts by them there dastardly radio waves and they will never produce kiddies as their 'female goalkeepers' will just be 'too good' for the 'perfomance lacking' spermies.
I have to say that the statement in ' ' were said by a man. Yup - I'm now worried.
True, or is my blood sucking mother-in-law just finding another reason why my genes will never be good enough for her daughter.........?
Jun 28th 2007, 1:28 pm
#3
NZ ways is best ways :0)
Thread Starter
Joined: Oct 2006
Location: Christchurch, NZ
Posts: 1,109
Jun 28th 2007, 1:29 pm
#4
NZ ways is best ways :0)
Thread Starter
Joined: Oct 2006
Location: Christchurch, NZ
Posts: 1,109
Re: Will my wireless laptop render me impotent?
Yup ladies and gentlemen, I'm here all week 
Jun 28th 2007, 1:44 pm
#6
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Re: Will my wireless laptop render me impotent?
Wi-Fi dangers:
"you have a large number of various effects like chromosome damage, you have impact on the concentration capacity and decrease in short term memory, increases in the number of cancer incidences," said Professor Olle Johansson of the Karolinska Institute in Sweden. " on Panorama
Sitting in a Wi-Fi hotspot (i.e. where you are able to recieve wi-fi). for one year is equivalent to 20 minutes mobile phone use according to the UK government.
The real danger is, apparently, to younger children who's skulls are less thick. So, maybe it's not a good idea to run a transmitter in the kids bedroom and probably not a good idea to let them us the laptop on their laps either.
I have to say that having worked on microwave 'radio' equipment whilst in the forces many years ago I've never believed the government and industries claims that transmissions from mobiles 'won't harm you'.
"you have a large number of various effects like chromosome damage, you have impact on the concentration capacity and decrease in short term memory, increases in the number of cancer incidences," said Professor Olle Johansson of the Karolinska Institute in Sweden. " on Panorama
Sitting in a Wi-Fi hotspot (i.e. where you are able to recieve wi-fi). for one year is equivalent to 20 minutes mobile phone use according to the UK government.
The real danger is, apparently, to younger children who's skulls are less thick. So, maybe it's not a good idea to run a transmitter in the kids bedroom and probably not a good idea to let them us the laptop on their laps either.
I have to say that having worked on microwave 'radio' equipment whilst in the forces many years ago I've never believed the government and industries claims that transmissions from mobiles 'won't harm you'.
Last edited by justinthyme; Jun 28th 2007 at 1:47 pm.
Jun 28th 2007, 1:55 pm
#7
NZ ways is best ways :0)
Thread Starter
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Location: Christchurch, NZ
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Re: Will my wireless laptop render me impotent?
Thanks to all those who did - or did not - participate in this research. We hope that you all have perfectly - sort of (for legal reasons) - formed kids in the future....
Jun 28th 2007, 7:08 pm
#8
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Re: Will my wireless laptop render me impotent?
I don't like to think wot your m.i.l is thinking your doing with the laptop scary!!!!!! but I think you are right its another reason to say yur not good enough for her daughter. I would say yr only gonna become impodent if your OH see's the programmes you've been looking at.
Jun 28th 2007, 8:04 pm
#9
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Location: Hutt Valley, Wellington, New Zealand
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Re: Will my wireless laptop render me impotent?
Chaps who spend mucho-timeo on a wireless enabled lap-top computer will have their balls shrivelled into walnuts by them there dastardly radio waves and they will never produce kiddies as their 'female goalkeepers' will just be 'too good' for the 'perfomance lacking' spermies.
Bugger...if I'd known that, I could have avoided the vascectomy!! Bit late now!
Last edited by dicknlyn; Jun 28th 2007 at 8:06 pm.
Jun 28th 2007, 10:49 pm
#10
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Re: Will my wireless laptop render me impotent?
Jun 28th 2007, 11:13 pm
#11
Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 2,813
Re: Will my wireless laptop render me impotent?
Shit! I thought the salesman said a laptop would make me important.
Bugger!:curse:
Bugger!:curse:
Jun 29th 2007, 12:06 am
#12
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Location: Wellington
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Re: Will my wireless laptop render me impotent?
I think you should be fin Wiz, I am basing this on the fact that you need to have a pair of balls before your lap top will affect them.
Jun 29th 2007, 12:15 am
#13
NZ ways is best ways :0)
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Re: Will my wireless laptop render me impotent?
No smiley.
Jun 29th 2007, 12:30 am
#14
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Re: Will my wireless laptop render me impotent?
Jun 29th 2007, 1:10 am
#15
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Re: Will my wireless laptop render me impotent?
Cue the Forum Police: Now boys, play nice please.